Unexpected Things
by Oranakka
Summary: "We'll get through this, we always do." Aaron and Emily finally find their way together, but it doesn't mean life is smooth sailing. A lot can happen when you spend eight years at the White House. Thankfully, they always have each other's back. Rated M in chapter 3 & 22 mostly, the rest is rated T.
1. The Beginning

A/N : Hey there, so this is my first fan fiction in the Designated Survivor fandom. At first, the idea was to write prompts about Emily & Aaron that could be both read as a fiction or as one shots, but in the end, everything is much more linked that it was supposed to be, so it became a normal story.

Feel free to review, follow and favorite this story, support is everything. I promise I'll try to go and read your stories too (if you have some).

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THE BEGINNING

Emily was exhausted. Being the White House Chief of Staff was getting on her nerves. Working for the President of the United States was way harder than working for the Secretary of Housing and Urban Development and she could realize it every single day.

The day of the bombing, she had instantly realized her life would get complicated. She had thrown herself into all of this, making her way to the West Wing to help Tom Kirkman instead of running away. The day after, she had considered giving up for one second, shocked and traumatized by what had just happened, but ambition and loyalty had made her fought for the job of Chief of Staff. She had spent days bickering with Aaron Shore for the job, and she had not gotten it. When he had gotten the job instead of her, she had even been mad, at herself, at Tom Kirkman and at Aaron. She had thought she deserved it more than anyone else, and seeing this pretentious deputy chief of staff stealing her job had made her angry. That is the second time she had thought of resigning, but it had been quickly pushed out of her mind again. She had accepted the job of Special Adviser and had decided to go on like that. But then a few months later, the same pretentious guy had resigned after she had investigated him, after she had thought he was guilty of treason and after he had been interrogated by the FBI. Suddenly, she had had replaced him, and her life had become a hot mess.

Not even a week after becoming chief of staff, she had started to wonder why she had fought for this job, and why Aaron had fought. It was just so hard, she didn't know how could anyone want this job. Plus, Aaron was the deputy before the attack, he knew how hard this was. Now that she was the one in charge, the one dealing with everything, she regretted every single day taking over Aaron. Today was no exception.

First, there was a huge sanitary crisis coming, and she did not how to handle it: the one person who could solve the crisis was doing his business instead of handling the stock of medicine he had, and it was pissing her off. She couldn't understand why profit would always win, even when the lives of thousands of people were at stakes. She always wanted to fight for the greater good, and there were things she would probably never get.

Then, there was just the day in itself. It sucked, like any other day since she had become chief of staff. She was constantly tired, rarely slept more than four hours a night, and had slept 5 hours in the last 48. She just couldn't handle it anymore. Drinking cup of coffee after cup of coffee wasn't even working anymore, and the layer of make-up had become so thick that it could take her half an hour every night to take it off. Sometimes, she would even wonder why she was taking it off, since she would be back at work only four hours later. Though, it seemed that she was quite good at faking it, since no one had mentioned anything yet, and as long as she looked strong to the rest of the world, that was good enough for her.

Last but not least, her sentimental life was also close to nothing. It was actually another hot mess she did not want to think about. But unlike anything else happening in her life right now, she couldn't avoid the reason of this hot mess, since he was here, working with her every day: Aaron Shore. She had kissed him, or he had kissed her. Maybe they had kissed. She wasn't quite sure of how all of this had happened, but the result was still the same. Despite him being an obnoxious person the first few days they had worked together, she had learned to know him, like him, and even more: love him. It seemed that his time as a Chief of Staff had changed him, and they had started to get along. At the time, the constant bickering had been a game, but it had also been a real pressure, and it had felt good when the tension had finally eased. But then, Tom Kirkman had asked her to investigate him, and the semblance of relationship that had started to build between them had suddenly just been a distant thought.

As for him, he had learned to trust her, to love her, and then to hate her. But to love her anyway. It was quite a weird feeling to love and to hate one person at the same time. He had felt betrayed after she could think he was the mole in the White House, that he could be capable of treason, especially the day just after they had shared that first kiss. He had resigned a week later, and though a lot of reasons had made him make that decision, the possibility of not seeing Emily ever again had been an important part in it. After that, he had thought of going back home to Mexico, where most of his family was still living. He had been so hurt that for him, only drastic changes away from D.C. could make him feel better. He didn't really know what he could have done in Mexico, especially in his small hometown, but he was so sure that his political career in Washington was over. Nobody would ever hire someone who had been suspected of treason in the worst terror attack on the U.S. soil since 9/11. He could say that being unemployed had its benefits though. He was finally able to sleep at a decent time and for a decent amount of time, and he could finally do whatever he wanted whenever he wanted. He had started running again, and had even been back to the boxing ring to let his anger fade away.

But then, what makes life worth living is its uncertainty and the crazy moments in it. So when Kimble Hookstraten had offered him a job as Chief Strategist, he had accepted, even though he didn't like her and didn't trust her. He didn't even have the same political opinions than her, but in a post-Capitol bombing world, it seemed that no one couldn't be really picky about anything. Working for Hookstraten had also its benefits. He could sleep more than four hours a night, and he had to meet Emily only a couple of times a week, which to be honest, had already been way too much for him.

Time had passed, and things had become better. A few months later, he had been able to work with Emily again and he was back at the White House as National Security Adviser. He had forgiven her and they had sort of talk about it. Tension was still very real, but they were able to work together on a daily basis. In a sort of deja-vu evening with a glass of scotch, she had told him how remorse had eaten her up since everything had happened, how sorry she was. Deep in his heart, he already knew that and he knew only bad circumstances had led her to investigate him. She had told him that she had never believed he was a traitor, and that she had done that only to prove his innocence. He had believed her, he had no reason not to, and since then things had seem to be sort of okay between them.

Today was a day like another, but in worse. This sanitary crisis had taken up all of his time and was exasperating him. Observing Emily, who was now technically his boss, he could tell that it was the same for her. He had noticed that she was wearing more make-up than usual to hide the shadows under her eyes, and that her smile was different, that it was less genuine. As soon as she was turning her back and walking away, he could see that her smile would fade and that she would be about to cry. He was really surprised at how good she was at faking it. Having been at her place before, he knew how hard some days could be, and he was really impressed by her strength. But no matter what, he still cared about her.

Half of the day had gone by like that, and he was really starting to worry about her. He could see how sleep-deprived she was and much she needed to rest. So when he saw her closing the door of her office after another national security meeting, he followed her, decided to confront her, knocked at her door and opened it before she could say anything.

"Aaron, what the hell?" she exclaimed, surprised by his very unusual attitude.

Her door was closed for only a few seconds, but he could already see tears starting to roll on her cheeks.

"What is going on Emily? You look like hell. And you're crying…" Aaron answered.

"Thanks for the compliment." she grumbled. "Nothing you need to worry about, I am just super tired, I slept like… 5 hours in the last two days."

"Well, maybe you should just go home and rest. You cannot continue like that" he offered.

"It's not as if I had a choice… Aaron…" Emily tried to calm herself.

"You do… You have a deputy, I know he's new and I don't know him as well as you do, but I'm sure he can handle taking over you for a couple of days. That's what he is here for…"

"Obviously you don't know him if you think that. Last time that I left for half a day, everything was such a mess when I came back that it took me 2 whole days to put everything back in order."

"Because you are a perfectionist…"

"Of course I am ! Kirkman counts on me !"

"President or not, Kirkman is a man like another, he knows that sometimes you need a break."

All along their conversation, Aaron had walked closer to her, step by step, and he could see the tears running down her cheeks.

"Come here." he said.

He took her in his arms and she started sobbing. She looked so fragile at that moment that it affected him more than he thought it would. He had missed her so much. He held her like that for a bit, and then put his hand under her chin to raise her face a little bit toward him.

"Emily, look at me. You are a strong independent woman, you do a great job everyday. I've been there before. Sometimes too it was hard. I lost everybody I knew last year in the bombing, suddenly I was the only surviving member of the last administration, and I was the new Chief of Staff." Aaron said.

"And you lost your job because of me. Please don't remind me that, I hate myself everyday for all of it. Right now I wish you could take it back…" she answered, still sobbing.

"I can take it back for a few days if you want. I'll do everything to help you. Please, don't hate yourself for what you've done, it's done now, and it wasn't your fault. It took me time, but I get it, I understand why you did what you did."

"It doesn't mean that what I did was good."

"It doesn't, but it means that I forgive you."

Still crying, her face was coming nearer his every second, and she kissed him. This time, she was sure it was her who kissed him. And it felt good. Their kiss deepened and all of her emotions were mixed, comfort and regret, love and sadness. It felt good to him too, it was better than their first kiss. He didn't know why, but he just knew it was better. Maybe because this time it was really unexpected, they were not dancing around each other anymore. They had sort of given up any hope of anything happening between them, so he had come to her office with no hidden thought. He had just truly cared about her.

And then suddenly, the kiss stopped. Aaron had stopped it and Emily felt a wave of uncertainty overwhelm her. Why? Why did he do that? She looked scared and he saw it.

"I'll go talk to Kirkman, tell him that you need to rest and I'll take over you for the next couple of days. And then I'll drive you home. No arguing. You need to rest."

She opened her mouth to say something, but she was stopped by his finger on her mouth. He had said no arguing. So she gave up and didn't argue. She didn't even have the strength to argue anyway. He left her office to go talk to the President while she prepared her bag, not forgetting to bring homework anyway. Five minutes later, they were on their way to Emily's apartment, and she fell asleep before they arrived. He took her in his arms and brought her in her apartment where he put her on the bed. She moved a bit, grunting, and turned on her stomach. He took off her heals, put the cover on her and kissed her temple. He didn't know what would happen next, he didn't know if it was the beginning of something or not, but he knew that life was made of unexpected things.


	2. The Note

THE NOTE

Emily woke up with a start, breathing rapidly, and looked at the clock. It was 11 a.m. and she was late for work, extremely late. And she couldn't find her phone. She looked everywhere but she couldn't find it. And why wasn't it ringing? Her phone was never on silence mode, she needed it all the time. She ran toward the hallway looking for her purse. It was the only place she had not checked for her phone, if it wasn't there, it was nowhere. She was so sure of that. The desperate look on her face after emptying completely her purse could tell it all. She couldn't find her phone and was really starting to freak out. She could feel the headache coming, so she walked to the kitchen to get a glass of water, trying to clear her head and think where she could have left her phone. And that's when she saw it, right on the kitchen counter, with a note on it.

 _"I don't know what you remember or what you don't, but I took over you for the next two days. And I put your phone on silent mode. You don't need to work while on a break. I also took the files you had brought home, day off means no work._

 _See you soon,_

 _-Aaron"_

And then everything flashed: Her being exhausted and tensed, her crying in her office and Aaron spotting her crying, her being ashamed of crying in front of him… And a kiss. Wait what? Did she seriously do that? She rolled her eyes thinking about it and said to herself:

"That's going to be interesting to deal with…"

Then, she walked toward the fridge and saw another note on it.

 _"Step 1 for a good break: Making a great breakfast_

 _Take the pancake mix in your cupboard._

 _1 cup of pancake mix_

 _1/2 cup of water_

 _Mix everything in a bowl, and take a frying pan. Heat it, and then… Well, you've done pancakes before? Right? So you know._

 _Take berries in the fridge, and maple syrup in the cupboard. Pour yourself a glass of orange juice. Turn on the music, I chose something that I thought you would enjoy for a nice morning at home._

 _-Aaron"_

She laughed when she saw that. Was he serious? Well, ok then, she would do it and follow his note. So she took the remote, and turned on the music. New Orleans jazz was pulsing through the speakers, and she smiled. She wasn't listening to jazz that often, but obviously he was, and he had great tastes. She didn't even know he was listening to that kind of music and she loved being able to discover him in a new way. It made her happy and she started moving along the music while making the pancakes.

Then, after the breakfast, she decided to go take a shower. She walked toward the bathroom and when she entered, she saw another note. She smiled, curious and walked closer tot read it. She didn't know where this would go, but she had to admit she liked following instructions like that. For once, she wasn't the one giving the orders.

 _"Step 2 for a good break: Enjoying a spa morning_

 _Undress and go in the shower. Turn on the shower and enjoy the hot water coming from the water head. Let the water run down your body, feel it. Stay there for at least 20 minutes. But don't count, otherwise there is no fun in that. When you go out of your shower, take the hot towel on the towel rack, and wrap yourself in it. Take the peel off mask in your drawer, the body moisturizer and pretty much everything you can. I'm no good at those things, but do your things, and enjoy taking care of yourself._

 _-Aaron"_

She laughed, realizing that he had rummaged though her stuff in the bathroom, and even though it was slightly inappropriate to open the drawers of someone you didn't really know, she smiled at how attentive he was. So she did everything that was written on the note and took all the time she wanted just for herself.

It was already 2 p.m. when she emerged from the bathroom, and she felt refreshed like she had not been in a while. She took her phone and sent a message to Aaron to thank him for what he had done. She was truly amazed at him, and she could feel herself falling for him a little more every single day.

 _"Hey. I just wanted to thank you for the notes, it was very enjoyable. But it would be even nicer if I could thank you over dinner…_

 _-Em"_

He answered a few minutes later, and she wondered whether he didn't have too much work with her being absent.

 _"I'm glad you like it. But obviously, if you are still asking for dinner, it means that you didn't read all the notes that I left you._

 _-Aaron"_

She raised an eyebrow at the sight of this message. She looked around her flat, but she couldn't see any other note. She wondered where she had not looked, and she finally saw a little piece of paper on the table of the dining room. She happily walked toward it, and glanced at it before realizing it was step 4. So it meant there was another one before, and she decided to read this one later. She loved this little game, and she wanted to do it in the right order. She looked up, and saw a note on the coffee table just in front of the couch…. Here it was.

 _"Step 3 for a good break: A binge watching afternoon._

 _First, go to the kitchen and prepare coffee in a mug. Bring it back in the living room and put it on the table next to you. Take the blanket on the couch and wrap yourself in it. Sit on the couch, put the pillow under your head, and lie down. Turn the TV on, and choose the hard disk drive that is plugged to your TV. No politics, nothing about the White House. Please, play along. Don't turn CNN on. There are only things that will make you smile, laugh, be scared, or cry, all those things that I'm sure you'll love for a good binge watching afternoon. Choose what you want, and just spend the whole afternoon in front of it._

 _-Aaron"_

She smiled while reading the note, and realized that Aaron had thought of everything. Though, she wondered when he had found the time to do all that, as she did not remember him bringing a hard disk drive. But in the meantime, she was sound asleep even before arriving at home, and she just remembered feeling someone put her on the bed. Maybe Aaron had spent more time than she thought in her apartment, maybe he even had slept here. But she doubted it. He had taken her home in the afternoon, so he had surely gone back to the White House at one point. She realized that she was starting to think about what was happening at work at that moment, so she shook her head as if she wanted to take this thought out of her head. She chose to watch one of those funny TV series with recorded laughs in the background which she usually hated. Though, today she was in a mood for something silly, and this TV series was the best to take her mind off of work.

The afternoon went by pretty quickly, and after watching more episodes than she could watch in a month, she realized she still had not read the fourth note that she had seen earlier in the day. Suddenly, she had a smile on her face at the idea to read what Aaron had planned for her next. She walked toward the table where she had left the note and started reading it.

 _"Step 4 for a good break: Make a nice dinner and invite the National Security Adviser to share the dinner with._

 _Go to your kitchen and open the drawers. Take out the rice for risotto, an onion and chicken stock. Take mushrooms, the bottle of white wine and the butter in the fridge. Cut the mushrooms in small pieces and start frying the butter in the frying pan. In the meantime, heat water and put the chicken stock in it, mix it until its diluted. Put butter in another pan and brown the onion in it (Don't forget to chop it before!). Add the rice in it. When the rice is starting to be transparent add about half a cup of white wine in it. Add also the mushrooms that were cooking in the other pan. Mix gently everything, and wait until the rice absorbed all the wine. Pour a little bit of the chicken stock in the pan, and mix gently until the rice absorbed all the liquid. Do that again and again until you emptied the bowl of chicken stock. If it's been about 20 minutes that the rice is cooking, then it is good to be eaten. Check the timing. If it's about 8:00 p.m. the National Security Adviser that you invited is about to ring at your door. Don't start to cook too early otherwise you'll have to order pizza instead… Don't start too late, otherwise, he might be hungry and grumpy…"_

This note made Emily laugh out loud and she looked at the clock. It was already 7:00 p.m, so she decided to start cooking. She knew it would take her time to cook, she liked it, but she wasn't cooking often enough to be good at it. She started listening to music and dance along, just like she had done earlier this morning. She liked those kind of days, not thinking about everything but enjoying herself. She was so happy about it that she was not even stressed about Aaron coming home to dine with her. Was it a date ? She was not sure, but she did not care.

Soon enough, the bell was ringing, and she realized Aaron was already there. She opened the door and smiled at him, she was excited to see him.

"Thank you thank you thank you! This day was amazing! I loved your notes!" she said almost bouncing on her feet and restraining herself from jumping in his arms.

Aaron smiled. He could see in her shining eyes that she was genuinely happy.

"I'm glad you liked it. And I have to say that it smells very good in here. So I guess that you managed to follow the instructions." Aaron answered.

"Well, you'll have to tell me if it is good enough for you, but I sure enjoyed cooking. It had been a while I had not done that." Emily continued, while inviting him into the living room.

She had set the table and put some nice candles in between them. This sure looked like a date, but who cared, tonight she didn't want to put words on what they were or weren't, she just wanted to enjoy being with him. They sat at the table and she poured wine in their glasses, she wanted to talk about the White House, how everything was going, but Aaron stopped her, telling her everything was fine and she was still on a break. So they started talking about what she had done during her day and other things, what they liked or didn't like. It looked like they were discovering each other again, but no tension could be felt between them. They were just two normal human beings, having a nice dinner together and enjoying it.

Later that evening, they had migrated to the couch after dinner, and the bottle of wine ended up empty after pouring down another glass. They were slightly light-headed and everything felt good. They were talking, they were laughing. The wine had uninhibited them, and they kissed. Again, and again, and again.


	3. The Fire

**This chapter is rated M. Pure smut. You are warned ;)**

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THE FIRE

Aaron was about to leave Emily's apartment after the amazing evening they had spent together. They had talked, the had kissed and he was now at the front door, kissing her one more time before going back to his own apartment.

"I should go… I have to work early tomorrow…" Aaron said in between two kisses.

"I know… You should…" Emily answered, desperate to see him leaving after such an evening.

Their lips were like sealed, they couldn't leave each other, they had to but they wanted to stay together forever. Desperately, Aaron stopped kissing her and started walking away, forcing himself not to turn back.

"Aaron…" Emily called in a breath, despair in her voice.

It was too much. He turned his back to face her one more time, and she grabbed his jacket, bringing him closer to her, kissing him again. They both knew it, this time, there was no going back. She pushed him back inside the apartment and they closed the door. She had already taken his jacket off of his shoulders, discarding it somewhere on the floor, and she directed him toward the bedroom. Their hands were travelling on each other's body, caressing, touching, grabbing. They could already feel the desire build up in their core, already wanting to be one. He took off his shoes and socks and she pushed him on the bed. He fell on his back, and she took the lead, continuing to undress him, but suddenly, his lips were not on hers anymore.

"Should we do that ?" Aaron asked

"Give me one good reason why we shouldn't." Emily answered

"I don't have any"

"That's what I thought"

She started attacking him again with her kisses, this time in his neck. He had pulled on the hem of her tee-shirt and she was now only with her bra, facing him, exposed. She suddenly realized how undressed she was and felt shy. Aaron saw it and smiled softly.

"You're stunning, Emily"

He sat up the best he could, forcing Emily to sat up on him too, and put his hand in her back, kissing her in the neck, going down to the valley of her breasts, just on top of it above her bra. Emily's shyness had disappeared, his lips on her felt so good, the heat was starting to build in her body. Her sighs of satisfaction and pleasure made him smile against her body. She pushed him back to lay on the bed and starting to undo the buttons of his shirt, placing a new kiss further down with each button she was undoing. Once all the buttons were gone, she admired his perfect torso, her hands traveling up and down his body, and she wondered how he still had the time to work out with their jobs and the crazy hours. She was captivated by him. Aaron took the opportunity to unclasp her bra and he took it off slowly. His eyes on her newly uncovered breasts, he realized he could probably never get tired of this view. She was truly stunning. He rolled her over to be on top and started kissing her nipples, licking and sucking, her moans starting to fill the room.

"Aaron"

He went further down on her and started sliding her pants down her legs, tracing a path of kisses from her hips to her feet. His hands were still caressing her, but never going where she wanted him the most. She started pleading him, but he was back on her lips, hushing her with his kisses. She started unbuckling his belt and unzipped his pants, and pushed them down his legs with his help. They were suddenly equally undressed, but before she could be satisfied with this vision, he started attacking her panties. His lips had finally gone down exactly were she wanted him the most, and even through the fabric, his ministrations were feeling good. Glancing at her, as if he was waiting for some kind of approval that he knew he already had, he slipped his hands under the elastic band of her underwear and started sliding them down her legs. Going back between her legs, he slid his tongue on her clit, and that's all it took to make her moan out loud. Long licks from bottom to top, sucking the bundle of nerve that was already so sensitive, he definitely knew how to do it, and Emily could feel herself getting wet with every second. She wouldn't it wouldn't take long before she would climax, he was just too good at this. On of his hand was on her hips, as if he wanted to hold her as still as possible, but she couldn't handle it, she was arching toward him. He started sliding his other hand right in her core between her legs, and a scream of surprise escape her lips. Pushing back and forth inside her with one finger, that soon became two, she could feel her heartbeat getting faster. She was so wet his fingers were sliding with ease in her, and the combination of his tongue still on her clit and his fingers in her was driving her crazy. Suddenly, he stopped sucking her clit and his mouth traveled back up, kissing and sucking her nipples, and back further up, sucking in her neck. She would climax soon, she knew it, and he could feel it too. She was moaning, his name like a prayer escaping her lips. And then, murmured in her ear.

"Let go"

He bit her lobe softly while his hand was still on her clit, faster than ever, and she suddenly started trembling, screaming. She had just orgasmed in front of Aaron Shore, thanks to Aaron Shore's lips and hands, and she was feeling better than she had ever felt.

Letting her recover from this, he lied on the bed, next to her. He couldn't help but grin, he was just so proud of himself. Making Emily Rhodes come was something he had dreamed of for a long time, and it was now a reality. Suddenly, she climbed back on him, kissing him eagerly.

"You're already ready for another round?" he asked.

"Don't even dare challenging me on this…" she smirked.

It was easier for her, he was already mostly undressed, and she just had to take off his underwear. He was so hard from seeing her climax that he knew he wouldn't last long, especially if Emily decided to go down on him to return the favor. She kissed his torso from top to bottom, her hands traveling back and forth. She couldn't get why, but she loved his torso, his muscles, she was amazed. Moving further down, her hands were soon on his underwear, and she started playing with the elastic band of it. Her hand was gently caressing the bump that she could feel through his boxers, teasing, and she could already hear him breath faster.

"Oh my… Emily Rhodes what are you doing to me…" he gasped.

She started taking his underwear down, slowly, too slowly for him. But she was determined to let this last as long as possible. And then, she took his length in her mouth. The sensation made him moan loudly, as she started caressing his balls, making his moan even louder. She continued to suck and lick, Aaron's hand sliding in her hair. She had never gone down on a man during a first night, but it was Aaron, and Aaron was making her bold, he was making her do things she would never have imagined. It didn't last as long as she had imagined, he couldn't take it anymore, and he suddenly asked her to stop.

"Emily, stop, stop, I can't handle it anymore, I'm gonna come if you continue…"

"Already?"

"You cannot understand what you're doing to me… It's… indescribable. Come here". he said, inviting her to straddle him.

So she did, and she could suddenly feel all of him inside her. It had been a while for both of them, and the feeling of being perfectly interlocked together was already taking them over the edge. As she started moving, he put his hands on her hips to hold her. The rhythm was perfect, everything was so perfect. She was so wet from her previous orgasm that they were sliding with easiness. They were trying to take their time, but it was just too good, they knew neither of them would last long. He pushed her on the side and fell on her, taking control of the rhythm. With that, his lips were on her neck, kissing and sucking, surely leaving marks in the crook on her neck. She desperately wanted to scream his name, and the little bit of self-conscience she still had made him bite his shoulder in an attempt to keep quiet. Going faster and faster, they both could feel they would come soon. Her arms were around his neck, keeping him close to her, her hands in his hair, they needed the closeness. Coming for the second time of the night, her legs started to shiver, releasing their grip around his waist, and with one last movement, he came too, a loud grunt escaping his mouth.

He let himself fall on her, and she kept her arms around him, holding him close to her. They were both trying to catch their breath, not really used to this kind of workout anymore.

"Aaron Shore, what are you doing to me…"

He laughed, the imitation of what he had said before obvious, and finally rolled on his side. She put her head on his arm, cuddling with him.

"Now we're equal, you understand me" he answered.

"No we're not, there will be a comeback. You made me come twice, that's unfair to you…"

"Nothing is unfair when it comes to Emily Rhodes' pleasure…"

She slapped him gently on the torso, laughing at his comment. Pulling the covers back on them, she cuddled closer to him, interweaving her legs with his.

"You know, seeing what time it is, I think you should just sleep here." Emily said

"You sure? I don't want to wake you up at 5:30…"

"Well, it's already tomorrow, I actually am pretty comfy in your arms right now, and I'm sure I'll manage to go back to sleep after you leave…"

"Well then, since you ask so nicely, I might stay." he laughed

No other word was pronounced, they continued to cuddle a bit before falling asleep. These arms were officially Emily Rhodes' new happy place.


	4. The Tension

THE TENSION

After a couple of days off, Emily was finally back at work. She was excited but stressed, as a lot of things had changed during this short period of time. It was 7 a.m. and she was already in her office, trying to catch up on what she had missed. Thank God though, Aaron was much better at organizing stuffs than her deputy, and she was quickly caught up with everything. She was really glad he had taken over her instead of her deputy. Suddenly, someone knocked at the door.

"Do you need an update on what's happening at the White House?"

"Hello to you too, Aaron Shore…"

He closed the door of her office halfway and kissed her quickly.

"You know someone could see us…" she said, concerned but happy with his gesture.

"Not many people at that time in the hallways. I promise I'll be discreet" he answered, smiling at her.

"I didn't say that I didn't like it though…" she replied kissing him one more time before regaining the composure needed in such a building.

"So, I guess I should show you what you've missed, right?"

"Well, I've been through most of it, but I won't say no to a little update anyway"

They spent half an hour talking about everything that had happened during Emily's absence, and then they started their respective day, each in their own office. Emily was well refreshed from her days off, and she was very efficient. Everything went smoothly until the beginning of the afternoon, when they were called into the situation room. It was a hostage crisis, and soon the tension was rising. President Kirkman was required to make decisions, but he was lost between what he should do or shouldn't do, and the tension between his two most trusted advisers was not helping him. They couldn't agree on anything. The poised and calm Aaron Shore was facing the fiery instinctive Emily Rhodes, and everybody could see it in the room.

"A mother and her daughter are held in Afghanistan. They are family members of an American soldier who is stationed in Afghanistan. We need to get them out of here as soon as we can." Emily said.

"We started discussing with the hostage-takers, they want a compensation." Aaron answered.

"What is the compensation?" Tom Kirkman asked

"They want us to release 10 men imprisoned in Guantanamo. They were captured when US troops arrived in Afghanistan back in 2001. They were all sentenced for terrorism, some will be released soon, others not before 2035." Aaron explained.

"We cannot get them out, this is out of the question" President Kirkman declared

"So what other solution do we have then?" Emily asked

"We need to continue discussing with them. As long as they continue to discuss, we can save them, talking is everything in these kind of situations"

"So that's all you offer? Discussing? And what about the hostages? We just let them chit-chat with their abductors for days?" Emily answered on a sarcastic tone. "We cannot do that. The girl is 7 years old. We need to go get them."

"We cannot "go get them"" Aaron answered, icy. "We don't even know precisely where they are"

"How is that even possible? It's been 16 years American soldiers are roaming Afghanistan and we still don't know how to find two hostages?"

"We heard about their captivity 2 hours ago. What do you think we've been doing for two hours? Afghanistan is almost the size of Texas!"

"What about money?"

"We never give money to hostage-takers. You know that. We never have and we never will."

"But this is about a woman and her daughter!"

"And we will save them just the way we saved the other hostages we've had to deal with in the past".

Their voices were raising and tension was obvious to anyone in the room. They were not themselves and everybody was astonished they could behave like that. Aaron Shore and Emily Rhodes had always been professional, whether it was in the command ops or anywhere near or in the White House. But right now, Emily was thinking with all her heart, and it was breaking from imagining a little girl, the age of her nieces, held hostage in a foreign country. She was reacting as if she was directly concerned by the situation, as if it was her own family who was in Afghanistan. On the other hand, Aaron was always the same reasonable and poised man, only acting after intense thoughts. It was as if nothing could ever make him change his mind, nothing could make him take a rash decision. It wasn't the first time Emily and Aaron were disagreeing on things, it was actually even pretty common for them disagree, especially at work, but it was probably the first time their voices were raising and they were loosing their temper. Tom Kirkman was sitting at the end of the table, stunned by their behavior, his head between his hands. Suddenly, he exclaimed.

"Enough you two! What is going with you? I need advice, not stupid ego quarrels".

Everybody shut up. They were all astonished by the president's comment. Aaron and Emily both automatically regained composure, taken out of their bubble.

"I apologize, Sir." she said.

"Apologies Mr. President" Aaron continued.

"Now that everybody has calmed down, what should we do?" Tom Kirkman asked the Joint Chiefs in the room.

They discussions started again, calmer this time, and continued for a good two hours before anyone could find a solution that suited the president. However, Aaron and Emily had barely talked during this time, and the tension was still very obvious between them. They were glancing at each other from time to time, pissed they could have lost their temper like that. Both were wondering why they had acted like that and if it had anything to do with them sleeping together or not. They couldn't quite find the connection between their relationship and work, but they knew they couldn't do it ever again. At one point, the president rose from his seat and walked out, followed quickly by Emily. As they were going back to the elevator, Tom Kirkman started speaking.

"Emily, I don't know what is going on between you two and I don't want to know, but I do not ever want to see this again. This is unacceptable from my two most trusted advisors. I need to count on you, at all time. Disagreeing is something. It makes us move forward. Yelling at each other is something else. It doesn't go anywhere and this will not reproduce in the command ops or anywhere near the White House." Tom Kirkman lectured.

"I am deeply sorry Mr. President. This is all my fault. My nieces are the same age this little girl, I put myself in a position I should not have." Emily tried to excuse.

"This is not all your fault. Aaron should not have raised his voice neither. You were both at fault. I hope this will never happen again. You two work great together, I would hate being obliged to break the team you make because you cannot behave yourselves in public."

"This won't happen again Mr. President".

They separated ways and Emily went back to her office where she continued working on a bill. Though, it was hard for her to concentrate. She was still pissed at Aaron, she couldn't understand why he acted the way he acted, but in the same time, she was also mad at herself for behaving the way she did. It was not her, she wasn't herself. Her heart was beating fast, she couldn't help thinking about Aaron, about the reasons they had fought like that. She was ashamed of herself, was already starting to wonder whether it was a good idea or not to start a relation with Aaron. She had wanted it for a long time, but she wasn't so sure about it anymore. Was this relation worth her place in the White House? Was it worth her job, her life ? She needed to relax and get a grip back on herself. Taking her shoes off, she sat comfortably on the sofa of her office and closed her eyes, trying to regulate her respiration.

Aaron was still in the command ops, trying to prevent his emotions from failing him. He was so mad at himself and at Emily, he would never have imagined that something like that could happen. He could feel his muscles were still tense and concentrating on the situation in front of him was harder than it should be. The president had given orders and they now needed to follow them to get the hostages back to the U.S. safe and sound. It was the fifth hour he was spending in the command ops, and he could feel all of his muscles starting to be sore. Trying to stretch out discreetly, he realized he really needed a break, and decided to walk back to his office for five minutes and get a bottle of water. Sitting down in his chair for just a couple of minutes, he closed his eyes and tried to steady his breathing. Emily would be the death of him. He couldn't let her get to him like that, he could never happen again, whatever the feelings he had for her, and whatever the relation they had. Checking the time on his phone, he realized the five minutes had already passed. Walking back to the situation room, he crossed Emily's path who was on her way to make tea, clearly also stressed with everything. They stopped walking and looked at each other, unsure of how to react. They both felt stupid, they didn't even know what to say, and the silence between them was uncomfortable, way too uncomfortable, and Aaron decided to break it.

"Em… I'm sorry."

"No, I am, I shouldn't have acted the way I did"

"It's my fault too. We were both yelling at each other"

"We shouldn't have done that."

"You're right… I have to go back. Can we talk later?"

"Sure… Come to my place when you're done".

He smiled gently at her, put his hand on her arm, squeezing it gently, and then left. He was relieved, she didn't seem to hate him. She was relieved, he didn't seem to hold a grudge on her.

It was almost three in the morning when finally, the crisis was over. After spending hours looking for the two hostages, American soldiers had found them in a cave far away from everything, in on of the numerous deserts of Afghanistan. They had saved the 7-year-old girl, but her mother had been killed before they could intervene. It wasn't the first time Aaron, as National Security Adviser, was losing an American citizen, but it was always hard and all he wanted to do was lay on the couch of his office and close his eyes for the four hours he still had before starting another hectic day. But he had received a text from Emily, saying the door to her apartment was open and he could come whenever he wanted. He had to admit that after such a day, having someone to come home to was more than tempting, and he therefore decided to drive the ten minutes between the White House and Emily's apartment. Exhausted, he walked straight to her bedroom as soon as he arrived. Emily was sound asleep, and he lied down, wrapping an arm around her waist. She grunted, woken up by the movements in her bed.

"How did this end up?" she asked still half sleeping.

"We'll talk about it tomorrow. Sleep tight" he answered, already starting to doze off.

"I'm glad you're here…" she said, holding on to his hand around her waist.

Aaron felt relieved, it was good to have her, to have someone to come home to after such a strenuous day, and as soon as his eyes closed, he fell asleep.


	5. The Meeting

THE MEETING

A few months had passed since Emily & Aaron had started dating. It was the first time they had managed to get more than a day off together, and they had decided to travel down to Mexico to meet Aaron's parents. Of course, Emily was highly stressed for the official presentations. Aaron had already met her parents over a dinner when they had come down to Washington, but Aaron was in safe territory, in a city he knew by heart. Here, she wasn't. She had never set foot to Mexico before in her life and she had only basis in Spanish. She didn't like not being in control, and not being able to understand everything around her, so she didn't like being in a country where she couldn't understand everything. She knew most of Aaron's family was speaking English, but still, she didn't like the idea of not being able to communicate with people.

Over the past few months, things had gone smoothly. They both were happy with their relation, they had found a good rhythm between work and home, and were a better duo than they had ever been before. It had taken them a few weeks to tell the truth to the President about their relation, and it had been quite a hard step to take. They had been forced to do it after the rumor mill had started spinning in the hallways of the West Wing, and even though they knew it was none of Kirkman's business, they had wanted to make it official before the President would hear about it from someone else. The President had laughed, as if he already knew it, but had denied having heard about anything before. The rest of the White House staffers had learned about their relationship more or less in the same time, but nobody had been surprised. The chemistry between them had been obvious from the very first day, and even though they had fought a lot, everybody knew it was just bound to happen. Thankfully, they had not fought ever again at work, nor at home for that matters, and they were spending most of their nights together.

The drive between the airport in Mexico City and Aaron's hometown was a bit longer than two and a half hours, and they had rented a car to go there. Looking at the time, Emily could understand that they would arrive soon, and the pressure was rising. She was looking at herself in the mirror of the sun visor all the time, checking that her makeup was perfect, reapplying here and there a touch of powder or lipstick. She was constantly tapping her foot on the floor, sighing all the time.

"Em… Stop this, you are beautiful, don't worry about your makeup, it's perfect. And even without it, you are beautiful anyway." Aaron said, giving a quick look at her while driving.

He put his hand on her leg and stroked it gently. She sighed one more time.

"It's going to be fine. Come on, my family's no monster. I'm sure they'll love you. How could somebody hate you anyway !"

"You don't know that… How am I supposed to…"

"Don't worry. You'll be fine." he answered, interrupting her.

Aaron pulled in the driveway of his childhood home and gently kissed Emily before getting out of the car. He walked around it and opened the door for her to come out. He looked at her in the eyes as an encouragement, and smiled softly, reassuring her. _This was it_ she was thinking. Before they could reach the front door, they were welcomed by Aaron's parents, who greeted them both warmly.

"Mom, Dad, this is Emily Rhodes, my girlfriend." he said, proud to present Emily to his parents.

"Mrs. Shore, Mr. Shore, it's nice to meet you." Emily said, her voice quite unassured.

She was trying to hide her nervousness with the poker face she was wearing at the White House, but she knew it wasn't working well. She could feel herself blushing. And Aaron's mom enthusiasm wasn't helping.

"Come on, you're going to marry our son. Call me Adriana!' she said.

Aaron chocked, surprised by his mom's comment, and quickly stopped her.

"Mom!" he exclaimed. "We're not getting married! It's been three months… Please don't start scaring Emily like that…"

Adriana was so enthusiast she didn't seem to care. She was the perfect cliché of a Mama, very exuberant, enthusiastic, full of joy and pride for her son. On the contrary, Aaron's father, William, was more reserved, a very discreet man. Aaron's comment made him chuckle, and Emily blush even more than she thought was possible.

"Honey, Aaron… Come on, if you are presenting Emily to us, it means she's the right one. You know you're going to marry her someday…" Adriana added.

"Okay, enough. You're embarrassing them. Let's get inside, I'm sure you're tired, it's quite a trip to come from Washington." William cut Adriana short.

William was very poised and reassuring. Emily already felt she would like him. It was easier too, she felt in safe territory with him since he was American. He had grown at the border, on the "right side of the border" as he would usually say, speaking English and Spanish both as native languages. Aaron had told her that she could lean on William if ever she was overwhelmed or lost by Adriana's mix of Spanish and English. Aaron's mother was Mexican, and had lived her whole life in Mexico. It's only after meeting William that she had started learning, and speaking English. She was speaking it very well, and she had a lovely accent, rolling the R with every word she would say in English. But people tended to speak Spanish at home, and she would always fall back in her native language at one point or another. It was often a mix of Spanish and English that would come out of her mouth, sometimes even in the same sentence.

As they were walking inside the house, Emily raised an eyebrow toward Aaron, questioning him about what his mother had wanted to insinuate with her last comment. Aaron ignored Emily, embarrassed that his mom would already launch such a tricky topic, and he waved at her, as if he wanted to tell Emily to ignore his mom. Emily didn't say anything, but she knew she would come back to this when she would the chance.

Sitting at the kitchen island, Emily noticed all the cakes and other dishes Adriana had prepared. She was really a great mother. They all started talking about this and that, Adriana already questioning Emily about her life, her family and her job. Emily was eating her third piece of cake, she was more than full, but Adriana had already filled her plate with another one. Aaron was really uncomfortable, he was feeling bad for Emily, but he didn't really know how to stop his mom. He knew her, he knew how she was, and he knew nothing could stop her.

Since Aaron had moved to the US, he was back to Mexico a couple of times a year at best, and it was even worse since he had started working at the White House. Adriana missed him dearly, and every time he was back, she couldn't help but express her joy by inviting family, baking and speaking loudly, wanting to know everything about her son's life.

"I invited the family for dinner tonight by the way." Adriana said in the middle of a conversation.

Emily almost chocked on her piece of cake, not sure what it entailed, and Aaron put his fork back in his plate, calmly asking.

"What do you mean, exactly, by "the family"?"

"Well, your brother is coming with Eva and the kids. And I invited Aunt Maria, Aunt Paola, and Uncle Horacio is traveling down from the border too… Oh ! And Cesar is bringing Grandma Marisol…" Adriana answered, listing the whole side of her family, one by one.

"So you're basically telling me that you invited the whole Espinosa family for dinner tonight, and you didn't think of telling me before? Mom! Why?" Aaron exclaimed, half annoyed, half horrified.

"Because! It's not ever day you're coming back home, and especially with such a beautiful and charming woman like Emily!"

Emily suddenly felt oppressed as she realized she was trapped by Adriana. In less than six hours, she would meet half of Aaron's family, and she was in no way ready for that. She turned toward Aaron and stared at him, her look pleading for help. Aaron could feel her gaze on him and decided to stop the conversation.

"Okay. I guess we will talk about that later. We should bring our bags upstairs…" he said, raising from his seat and inviting Emily to do the same. "And I wanted to walk around the town with Emily before everybody arrives."

He didn't let his mother continue, and threw a death glare at her. He was really embarrassed, he didn't really know what to say to Emily. As soon as they were locked up in his childhood bedroom, he sat on his bed and sighed.

"I'm so, so, so sorry…" he started. "I know my mom always wants to invite family when I come back, but she outdid herself… And especially tonight, she could have waited. I feel like she set us up…"

Emily sat on the bed next to him, putting one hand on his leg and resting her head on his shoulder.

"Well, I guess it's just a big jump in the Shore family. Or Espinosa, if I heard right?" Emily answered, not really sure what to say.

"Yeah… Uncle Horacio is Nadia's dad."

"Right, that's what I figured…"

There was a blank, as Emily didn't really know what to say, and Aaron was still annoyed with his mother.

"Are you going to be okay? We can come back to D.C. if you want to. We don't have to…" Aaron started.

"Aaron…" Emily cut him short. "I know this isn't really what I had imagined, but don't worry. I'll be fine. I'm just not sure how I'll handle all of this, with the language and everything…"

"Don't worry about that, most of them can make at least casual conversation in English. They all learned it when my Dad entered the family."

"How sweet…" Emily said. "I guess they could probably learn it for me too now. Since apparently, we are getting married, right?" she teased.

"Of course, that didn't fall on deaf ears…" Aaron rolled his eyes.

Emily laughed at Aaron's embarrassment.

"Well, your embarrassment was very cute…" she chuckled.

"As if you weren't embarrassed either… Admit it." he answered, raising an eyebrow.

"I sure as hell admit it. I mean, I don't think we are quite that far yet. But obviously, your mom thinks otherwise."

"That might have to do with the fact that you are the first woman I present to my parents since I moved to the US… So basically, you're the second one."

"Second one?"

"Yeah, I had one girlfriend when I was in high school here, she was my first girlfriend, so you know what it is. And then I moved to the US. I had a couple of serious relations, but they never met my parents."

"So, I guess I should be honored?"

"Definitely…"

Aaron gently kissed Emily, and after a little while, they decided to take that tour of the town Aaron had promised. He showed her his primary school, his high school, his boxing club, the park where he had spent so many afternoon hanging around with friends. And then, they walked back to his parents' house, took their swimsuits and went to the beach. Aaron knew all the beaches around here, and he took her too the most beautiful and wild beach he could think of. There were not many people around, as it needed a ten-minute walk on a steep path to go down. But the sight was stunning. It was probably one of the most beautiful places Emily had ever been to and her eyes were shinning. They lied on their towels, enjoying the sun, talked and laughed. She shared her worries about meeting his family, and he reassured her.

"Don't you miss that sometimes?" Emily asked, referring to Mexico. "I mean, it's so peaceful and beautiful…"

"I do. But leaving for D.C. brought me where I am today. And it brought me to you…"

"Oh gosh… You're such a smooth talker…" she laughed.

Still lying on his towel, Aaron glanced at her. He contemplated what to do for a few seconds, and then stood up. Raising an eyebrow, Emily wondered what he was doing, but before she could say anything, he caught her and put her upside-down over his shoulder. Slowly, he walked to the water while Emily was screaming to let him down and hitting him with her fists. He laughed, because he was way too strong compared to her, and he knew she wouldn't get away from him like that. He threw her in the water, and she screamed once more.

"You're gonna pay for that!" she exclaimed.

He kissed her to be forgiven, and they spent some time in the water. They were on holidays, away from everything, and together. They only had a couple of days before they would come back to the cold busy city that they were calling home, and they intended to make the most of their first holidays together.


	6. The Move

THE MOVE

6 months in. Aaron and Emily had crossed the 6 months step and they were ready to celebrate that day. Aaron had reserved a table in one of the best and most romantic restaurant in town, and he had a precise idea of how he wanted the evening to end. He had an idea in the back of his mind, and was praying hard that no national security emergency would ruin it. It was the price to pay when working at the White House, he knew it could happen, but tonight was their night, and he intended to make the most of it.

Emily had managed to go home earlier than usual, and it was in itself a miracle. She was getting ready for her date with the man she had been proud to call boyfriend in the past 6 months. She couldn't really realize it had already been 6 months, time was flying. They were still spending most of their nights together, most of their days too, but she had come back to her place to prepare. She had found a beautiful dark blue dress that was suiting her figure perfectly. She was wearing a small cardigan to cover her bare shoulders. Doing her make-up, she was wiggling, dancing on the music. She was light-hearted, happy, and when she heard a knock at the front door, she giggled like a teenager. He wasn't usually knocking on the door, but he was determined to follow the rules by the book for their date. As she opened the door, her jaw dropped to see how handsome he looked. It wasn't that she had never seen him with a suit, work didn't give much of a choice, but he had outdone himself. He had something that she couldn't describe and that was making her heart melt. He had gelled his hair only slightly, keeping his curls visible, and that was what she probably loved the most in him. She opened the door wide to let him enter and he kissed her when he crossed the threshold.

"You are stunning. Didn't think you could be more stunning than you are everyday, but… woah." he said, in between two kisses.

"Thank you. You don't look so bad yourself." she answered.

"Shall we go? I almost want to undress you already… I would hate to miss our reservation."

"I'm starving, you wouldn't want your girlfriend to starve just because you are too eager to finish the evening?"

"Sure not."

He helped Emily with her coat, and they left for the restaurant. It was one of those fancy restaurants only the elite of Washington could afford, and Emily was quite impressed when she entered it. She wasn't really used to this kind of restaurants, and she had to say she was almost uncomfortable. It suddenly felt easier to sit at a table with the president of a big country or an ambassador, but Aaron had managed to get a private booth a bit apart for them to be more comfortable.

They had this rule not to talk about work, because it was already taking much of their time, so when they could, they wanted to avoid talking about it. But conversation was easy with them. It's not because they were not taking politics that they didn't know what to say. In the last few months, they had discovered that they had much more in common than they thought. And when dessert was served, Aaron started the conversation he had been waiting to start since the beginning of their date. He was stressed, his foot was tapping the floor, his voice almost strangled.

"Em, there is something I want to tell you…" Aaron started.

Emily could feel the shift in his tone, and she raised an eyebrow. The date had suddenly become more serious.

"Why do you sound so dramatic suddenly?" Emily asked.

"Nothing dramatic, don't worry." he answered.

He was fumbling in the pocket of his jacket, and took a key out of it. Putting it in front of Emily, he looked at her seriously, worried about what her answer would be.

"I want you to move in with me… Em."

He had imagined any kind of scenario, the ones in which she would say yes, the ones in which she would say no, but he had definitely not imagined the ones in which Emily would start laughing. Confused, he looked at her, waiting for her to say something. He could feel his heart starting to beat faster. She would say no, she was making fun of him, he could feel it. But against all odds, she started fumbling in her purse, and put a key on the table too.

"Great minds think alike? That's what we say right?"

Aaron sighed, relieved. She wasn't dumping him. For one second, he had really been scared that it was it, that he had moved too fast and that she was saying no.

"You scared me…" he said, rolling his eyes. "So I guess, that's a yes?"

"Of course it is."

She kissed him across the table and intertwined her fingers with his.

"I love you, you know that?" she continued.

"I know. I love you too."

"So, since we both are offering each other's key, we're gonna have to choose which apartment we want to live in then?" she asked.

"I guess so. But first things first. Let's go home."

"Yours or mine then ?" Emily chuckled.

"The closest…"

Aaron grinned and raised, inviting Emily to leave the restaurant. Before choosing, celebrations were in order.

Six weeks later, on a Sunday afternoon, Emily and Aaron were finally moving in together. It had taken a bit longer than they had expected, mostly because they had decided to find a new apartment together. With their work, it had taken a while before they could find the time to visit apartments and before they could find the right one. In the end, they had found a place within walking distance from work, which was in itself a miracle. It was weird for both of them to leave their own apartments, they had spent a lot of time in them. Aaron's apartment was like a bachelor pad, he had lived there ever since he had moved to Washington after graduating from college. It had been his first, and only appartement alone. He long had the money to move into a bigger apartment, but he loved where he was living. Emily was probably less attached to her apartment than he was. She had moved a lot since she had graduated, it was like she could never stay long in the same place. But still, they both knew that a new chapter of their lives was opening, a chapter they would write together. The first chapter of their life together.

It had also taken them a bit of time to buy new furniture. They had brought a few things from their own apartments, but had mostly bought new things, like a will to start their life together off on the right foot. Maybe it was just superstition, but they wanted a new start.

They had started moving things a few days ago, but this was the big day. They just needed to put up furniture, organize and clean up everything. Seth had come at one point to help. Kendra too. A couple of college friends from Emily and Aaron had come around too. Thanks to all of them, it had not been too hard to move, and it was now up to them to finish unpacking.

"Em… Can you come here a sec." Aaron called from the bedroom.

"Yeah?" Emily answered, leaning on the door frame.

"What do you think about the bed? It seemed good over there. But now that it's assembled, I wonder if it wouldn't be better on the other side of the room. Facing the window?"

"Yeah. I get why you would say that. Maybe we can just try it. Come on, I'll help you moving it. The fastest we finish, the quickest we can rest."

In the end, the bed was put facing the window, and most of the bedroom furniture were put up before the end of the night. Emily was mostly in charge of the decoration and tidying, while Aaron was assembling things that needed to be. For sure, they still had a lot of things to do, but they could live in it, and it was fine for them.

It's only after sunset that Aaron and Emily finally managed to sit on their couch and rest. A beer in their hands, Emily closed her eyes and rested her head on Aaron's shoulder. They were sweaty and exhausted, but they were finally home.

"Can you believe it?" she started.

"What?" he asked.

"This is it. It's our home. Not your place, not my place. Ours."

"Yep. We're sitting on our couch. In our living room. In our apartment. That sounds crazy, right?"

"Yeah. But I'm sure we'll get used to it pretty quickly."

Emily got closer to him, almost hugging him.

"You know I'm sweaty, right?" Aaron asked.

"Yeah. But we share everything now. Don't we?" Emily teased.

"Even our sweat ?" Aaron raised an eyebrow.

"And even the shower we can take together… In our bathroom…"

"And preserve water?"

Emily stood up and extended her hand for Aaron to take it.

"Exactly !"

Taking Emily's hand, he rose from the couch and kissed her gently. She tugged on his tee-shirt, helping him to take it off.

"Oh… I see. That's why you want to preserve water…" Aaron chuckled.

"To kill two birds with one stone… Right?"

Aaron chuckled, and they remained to kissing while starting to undress each other on their way to the bathroom.

"That's not where I thought we would christen our apartment, but… I won't complain."

"Don't worry babe, we have the whole evening for ourselves…"


	7. The Loss

THE LOSS

Emily had been sick every morning for the past few weeks. She knew why. She was pregnant. It was not making it more enjoyable to throw her guts every morning in the toilet, but there was a reason, and a good one. She was twelve weeks pregnant, and though it was not expected, she was getting used to it, and she could feel her maternal instinct kicking in. Every morning, after throwing up everything she could, she was rubbing her still flat belly and talking to the baby, asking if it could stop getting mommy sick every morning.

Aaron was over the moon with the idea of being a dad. Of course, their job was going to make it hard to survive, and it had been only a year they were together so he felt it was a bit early. But after the shock of the news, he had hugged tight Emily, and had even shed a tear of happiness. He could still remember the day like yesterday.

 _The door of the Chief of Staff was closed and Aaron and Emily were sitting on the couch of her office. They were having lunch like they usually did. It was their little break away from the reality of the job, and they were trying to do it as often as possible, even if it was less often that they actually would like it to. They had ordered Chinese from the take-out not far from the White House, but today, they were eating in silence. They could have heard a fly in the office, and Aaron knew something was wrong. Emily was never silent when everything was fine. It was weird, but he did not really know how to react because he did not want to confront Emily with that. Usually, when Emily did not want to say something, she needed some time alone for herself and he knew she would eventually tell him what was going on. He wasn't really worried though, it usually was minor things and he knew everything was still fine in their relationship, it was just the way she was. But it had already been two days, he was starting to wonder what was going on._

 _"Em… What is going on ?" Aaron asked softly, putting a hand on her thigh._

 _"Nothing hon', I'm just tired…" Emily avoided the answer._

 _"It's been two days you're just so quiet, I know sometimes you just need time to talk, but you're starting to worry me."_

 _Emily did not answer. She just sighed loudly and then started crying. Soft sobs at first, that became louder. Aaron took her in his arms and kissed softly her temple. He was rocking her back and forth just like a baby._

 _"Talk to me hon', talk to me" Aaron whispered._

 _Emily continued crying for a couple more minutes without being able to say anything. Then she tried to regain a bit of composure, and she sat up next to Aaron, cross-legged and facing him. She wiped the tears off her cheeks, took his hands in hers, and swallowed hard before talking._

 _"I was supposed to have my period last week. And it never came. So I took a test yesterday morning, and I am… pregnant" she said, looking straight into Aaron's eyes, hoping for any sort of reaction._

 _It took a while for Aaron to register what was going on. He was looking at her, but staring into space in the same time. He could hear Emily._

 _"Pregnant ?" he asked, needing confirmation on what she had said._

 _"Yes, I am pregnant."_

 _Suddenly, he saw his life pass before his eyes, going through thousands of emotions in the same time. He did not even know it was possible to have so many emotions conflicting in his mind. After a moment that seemed like hours for both of them, he started smiling and a tear fell down his cheek. He took Emily in his arms, hugged her tight and kissed her._

 _"This is amazing Em!"_

Of course, after that moment, they had talked a lot about their current situation, how early it was and if they could do it or not, what they would do with their jobs, when they would tell everyone.

Emily had confirmed the pregnancy with a medical appointment a week after, and they had decided to keep quiet about it until she would show. On this day, they were still the only two to know about it. They had debated longly whether they would tell their parents or not. Aaron had wanted to tell his parents, but he knew that as soon as his mother would know, she would tell everybody else. She couldn't held her tongue. So they had kept it their little secret, and even though they knew they wouldn't be able to keep it much longer, they had to say they enjoyed having some kind of privacy in this crazy world.

Of course, Emily, the caffeine-addict, had stopped drinking coffee, and that had raised suspicions. Every morning, she was bringing a mug of coffee at work, it was a well-known fact. So after two days "forgetting" her mug, the senior staffers had started questioning her. Since then, she had replaced coffee with smoothies or other juices that could boost her up but that didn't hold any caffeine. For everybody, she was still a coffee-addict, but Emily knew better, she could feel herself getting tired with every day passing without coffee.

This morning, Emily was sick again, and when Aaron woke up to the sound of her throwing up in the bathroom, he rose quickly to help her hold her hair and rub her back. He knew it was supposed to stop soon, and he was more than waiting for it to stop. It had been hard for her to wake up every morning like that, and he felt really bad for her. He was doing his best to soothe her, but he knew he couldn't do much about it.

After that terrible waking up, Emily managed to eat crackers for breakfast. It was mostly the only thing she could eat before 10 a.m., but she was thankful that she could at least swallow something. She knew many women couldn't eat a thing, so she felt blessed to be able to keep something in her stomach when going to work. In her office, she was hiding three packs of saltines, and if she had forgotten to refill her drawer, she knew that Aaron would have thought about it. It was weird, because she wasn't the type of person eating savory things, but since she was pregnant, she couldn't stand eating sweet treats anymore.

Emily and Aaron were in a meeting with the ambassador of Russia over a dispute in the Bering Strait when she started feeling it. It was just a little twinge in her belly, like a very small cramp. She had already felt it a couple of times, so she didn't worry much. Her doctor had told her it could be normal, especially since she was often tired and overworking. He had also told her to take it slow, but Emily was way too committed to her job to listen to that. Aaron was concerned, he could see that she wasn't taking things slow, he could see that she was getting easily exhausted. So even if she was attending all the meetings not to raise suspicions, Aaron had forced her to handle him things so she could rest, especially paperwork. She didn't like that, pregnancy wasn't an illness and she was determined not to let it impinge on her life.

So she took time to breath slowly, in and out deeply, and she took a sip of water. The pain faded and everything went back to normal. After the meeting though, she went straight to her office to drink a full bottle of water and lean on her desk, breathing deeply. Taking her jacket off, she was wondering why she felt so warm today, and she hoped that it was just the hormones talking, not that she was getting sick.

She was taking a call when Aaron knocked at her door, worried about her. He had seen that she wasn't feeling well during the meeting, so he wanted to check on her. But as she was walking around her desk to sit in her chair, Aaron noticed a small red stain on her skirt. His eyes grew wide, and he walked quickly to her, forcing her to end the call.

"Em, are you feeling alright?" Aaron asked worried.

"Yeah I'm fine. What is going on? I just had a little weakness in the meeting, but you know it can happen, I'm feeling fine." she said rising again to close the distance between them.

But when she started walking, she felt something wet running down her legs. A new twinge hit her, stronger this time, and she almost lost her balance, surprised. Aaron quickly caught her and they both looked down where her beige skirt was getting red from blood. She felt another twinge, stronger than the last ones, and it made her fall on her knees.

"Emily! Emily! Oh my God Em!" Aaron started screaming.

He held her tight as she was losing consciousness in his arms. His heart was beating fast, he didn't know what to do, what to say. His voice caught Seth's attention who was walking by Emily's office, and when he walked in, he saw Emily on the floor and Aaron holding her, panicking.

"What is going on?" he asked, running toward them.

"Please, call an ambulance" Aaron pleaded. "She's pregnant."

Seth opened his eyes wide at the revelation and reacted quickly, grabbing his phone to call an ambulance. Holding Emily's hand, he also called the medical service of the White House for them to take care of the Chief of Staff while they were waiting for an ambulance. He was shaking her hand, hoping it would wake her up, event though he knew it wouldn't.

"Nobody knows." Aaron said, his desperate look on Seth. "Oh my God she's losing the baby."

Aaron was panicking, he was completely panicking. He had lost total control of himself and was starting to cry, realizing what was happening. He had probably never panicked like that ever before, it wasn't his type. But the woman he loved was losing their baby. Suddenly, other people started entering Emily's office. Some were truly concerned, but others were just curious, and Seth rose to make everybody leave the room, while the medical service was coming to take care of Emily.

A few hours later, she woke up in a very uncomfortable bed in a white room. It took time for her to realize where she was, but suddenly, everything hit her. Aaron, exhausted from crying and who had fallen asleep next to her, woke up to her sobs. He quickly sat on the bed, on her side, and took her in his arms. She knew, she had understood what had happened, and they were both crying in silence, mourning the little part of them that had lost. Their hearts were broken and in that moment, they did not know how they would get over this, or even if they just could get over this.

"Is this real? Did I really lose the baby?" Emily asked, still crying.

"Yes, we did." Aaron answered, still holding her tight in his arms.


	8. The Distress

THE DISTRESS

Emily went back to work only 3 days after her miscarriage. She was faking it, wearing her poker face and acting strong, but deep inside she was broken in thousands of pieces. Two weeks after her miscarriage, work was her only obsession and she was coming earlier and leaving later than before. Coffee was her drug and she was drinking it like water. A death glare was the answer to anyone who pitied her, and she was biting like a bulldog anyone who did not agree with her. The first day after her return to work, she had had a big break down in front of the whole White House staff. Tired of feeling everyone's pity and looks of sympathy, she had yelled at everybody in the hallway leading to her office that they should mind their own business and go back to work.

Everybody had tried to talk to her, but in vain. Tom Kirkman, the man that she had sometimes considered her father had wanted to force her to stay at home longer, but even he had had the misfortune to talk to a wall. Seth, her best friend, had tried too. One day, he had closed the door of her office and made her sit on the couch to talk about it. She had looked at him and asked him to mind his own business. She had not even talked to her parents about it. She had had a call from her mom, but since she had not even been aware of the pregnancy at first, she had decided she wouldn't say anything about the miscarriage neither.

Aaron was a wreck, but on the contrary to his other half, he was showing it. It wasn't his intention, he wasn't asking for anyone's pity, but he was hurt. They had lost their baby, and Emily was so icy with him that it was hard to come home every night to a woman that was barely talking to him. Of course, she was grieving too, he knew that. But he wished that they could talk, go through this together. Every night when she was going to bed, she was staying on her side of the bed, and far enough so that Aaron would not touch her. It was paining him so much that a knot was forming in his stomach every evening when he had to come home. They were not even going back home together anymore. Aaron had tried to wait for her, but after two nights of being kicked out of her office, he had given up.

It was only 11 a.m. but Aaron was already drinking his first whisky of the day. He was sitting in his chair in his office, reading a report on an incident that had happened two days ago. Seth knocked at the door and entered. At first, Aaron thought that it was work related, but seeing his friend closing the door and sitting in the chair in front of him made him understand it wasn't.

"Do you need to talk?" Seth asked

"What do you want me to talk about?" Aaron answered.

"Anything. Everything. Starting by why the hell you are drinking scotch at 11 a.m. at work on a Wednesday?"

Aaron's answer was to take another glass out of his drawer and poured whisky in. He offered it to Seth who didn't refuse.

"Ok, talk man. I see you want to." Seth insisted.

"Emily is barely even talking to me anymore. I know she is grieving, but I am too. She doesn't come home in the same time than me, she sleeps on the other side of the bed, she yells at people and doesn't stand me touching her, or me taking her in my arms. It's been two weeks. And she hasn't shed a tear since that day. She is faking it. I know she is hurt. But I cannot stand her ignoring me anymore."

"Man… You need to talk to her."

"If only she was talking to me."

"I've never been through this, I know I can't understand, but I'm sure time will make the difference. Feel free to talk to me whenever you want. You know you can come by my office whenever you need. You're not the only one hiding a bottle in the lower drawer of your desk…"

Seth's last comment made Aaron chuckle slightly. Seth always had the right comment to lighten the mood, and Aaron was grateful for that.

"How are you holding up? Personally I mean." Seth asked.

"I think that this glass of scotch pretty much sums it up all."

Seth did not answer and just drank a sip of his own glass.

"I just feel like there is something I could have done, a reason why we lost the baby, I just need an explanation. This baby wasn't planned, but we would have made it, it was half her, half me, it was just us. We could have done it."

Aaron finished his glass of whisky and poured a new one.

"Slow down man, we never know what happens in this building. I'd like you to be sober to deal with a potential national security crisis."

"Yeah you're right. Drink it for me." Aaron answered, putting the glass in front of the Press Secretary.

Seth declined and left the office, explaining that he had a press conference a few minutes later. The rest of the day went by the same pace. Aaron had Emily had had lunch together, but sitting each at one end of the couch. For once, they had talked business, it had seemed like the only thing they could talk about. In the evening, Aaron had once again come home alone, eaten dinner alone, and had gone to bed alone.

Emily was pushing back the time when she would go home. It was already 11:30 p.m. but she didn't want to come back home. She had never been that ahead on her work, and she was still finding things to do. She finally left the office a bit before 1 a.m., and sighed loudly before entering their apartment. She didn't want to see him, or talk to him. She couldn't handle it. She knew she would cry, and she couldn't afford the luxury to cry. She couldn't wallow, she didn't have time for that, so building walls had been the easiest option. She had seen him, she had seen how hurt he was, but she had a country to save first and it was her only goal for now. Her personal life could wait, and after all, Aaron could understand that, he was saving the country everyday too.

Emily went straight to bed after changing to her nightgown and brushing her teeth. She was exhausted and was hoping to fall asleep as soon as her head ended up on the pillow. But suddenly, Aaron turned around in the bed, and in an instinctive movement, wrapped an arm around her. She felt her breath being taken away. She couldn't breathe anymore, she was suffocating. She was feeling trapped in her feelings and pain. She tried not to move, not to panic, but it was too much. She started breathing rapidly and pushed him away with all the strength she had and ran toward the bathroom. She slammed the door and let herself slide against the wall. She was in tears, she couldn't stop crying, it was just too much and she could feel herself panicking.

Of course, she had woken up Aaron in her rush toward the bathroom, and he tried to understand what was happening. He slowly stood up and walked toward the bathroom, where he knocked to enter. He could hear her cry, and though it was paining him, he was relieved that she was finally allowing herself to grieve properly. She did not answer him, so he decided to enter the bathroom anyway. He walked toward her and he squatted down in front of her. At first, he didn't say anything, he wasn't sure what he should do. He showed her his hands in an offer to hold them, and waited for her to take them. She finally did, and he started speaking.

"Em, talk to me please"

"What do you want me to say? Nothing that you already know. I hate myself, I lost our baby. I should have listened to the doctor, I should have taken it slow, I should have been more careful with my rhythm, my food, my drinks. I should have stayed home more often and slept more. Everything is my fault. It's all my fault and I hate myself for this. I cannot stand looking at you anymore, or touching you, everything in you makes me feel that I killed our baby."

Aaron started crying at the revelation. He couldn't even imagine what she was going through. Not one second he had imagined that she would feel responsible for the miscarriage. He was abashed, shocked, there were no words to describe what he could feel when she told her. Tears started running down his cheeks and his voice broke when he started to speak.

"Honey, YOU did not loose the baby. WE did. It wasn't your fault. It never was and it never will be. Our lives are crazy. Our jobs are crazy. This baby wasn't even in our plans. We were not prepared for that, and maybe there are things that we should have done and we didn't, but we will never know that, and I cannot let you say that this is your fault or that you killed our baby. You had a miscarriage, it happens to so many women in the world, whatever their job, their life, their health condition. It happens. It's been two weeks I try to find a logical explanation to this, but there isn't. I realized today that there is no logical explanation. It just happens. We were not lucky enough to see this baby come to the world, but it isn't your fault."

Aaron kneeled and took her in his arms. Her cries doubled in intensity and he started rocking her. He needed that too, and the rocking made them both feel a bit better. They did not say anything else for the next ten minutes, just being finally in each other's arms was enough. At one point, Aaron stood up and helped her to stand up too. He cupped her face in his hands and kissed her gently.

"We won't go to work tomorrow. We need to rest." he declared.

And with that, they went back to bed, this time, hugging each other tight.


	9. The Commitment

A little part of the chapter, right at the beginning, is **rated M**. You are warned ;)

* * *

THE COMMITMENT

One year, eleven months and four days. Emily was still counting, even if she knew that at one point she wouldn't be able to anymore. That morning, she had woken up earlier than usual, and she was in a good mood. Her man was still sleeping when she decided to prepare coffee for both of them, and she went back to bed with two hot mugs of coffee, one for each of them. The smell of coffee and the kiss on his lips woke up Aaron, and he had to say that he was more than happy with such a morning call. It was much better than being woken up by a call of national security at three in the morning. He sat up in the bed, his head resting against the headboard, and started drinking his coffee while Emily laid on his chest. He was in love, if someone had told him two years ago that he would be here, with this beautiful, smart and strong woman in bed, he would have laughed. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with Emily Rhodes, he wanted her to be called Emily Rhodes-Shore, he wanted to make love to her every day and he wanted to have kids with her.

"You should do that more often Em, I have to say that it is pretty enjoyable to wake up like that" he said.

"Well, you're just lucky cause I woke up earlier than usual and I was in a mood to bring you coffee to bed. I am also in a mood for other things if you see what I mean…" Emily answered playfully.

"I"m not sure I see what you mean…" Aaron smirked. "Maybe you should show me…"

Emily put her coffee back on her nightstand and sat on Aaron's lap, facing him. She leaned toward him and kissed him gently on the lips, then went down in his neck. She sucked gently on it but stopped before she could make a mark, it wasn't really professional to show such a mark in the West Wing. Aaron put his own mug on the nightstand and put his hands on Emily's hips. He kissed her gently and laid her on the bed, him on top of her.

"Why do you always have to be on top?" Emily said playfully.

"Because it's the only place where I can boss you around" Aaron laughed.

Aaron's comment made Emily laugh and they resumed to kissing. Aaron's hand went down under Emily's nightgown and stroked gently her legs before caressing her ass. His mouth went down to her pussy, kissing through her panties, and he slowly went back up, tracing a path from her belly button to her lips and pulling up her nightgown in the same time. After taking it off, his mouth went down to one of her nipple and started sucking on it. Emily let out a breath of contentment and started pulling on the white tee-shirt he wore. She loved this tee-shirt, he looked handsome in it and she loved seeing it on him every night, but right now she had a desperate need to take it off. She took advantage of the moment to push down his legs the night pants he was wearing, and his underwear fell along with them. He was already so hard, he wanted her more than anything and he knew he would sooner rather than later. She caressed his length and it made him hold his breath. One of his hands slid down between her panties and her pussy and he slid a finger between her folds. He quickly stroked her clit and went down to insert a finger in her pussy. Emily was trying to control her respiration, but she was already so wet and it felt so good that she couldn't suppress a moan. It didn't last long before Aaron stopped what he was doing and slid her panties off her legs. He aligned himself with her and started entering her slowly. He went as deep as he could and back, slow and gentle, and Emily put her arms around his neck. She pulled him toward her and kissed him, she bit his lower lip. Both of them wanted to take it slow, they were not in the mood for wild sex, they were just making love.

Two hours later, they were at work and for once, the day was pretty slow. No ambassador to deal with, no subpoena, no military crisis. Nothing but usual work, and it felt good. It had been a while days had not been that slow. Emily was in a meeting with the President in the Oval Office. They were planning their next health care bill, and even though Emily was confident with it, they had to secure it.

Aaron was having an even slower day compared to Emily, and managed to escape from the West Wing for a little bit. It was now or never, it wasn't everyday he had time to do this, and it had been on his mind for quite some time now. So he walked into the jewelry's store on the main shopping avenue of D.C, gathering his courage and crossing the threshold of the store. He had heard about this store a while ago when an old college friend had invited him to his wedding, and he knew he had great tastes, so he hoped he would find what he wanted. Soon enough, he was taken care of by a sales assistant who showed him different rings. He knew what he wanted. One of those single diamonds that she could show to everyone, something that would catch everybody's attention, something simple but stunning, just like her. He had even managed to steal one of Emily's ring to have her size. It had not been the easiest part, Emily was never leaving home without rings. He had observed for quite a while and had stolen the one that she was wearing the less often.

With that, he was back at the White House within the hour, a small box in his suit. He hid the box in his drawer and locked it. There wasn't a chance Emily would come and take anything from his desk, so he thought it was better than hiding it at home. He was hoping to ask her soon, but he wanted to be sure that everything was planned before. Of course, planning things with their unpredictable jobs would be hard, but he knew it would be perfect.

It took a bit more than two weeks for Aaron to organize everything and find the right time to do this. He had even involved Seth in the preparation of all of this. Even if Seth was friend with both of them, he knew he could trust him not to tell Emily anything about it. One day, he had closed the door of Seth's office and had told him all about his plan. Seth was ecstatic about his two best friends getting married. He had been one of the firsts to know about Aaron and Emily's relation, but he had also probably been one of the firsts to know it was bound to happen, that they would end up together one day.

So one evening, Aaron and Emily were going back home after a quiet day, but instead of driving home, Aaron drove the opposite way.

"Where are you going? You know home isn't this way, right?" Emily stated, surprised.

"I know, but I want to show you something first." Aaron answered.

"Why are you so secretive suddenly?" she asked, intrigued by his behavior.

"Why do you sound suspicious suddenly?" he replied, smirking.

Aaron drove for several minutes before parking in the middle of nowhere, right on the Potomac River. Emily was still curious, she couldn't understand what was going on, it was just really weird for Aaron to do this, to be so secretive.

"Aaron, what are you doing?"

"Come with me…"

He got out of the car and walked around to open her door. He took her hand and led her in a cosy area by the river. It was a summer day, but it was getting late and dark. He knew that they would probably arrive late, so he had asked Seth to come by before and plug in the fairy lights that Aaron had set up in the morning. Still holding her hand, he walked in the middle of this area, with an Emily completely stunned by the place. Seth had also put a blanket on the floor and brought a picnic basket for dinner. It was exactly the way he wanted it to be: Romantic, private and cosy.

"What is all that Aaron?" Emily asked, confused.

"I just wanted to surprise you." Aaron answered and kissed her.

It was the moment. Aaron sighed to give himself courage and put one knee on the floor. His heart was pounding, he was stressed. He was making the declaration of his life. Emily's eyes went wide when she finally realized what was happening. Her heart started racing and she put her hand on her mouth even before he popped the question. He took the little box that was hidden in his suit, and opened it in front of Emily.

"Emily Claire Rhodes, will you marry me?"

Emily let a tear fall down her cheek.

"Yes! Yes!" she answered, bouncing on her feet.

Aaron slid the ring on her finger and rose, taking her in his arms. He kissed her tenderly, fiercely, with all his heart. He was the happiest man in the world. His heart was beating fast. She had said yes, she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him, and this was the best day of his life.

"I love you so much Em."

"I love you too."

Emily couldn't realize what had just happened. Emotions were running high, she let a tear of happiness fall down her cheek. The ring was the most stunning jewel she had every seen. She was so lucky, she would spend the rest of her life with the man she loved more than anything.


	10. The Rumor

THE RUMOR

 _"SCANDALOUS !_

 _Emily Rhodes, White House Chief of Staff, was seen today with a big and bright diamond on her left hand. Did the President give it to her? It's been said that they have been involved for quite a while now. What about Alex Kirkman? Is she still in the game or is this wedding off? Insiders tell everything:_

 _She is only 34 but still, she is the most influential woman in the White House. No wonder when you know that she has been secretly dating the president for years. Yes, she has. Everybody in Washington thinks she is dating Aaron Shore, the National Security Adviser, and it's true they have been playing along very well. Caught in a restaurant late at night, or walking into the same apartment building. But this is just a cover, and we can prove it. Aaron Shore was sacked from the job she is currently holding a few years ago, and sources familiar with the case say that he never forgave her. Playing along is just part of his new job, and when he accepted to come back to the White House, he accepted this role too._

 _Rumor has it Emily Rhodes had a miscarriage a little over a year ago. She was already involved with the President._

 _And this ring? No, this isn't an engagement ring from Aaron Shore, just like they would like us to think. This is a gift from Tom Kirkman. Let's just hope he didn't pay it with public money…_

 _So, what about Alex Kirkman? Does she know? Yes. Why is she staying? Because she is the First Lady, and First Ladies don't go. How did she react, when she discovered that the woman she once considered her daughter had become her husband's lover? Not well. This is why she left for Camp David with their kids, Leo and Penny, a few years back. Why did she come back? To keep up appearances._

 _Still, plenty of questions need to be answered. Be sure we won't left them unresolved._

The Washington Talk had written an article about Emily, and it was a piece of shit. More specifically, Trevor McDoyle, was a piece of shit. They had lost their accreditation a while back and been kicked out of the pool after another fake article, and since then, they were getting revenge every time they could. So when Emily had arrived at work with this big beautiful diamond, two days ago, she knew something would come out. But she didn't think it would be that bad. She didn't care, it had absolutely no effect or her. But this time, they had hit hard and it seemed that a lot of people were believing them. Sure, this was offending her that someone could even imagine her having an affair with Tom Kirkman, but she knew better and knew this would blow off soon.

What she couldn't get though was why people inside the White House would believe this article. Everybody knew they were a piece of shit, and everybody knew she was with Aaron. This had never been a secret. Of course, they weren't exposing themselves, kissing or holding hands at work, but everybody knew. So why believe The Washington Talk? But she had been looked at weirdly this morning when she had arrived at work, and she could hear gossips in the hallway when people were passing in front of her door.

Aaron burst into Emily's office with the newspaper in his hand.

"Did you see this piece of shit?" he asked angrily

"I did" Emily answered calmly.

"And this is all it does to you?" Aaron was so pissed he could not understand how she could keep her calm

"I don't care. Just like you said, it's just a piece of shit" Emily was just indifferent to the article.

"You do realize that they are saying you have an affair with Kirkman right? And that you should not be Chief of Staff? And how the hell did they learn about your miscarriage?" Aaron was so angry.

He sat on the couch of her office and threw the newspaper on the table in front of him. Emily stood up and walked toward him. She sat on the coffee table in front of him and hold his hands.

"Aaron. I don't give a shit about this paper. You know them. They are angry about losing their accreditation, and nobody believes a single line of what they are writing. I actually don't even know how they still have readers."

"I cannot believe that you don't care"

"I believe that you are pissed they think so little of you."

"Damn straight I am! Emily! They are reducing you to a common whore and me to a dumbass puppet!"

"Aaron, you know this will blow off as quickly as it came up…"

"I'm just pissed."

"I know. But you put a ring on your girl, that's all that matters, isn't it?"

"Yeah…"

Emily kissed him quickly and went back behind her desk where she was filling papers for a meeting coming up. Aaron looked at her working for a little bit, and then decided to come back to his office, he also had work to do.

Later in the afternoon, the daily press briefing was about to start and Emily decided to go, as she was often doing, to listen to what Seth was saying. But before she could enter the room, she was jumped over by reporters coming to her to ask about The Washington Talk's article. _"Is it true?" "Are you going to step aside?" "What does Alex Kirkman think about it?"_ She was surrounded by hungry journalists, and only Seth's intervention, threatening them to cancel the briefing, made them go away. Emily ran back to her office and locked herself in it, deciding to watch the briefing live from her office. Seth really had a hard time holding them, they couldn't stop coming back with questions about Emily's alleged affair. Rolling her eyes, she tapped her fist on her desk, annoyed that such a stupid article could ruin a full day of business. When she saw Seth leaving the briefing, she opened the door of her office and caught him on his way to his own office.

"We need to write a statement." Emily started

"I know" Seth answered angrily.

"What do you want to say?"

"I don't know"

"Is that all you have to say?"

"I guess so"

"Seth?"

"Emily!" he exclaimed, playing along with her. "Can you help me one this one? It's your life, not mine…"

"Seth, what do you want me to say? That the Washington Talk is a trash paper? We all already knew that… I don't know, say that you deny everything that they have made up, that yes I am really engaged, that no, the President and I don't have an affair, that my private life will stay private. I mean, it's not the first time you're doing that? Is it?"

"No, but it is the first time it involves two friends…"

Emily grinned. She knew they were friends, she could tell it, but they were never really saying it, and she loved that she could count on him like that. He had been the only one aware of Aaron and Emily's relationship from the beginning. Both Aaron and Emily knew they could come talk to Seth whenever they needed, and that they could tell him everything.

"What? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Nothing…" Emily avoided to answer. "Go talk to Lyor. He's the one who knows what to do. He's gonna know what to say."

"Yeah, I'm surprised he hasn't said anything yet."

"Speaking of the devil…" Emily asked, seeing the political director arrive in their direction…

"Guys, you need to do something about this article!" Lyor exclaimed, walking toward them.

"Yes, we know." Seth answered.

"You're the guy for this, Lyor. I let you handle this with Seth. Just please, don't give them anything about Aaron and I. They don't need to know…" Emily commanded.

"Sure…" Seth and Lyor nodded.

It was the end of the day, but Seth had called back the press for a short briefing. They had written a statement and were distributing it while he was walking in the room.

"Ladies and gentlemen, good evening. I'm sorry we called you back this late, but this couldn't wait tomorrow. You will be able to read the statement later, but we wanted to make a few things clear before. This is the first, and the last time, that the White House is commenting on the private life of an adviser to the President. This statement obviously denies everything, since nothing is true. Let me remind you that if The Washington Talk is not here with us tonight, there is a reason. They lost their accreditation, and every single one of you in this room knows why. On a personal note, I have to say that I am very disappointed that you could believe even one word of what is coming out of this paper. Miss Rhodes' relation has never been hidden, so I don't get why you would believe such an article, especially you, who work in the White House, and see Miss Rhodes every single day. This is all for tonight, I'm not taking any question. Good evening."

The crowd in front of him started yelling to ask questions, as they would always do, even if they knew he wouldn't answer them. Leaving the press room, he walked to Emily's office, where she was waiting for him with Aaron, watching the press briefing.

"Aaaaaaand. It's done. Thank you, thank you, thank you" Seth exclaimed, curtsying as if he deserved an award.

"Come on, man. You just did your job…" Aaron said, rolling his eyes.

Emily gently tapped Aaron on the shoulder.

"Aaron!" she exclaimed. "Thank you Seth, we owe you one" Emily said, turning to the Press Secretary, grateful.

"Why didn't you set the record straight? You could have told them Emily and I are engaged…" Aaron started pouting.

Seth and Emily started laughing out loud. Aaron looked at both of them, confused. He pouted even more and it was like a vicious circle, Emily and Seth couldn't stop laughing anymore.

"What?" Aaron said, starting to be mad.

"I told you…" Emily smirked at Seth.

"Again! What?" Aaron crossed his arms, pissed.

"Ohhhh. Come on man, we're just making fun of you. Emily told me you were jealous from not getting the attention you deserve…"

"I'm not!" Aaron exclaimed

"You are…" Seth and Emily answered in the same time.

Aaron rolled his eyes once more, and Emily offered a drink to her two colleagues before they would head home. Days like this were always exhausting, but it was always making them laugh to see how stupid the press could sometimes be. What would they do without the press...


	11. The Fear

Inspired by 2x08.

* * *

THE FEAR

Aaron and Emily had been home for the last couple of hours, and they were preparing dinner while chatting. Aaron was stressed, he needed to talk to Emily, but he knew she wouldn't like it. He had known what he needed to tell her for the whole day, but he couldn't manage to do it. He knew he had to. He was leaving tomorrow morning, but he didn't know how to tell her. She would be upset, and she would start to freak out, and she would try to convince him not to go. He already knew that, and he didn't want to hurt her. He took his courage in both hands and started talking.

"Em… There is something I need to tell you" he gulped. He was sitting around the kitchen island while she was stirring what was cooking.

"Hum?" she did answered, not really paying attention.

"I'm going to Afghanistan with Kirkman"

Emily dropped the wooden spoon she had in her hand and turned her body toward Aaron.

"No you're not" she answered.

"Yes I am. I asked Kirkman not to put me on the list because I did not want you to learn it on a bit of paper."

"This is a joke right? It's April fool in November?"

"It's not a joke Em. Kirkman asked me, and of course I said yes, I'm the National Security Adviser, it's normal for me to go there"

"You cannot go there. You just cannot do it." Emily started to freak out.

"Em… I'm not going hiking in the mountains of Afghanistan. I'm going in a military camp, with maximum security, and I won't be alone"

"But I don't care about all of that Aaron, you're going in a war zone!" Emily raised her voice

"Em… The whole Capitol blew up not so long ago, and we were not in a war zone. I'll be as safe there as I am here with you."

"Aaron! You know it's not the same!" Emily whined.

Aaron stood up from his chair and walked around the kitchen island to stand in front of Emily. He put his hands on her arms, holding her still.

"Look at me Em, I'll be safe, I'll have a bullet-proof vest on me all the time. And we won't stay long anyway. I'll be gone for two days. No more."

"I don't want you there Aaron, it's too risky. What am I going to do if something happens?" Emily could feel her tears coming to her eyes.

"Nothing will happen. I'm sure of it"

"How? How can you be sure of it?"

"I just know it, deep in my heart, I know it because I love you and I'll come back marry you just like I told you two months ago."

He hugged Emily tight and kissed her, stroking her back as a way to reassure her.

A few hours later, Emily was tossing in their bed. She couldn't sleep, every single time she was closing her eyes, she could see Aaron being blown up by a bomb. The scene was replaying non stop in her head, and she did not know what to do to forget it. She did not want to wake him up, he was sleeping peacefully next to her, but she couldn't stop tossing either. She had a lump in her throat, so she stood up and walked to the kitchen to take a sleeping pill. She had received a prescription after the Capitol bombing but she had not used all of them, and since then, she was keeping them locked for terrible nights like this one. She heard Aaron's alarm-clock ringing, and she looked at the time. 2:00 a.m. He had to be at the White House in an hour. She saw him coming from the bedroom, not really awake and surprised to see her in the kitchen.

"What are you doing here?" he asked

"I couldn't sleep."

He walked toward her and kissed her forehead. He started making coffee.

"Did you even sleep?" he asked groggily

"I can't, every time I close my eyes, I see you, and you don't want to know how it ends up" Emily answered

"You know you're gonna have to sleep in the next two days, right? And that I won't be able to call you?"

"I know. I'll try."

"Go to bed, I'll kiss you goodbye when I'm ready to leave."

Emily hugged tight Aaron, inhaling his smell one more time before he had to leave, and did as told. She walked back to their bed, the pill she had taken had already kicked in and she fell asleep pretty quickly. As promised, Aaron kissed her goodbye when he left, but she did not even realize it.

The day following Aaron's departure had been pretty slow at the White House, and except for Seth's stupid behavior with his brother, nothing important had happened. What had taken them most of the time was hiding the President's trip to Afghanistan and it wasn't that easy. Their plan was to keep the reporters in the dark until the President would take off from Afghanistan and be back to the U.S., but of course, everybody was speculating.

In the early evening, Emily was about to leave the White House when a breaking news report popped on her phone. There had been an attack on a military camp in Afghanistan. Emily's heart skipped a beat and she ran to Seth's office to know more about it.

"Did you see?" she asked entering his office without knocking.

"I saw, and they say that Kirkman was there, so our cover is over, everybody knows he is there and that we sent our President in a war zone" Seth answered

"Seth!" Emily almost yelled. "I never thought I would say that one day, but I don't give a shit about what the press knows or doesn't know right now! Do you have more info?"

"I don't. You should go down to the command ops to know more. You know I don't have clearance to go."

Emily breathed heavily and walked back from where she was coming, walking to the elevator. She knew he shouldn't have gone there, she knew it. She was silently pissed at everyone, stressed in the same time. She had advised Kirkman not to go there, and she didn't want Aaron to go there either. She knew it was too risky, and now she was dealing with things she did not want to deal with. She was the White House Chief of Staff, but she suddenly didn't know what to do anymore, or who to ask. Her mind was focused on her fiancé and the nightmares she had had the previous night. She was shaking, her legs were barely holding her anymore. She closed her eyes one instant, sighed and pushed at the back of her mind any terrible thought. She needed to stay professional.

Arriving in the command ops, she realized that the Joint Chiefs didn't know much more than anyone else. They could confirm what CNN had said. Yes, the military camp where Kirkman was, and therefore Aaron, had been attacked by an armed group, but no, they couldn't reach anyone there and didn't have information on the Presidential convoy. They were hopeful to have news from them soon, but it was still too early to know if anyone had been injured. This lump in her throat that she had the night before was coming back. She didn't know how long she would be able to keep her composure. She stayed a bit longer down in command ops, but nobody could tell her anything, so she walked back upstairs to Seth's office to find him and Lyor waiting for updates.

"I need to keep myself busy. I don't know, we need to do something. We need to write a statement." she exclaimed.

"What? Why ? We don't even know what is going on?" Seth answered, surprised.

"But the press knows Kirkman is over there. The longer we wait…" she continued.

"She's right." Lyor answered. "But Seth is right too. We cannot say anything as long as we don't know if Kirkman is alive. We would look like amateurs. That is the last thing we need, especially since we did not warn them about Kirkman's trip. I told you…"

But Emily wasn't listening anymore. She cut him short in his rambling.

"So what do we do? Cause I don't know what to do…"

She was starting to freak out again. She could feel her heart beat fast and tears starting to come up. This wasn't like her, she wasn't freaking out at work, she was always composed and serious. But this was Aaron, the love of her life. Without a warning, Seth walked to her and hugged her. He knew his friend, he could get what was going on in her head.

"Emily. He's gonna be okay. News will come soon, and he's going to be fine." he said, still hugging her.

"How do you know?" Emily asked, sniffing.

"Come on, we're talking about Aaron. Aaron badass Shore. Like, the guy you're going to marry. That guy can go through everything."

Seth's last comment made Emily chuckle slightly. She knew he was right, Aaron would be okay, there was no other possible way. He had to be okay. Her phone started ringing, and she was called back into command ops. She left her colleagues in a hurry and ran back downstairs. They had finally been able to reach Afghanistan, and news were reassuring. Everybody was safe, and on their way back to the United States. After the attack, the visit had been shortened, and she would see Aaron earlier than planned. It seemed that it was just a coincidence that Kirkman was there during the attack, and that it had been planned before Kirkman had arrived there. That was a good thing, because it meant that nothing had been leaked about the President's trip to Afghanistan. Everybody was relieved. No one was dead. Some people had been injured, but nothing serious, and only soldiers who had defended the base. Going back up to finally write that statement with Seth and Lyor, a tear escaped as she was fighting not to totally lose it. Her fiancé was safe, and she couldn't even describe how relieved she was. Still, she had not seen him yet, and she would be fine only when he would be back on U.S. soil, with her, at home. But he was fine, and that was a first step.

Sitting in Seth's office, they looked at each other, wondering what to say to the press. They knew it would be a hard one to swallow. They needed to temper things, because they had deliberately kept the truth from the press, and they didn't like this. Lyor knew it had been a bad idea. He had been rambling about it since it had been decided that the President would go. And now, he was rambling about the fact that he was right. Truth is, he was a great political director, he knew what to do, when to do it and how to say it. He knew what would look good and what would look bad. He knew how to handle things. But the one that was the most pissed tonight was Seth. Because he would be the one fighting in the press room, he would be the one attacked from all sides because of it, and he knew it would be a press conference that would not go well. The press didn't care about anything else than "telling the people the truth". They didn't care about the political consequences. They didn't understand when someone was telling them "it's a matter of national security". And Seth knew that tonight, he would have to keep his cool to face them.

After writing that statement, Emily went to Aaron's office and lied down on his couch. It was late, extremely late, but she wanted to wait for his return. It would take a while, but she wasn't feeling able to come home alone. Silent tears falling off her cheeks, she fell asleep before she could even realize it. She was exhausted, the rollercoaster of emotions she had endured during the day had worn her out.

It's only when the door of Aaron's office opened that she woke up, and she jumped a bit, startled. She had slept longer than expected, and Aaron was already back. He was surprised to see her here. He had just come by his office to put some files on his desk before heading home, and had not imagined she would have spent the night here.

"Aaron!" she jumped off the couch and ran toward him.

But before she could jump in his arms, she stopped. His arm was in a sling.

"What happened? I thought you were okay?" she exclaimed, surprised.

"I am fine. Don't worry. Did you really think I would let them tell you that I had been injured?" Aaron answered, smiling softly.

"What happened?" she asked, suddenly worried.

"Nothing, just a bullet that brushed my arm."

"A what? That's what fine is for you?"

"Em… Look at me, I am fine, I am alive, on my feet, and talking normally. It's just a sling… It will be gone in a few days…"

"Yeah, you are wearing a sling. That's what worries me! This is more than just "brushing your arm", right?"

"Okay. They had to take it off my arm. But I assure you I am fine. I am. Come here, I can still hug you with my other arm. I missed you."

Emily walked the remaining distance between them and nestled in his valid arm. She started crying. She was back with him, and he was in one piece, or mostly. This was the last time he would leave her side and go to a war zone, she would make sure of that.


	12. The Forever

The last part of the chapter is **rated M**.

* * *

THE FOREVER

"Em… I think we should elope."

That's how everything started. Emily looked up toward Aaron when he said that, raised an eyebrow, and asked him when this idea had popped in his mind. They were having a quiet evening in front of the TV, watching a stupid re-run of a stupid rom-com that Aaron hated so much and Emily loved so much.

"I've been thinking about it for a while actually. I'm tired of waiting. I want you to be my wife. We got engaged more than two months ago, but because of our jobs, we can't make any progress in the preparation of our wedding. We haven't even chosen a date yet. And you know, the election is only months away, we will have less and less time to prepare our wedding. I feel like if we don't do this now, we won't be married before years… And you know it's going to be a mess to organize everything. My family is spread all across Mexico, yours is in Connecticut mostly. I just really want to be married to you."

Emily had sat up a bit in the couch, looking at him, her eyes shinning with the declaration he had just made. He already wanted to be married to her…

"But, what about your big wedding with our families and everything? I thought you wanted that more than anything." Emily asked.

"I still do, but I think the ceremony can wait. I, however, cannot wait to be married to you. And we have 4 days off next week. When is the last time we had such a long time off together?" Aaron explained.

"That is such a crazy idea." Emily said, in her thoughts.

"You don't seem too keen on it, do you?" Aaron asked.

"I do, I like the idea actually. It's just that I never really thought about it. I always thought we would have a traditional kind of wedding. But, I have to say that I love the idea of us being married next week."

So here they were, a week later at the airport on their way to Anchorage, Alaska. It was a Thursday evening, and they had managed to catch a plane in the evening to be there on Friday morning. Except for the President, to whom they had told they would be unreachable for the whole week-end, they had not told anyone about eloping during the week end. They knew it would be hard to tell everyone afterwards, especially their parents, but they had decided to keep it for themselves for now. It was their moment, the day they would remember for the rest of their lives.

Managing to plan everything is such a short amount of time had been a challenge. Their week had been crazy, dealing with crises almost every day, but they had managed to buy their outfits for the day and to go to a jewelry store to buy wedding bands. They would engrave them later, when they would come back from their trip. What had taken most of their time, and much more than they had thought, had been to deal with all the papers to get married over there. It's only in the morning, when they had finished to pack and had picked up their wedding bands that they had finally been ready to go.

Though it was his idea, Aaron was stressed. Now that they were on a plane to Seattle, and then to Anchorage, he was wondering if they had made the right decision. Marrying Emily wasn't the problem, that he was more sure than ever, he could already picture themselves in the wilderness, just as they had planned, the two of them. However, the elopement in itself was the problem. He had received a call from his mother just an hour before boarding, and he had lied to her when she had asked how the preparations of the wedding were going. He knew that announcing it to his family afterwards would be hard, and that Adriana would probably yell at him. The family was very keen on traditions, and it would be hard for his mom to swallow.

"Are you okay, hon'?" Emily asked, seeing Aaron in his thoughts.

"Yeah, yeah, it's just that my mom called a couple of hours ago. And I lied about this week-end, and I kinda feel bad about it." Aaron explained.

"I know what you mean…" Emily confessed. "My mom called too. She asked me what we were doing over the week-end, and I almost let it slip. But then, I realized I shouldn't say it, we decided not to tell anyone before we do it. So I kept quiet, and now I feel bad too."

"You're still on board with the idea though?" Aaron questioned.

"Hell yes I am. I am more than excited. But I know it's going to be complicated to tell them afterwards…" Emily paused. "But hey, we are getting married. We finally are. That's all that matters for now!"

The rest of the trip went by pretty fast, and after napping in the two planes they had caught, they were on their way to the cute little wooden cabin they had rented for the week end. It was on the lakefront, they could see the mountains from their bedroom. It was just at the edge of the national park, they were surrounded by trees and nature. Both Emily and Aaron knew it would be beautiful, but they had not realized it would be. They were in awe. It was still a bit chilly outside and the fire had been started in the fireplace. They had just arrived, but it felt like home. They were excited and fascinated at once.

"Are we really getting married here? That's the most beautiful place I've ever seen" Emily exclaimed.

"I know right? I'm just amazed it's actually happening." Aaron answered, taking Emily in his arms.

They were standing outside on the patio, looking at the landscape in front of them. Everything was so peaceful, they could have spent hours there.

It's only the next afternoon that they were getting married. Emily was hiding in the bedroom, managing to put her dress on her own, which was harder than she had expected, doing her make-up and hair. She had a long white bustier dress. She had never thought she would find a dress that easily, but she had known it was the one as soon as she had seen it. In the meantime, Aaron was in the bathroom. Though they had decided to elope, they had kept some traditions, including not seeing each other in their outfit before the wedding. Looking at himself in the mirror, he was checking that his curls were holding the way he wanted, loose enough so that Emily would love it, but not too loose so that it wouldn't look messy. Pulling on his bow-tie to make sure it was holding in place, he left the bathroom to call for Emily.

"Em, are you ready?"

Emily opened the door between the bedroom and the living room to reveal herself to Aaron. Speechless, his eyes went wide when he saw her. She was beautiful every day, but today, she was stunning. He was in awe when she walked toward him. He could swear that she was pushing back the limits of perfection every single day.

"Em… I don't have the words…"

Aaron bent a little to kiss her, but she pushed him back.

"Nope. Next time we kiss, we are husband and wife. Not before." Emily teased.

Aaron chuckled, and before he could say anything, the pastor that would marry them arrived. The photographer and his assistant that they had hired for a couple of hours arrived soon after, and they gathered outside, right by the lake, to exchange their vows. Holding their hands, looking at each other in the eyes, Aaron started.

"Emily Claire Rhodes, you are the most beautiful thing that happened in my life. You are the gem that makes my heart full, the one who makes me happy all the time, who reassures me when I'm worried, who comforts me when I'm sad, who makes me smile every time I see you. You are the one who made me become a better man. My parents always told me that Washington was not the place for love, that I would never find someone, and until I met you, I thought they were right. But then, you entered my life, and the very first day I met you, I knew you'd change my world for the best. This day, here with you, is just the beginning of the long life we are going to spend together."

"Aaron Alexander Shore, life has been epic since I met you, and I'm sure it will continue to be as long as I'm with you. There has been ups and downs, our relation has not always been easy, but together, we've always been strong, because you are the one who makes me strong, who understands me and believes in me, who will push me to make the right thing. You made me believe that love is unbreakable, that no matter how hard it can be sometimes, we'll always land back on our feet and become stronger from the crisis we've been through. I never thought it was possible to think of someone every single second of my life, and you proved me wrong. Marrying you today, here in this beautiful place is all I could ever dream of, and I will remember this forever.

It was their moment. Nothing and no-one around them mattered.

"Emily Claire Rhodes, will you have this man to be your husband, to live together with him in the covenant of marriage ? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health, and, forsaking all others, be faithful unto him as long as you both shall live?"

"I will"

"Aaron Alexander Shore, will you have this woman to be your wife, to live together with her in the covenant of marriage ? Will you love her, comfort her, honor her and keep her, in sickness and in health, and, forsaking all others, be faithful unto her as long as you both shall live?"

"I will"

"I now pronounce you husband and wife, you may kiss the bride"

They kissed softly, they were now married. It was the most romantic, unique and intimate wedding they could ever dream of. They were finally married, and none of them could really realize it, even with their rings on their fingers. It was feeling unreal, like a dream come true they still didn't realize had happened.

A few hours later, they were both sitting on the couch in front of the fireplace, a glass of one of those expensive wines they had bought for the occasion. Aaron had taken his bow-tie off, but Emily was still wearing her dress. She had not planned on wearing it that long, but she wanted Aaron to be the one to undress her.

It was still utter bliss, they were in an over romantic mood, not able to stop starring at each other's ring, spending most of the time kissing. Minute after minute, things were starting to heat up, and as stunning as she was, Aaron was dying to take off Emily's dress.

"Don't you think that, right here, on this blankets in front of the fireplace, would be a great place to consummate our marriage? We don't have a fireplace at home, that would be… unprecedented." Aaron stated.

"Well, maybe you should start by taking this dress off of me… I'm actually surprised it took you that long…" Emily smirked.

"I just wanted to admire you as long as possible in this stunning dress." Aaron answered.

"Smooth talker…" Emily smiled.

Emily sat up and turned her back to Aaron so he could unzip her dress. He did so, slowly, and Emily stood up to help Aaron take her dress off completely. Emily's brand new beige lace strapless bra and matching panties didn't go unnoticed to Aaron, and he pulled her toward him, making her straddle him. He started kissing her in the neck, slowly, delicately, while she was starting to unbutton his white shirt. Finally reaching the bottom of his shirt, Emily tugged on it to take it off of his trousers and to finish unbuttoning it. She then took it off and put it aside on the couch. Aaron put his hands under her and stood up, holding her. He walked the couple of feet that separated them from the blanket in front of the fireplace and kneeled gently, making her lay on it, and put the pillows under her head. He was about to go down between her thighs, but Emily stopped him.

"Let me take off your trousers first…"

He smiled and helped her doing what she wanted. Now both in their underwear, Aaron's hands continued to caress Emily's body. She knew his hands by heart, but for the first time, she could feel his wedding band on his finger, and it was making her shiver. His hand went down between her thighs and he caressed her right where she wanted him to go. She was already so wet, he could feel it through her lace panties. He kissed her gently through her panties, and then back up to her breasts. His hands were toying with the clasp of her fancy bra. She had never have any opening at the front before, and he was loving it. As soon as he opened it, it revealed her beautiful breasts, and Aaron soon attacked her nipples, licking and sucking on them. She let out a sigh of contentment, enjoying the feel of Aaron's mouth on her while his hands were travelling up and down her body, caressing her gently in all the places she wanted him to be. Her hands were playing with his now messy curls, and they continued their little foreplay a little bit more. They were taking their time, not at all in a hurry to finish their very enjoyable evening. Emily ended up running her hands down his abs and toward his underwear, caressing his already very hard erection through the fabric, and tugging on the elastic band to take it off. Aaron took no time either to slide her panties down her legs and they were now both naked. Pushing Aaron on the side, Emily took the lead and straddled him to finally make one with him. She was moving slowly, enjoying every feel. Aaron's hands were on her hips, holding her, helping her with the rhythm. He then slid down his hand to Emily's clit and started playing with it. Surprised, Emily let a loud moan escape from her lips. Their breathings were getting faster, every thrust bringing them closer to a release. Sitting back up, Aaron's hands traveled in her back as he starting leaving kisses in her neck, down to her breasts. He then kissed her languorously and managed to turn them around, taking charge in their lovemaking. On top of her, he started speeding up his thrusts, their moans filling the room. Emily was shivering from the sensation. Her hands were in his neck, pulling him closer to her. His lips on her neck, he was making a love bite, shivers were travelling down her body.

"Aaron, faster please" Emily pleaded.

His lips still on her neck, Emily could feel him smiling as he started speeding his thrusts just as told. They would probably not last long anymore, everything was so perfect, they were perfect together and every thrust was the proof of it. He took one of her hand in his and encouraged her to touch herself. Their entangled hands were caressing her clit, playing with it, Aaron following Emily's lead.

"I want us to come together" he said in between two moans.

Emily's finger playing with her clit, she knew exactly where and how to touch. The combination of her touch and his thrusts were sending her to heaven. Aaron's movements became faster and faster, and when he felt her walls clench around him, he let a loud moan escape from his lips, orgasming in an almost perfect unison with her. Staying inside her, he fell on her and kissed her softly. They were both catching their breath, coming down from their high.

"I love you so much, Emily Shore" Aaron said, proud to use her wedded name for the first time.

"I love you too, husband" Emily answered, as proud as him.

They stayed in front of the fireplace for as long as they could remember, cuddling and enjoying their first night as a married couple.


	13. The Revelation

THE REVELATION

Emily and Aaron had been back to Washington for only a few of hours before they got called in at the White House for a crisis. They had barely had the time to unpack and sleep a short while when Emily first received the call, soon followed by Aaron. It was 5 in the morning and they were already on their way to the White House, parking before quickly going out of the car. They slid their badge to get in the White House, and soon realized that they had not decided how to deal with telling people about their secret wedding. They both had their wedding bands on their fingers, and looked at each other.

"What do we do? Should we take these off?" Emily asked.

"No, I don't care, everybody will know soon anyway, let's just go down to the command ops" Aaron answered, quickly kissing her.

They were not the first ones in the command ops, and Tom Kirkman smiled softly at them, a discreet congratulations nod, and the meeting started.

"The U.S. embassy in Israel has been attacked, we don't have infos on who is hurt and who isn't. It seems like a bomb exploded right at the entrance of the embassy and we do not know who is injured and who isn't…"

It wasn't before 10 a.m. that they were finally able to get out of the command ops and get coffee in the break room. They had been working all morning and it was a hell of a day to go back to work after a break. They both walked to the coffee machine and took a cup of the dark blend that was awaiting for them. They were both in desperate need of it and enjoyed every sip. Being gone for 4 days also meant they had a lot to catch up on, and they knew they wouldn't leave the White House before the sunset. It was only when they were about to part ways that they crossed Seth's path who greeted them and started talking. Casual conversation stopped soon when Seth noticed the wedding band on Aaron's left hand.

"You didn't…" Seth asked, half shocked, half blaming them.

Aaron and Emily both knew where this was headed for and didn't try to hide the fact that they eloped during the week end.

"Actually, we did…" Emily said with pleading eyes.

"When? Where? Why?" Seth asked, curious and still shocked.

"Saturday, in Alaska?" Aaron answered, hesitant, not really sure how their friend would react.

"Woah, you went all the way up there to elope? That's insane!" Seth exclaimed.

"Man…" Aaron scolded discreetly. "You're the first one to know… Please keep it quiet for now?"

"You know wedding bands are actually not discreet? Right? And who did you tell anyway? Kirkman knows?"

"Yeah he does. And you. That's all for now. So don't shout it all around the West Wing, please?" Aaron pleaded.

"Wait what? You didn't even tell your families?" Seth asked.

"Nope… We wanted to keep this for ourselves. But I guess we'll have to tell them soon." Emily answered, the guilt hitting her quickly.

"Ooooh. Good luck with that… Anyway, congrats friends! I'm really happy for you" Seth exclaimed.

He hugged Aaron and Emily one after the other, congratulating them sincerely. Seth didn't look too hurt about it, and they hoped it was a good sign that maybe everyone would be fine with it. Finally splitting ways to go to their own offices, Aaron and Emily spent the day catching up on paperwork, meetings, and dealing with the aftermath of the bombing on the U.S. embassy. This attack had triggered a new debate on the American position in the Middle East, and they knew long days were ahead of them.

It's only shortly before 10 p.m. that they came home together, exhausted. Aaron decided to call his parents as it wasn't that late in Mexico, and he knew the soonest would be the best. Emily ordered dinner and opened a bottle of wine, and then sat on the couch next to him while he was calling. Aaron and his mom had a bad habit of speaking a mix of Spanish and English every single time they were on the phone. Emily didn't like that, because it meant she couldn't catch everything they were saying. As much as she was working on her Spanish since she had started dating Aaron, it was still hard to understand a language she had not spoken since her college days, especially in fluent and rather fast Spanish. Though, she quickly noticed when the subject changed and Aaron started talking about the wedding. Suddenly, there were no more English at all, and she could hear the voice raising on the other end of the line. Aaron too, had started speaking faster, and she didn't like that. She started feeling a lump in her throat, and realized that she wouldn't be able to sleep properly if she wasn't calling her parents tonight. It was late in Connecticut, especially for Emily's parents who weren't night owls, but she decided to call them anyway. She left the living room and went to sat on their bed, waiting desperately for someone to pick up.

"Emily. Hi honey. Is everything okay? It's late…" Sharon was worried, Emily could feel it in her voice.

"Hi Mom. No, everything is fine. I assure you, everything is fine. I just wanted to tell you something, and it couldn't wait…"

Emily's mom was still worried. She started talking and talking, asking all sorts of questions. Was she pregnant? Did Aaron cheat on Emily? Did they break up? But the right question never popped. Emily sighed, gathered her courage and cut her mom.

"Aaron and I eloped." she said point blank.

"You what?" Sharon asked, stunned.

"Aaron and I went to Alaska this week-end, and we got married there." Emily repeated.

"But… Why?"

Emily could hear that her mom's voice had started trembling. Sharon suddenly started sniffing over the phone, and Emily realized her mom was crying. It was hurting Emily so much that her mom was hurt.

"Mom. Listen to me. We will have a celebration, we will renew our vows at one point or another. It's just that we don't have time to organize everything now, and it will be even worse in the next few months. The election is this year, we know it will be crazy. We didn't want to wait that long to get married." Emily said, trying to reassure her mom.

But truth was Emily could still hear her mother sniffing on the phone and it was breaking her heart. She could feel tears coming to her eyes, and she didn't know how much longer she could hold them.

"Emily… You're my only baby girl. I'm just sad I didn't get the chance to see you in what I am sure was a beautiful wedding dress, I didn't get to go buy that dress with you, I didn't get to help you prepare that wedding with you. I was looking forward to it, so, so much." Sharon paused, her voice strangled. "I just wanted to do that with my baby girl…"

That's all it took for Emily to burst into tears. She was racked with guilt, and though of course she was more than happy to be Aaron's wife, it suddenly felt hard to own up for what they had done. She had of course expected Sharon to be sad, or even mad at her. But she had never imagined she would cry, not in any of the million scenarios she had made in her mind since they had come back from Alaska.

"Mom. I promise you, you'll still be able to do that with me. I promise we will make a ceremony, renew our vows in front of everybody. I can't say when, because we won't have time before the next election, but I promise we will. And we will buy a dress together. And we will make the seating arrangements together. And we will make invitations. And everything that includes a real wedding. It will be a real wedding. I promise you that. And Mike is not married yet, you'll be able to plan his wedding too. Don't worry."

Emily was still sniffing, but she smiled at the idea of her mom organizing her younger brother's wedding. Sharon had already taken care of Dan's wedding, Emily's older brother, and it had turned out amazing, no matter how much it had annoyed him to see her rule everything for the wedding.

"But, Mike is not a girl. I'll never buy him a wedding dress…" Sharon laughed in between two sobs.

"You could probably try." Emily laughed. "I promise, we will buy a dress together."

With that, Sharon started feeling better, and Emily too. They started talking a little bit about the wedding, and Emily told her everything about Alaska, how everything had happened, how the idea popped in their minds. The only thing she neglected to tell was that it was Aaron's idea. Sharon seemed so upset about this that Emily thought it was maybe a little too soon to tell her that. She didn't want her mom to hate Aaron. Emily was really enthusiastic, she was happy about this wedding, and Sharon could feel it. It eased her pain a little to say her baby girl happier than ever. She could picture her baby girl in her beautiful dress, and even if she didn't have pictures yet, she could see that it had been the most beautiful day of Emily's life.

In the end, they talked longer than they thought, and when Emily came back to the living room, Aaron was done calling his family, the dinner had been delivered and was almost cold.

"How did it go?" Aaron asked.

"Not like I had imagined it… And you?" Emily answered.

"Not like I had imagined it either… She yelled at me about how I broke the traditions." Aaron chuckled.

"She cried because she would never be able to buy me a wedding dress…"

"Well, I guess it could have been worse…" Aaron smiled softly.

"Yeah, they could have disowned us…"

Emily smiled sadly and Aaron could see that she had cried. He took her in his arms, cuddling her gently, and they spent the rest of their evening in front of the TV, relaxing after such an emotional day.


	14. The Discovery

THE DISCOVERY

It had been almost 7 months since Emily and Aaron had eloped in Alaska. After the bliss of their getaway, they had been back to work and had been caught up in it since. They had barely time for themselves and though their families had pressured them to have a wedding ceremony soon, they had hold on, not wanting to drown with the workload and preparation of a celebration. Tom Kirkman had formally been chosen by the Democrats to represent the party to the next presidential election, after primaries that did not really held any suspense or surprise. The presidential election was in 3 months, and everybody was running here and there to support Kirkman and still continue to run the country. Emily and Aaron were often running to one end or the other of the country, following Kirkman in one of his meetings, or back at the White House to push the Congress into passing the last few reforms they wanted to before the election. At least, they had not had any national crisis for quite a while, and they were all thankful not to have to deal with that in addition to the rest. Their days were pretty long, but they were managing to keep a good rhythm and enough time to sleep so that they would be able to hold like that until the election.

Today was no exception, Emily was working at the White House while Aaron was on a meeting in Pennsylvania with Tom Kirkman. They had left early in the morning and had planned 3 meetings in the state for the day. The campaign staff was trying to plan the most they could in a short time so that Kirkman could continue his job in the same time. Aaron, as his national security adviser, was often in rallies with Kirkman when the main theme was about security, borders, immigration or foreign policy. He was briefing Kirkman on what to say or not and how to react to the latest news somewhere in the world. It was a full time job that Aaron absolutely loved, but sometimes he wanted the campaign to be already over. He had managed to call Emily in between two rallies and spend a few minutes talking to her privately. He knew he would be home way after she would be asleep, and he missed cuddling with her and talking about his day with her. She would probably wake up earlier than him and go to work before dawn. They had actually barely seen each other in the last two weeks, and the only moments they had were when they were actually able to sleep in the same bed. Those past months had been pretty stressful for both of them as Kirkman had relied on them a lot for everything he couldn't handle while being gone for the campaign.

"Hi…" Aaron said when Emily picked up the phone.

"Hey, I only have five minutes before my next meeting… How are you doing? I missed you this morning." Emily answered.

Aaron was sad to know she wouldn't talk to him as long as they both wanted to, but at least he could hear her voice for a couple of minutes and it was reassuring him.

"I missed you too. We're on our way to Philly, the next rally is in two hours. It's been pretty intense but the first meeting went fine, so for now everything's good. How are you?" he asked

"I'm good, it's been a bit crazy here, I've had back-to-back meetings with Congressmen for the past two days to secure their vote. But I think we'll get through this. And hopefully I'll be home early tonight, whatever that means for us…"

"You should take it slow, I'm worrying for you…" Aaron answered, truly worried for his wife.

"Don't worry hon', I'm fine, I just need to get some more sleep. I have to go, I'm so sorry, please wake me up when you come home tonight. I miss you."

"I will, talk to you soon…"

With that, Emily ran to her next meeting, feeling sad that she had not been able to talk more to her husband, but determined to get through this day efficiently and go home early. She went to meetings one after the other for the biggest part of the day, and it was around 2 p.m. that she was back to her office with a cup of coffee. She sat at her desk and took her shoes off, breathing deeply. It was her fourth cup of coffee since she had arrived at the White House this morning, but the feeling of exhaustion was still here, no matter what she was doing or drinking. She put her head on the headrest of her chair, closing her eyes for a couple of minutes before going back to setting up meetings with the rest of the Congress she still had not been able to meet. She was feeling a bit dizzy, but it wasn't surprising her since she had not felt well for the past few days. She took a couple of Tylenols and waited a little, hoping that the pain radiating in her whole body would fade sooner rather than later. But half an hour later, she still wasn't felling well, and added to her dizziness, she had started having a stomach ache. She was wondering whether she was just too tired or if she had caught some stupid bug or some kind of flu. She couldn't really understand, she was never sick, had not been around sick people for a while, and it was the beginning of August, so she had no reason to be sick. She took her bottle of water and drank half of it, she breathed deeply. She still had work to do, and had really had no time to take a sick day for now. As the pain started to grow more intense, she took another couple of pills, hoping it would finally have an effect on her. She knew it wasn't a good idea, but the pain was preventing her from being efficient at work, and she didn't like that.

Seth knocked at her door and came in, ready to ask Emily about the next press briefing and how things had gone with the Congressmen he knew she had met earlier in the day. But he soon realized Emily wasn't feeling well. She was as white as a sheet and she looked exhausted.

"Are you okay? You don't look so great…" Seth asked.

"I'm fine, I'll be fine, it's just a stupid stomach ache…" Emily said, wincing.

"Just a stomach ache? Emily, you're wincing, I'm not buying it…" Seth answered, worried.

"I'm sure it's nothing. I wish it could pass quickly, I have other things to do… But I've been overtired the last few days, Aaron and I have barely seen each other in the past two weeks, you know what it is, we're drowning with the workload…" Emily answered, trying to reassure Seth as much as herself.

"And you're telling me that not seeing Aaron is making you wince like that? Come on Em, you need to see a doctor…"

"I don't have time for that, I still have meetings to set up with Congressmen and I have to prepare for the next rally cause I'll be with Kirkman in Ohio…"

Emily winced once more while saying that. The pain was getting stronger and she was trying her best to keep her composure in front of Seth. She could feel tears forming in her eyes, and Seth walked toward her desk, taking her coat and forcing her to stand up.

"Em, I'm taking you to the ER, look at you, you can't even walk normally. You said so yourself, Aaron's not here, so I'm taking care of you… come on let's go…"

"No, I don't have time for that" Emily tried to resist.

"Emily, no arguing, you're coming with me now." Seth raised his voice.

Emily gave up as Seth was frowning. He called a cab who took them to the hospital and texted Aaron on their way over there.

 _"Come back ASAP to D.C.. I'm taking Em to ER. Nothing life-threatening, but she really doesn't feel well._

 _\- Seth"_

Aaron saw the message as soon as it popped on his phone. He was right in the middle of this important speech Kirkman was giving in Philadelphia, listening carefully to what he was saying. He rose as discreetly as possible and quickly left the room, trying to call back Seth unsuccessfully. Walking toward Kirkman's campaign manager, he told him he had to go and that he was still reachable over the phone. Anthony tried to argue, but he knew Aaron well, if he was leaving in a hurry, there was a good reason for that. Aaron also left a note to Kirkman, apologizing and explaining things, and then left for the train station, who thankfully was only a few blocks away from the convention center. He caught a train back to Washington pretty quickly, but the 2-hour trip between the two cities was still too long to his mind. Tapping his foot on the floor, he was trying to reach Seth again, but it was always going straight to voicemail. He didn't like that, he didn't know what was happening with Emily, and it's only an hour later that he started getting texts from Seth.

In the meantime, Seth was starting to get annoyed too. Emily was still not feeling well, but it had taken them a good hour before someone would take care of her. They ran a batterie of tests on her, asked her thousands of questions, and finally gave her something for the pain while they put her in a room to wait for the results. Seth couldn't understand what was taking so long, and he was updating Aaron by texts, hoping he would arrive soon.

It's only three hours after getting that very first text that Aaron finally arrived in the hospital. He had taken a cab between the train station and the hospital, and was now almost running in the hallways of it, worried sick for Emily. From afar, he saw Seth walking outside to take a phone call, and Aaron entered the room a few seconds before the doctor. He quickly kissed Emily, asking her how she was feeling, and sat on the chair next to Emily, holding her hand. The doctor greeted them and told them the only thing they had not expected.

"Mrs. Shore, you are pregnant. 6 months pregnant."


	15. The Confusion

THE CONFUSION

"What ? No I'm not…" Emily answered, almost laughing.

Emily and Aaron looked at each other, confused, and then Emily looked back at the doctor.

"I never had morning sickness, I still have my period, I'm taking the pill. There is no way I am pregnant."

Nothing could make her believe that she was pregnant, absolutely nothing. Sure, she had gained a couple of pounds recently, she could feel it because her skirts were harder to close, but with the load of work, she wasn't eating very healthily recently, so she wasn't really surprised.

"Actually you are. This is what we call a denial of pregnancy. I know this might be confusing for both of you. Usually, it happens when the mother had some kind of trauma. It's all psychological, the brain completely shuts any possibility of being pregnant, so the body continues to work like it always do. According to your patient file, you had a miscarriage almost two years ago, this is probably what triggered your denial." the doctor explained.

"But, my stomach is flat. How can a baby fit in a flat stomach like that. And as I said, I still have my period. I had it two weeks ago. I remember it, I can show you the packet of my pill, it's in my purse." Emily attested, sure of herself.

"I understand that Mrs. Shore, I do. Usually, the baby finds a way to grow differently. I am ordering an ultrasound for you as soon as possible. I know it is a shock. We will talk about everything after your ultrasound, and we will set appointments with you to help you overcome everything. You are not the first woman to go through this, don't worry. For now, I'll let you alone for a bit, give you a little time for all of this to sink in, and then I'll be back for the ultrasound."

The doctor left the room. Aaron tightened his grip around Emily's hand as they were looking at each other in the eyes again. They couldn't understand what was happening, it was too unreal. Aaron had not said a word since the announcement. He didn't know what to say.

"How are you feeling?" he asked softly, kissing her on the temple.

"Confused. I don't understand. There is no possibility that I am pregnant." Emily answered.

"I am confused too. I don't know either. I mean, I remember last time you were pregnant. You were sick every morning… Why wouldn't have you been this time? And, you don't look pregnant at all…" Aaron said, unsure.

They kept quiet, not really knowing what to say. Aaron looked at Emily's belly and put his hand on it. He couldn't feel anything, it was still flat. How could a baby of 6 months be in that stomach?

Seth came back at that time, knocking at the door and breaking the heavy atmosphere in the room. The Press Secretary quickly realized something was not right.

"What is going on? You look like you've seen a ghost, man…" Seth stated.

"Emily's pregnant." Aaron answered.

"What? That's awesome! Congrats! Why are you so upset?" Seth exclaimed.

"Seth…" Emily continued. "They say I'm 6 months pregnant…"

"You what?"

Seth leaned on the wall of the room, confused too. The atmosphere had become heavy again, and everybody stayed quiet for a while before Aaron explained what the doctor had told Emily. Seth listened carefully, but still couldn't get it. It seemed so unrealistic for him too. He stayed there a little bit longer to support his friends, and then left to go back to work for a little while.

Emily was taken for her scheduled ultrasound half an hour after Seth's departure. Still holding hands, Aaron and Emily were not really sure what to expect. Last time they had come here had been for a terrible reason, and it was reminding them both of these times when they had lost the baby. This time, it was for a good reason, but it was still unbelievable to expect their first child under these circumstances. They were still confused and couldn't really explain how they were feeling.

They did that ultrasound on Emily's still flat stomach, and though they could clearly see a baby on the screen, they still weren't sure it was theirs. And then, they heard a heartbeat. Aaron smiled softly, suddenly realizing it, and Emily started crying. She was completely overwhelmed. Emotions started rushing over her, questions popping in her mind. Why did she have a denial? How was it possible? How could she not realize that a baby was growing inside her? She was starting to think that she would be a terrible mother. She sobbed, still confused, but hating herself in the meantime. She could feel herself suffocating, staring to panic, and she stopped looking at the screen to try to get a grip back on her emotions.

For a couple more hours, Emily and Aaron met with different doctors, from the gynecologist to the psychologist, explaining them everything. They had come to the conclusion that the accumulation of work and stress, coupled with the post traumatic stress Emily had suffered from her miscarriage had caused the denial. They explained all the rapid changes that would occur for Emily, and especially that her belly would grow rapidly. They told her she would have a hard time getting used to the pregnancy and that she would suffer stress, feeling often overwhelmed by all the changes. They set up appointments with the psychologist to help both Emily and Aaron deal with everything, and talked about how to announce everything to their friends and families. Emily's mind started racing. It was really the worst time possible to be pregnant. The campaign was in full swing, their jobs were extremely demanding, especially these days. As for him, Aaron was just thinking practical. He was thinking about everything they would have to deal with in barely three months, preparing a room for the baby, buying everything, getting ready for it. He was overwhelmed too.

It's only shortly before 10 p.m. that Emily was discharged from the hospital and they came back home. They were silent. They were like stoned. Lost in their thoughts, they went straight to bed, not saying anything, just hugging each other tight like they were used to. The atmosphere was still oppressive. Emily had been given a full week of sick leave, and for once, she had not argued. Exhausted, she fell asleep almost as soon as her head hit the pillow. However, Aaron couldn't sleep. He couldn't stop tossing, still wondering how everything was possible, how he could not have seen anything. He was asking himself whether he had done everything in his power after Emily's miscarriage, and they had handle everything well. The clock had turned 2 a.m. when the tiredness finally took over him.

When Emily woke up the next morning, Aaron had already left for work a good while ago. A bit lost, it's only when she sat up that she suddenly realized everything that had happened the day before. As the doctors had told her, her belly had grown in the night, and she could suddenly see herself very pregnant. She felt nausea come and ran to the bathroom, throwing up in the toilet and sitting next to it, crying. It took her a long time before managing to calm herself. She stood up and walked to the kitchen to make coffee, like she was used to. Pouring coffee into a mug, it's only when she started drinking it that she realized that she wasn't supposed to anymore, and she let the mug fall on the floor. It broke, and the coffee splashed, almost burning her feet. She started sobbing again, cleaned everything and sat on the floor. It wasn't her type to behave like that, she didn't like it, so she closed her eyes, doing her best to disregard her bump. She stood up again, opened the fridge to find some smoothie and walked to the couch where she took her computer and started looking at things online about her situation. It reassured her a little when she realized that many more women than she thought had been through this, and that they had made it, that she could make it. She was feeling a little better, but then her hand brushed her belly and she started crying again, realizing how big it was. It was like a vicious circle, she was stuck with it, and she started wondering if she actually wanted a baby. She had wanted it for so long, but after her miscarriage, she had pushed that thought so far away from her mind that now, it was like she didn't want it anymore. She was just not ready for it.

She had spent hours sitting on the couch when she was taken out of her thoughts by a knock at the door of their apartment. She wasn't expecting anyone and was in no state to welcome anyone. Her heart started beating faster, stressed by the sudden visitor. She almost wanted to play dead and ignore it, but a second knock made her stood up and walk toward the door. She looked through the peephole. It was her mom, waiting with a bag in her hand. What was she doing here? Emily opened the door but hid herself behind it, not knowing how to react. Did her mom know? What would she say?

"Sweetie…" Sharon started. "Aaron called me. He didn't want you to be alone all day…"

That's all it took for Emily to start crying again. Her mom came in and took her in her arms. For the first time, Emily's bump was in middle, and her sobs doubled in intensity. How was she supposed to adapt to this?

"It's gonna be okay sweetie. You're gonna get through this. Aaron told me he would try be home early. Dad is coming tonight after work, I'll pick him up at the airport. You'll get through, we will be here for you, both of you."

Emily felt overwhelmed by her mother's comment, but as much as she wanted to, she couldn't believe it. It felt like the world had stopped spinning and she would never make it out of this nightmare.

As for him, Aaron spent the day at the White House, but his mind was wandering elsewhere. He had called Sharon first thing in the morning, asking her to come down from Hartford to take care of Emily. He hoped that she would be okay with him telling Sharon about everything but he didn't want his wife to be alone all day long. Looking at his watch, he realized that his mother-in-law had probably arrived at their apartment by now, and he felt a little relieved that she could take care of Emily. He couldn't stop thinking about her. How was she holding up? Was she okay? What he couldn't stop thinking about either was Emily's baby bump. Even in the dim light of the morning, Aaron had noticed that Emily's belly had grown during the night. The doctor had told them that it would happen, but it had still been a shock to actually realize it. He couldn't stop thinking about everything, he wanted to be there for Emily, but he didn't know how to do this. It was hard for him too, he would be a dad in less than three months, and he wasn't sure he was ready for this. But for Emily, it was indeed even harder. She was the one who was suddenly pregnant and stuck with this. He was rewinding everything, wondering how it had possibly happened, why it had happened? What was confusing him even more was that Emily had never stopped taking the pill. Trying to pinpoint exactly when Emily had become pregnant, he realized that she had been sick around these times, and that it had probably affected the purpose of the pill.

Second thing in the morning for Aaron had been to request a quick meeting with the President as soon as he had arrived in the Oval Office. The National Security Adviser had apologized for leaving in such a hurry the previous day and had explained everything. Always so kind, Tom Kirkman had offered his support and told him he could take a couple of days off too. Aaron had declined, but had asked to be taken off of the campaign and to stay with Emily at the White House as much as possible. He had asked to help out Emily when she would be back from her sick leave. All of this had been accepted without discussion, it had been a huge relief for Aaron. Tom Kirkman was truly a good man, always worried for his staffer's wellness.

In between two meetings, he had talked a little bit with Seth, who had been surprised to see him at work today. Everybody around him was telling him he should be home with his wife, and he knew they were right, but he couldn't do it. As much as he wanted to, he couldn't confront himself with the reality of things, and it's only when Seth came back to his office and scolded him in the late afternoon that Aaron finally came back home.


	16. The Adjustment

THE ADJUSTMENT

Almost a week after finding out about her pregnancy, Emily couldn't say things were fine, but they were starting to get a little better. She had decided she would be back to work in two days, and this was helping her cope with everything. She couldn't stay in their apartment anymore, not doing anything, just fuming and wandering all the time.

As much as she loved her parents, she had sent them back to Hartford only three days after they had arrived. She couldn't thank them more for coming down to Washington, they had been real gems and it had been very nice to be able to confide and talk about things, especially with her mom. They had taken care of Aaron too, and Emily knew that her husband had appreciated very much Peter's reassuring words about everything and being ready to be a dad. But Emily was feeling oppressed, and she had quickly asked them to go back home. She felt like she needed to prepare for her future life of a mother, and she couldn't do it with her parents around.

What had been the hardest for Aaron had been to call his parents and tell them the news. For some reason, it had been much easier to call Sharon and ask her to come. But his parents… It had taken Aaron three whole days before managing to call them. After that, it seemed that it had been easier for him, he was slowly getting used to the idea of being a dad soon. Though, he could feel that he was still walking on eggshells with Emily. He didn't know how to behave with her, he could see that she was faking it, she was acting as if she was strong and had already coped with everything, as if everything was normal. But he knew her too well to know that it wasn't true. She had started organizing everything, making lists, managing their life. The walls of the apartments were covered with lists of things to buy, things to do, ideas for names. She had even made a schedule, deciding when they would paint the room or when they would decorate.

Aaron was always afraid he would trigger a crisis. What was bothering him the most was coming home to her every evening. He was used to cuddle her, take her in his arms, but now that her baby bump was in the middle, he didn't know how to do it. He had never seen her put her hand on her belly, he knew she wasn't ready for this. Sometimes, sitting on the couch at night, he wanted to cuddle her, put his hand on her stomach, trying to feel something. But he knew that she would push him back, and he didn't want that. So he was dealing in his own way, offering her help whenever she needed it, but also going to work and minding his own business. Truth be told, as much as it was new for him too, he wished he could be more involved in the pregnancy. He knew it would be too short, that in less than three months they would be parents. He was feeling guilty every time he was thinking of the months he had missed of it, and it was already hard enough to cope with it. Now, he wanted to be a normal father-to-be, he wanted share this with his wife, and she wasn't letting him for now.

Aaron had decided to take the day off and stay with Emily. He was also exhausted from the workload, and was hoping to catch some sleep, but was woken up much earlier than planned by noises in the other room. Looking at the clock, he realized that it was only 7 a.m. but Emily was already vacuuming in the spare bedroom that would soon become the nursery. He stood up and walked to the room to see his wife cleaning the room, packing things and moving them. He leaned on the door frame.

"Em… What are you doing? It's seven…" Aaron asked, still groggy.

"Isn't that obvious? I'm cleaning. Since you are taking the day off, we should go buy things for the baby. At least the crib, and that would be great if we could buy the rest. You could put everything together afterwards, this way it would be ready." Emily answered, not paying attention to Aaron and still moving things around.

"Okay. One: I thought you wanted to paint the room first? Two: Do you realize that the stores open in… two hours? We still have time… Come back to bed please." Aaron tried to reason her.

"Yes, but I still have so many things to do…"

Aaron sighed loudly and left the room. He went back to their bedroom and let himself fall on the bed, wondering if it hadn't been better to go to work today.

It was a little after ten when they left for the shopping mall. Emily was still managing things and had made new lists, again. Aaron could already feel the headache coming. But before they could buy anything, he realized that Emily wasn't feeling well again. She started suffocating, she was feeling overwhelmed, and while looking at different cribs, she started crying again.

"Em, what is going on?" Aaron asked worriedly.

"Why are we doing all that? We don't even know if we're having a boy or a girl…" Emily said.

"What? Why are you suddenly worrying about it?" Aaron continued.

"Because… Look, what color should we choose? What if we choose something pink and the baby is a boy?"

Emily continued crying, and before Aaron could say anything, she ran outside the store to hide herself in a corner. He quickly followed her and took her in his arms, running his hand in her back to soothe her.

"Em… It's okay not to know the sex of the baby… Plenty of parents don't want to know. We'll buy gender neutral things. And if you want my opinion, I've never liked pink and blue stuff anyway…" Aaron said, trying to lighten the mood.

"Really?" Emily asked in between two sobs.

"Yes, really. And I can assure you there are plenty of gender neutral colors."

Emily continued sobbing, but he knew she needed it. It was true, they had not even asked the doctor about the sex of the baby. They had been so overwhelmed by the news that hey had completely forgotten about it.

"What do you want to do? Shall we continue or do you want to come back home? It's up to you." Aaron offered.

But against all odds, Emily started yelling at him, bursting into tears once more.

"I just want to get rid of that thing growing inside of me and I want a normal life again! I'm tired of all of this shit!"

Aaron gulped and shook his head, trying to swallow what she had just yelled. This was breaking his heart to see his wife so distressed. It made him shiver, his legs threatening to give way. He knew she wasn't feeling fine, but he had not expected this at all. It had been said with such power that he knew she really meant it, the sound of her voice couldn't have been more real. He felt tears coming to his eyes and it took him all the courage in the world not to cry. Trying to regain composure, he breathed out heavily and put his hands on her shoulders, forcing her to look at him in the eyes.

"Emily Claire Shore, look at me. I married you for a lot of reasons, and one of them is that you are the strongest, most courageous woman I've ever met. I know this is not what we had planned, hell, this is not what anyone could imagine or could want. It's insane, it doesn't make sense, I don't think it is supposed to. I know it's not the way we wanted to start a family, and nothing could have prepared us for that. I know it is overwhelming for you, because it is for me too. I know that you didn't want this, I didn't either, I know that you are the one stuck with this baby in your belly while a week ago you didn't even know it existed. I know that you are the one being forced to wear maternity clothes while a week ago you could fit in a skirt and suit. You wanna know what? I've spent the week reading pregnancy books, things on the denial of pregnancy, trying to understand what you must feel like, and I still cannot understand. But we are in this together, no matter what. This is another reason why I married you. Remember. In sickness and in health, I will love you, comfort you, honor you and keep you. You can rely on me, you have to rely on me."

Aaron took Emily's hand in his and put them on her belly.

"This baby, is going to be okay, and we will get through this. It wasn't expected and it changes so many things in our life. But it's not because we have less time to prepare that we will be bad parents, or that we won't love this baby. It's true that I wished we had lived a normal pregnancy, I know you hate yourself for not noticing you were pregnant, but it did happen, and with everything that is going on in our lives, it's not that surprising. We were both swamped into work, we didn't have time to think about it. And even if you don't talk to me about it, I know you still hate yourself for your miscarriage, and we will always mourn this baby we never had. But it doesn't mean we won't love this one, or we won't be able to take care of it. Emily, you have to talk to me, you have to rely on me, please do."

Emily sobbed and Aaron took her once more in his arms. Kissing her softly on the temple, Aaron decided they should come home and just spend the day resting. Emily was in no state to do shopping. So when they arrived home, Aaron took all the lists off the walls and threw them away. He forced Emily to sit on the couch, he made her some tea and sat next to her. She suddenly opened up and talked about everything she could feel since she had learned about her pregnancy. It felt good, she realized that she needed to talk more than she thought, and she invited Aaron to talk too. They told each other everything, like they had not done in a while. It made Emily realize that even if she was the one carrying this baby, she wasn't alone in this, Aaron was there for her, and she could lean on him.

For the first time, Emily instinctively put her hand on her stomach, and she invited Aaron to do the same. The ended up spending the day relaxing, and they finally started making plans and organizing things together for the next three months. A long road was still ahead of them, but the sky seemed to have cleared a little.


	17. The Others

THE OTHERS

It was a Monday morning and Emily was finally back to work. Therefore, she woke up in the same time than Aaron and got ready with him. She still had breakdowns, but it was better, she was relying on Aaron every time she could feel herself ready to burst into tears. She could definitely say that she was managing better, she didn't feel as often overwhelmed as before. But it was the first time she had to look pregnant at the White House, and everything she had tried for now was not suited for work. It was not what she was used to wear, of course, and this was utterly annoying her. She started stressing out again, and she could feel the tears coming to her eyes.

"Aaron, I need your help please…" she pleaded.

Aaron was in the bathroom and looked through the door to see dozens of clothes on the bed. He chuckled slightly.

"Em… I can see you coming with this… You don't need to worry." Aaron tried to reassure her.

"But I look fat, nothing is good enough for the White House…" Emily whined.

Aaron walked into the room still brushing his teeth, and put his hands on her shoulders. His mouth full of toothpaste, he said:

"Em… you are not fat, you are pregnant. It's just a few months. You're not the first woman pregnant at the White House, and you won't be the last. It's normal to dress differently when you are pregnant."

"Do people know at the White House ?" Emily asked worriedly.

Aaron didn't answer right away.

"Yes, they do. I didn't say anything, but someone may have overheard us talking with Seth. Kendra and Lyor know too. And so rumors started running in the West Wing, you know what it is… Someone said that he has a friend who has a friend who has a friend that works at the hospital. So basically everybody knows it."

Emily sighed loudly. She was half-pissed that everybody was talking behind her back, but in the meantime, she was relieved that she wouldn't have to explain anything to anyone. Aaron kissed her forehead, putting toothpaste on her, and then helped her choosing a dress. It was black, probably a little too fancy for the White House, and definitely not what she was used to wear at work, but at least it was comfortable. She promised herself to buy new work clothes as soon as she would be back from work in the evening.

It was 7 a.m. when they arrived at the White House. Emily could feel the lump in her throat, and rushed to her office before anyone would arrive. She might feel better, but she was not yet strong enough to spend time chatting in the hallways about this and that and have all the looks on her. She was really glad to be one of the firsts to arrive every morning. Aaron didn't even have the time to say anything that he felt abandoned in the middle of the hallway and he chuckled slightly, knowing very well why she was like that.

As the day was going by, Emily realized that it really felt good to be back to work. She had other things to think about, the baby wasn't constantly in her mind. Even if her deputies were great, she had a lot to catch up on and it was feeling good. She was a true workaholic, she loved being swamped into work.

The moment when she had been forced to leave her office for meetings and other things had come way too early in her opinion. She had sighed loudly before opening her door, and had immediately regretted when she had started walking in the hallways. Everybody was smiling at her too politely. Some were glancing at her, some were whispering, others were pitying her. They were all clinging on her stomach. Most of them had never heard of a denial of pregnancy before, they didn't know what it was and they all seemed suspicious. Was it actually possible? Was she faking it? So many people were dying to ask these questions, but would never dare. Emily was trying her best to ignore all these looks and whispers, but it was hard, and she knew it would be even harder when she would have to walk down the hallways of the Capitol. This place was full of very old-school people who had very low esteem for the place of women in the society, and some had never accepted that a woman as young as Emily could be White House Chief of Staff, so now that she was pregnant, comments would be even worse.

In the middle of the afternoon, Emily was starting to feel irritated with everybody's looks and comments on her pregnancy. She could feel that she was starting to run out of patience. She could feel that she was about to breakdown. Walking toward her office, she suddenly overheard one of her assistant talking with someone else behind a door.

"Yeah, I don't know. Is that even possible? I mean, that's weird right?" the first one said.

"I think she's faking it…" the second one added.

"What? How can she fake a pregnancy?" the first replied.

"I think she has a fake belly…"

Emily suddenly burst into the room and looked at the two whisperers, angry.

"You know what, when you'll have my job and my life, we'll talk about it. But right now, you have nothing to say. Before you open one more time your very big mouth, please check what a denial of pregnancy really is. Both of you, I want your resignation letter on my desk by the end of the day."

Before the two staffers could say anything, she stormed out of the room and ran to Aaron's office. She opened the door of his office without knocking and leaned on it after closing it behind her. All her anger suddenly transformed in tears, and she started crying, squatting down against the door. Aaron walked toward her and took her in his arms, gently running his hand in her back. It took her a couple of minutes before she could say anything.

"They…" she started. "I heard someone saying that I was faking it" she said in between two sobs.

Aaron chuckled.

"That is not funny!" Emily exclaimed.

"No that's not. But that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. How could you fake a pregnancy? I thought we only had smart people in this building, but clearly I got it wrong."

"How long before this ends?" Emily pleaded.

"Honey. You know, people will alway spread rumor, say stupid things. It's not the first time you are going through, and unfortunately it's not the last. It's just harder because it is a difficult period for you. But you know you are stronger than them, only weak people gossip about others. Strong people just ignore them…"

"About that… I fired them." Emily almost whispered.

"You what?" Aaron asked, surprised.

"I fired them. I burst into the room they were in and I yelled at them and told them to put their letter on my desk by the end of the day."

"Oh Em… You know you won't be able to fire anyone who made a stupid comment."

"I know. But it was beyond me. I couldn't help myself."

Aaron hugged Emily a little tighter and kissed her on the temple.

"Maybe we should go home, don't you think? You should probably take it slow, it's only your first day back at work." Aaron said.

"But, it's only 4 p.m… And I have things to do. I haven't even caught up with everything yet." Emily grumbled.

"Do you still have meetings, things that you must absolutely do today?"

"No. I couldn't resolve myself to go to the Capitol today. It was too much for a first day."

"Okay. So you know what? You're going back to your office, you finish what you were doing. You bring some stuff at home, and we'll just work from there. I'm sure you have something to read, don't you?"

Emily nodded.

"Okay, I'll pick you up in your office in an hour. How does that sound?"

"Great. Thank you."

She cuddled against him a little bit longer and wiped the tears off her cheeks. Sighing loudly, she stood up straight and left Aaron's office, determined to finish that day.

In the end, it's only two hours later that they finally left the White House, and Emily could say that she was proud of herself. She had managed to stay a whole day at work with only one minor breakdown. It had felt good to be back to work. Though, thinking about it, she could definitely tell that working was a way to push her pregnancy at the back of her mind. Of course, she couldn't ignore it, she had realized that she was pregnant, her belly being less than discreet and her back pretty painful. But there was a different between realizing it and accepting it. She was not yet ready to accept it. She still had a lot of work to do before that, and she was thankful to be able to see a psychologist to work with him about it. She had been surprised, she had not imagined that it would go well, she had a lot of preconceived ideas about them. But in the end, she was looking forward to her next appointment, and she knew that Aaron was too. He had had a couple of appointements with him too, and he could say that it was very helpful, even if it was in a different way. It was true, sometimes he didn't really know what to say, but these appointments were helping him to stop wondering why and how. He was just accepting the idea that this denial of pregnancy had happened instead of asking himself questions all the time. The psychologist was helping him to talk with Emily about everything. Aaron could feel that sometimes he was still walking on eggshells with his wife, he didn't know how to broad the subject of her pregnancy. He could definitely say that he could see progress in the way Emily was behaving, whether it was generally or with him, but it was still hard.

That night though, for the first time since they had learned about Emily's pregnancy, he could feel that she was in a good mood. Work really seemed to have an impact on her, and he was really grateful for that. The baby was still a subject to avoid, but they were talking, the mood was lighter than it had in a while. Maybe, they would get through this without too much damage.


	18. The Campaign

THE CAMPAIGN

Emily was now 8 months pregnant. Almost two months had passed since the surprise announcement of her pregnancy, and things had finally settled. Everything was mostly back to normal. She had overcome her fears of becoming a mother and the anxiety due to her denial, mainly thanks to the good number of appointements she had had with the psychologist and the continuous support of Aaron.

It is true, she still had weaknesses sometimes, but they had become very rare and she could control them. She could finally see herself becoming a mother, she wasn't feeling overwhelmed every time the baby was moving, she could put her hand on her belly and talk to the baby. She could even let Aaron touch her belly and talk to the baby. It had become an almost normal pregnancy, and they were both relieved about it. They had finally bought and put together most of the things they needed for the baby, the spare bedroom had finally been turned into a nursery. They could feel they were getting ready.

They had both slowed down work a lot. Aaron was always worried about Emily, he was being careful that she had enough sleep every night, that she was coming home at decent times every evening. However, they had agreed to be back on the campaign. The President had pleaded that they were both essential to it, and they had said yes. Aaron had set two conditions: When they were on campaign somewhere around the US, Aaron was not leaving Emily, it was the two of them or no one. The second was that Emily should get a day off after every trip. These trips were exhausting, and Aaron didn't want Emily to tire herself out, he knew that if she wasn't forced to stay at home, she would continue running here and there until she couldn't take it anymore. These were pretty demanding conditions, and Aaron knew that very well when he had set them, but Tom Kirkman had nonetheless agreed. He trusted Emily and Aaron more than anyone, he needed them on the campaign. Emily had also had the green light from her obstetrician to travel and take the plane. Entering her 8th month, she had started feeling very small contractions from time to time, and had rushed to her doctor the first time, scared that anything bad could happen. After a quick examination, he had reassured her that everything was fine, and it could happen and would probably happen sometimes with the due date coming close. He had told her that as long as she was taking it slow, she could have a perfectly normal life and could travel for work.

So here they were in Michigan for the day. They had landed in Detroit early in the morning, had made a meeting over there and were now on their way to Grand Rapids where they would do a second one. It was an almost three-hour drive between the two cities in a very crowded campaign bus. Emily was taking this time to rest a little, listening to Aaron who was advising the President about a controversy in a local newspaper. The said newspaper had not yet endorsed any candidate, and they hoped that this meeting could do the trick.

Emily really loved this atmosphere. She had worked as an intern on a local campaign a very long time ago, and she had promised herself that one day she would do it again. It was so much more different from the White House. It was more competitive, more challenging and this was all Emily liked. She loved to give tit for tat, she loved being able to find the little things that would make the opponent give out. They were a month away from voting day and even though things were looking good, they knew that they couldn't drop their guard and that everything could change anytime.

"Sir, I know you want the people to ask you questions tonight. But I'm not sure that is such a good idea…" Aaron said.

"No, Aaron, that is a brilliant idea, no one ever does that!" Emily argued "The President would be closer to the public like that."

"But you never know which questions will be asked. It's too dangerous. Any question could go wrong." Aaron answered.

"I know, but I think this is a calculated risk. The President is good at this. He's done that before. It always worked well. And in a region which suffered the economic crisis like that, we know what most of the questions will be about." Emily added.

"Those last times, we had had time to prepare. I honestly don't feel comfortable throwing the President in the lion's den like that." Aaron explained.

Tom Kirkman listened to all the arguments on both sides, and in the end decided to do it anyway. He was sure of his ideas and he loved being able to exchange with the public.

So here they were, after Tom Kirkman's speech. He was answering all the questions as sincerely as possible while Emily, Aaron and other staffers were listening carefully and taking notes. Emily could see that Aaron was stressed and worried something would go wrong, but she, on the other hand, was sure of the President. She knew he was good at this.

If she wasn't stressed at all for the President, she was starting to be tired of being so uncomfortable. She couldn't stop moving, her back was hurting, and she had felt a couple other contractions during the day. Aaron noticed and glanced at her in a knowing way, asking discreetly if everything was fine. But Emily was too professional to say that she was in pain, especially when they were working. It went on like that for far too long, and she could say that she was extremely relieved when everything was finally over and she could sit in a much more comfortable chair backstage.

"Em, are you okay? You look pale…" Aaron said, giving her a bottle of water.

"No, don't worry. I'm fine. I felt another couple of contractions this morning, and it's just hard for me to stay without moving for a long time. I mean, I guess it's the charm of the pregnancy. So I'm just exhausted pretty easily." Emily answered

"Wait what? Again? How often are you supposed to have contractions exactly?" Aaron questioned, worried.

"I don't know exactly to be honest, but the doctor said it was normal. So until further notice, it's normal." Emily smiled.

Aaron smiled in return, reassured that his wife seemed okay. Tom Kirkman still had a meeting to attend with the local supporters and members of the party, and Aaron offered to take Emily's spot in the meeting so that she could rest. She didn't argue. She knew that she wouldn't win the battle, but she had to say that sh was also pretty happy to be able to relax for a little longer. Also, since Aaron had been Chief of Staff before her, he knew what to do and how to address the priorities of a local support committee, so she was totally confident her husband could do it well.

Emily walked a bit further away in an empty room that had been provided for Kirkman's team. She lied down on the couch and closed her eyes, trying to focus on her breathing just like she had learned in the only two childbirth class she had had time to attend. Her back was really sore, she didn't like that. She felt another small contraction and started wondering why she was so stubborn and why she was halfway across the country only a month before giving birth to their first child. She knew it was nothing, or at least she was convincing herself that it was nothing, but truth was that she started worrying. She kept repeating in her head that her doctor had cleared her to go to Michigan, and therefore that she was okay. She would be fine.

Half an hour later, Aaron was still in this meeting with the President and the committee when someone knocked at the door.

"I'm sorry to bother you Mr. Shore, but you are needed outside."

Aaron nodded and apologized, quickly leaving the room. He could feel something was wrong.

"Your wife isn't feeling well. She is resting in the room over there, you should go see her."

Aaron thanked the staff member and walked to the said room to find Emily sitting on the couch, breathing rapidly, almost panicking.

"Em, what is going on?"

"I think I'm going to give birth here." she said, tears coming to her eyes.

"You aren't serious, are you?" he exclaimed.

"I felt more contractions over the past half hour, and my back really hurts. Not like normal pregnancy pain. I might not know much about pregnancy, but all of this isn't normal…"

Aaron sighed loudly, trying to keep it together for Emily. He could see that she really was in pain and it wasn't normal.

"But, you're only 8 months pregnant…" Aaron said, trying to stay calm.

"This pregnancy started weirdly, I don't know why it shouldn't end weirdly." Emily answered, rolling her eyes.

"Okay, we should head to the hospital, maybe it's just a false alarm. Right?"

Emily nodded and Aaron helped her stand up. He walked to the room nearby to pick up their coats and bags, but when he came back to the room where Emily was, he saw her petrified. She was standing in the middle of the room, unable to move, and wetness on the floor.

"My water just broke…" Emily said, her voice shaking.

Aaron gulped. His heart started speeding and he could suddenly feel himself freak out.

"We should go."


	19. The Arrival

THE ARRIVAL

They rushed to the nearest hospital downtown and Emily was immediately taken care of. She still had contractions, and even though they had not really intensified over the past couple of hours, she knew it was it, she would give birth halfway across the country. She was really scared. She had been aware of her pregnancy for barely two months, and she would now give birth a month early. Why was all of this happening to her? She had barely had the time to get used to being pregnant and to actually accept that she would become a mother under these circumstances. She had been gripped to Aaron's hand in the past two hours, she needed him by her side. He was trying to reassure her, but she could see that he was freaking out too.

"Mrs. Shore, I'm Dr. Anderson. I'll take care of you today." a man said, entering Emily's room. "I just received your patient file from Washington. You had a denial of pregnancy, right?"

That is correct yes. But what does it have to do with everything?" Emily said, annoyed and angry. "I'm in labor right now!"

Aaron put his free hand on her arm, trying to reassure her.

"The last midwife who came said that you are only two centimeters dilated. Your water already broke, so we feel like it is not going fast enough…" the doctor continued.

"Meaning?" Emily asked sharply.

"I'm not saying that to scare you, but we might consider a c-section."

Aaron could feel Emily tense under his hand. She was on the verge of exploding. He pressed his hand a little more on her arm, trying to calm her down, but it was already too late.

"What? No way! No freaking way I'm having a c-section!" Emily started yelling. "I'm done with all this crap, I want a normal end of pregnancy!"

She was irritated and irritable, and a sudden contraction stronger than the other ones called her to order. She burst into tears, wincing. It wasn't even the pain that really made her cry, but more the news of the c-section. She was already so tired of all of this, it had been a long day at work, she was not at home, and she was nowhere near ready to give birth.

"Mrs. Shore, I get it. We will do everything in our power to avoid the c-section. But you need to be prepared to the possibility of it. We usually consider that the baby must be born maximum 24 hours after the water breaks. You still have time, it's not a certainty yet." the doctor tried to reassure. "I'll leave you to it, one of our midwives will come back soon to see how things are going."

Dr. Anderson left the room, and Emily started sobbing uncontrollably. Aaron rose from the seat he had taken and took her in his arms, trying to soothe her. She looked desperate, she was emotionally exhausted from all of this.

"Why can't I have a normal pregnancy?" Emily asked in between two sobs.

"I don't know Em, I guess it was just meant to be. I don't know. But you'll be okay". Aaron said, kissing her on the temple.

"Stop saying that, please just stop. Nothing is okay. Nothing!" Emily continued crying.

Emily was really panicking, and it looked like nothing and no-one could make her be okay.

"I hate this freaking obgyn in Washington! Why did he clear me to go to Michigan? I don't want to give birth in the middle of nowhere!" Emily exclaimed.

"Emily, you are not in the middle of nowhere…" Aaron chuckled. "I know it's overwhelming, but you can do this. I know you can. And I'm here with you. I'm not leaving your side."

A nurse came in the room. It was someone else that Emily had never seen before, and Emily felt instantly annoyed. She was tired of all these people looking in between her legs.

"I want this to already be over…" Emily whined, more to herself than anyone else.

"There are a few ways to speed up the dilatation of the cervix" the nurse started. "A walk could help, or climbing stairs. It will push on your cervix. An orgasm could help too…"

Emily opened her eyes wide and cut short the nurse.

"Do I really look like I want to have sex right now?" she screamed, shooting a death glare at the nurse.

Aaron laughed and excused his wife. The nurse didn't say anything else and left the room, feeling bad that she could have caused such a sputter.

"How can you laugh right now? I'm in pain and that stupid woman is saying stupid things!" Emily yelled at her husband.

"Honey. I'm sorry, I really am. But you should have seen this poor nurse, so confused when you yelled at her." Aaron said.

"She should be! This is the dummest thing I've ever heard. How could I even want to have sex right now!?" she exclaimed.

"Ok, slow down." Aaron tried to temper. "You know what, we should go for a walk. It's gonna clear your head, and maybe it will help. Okay?"

He helped Emily rise from the bed, and he put his hand around her back. She was absolutely capable to walk, but Aaron wasn't feeling like letting her go. They left the room and walked down the hallway and used the stairs to go down to the first floor. They walked outside in the small park behind the hospital, slowly but surely. Emily stopped several times, as she could feel contractions coming. Her mind was racing, she couldn't stop thinking about everything, and yet, she was feeling exhausted from all of this. She was wondering why everything was happening, why everything was so complicated.

"How are you feeling?" Aaron asked, breaking the silence.

"Except when I have contractions, for now I'm ok…" Emily answered. "But I don't think walking is changing anything…"

"We'll walk some more. It cannot come just like that, we haven't walked for that long." Aaron said, trying to reassure her.

In reality, Aaron was scared, his heart was pounding, and he didn't know if he could handle all of this. Since all of this had happened, he had tried to be strong for his wife, tried to reassure her but the imminent arrival of their first child was making him sweat. Was he really going to become a dad in less than 24 hours? How would all of this happen? It was true, they were halfway across the country, how would they bring back their child to D.C.? How long would they stay there, considering the baby would be born premature? What about work? What about all the things they had bought for the baby and left in D.C.? Aaron was trying to stay pragmatic and poised, but sometimes he felt like all of this weight was too much for his shoulders. It was crazy, he had dealt with terror attacks, conspirations and all those terrible things, but the idea of becoming a father was making him freak out.

"Aaron!" Emily stopped suddenly and looked at him.

"What?" Aaron answered, worried.

"We didn't even call our parents. Nobody knows we are stuck here…"

Aaron sighed, relieved. He had really thought something important was happening.

"Oh. Right… I'll call them later, don't worry." Aaron said. "Don't make me freak out like this, I thought there was something wrong…"

"Sorry…" she apologized. "You'll do that? Call my parents and yours?"

"Of course I will. Except if you want to do it now and call your parents…"

"I don't know. I'm not sure I'm ready…"

Aaron looked at Emily, wondering what she was talking about. Wasn't she ready to call her parents? Or to give birth? Or wasn't she ready to be a mother? He gave her an interrogative look and she continued.

"What should I tell them? That I'm giving birth a month early halfway across the country?"

"Well, since it is the truth, I think so yes…" Aaron chuckled.

Emily sat on the bench in the park and asked for Aaron's phone. She called her parents, it was 9 p.m. and she realized that her mom would probably not fall asleep knowing she was about to become a grandmother again, but it was too late, the phone was already ringing. As she had imagined, her mom started crying of happiness, and booked a flight to Grand Rapids for the next morning. When she hung up, Aaron and Emily walked back to the hospital. Trying to monitor her contractions, she realized that they were a little closer to each other, and were starting to be more intense. They sat in the cafeteria and Emily decided to eat a little, even if the doctor had advised her not to. He had not totally forbidden her, he had just told her not to eat solid food, so she took the opportunity to regain her strengths. She was quite surprised, except when she was having contractions, she was still feeling pretty fine.

When they were back to her room a little while later, a nurse came back to check on Emily. Her walk had barely done anything and she was only three centimeters dilated. She grumbled, annoyed that it wasn't going faster, and started feeling a lump in her throat. The thought of the c-section came back to her mind, and she started freaking out again. She stood up again, deciding to go for another walk, but Aaron stopped her. It was already 11 p.m. He advised her to try and get some sleep while she still could. They argued for a little, but a big yawn made Emily realize that Aaron was right. Closing her eyes, she fell asleep almost instantly.

In the end, both of them managed to sleep for a little. Emily was woken up every time she could feel a contraction, and Aaron had dozed off on the chair next to his wife. He had not really slept, he was still exhausted. Every time Emily had moved because of a contraction, he had jolted, worried for her. Also, he couldn't stop being stressed about this birth. He was worried Emily would need a c-section, and he knew she wouldn't be able to handle it. He didn't know why it was stressing Emily that much to potentially have a c-section, but he could see in her eyes that she was really scared about it. So around 8 a.m., Emily decided to climb stairs to help dilate her cervix. She couldn't handle it anymore. Back and forth for an hour, she climbed and went down the stairs, irritated and in pain. Aaron was following her, worried she would fall in the stairs, but didn't even know what to say. Sometimes, he was asking Emily to take it slow, because she had been told to take it slow to keep her strength for the birth, but she wouldn't listen to anyone. She was so stubborn. When they came back to the room, Emily was checked again, and she sighed in relief. She was seven centimeters now. It was getting better, and she started having hope again that she could give birth naturally. She closed her eyes for a little bit, resting after having climbed all these stairs. Aaron took that time to escape the room for a little bit and call his family. He called his parents, and of course, Adriana cried. She was so happy for him. And then, he called his brother. He wasn't calling him that often, it's not that they weren't close, it's just that they rarely felt the need to call each other. But this time, he really needed to. Javier had two kids, so he knew what it was like to become a dad. And Aaron needed to tell him everything, how he felt, how scared he was, how worried. He even shed a tear, and when he hung up, he realized that he missed his family a lot. Of course, he had Nadia in Washington. The city felt a little bit more like home since she had moved there, but still, having one cousin with him couldn't replace all his family. He put his head in his hands and closed his eyes a little bit. He wasn't sleeping, of course he wasn't, he was in the middle of a hallway with people coming and going all the time. But it was calming him down a little bit. He realized that he was still wearing his shirt from the day before, he had just untied his tie and taken the jacket of his suit off. He walked to the bathroom to splash some water on his face and looked at him in the mirror. His hair was not holding with gel anymore, he looked disheveled and he wanted nothing more but going to bed. He had shadows under his eyes. He had not even booked a room in a hotel nearby, and he had no clothes to change in. He had not really slept properly in the last 36 hours, and he wished he could deal with a national crisis right now, it just looked easier.

When he came out of the bathroom, he saw his parents-in-law arriving from afar. He had never been more happy to see a familiar face, and walked toward them.

"Aaron, how are you? How is Emily feeling?" Sharon said, hugging him.

"She is fine, she is resting. Last time they checked, she was 7 centimeters dilated, she might be able to give birth normally. That would be a huge relief for her." Aaron answered, his voice trembling.

"That would be great. How about you?" Peter, asked.

"I'm tired… and worried… and stressed… I'm just really worried for Emily. I don't know how she will handle all of this…" Aaron explained honestly. "And I really wished the baby was born in Washington, and not a month early." Aaron chuckled.

"Did you get some sleep at all?" Sharon continued.

"Barely, I just dozed off last night, but Emily was woken up with every contraction so I wasn't really in a mood for sleeping…"

"Ha, don't worry. It's the charm of becoming a father." Peter chuckled. "I can remember the day Sharon gave birth to Dan as if it was yesterday. It was hell."

Hell. At least it made Aaron laugh. This could sum up pretty well what Aaron was feeling right now, and he was ready for it to be over. He talked some more with Emily's parents and they offered to book a room for Aaron and to get some clothes for both Emily and him to change. He was so grateful to have Sharon and Peter as in-laws right now. They were the kindest persons on Earth and in that moment, he swore to never ever complain about them.

He walked back with them to Emily's room. She was more or less dozing but woke up to the door opening. She smiled weakly, happy to see her parents but still tired. She was mentally and physically exhausted. She hugged them tight, relieved that Aaron and her weren't alone in this. She talked a little bit with them, but they were asked to leave when a nurse came to check on her. It was finally coming. She was 9 centimeters dilated, and it was now almost sure she would be able to deliver the baby naturally. She was asked one more time if she wanted an epidural, telling her that it was now or never, but she shook her head. The good news had given her courage, she would do it the most natural way possible.

It was about 2 p.m when everything started to move faster. Emily could feel it was coming, and being checked once more, people started hurrying around her. Aron was there, holding her hand tight, and the obgyn asked Emily to push. She pushed again and again, every single time she could feel a contraction. The pain was excruciating, tears were rolling down her cheeks, she couldn't even notice it. She was crushing Aaron's hand, screaming in pain. She was sweating, her cheeks were red from pushing. Aaron was putting his other hand behind her back every time she would push, trying to help her the best he could. His heartbeat was fast. They were becoming parents, it was it. He was so proud of his wife, she was giving birth to their baby without an epidural. He knew that she was strong, but right now, he was admiring her. Soon enough, they heard the obgyn say that the head was out, and Aaron and Emily shared a look, him telling her that she could do it. But Emily could feel her strengths leaving her. She was breathing fast, she was exhausted. It felt worse than running a marathon. She could feel her baby coming, it was the weirdest feeling in the world. She was asked to push once more, but she was less strong. It was harder to push, and it took her all the courage in the world. But suddenly, the shoulders were out, and the baby was born. Emily cried, Aaron cried. Their baby was here.

"Congratulations, it's a girl!"


	20. The Instinct

THE INSTINCT

5.6 lbs, 17.5 inches. Inez Emily Shore was born a month early and after the biggest surprise in the life of her parents. But she was here, in this incubator. It had taken them a couple of hours to choose a name, they had not really thought about it. But Aaron was sure of one thing, he wanted to give his daughter a Mexican name. Emily had not really put a fight, she knew she would lose the battle, she was too tired to fight, and she liked Mexican names anyway. So here it was, Inez. They had not chosen a middle name either, but Aaron had instantly seen the courage of this little baby, her strength, being born one month early but still so healthy and beautiful, exactly like her mom. So he had suggested Emily. His wife had looked at him weirdly, she wasn't really comfortable with giving her own name to her daughter, but she had agreed. Inez Emily Shore. She had been in this world for the past 24 hours, but she was already making life more beautiful. Her dad was holding her tiny little hand through the hole of the incubator, admiring how such a tiny thing could be so beautiful. It was theirs, their daughter, and all he could feel was joy and love for her. He knew she would stay there for at least a few more days, probably a few more weeks, the time for her to get strong enough to face the world, but he was over the moon. He had been able to hold her and give her the bottle, and it had been the most incredible experience of his life. He had cried, letting tears fall down his cheeks, afraid he would break this tiny little thing he was holding in his arms. He still couldn't believe it.

As for her, Emily had spent the day resting in her bedroom in the hospital, but her feelings were mixed. She had hold her daughter in her arms, but she couldn't really realize it was hers. Even after all the pain she had been through with giving birth to her, even after feeling her in her womb for two months, she couldn't realize it. She had been asked if she wanted to feed her, and she had refused. She wasn't ready. She just wasn't. She had withdrawn into herself, not really expressing her emotions, whether it was to Aaron or to her parents who were still there. She had been to the neonatal unit only once, pushed by her parents, and she had looked at Inez Emily Shore, but she had not felt much. She thought it was just the exhaustion from the delivery, that it would come, but truth be told, she wasn't really feeling much of a mother. She had hoped that the instinct would kick in when giving birth to her, seeing her for the first time, but it had not. She had not shown the will to go and see her baby more often, she had not shown any interest in feeding her, and she was just feeling empty.

Of course, Aaron had noticed Emily's behavior. He had talked with his in-laws about it, but he didn't want to pressure her. The psychologist they had met several times had explained it could happen, that it was not because she was accepting the pregnancy that she would feel the maternal instinct kick in like that. But deep in his heart, it was hurting him that Emily wasn't showing any love for this little thing that was half of both of them. It felt to him as if Inez didn't have a mother, and it was hard, because he knew it wasn't true.

Though, after 24 hours, Emily was finally ready to leave the hospital. So Aaron walked to her room as she was getting ready. She had shadows under her eyes, was still exhausted, but she was ready to escape this place. It was late in the evening, and her mom had brought her clothes to get more comfortable. So she was getting dressed, looking at herself in the mirror of the bathroom of her hospital room, she was hating herself, her body was completely deformed. She quickly put clothes on, looking away from the mirror, put her short hair in a bun, and left the room. Aaron had come inside in the meantime, ready to take her to the hotel where they would stay for the time Inez was staying in neonatal care. She kissed him slowly, pure habit of doing this when he was coming in somewhere.

"Do you want to go see Inez before going to the hotel?" Aaron asked, wrapping an arm around her, making Emily shiver.

"Yeah, sure…" Emily answered blankly.

She didn't really want to say no, she knew it would hurt Aaron and she was in no mood for a fight with him. So Aaron took Emily's bag in his hand, and they left the room, checking everything was in order. They walked to the lower floor where the neonatal care was, and walked into the room where all the premature babies were, in their incubators. They crossed the path of one of the nurses, and they talked for a bit, asking how Inez was really doing, but Aaron was doing most of the talking. Emily was only half-listening, the cries of all the babies overwhelming her. The nurse opened the incubator and took Inez, giving her to Aaron whose eyes were shining with pride and happiness. He was genuinely the happiest man on earth, and Emily's heart broke a little, realizing she was mostly indifferent to this. How could she be indifferent to her baby girl? She couldn't understand it was possible, but it was just how it was.

"Do you want to feed her? She should be hungry by now…" Aaron tried.

It took a few seconds to realize what Aaron had asked, but Inez was already in her arms, and she was feeling confused about what to do or not. It was the first time she would feed Inez, and it was feeling weird to her. She sat in the chair next to the incubator, being very careful with her daughter's head, still so fragile. Emily was not sure how to behave, how to do. The nurse came with a bottle and explained Emily how to do it, how to know whether it was too warm or not for the baby. Emily felt confused, not really sure she would be able to do all that by herself when Inez would be out of the hospital. Emily took the bottle in her free hand, sat up a bit to be comfortable enough with Inez in her arms, and put the teat of the bottle in her daughter's tiny mouth. Inez quickly latched onto it and started drinking. It was the weirdest feeling Emily had ever had. She was feeding her daughter, but she couldn't quite realize it that much yet. Aaron was looking at her, the most beautiful woman of earth feeding the most beautiful daughter on earth. He was over the moon, it made him smile, and took his phone out of his pocket to take a picture of those two, his precious girls. Deep inside though, he felt his heart breaking a little, he knew Emily wasn't feeling the way she should as a new mom, he knew it wasn't normal that Emily was feeling so out of it.

A few hours later, Aaron and Emily were in their hotel room, laying on the bed. They had had dinner with Emily's parents, the topic had revolved around Inez all the time, and Emily had been mostly listening to everybody around her being enthralled with the newborn. She had changed into comfy pyjamas and had put her head on Aaron's chest, Aaron enveloping her with his arm. She was silent, not knowing what to say or what to think, and she was glad Aaron was accepting this so kindly, not wanting to pressure her into saying anything. Aaron could feel how heavy the atmosphere was. But he didn't want to break this silence, didn't want to force Emily into saying anything she wasn't ready to, and they ended up falling asleep like that.

In the middle of the night, Emily woke up with a start and sat up, breathing heavily. She thought she had heard a baby cry, but realized nobody was there, she was alone with her husband in their hotel room. Her jolt had woken up Aaron who tried to reassure her while she was still breathing heavily.

"Hey, hey, you're ok, it's ok… Em, what is going on?" Aaron asked.

"I… just thought I heard a baby crying. I think I was having a bad dream, and I heard a baby cry and it woke me up…"

"No one is crying, you are okay, everything is okay." Aaron put his arm around her shoulders.

It took some time for Emily to feel okay, and Aaron stood up to give her a glass of water. She drank it in one go, and tried to regain composure, focusing on her breathing.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Aaron tried.

"I … I don't know. I just… Why don't I feel like I am a mom? Why don't I feel anything when I hold her? And still, I'm worried to hear her crying, it wakes me up during the night… Am I crazy?" Emily explained.

Aaron pulled Emily into him, letting their heads fall on the pillows, and cuddling her.

"I'm sure it will come. It will just take time. You told it yourself, you didn't have a normal pregnancy, it's probably just normal, just don't give up already, you'll feel the instinct kick in." Aaron reassured her, kissing her temple.

"It's just that… I wanted so much to feel this instinct, for it to kick in when I gave birth to her. But I just don't feel anything. I thought not having an epidural would help me, I thought I would actually feel her coming to this world, but it was just painful, and nothing happened." Emily said.

"Is it why you wanted so much to avoid the c-section or the epidural?" Aaron wondered.

"I think so yeah…" Emily paused. "Yeah, I was just afraid it would prevent me from being a mom."

"Maybe you should talk to the psychologist, he would probably help you with that. Not that I don't want to help you, but I cannot say that I've been through this the same way that you have."

"Yeah, you're right…"

"We should go back to sleep, I promise it will be okay."

The following days passed with the same rhythm, spending a good part of their day in the hospital, checking on their daughter. Emily was forcing herself to feed her and change her, hoping the maternal instinct would come. Aaron was still over the moon, he couldn't take his eyes off of his daughter, he could have kept her in his arms forever. The doctors had told them she would be able to leave the hospital in about a week, and Aaron and Emily booked a flight to come back to D.C. with her. They were both a bit afraid of how this would go, but this was the only realistic solution to go back there. Renting a car and driving hours with an infant was out of question. Aaron's parents had booked a flight to come visit in Washington. They would be there for a good week, helping the new little family with all the adjustments of having to take care of a baby on their own. But more importantly, Emily and Aaron were already thinking of going back to work. After the first couple of days completely shut from the world, they had turned their professional phones back on, receiving hundreds of messages of congratulations, and they had started again taking a couple of phone calls. The campaign was still going on, and they had turned the TV back on to follow the polls and interviews. They obviously weren't working that much, but they were happy to take calls from the President to advise him on certain questions, it was feeling good.

It was a Thursday morning, and Inez was supposed to leave the hospital the next Monday. Aaron and Emily arrived the hospital to see how their daughter was going. She had put weight on, and grown a bit, and they were hoping to take off the ventilation in the day. Aaron had fed her and she was now sleeping peacefully in her dad's arms. Emily was truly impressed by Aaron, how easy all of this seemed to him, how happy he was when he was with her. He decided to put her back in her incubator to let her sleep some more, and while he was talking with Emily about how much she had grown in only a few days, they heard the monitor that was checking her heartbeat starting to beep. They both looked at the monitor, worried, and they saw her heartbeat going down. Suddenly, they were pushed outside the room and way too many people were rushing to take care of Inez. They didn't know what was happening, and they both started to cry, looking through the window of the room. They couldn't even see what was happening, they could only recognize two of the nurses and one pediatrician taking care of Inez. They didn't know how all of this was possible, she looked fine the minute before, and they were suddenly about to lose her. Emily felt like her heart was being broken in a million of pieces, she squatted down against the wall, putting her head in her hands, and started sobbing. Aaron was still looking through the window, tears falling down his cheeks, his heart pounding. They stayed there for what seemed like hours, waiting desperately for news, but nothing was coming. Had they just lost their baby girl?

Suddenly, the pediatrician came out of the room and walked toward them.

"She's fine. She will be fine…" he reassured them.

Emily and Aaron sighed of relief. They both gulped, taking each other in their arms, and thanked the pediatrician.

"What happened? Can we see her?" Aaron asked.

"She has what we call arrhythmia, it happens sometimes with premature babies. Her heartbeat dropped suddenly, but it came back, we took care of it. It most probably will disappear on its own in a few days or months, you'll just need to take her to the pediatrician in Washington more often. You can see her, but go slow for now." the doctor answered.

They walked back to the neonatal care room where she was, and stood on each side of the incubator. They both took one of Inez hand in theirs, and looked at her through the glass of her incubator.

"Don't even dare doing that again, we love you so much" Emily said.


	21. The Election

THE ELECTION

Aaron and Emily had been back to D.C. with Inez for less than two weeks, and she was a month old. She had grown a lot, and the arrhythmia she had suffered had not come up again for now. They had been relieved, and hoped it would never come again. Aaron's parents had come for a week, helping the new parents to adjust, but after their departure two days ago, they had been dealing on their own, and they could start feeling it was not that fun anymore. Inez was of course not yet sleeping through the night, and she was very demanding. The days had been interestingly intense, but they wouldn't trade it for the world. After Inez's little scare, Emily had realized how much she meant for her, and since then, she was fully committed to her new job of mother. It was as if everything had fallen into place, everything had suddenly become logical. Sometimes, she was still questioning her ability to take care of a baby and to be a mother, but she was being constantly reassured by her husband, friends and family.

Aaron and Emily had both been back to work at one point, supervising a bit what was happening at the White House, but still letting their deputies deal with everything. When Aaron was at work, Emily was home to take or Inez, and vice-versa. They both knew they wouldn't be able to continue like that for long and they would have to start thinking about nannies, daycare and all the options they had while at work. Emily was starting to worry about all of this, and though she loved her job a lot, she wasn't sure she wanted to leave her still so young baby to go back to work.

Today though, everybody was tense, it was election day. It was it. Tom Kirkman would be reelected president of the United States. Or at least they hoped he would. Tom Kirkman was spending the day working in his, for now, office, but mostly waiting for the results to come in. It was a bit as if everything was in stand-by today. Everybody was worried, even though the polls had been good until yesterday. Everybody in the White House was wondering whether they would have to pack their offices or not, and they all knew that even if Tom Kirkman was winning, he would probably make changes in his team. Emily and Aaron were both worried about it too, they knew that Inez being there was changing a lot of things, even though Kirkman had asserted they would keep their jobs.

It was noon, and Aaron was back from the White House where he had spent the morning, making sure everything was fine over there. Emily had been preparing lunch and taking care of Inez, who was now sleeping in her swing. Aaron greeted Emily with a kiss, and started observing his daughter peacefully asleep.

"How was she this morning?" Aaron asked.

"Better than last night at least, I heard you waking up like what, three times?" Emily answered.

"Four actually…"

"Ha… Now that makes sense. I understand better why she was falling asleep on her bottle earlier… You still managed to go to work this morning?"

"Yeah, I mean, sleeping four hours a night is no more than what we were used to before her…"

"I'm sorry… I'll take care of her tonight."

Emily wrapped her arms around her husband's waist and cuddled against his chest.

"How are we going to do after the election? How are going to handle if we are called in the middle of the night?" Emily asked.

"I actually have good news for you… Well, I hope that's good news for you…"

Emily raised her head, looking at Aaron.

"I saw Kirkman this morning. He offered me to go back to being Chief of Staff after the election, granted that he wins…"

"What? But? What about my job! He asserted we were both keeping our jobs!" Emily exclaimed, worried.

"He actually offered me to be co-Chief of Staff, with you. This way, we would share the workload, we would both work during the day, and when daycare closes, one of us can go home while the other would stay at work. So if we are called in the middle of the night, only one of us would have to go…"

"But no president has ever done than before. That would be really bad for the public eyes. He would pay two people to do one job." Emily worried.

"He won't run again in four years anyway, so I don't think he really cares about that…" Aaron chuckled.

"So we would be two Chiefs of Staff? And who would be National Security Adviser then?" Emily wondered.

"Well, he asked me to vet people and to find a good replacement, so I'll decide who replaces me."

"He really has a lot of esteem for you."

"He has for you too. That's why he wants you to take it slow. You know he considers you as a daughter…"

"I know. Sometimes I miss this time when he was only HUD Secretary."

"You miss not knowing me?" Aaron teased.

Emily slapped Aaron gently on the chest and went back to stirring the vegetables in the pan. They took their time, having their phone on ringtone in case anything important was popping, but in the end, the day was pretty slow, apart from their deputies calling for one thing or another.

In the middle of the afternoon, they went out with Inez for the first time in her stroller. They had not dared to go out before, they were afraid she was still too fragile to face the world full of bacterias. They knew they were crazy parents, everybody around had told them, but still, they had not listened. So today, they walked the 10 minutes to go to the polling place, and waited there to vote. It was kinda ironic that Inez's first trip outside was to a polling place, she was already following her parents' steps into politics. They crossed the path of a few colleagues and chatted with them, presenting Inez here and there, but still protecting her, not wanting anyone to touch her. They were relieved, she had slept during most of the walk, so people were not tempted to touch her or take her in their arms, which would have made both Aaron and Emily very uncomfortable. The thing with living in D.C. and having such a public job was that they knew pretty much everybody in politics, and they ended up crossing the path of a lot of people working on the Hill, chit-chatting about how the President was feeling on this election day, or how everybody thought this would turn out. There wasn't a real secret in all of this, everybody knew who Emily and Aaron were working for, so even if it was a secret ballot, they all knew who was voting for who.

Early in the evening, Emily and Aaron got ready and decided to head to the Capitol One Arena which had been rented by Kirkman's team for the night. Since Kirkman had never held any public office before becoming president, he had never been elected anywhere, and had never felt the need to "go back home" to win. It was actually one of his biggest drawbacks, he didn't have a place where he could actually secure votes, just like all the other presidents in history could.

The charm of being parents of a newborn was that they needed a whole bag of things for her. Bottles, diapers, pacifiers, spare clothes, and teddy bears. Since they knew they would spend most of the night there, they also took small pillows to make Inez's stroller more comfortable, putting them all around her. They checked they had everything at least four times before actually being ready to go, and then finally left. They put Inez in her baby car seat at the back of the car, and Emily sat next to her, worried something would go wrong. Inez had been in the car only two other times when they had gone to the pediatrician after being back from Grand Rapids. Aaron hated that, he felt like he was driving a taxi with no one on the passenger seat next to him, and he hoped that Emily would soon come back at the front of the car.

It was almost 9 p.m. when the first results started coming in, and everything was looking good for now. Most of the East coast states had voted Democrat, but it wasn't a big surprise for all of them. They were mostly worried for the more rural areas and also the swing states, that were surprisingly numerous this year. The whole press was there, and Aaron and Emily were trying to stay away from it, even if they had both accepted to comment for a couple of newspapers and networks when the results would come in. They could see Seth trying to deal with the pool, eager to already have comments on the first results, while they of course knew nobody would say anything until the results were clear and certain. They had met Lyor and Kendra too, who were chatting here and there with different people, but the main topic of conversation was Inez, whether her parents were in the conversation or not. Everybody had wanted to meet the little wonder. Aaron and Emily felt quite uncomfortable with all of the attention, but were trying to ignore all of it. Seth came back behind the stage at that moment, hiding from all the press.

"Gosh, I wish I still was a baby" he started, looking at Inez. "She looks so peaceful, and at least nobody bothers her with stupid questions…"

Inez started grumbling at that time.

"You wish you were pooping in a diaper and crying all night long for a bottle of milk? Are you sure you are okay?" Emily laughed

"Ok, ok. You're right… That was a bit weird to say. But come on, why do they always keep asking questions when they know we won't answer before the results are official…" Seth continued

"Maybe cause that's their job?" Aaron tried.

"What a weird job then… I'm so glad I'm not on their side…" Seth chuckled.

Inez started crying a bit more, and Seth went to her, wanting desperately to take her in his arms. He looked at her parents and asked.

"Can I?"

"Only if you give her the bottle too, cause that's the only thing that will make her happy at that time…" Aaron said.

Seth didn't even answer and moved to take her in his arms. He suddenly became completely gaga with her, babbling with her, talking about how crazy the press was, and how she should never work in politics. Emily prepared the bottle and gave it to Seth, who sat on the couch to feed Inez.

"I knew that a bottle given by Uncle Seth would be better than one given by daddy and mommy. Right? I'm sure it's much better, you see, you don't even cry anymore." Seth exclaimed, talking to Inez who was already starting to doze off on the bottle.

Aaron and Emily looked at each other, laughing at Seth's monologue to an unresponsive baby, but actually pretty okay not to have to feed her for once. Emily took her phone in her hand and took a picture of Seth giving Inez her bottle, smiling in front of the picture. Seth was perfect with Inez, he was Uncle Perfect. Both Aaron and Emily took this opportunity to leave the room and find Tom Kirkman. They knew he was there somewhere, and wanted to know how he was doing, it was a very stressing day for him, and they didn't want to ever deal with that in their lives. They already had enough stress with being senior advisers, so actually running for any position was a no-go for them.

They ended up finding him in a small room away from everything, where nobody could distract him. They talked for a bit with him, trying to ease the situation.

"Did you already get rid of your daughter?" Kirkman laughed when he saw them coming in the room.

"Well… About that…" Aaron continued, joking. "No, we just left her with Seth. He was tired of the press, so he thought that a baby would be less work…"

"Ha! You'll have to tell me everything when he discovers the truth about children!" Kirkman joked.

"For sure! And I'm guessing it will come sooner rather than later…" Emily added.

Other results had come, and the margin had been reduced drastically, so they knew that the next few would be decisive. They excused themselves a little later, letting the President continue writing his speeches, the one in which he wins, the one in which he loses. Kirkman didn't really know how to do all this, it was just very disturbing for him, it was the first time he was running for any election, and still, he was running for the highest position of all, the one he was already in.

Aaron and Emily went back to see how Seth was dealing with Inez, just to realize that she had fallen asleep in his arms and he was putting her back in her stroller. Seth was checking on her, looking on his phone what the press had leaked about the upcoming results. Aaron and Emily were starting to do the same, making calls in the states where results were still to come.

It was starting to be late, and everybody around them was starting to pace, getting crazy. If the next couple of states to fall were blue, they were good for 4 more years. But they were states that were never sure to be blue. So everybody was worried. Emily and Aaron could feel a knot in their stomach, they were going back and forth between rooms and people. They met Lyor, who was interestingly confident about everything compared to anybody else. Florida was the one that was worrying everybody. It had become a swing state in the last couple of weeks, it was the one which would seal the deal. But Lyor was sure of himself, probably thanks to his tactics and phlegm. Sometimes, he was a pain, but yet, he didn't stop amazing people around him. Suddenly, everybody's phones were ringing in echo.

"Florida's blue! We won! We got 4 more years!"


	22. The Body

The last 2/3 of the chapter are **rated M**. Be warned ;)

* * *

THE BODY

Emily had given birth to Inez two months ago. Since then, her life had been full of emotions, from becoming a mother, accepting it, to fearing losing her little girl, and having her job renewed for the next four years. But inside, she was still a mess. No, she was okay with being a mom, but she was not okay with herself anymore, with her body. Every single time she was looking at herself in the mirror, the only thing she could see was her new body. She was feeling fat, even though she had gained only a few pounds during her pregnancy. Her belly was not as taut as it used to be, she had stretch marks all over her body, especially on her breasts and her stomach, her skin was dry and even moisturizing it every day was not enough, she was still losing hair, her breasts were swollen even though she wasn't breastfeeding, and she was sweating like a pig. Added to the fact that she was constantly tired and had dark shadows under her eyes, honestly, this was a terrible time for her. She really needed a change, she was getting fed up with everything, and especially with herself. She had gone to the White House a couple of times, cause let's be honest, staying away from it was not her type, but it was her only break from being a mom. She had even brought Inez once because Aaron needed to be there too and they were not quite ready to leave her to a babysitter. But most of her days were still at home, feeding Inez, changing her, putting her to bed, not always in the same order, and she was struggling with it.

It was a Sunday morning, Aaron had quickly hopped to the White House to get some papers. After feeding Inez for the first time of the morning, Emily had put her down for a nap, and gone to the bathroom, finally taking the time to shower. She undressed and quickly ran under it, not daring to look at herself in the mirror. The water started running down her body, and she started thinking again, her hands on her body reminding her of how fat she thought she had become. She could feel the loose skin of her body under her hands, and she started swallowing hard. A knot had built in her stomach, she almost thought she would vomit, but she didn't. Tears started falling down her cheeks, she quickly finished showering, wrapped herself in a towel and exited the shower. She pushed herself against the wall and let herself slide against it, sobbing.

It was 11 a.m. and Aaron was already back from the White House. It was Sunday though, so he wasn't feeling that bad about it, he had just gone there to get some papers and bring them back home, willing to read some stuff while taking care of his girls for the day. He entered the apartment, and was surprised not to hear anyone. He took off his coat and his shoes, and put the papers on the table of the living room. He quickly checked into his daughter's room to found her sound asleep, peaceful. But still, no Emily. The apartment wasn't big though, and after looking for her in the bedroom, where he thought she could have fallen asleep, he heard muffled sounds coming from the bathroom. He knocked quickly and opened the door to find his wife in a corner of the room, completely wet and only wrapped with a towel, crying.

"Emily, honey… What is going on?" Aaron asked, squatting down in front of her.

"Nothing…" Emily tried.

"I know you… You're not crying when nothing's wrong…" he said, putting his hands on hers.

"Don't touch me, please…" she started shaking. "I'm disgusting" Emily continued crying.

"What?" Aaron exclaimed, surprised.

"I … I'm just ugly, I just can't. Just don't look at me" she stated.

Aaron was surprised with Emily's comment. Of course, he had realized that he had not seen his wife naked since she had given birth, or not even in her underwear. Of course he had realized that she was hiding herself under very large clothes that did not suit her figure. He knew all that. But he had not realized how bad it was. He thought she was just adjusting to all of this, that this was just normal for a new mom to deal with that, and he thought Emily was dealing with it her own way.

"Sweetheart, why are you saying that?" Aaron asked.

"Because it's true! I'm ugly! I have stretch marks everywhere, I am fat, my boobs are sore, my skin is itching, my belly's still loose. I can't look at myself in the mirror, and I don't want you to put an eye on me, I'm a monster!" Emily stated, tears still falling down her cheeks.

Aaron raised and took Emily's hands, helping her to stand up too. He put a finger under her chin, raising her face so that she would look at him in the eyes.

"Emily… You are beautiful, inside and outside…" he started.

"No!" Emily cut him short.

"Emily, let me finish" Aaron continued, not taking no for an answer. "You are my wife, I love you, inside, and outside. What you are experiencing right now is normal. You gave birth to our daughter two months ago. Your body changed, some things will go back to the way they used to be, some won't, it will take time to get used to all of this. I don't care about how loose your belly is, I don't care about what weight you gained or not, I don't care about any of this. I just love you."

Aaron untied the knot Emily had made with her towel and let it fall on the floor. Emily immediately bent to take it back, but before she could, she was stopped by Aaron, who took her hand and walked with her in front of the mirror. He placed himself behind her and forced her to look at herself, tracing patterns with his fingers all along the stretch marks she had.

"These stretch marks" he started, his fingers on the stretches of her breasts "are the marks of a mother; this belly…" he continued, putting his hand on her belly "is the belly of someone who carried a baby for all those long months, even without realizing it; these shadows…" he said, letting a finger fall under her eyes "are the reason why our daughter is in such a good health two months after her birth. All of this Emily, is thanks to you, only you. Of course it changed you, but it made you become a mother, and a great one. It made me become a father. All of the flaws you see in this, I see courage, strength and beauty." Aaron finished, kissing Emily softly on the neck.

"Why are you always so kind to me?" Emily asked, trying to wipe the tears off her cheeks.

"It's not about kindness. I do really mean it honey. And I'll be willing to prove it to you whenever you are."

Emily turned to face Aaron and started kissing him, slowly, softly. She didn't know what she had done to have such an amazing man sticking around, but she wasn't willing to let him go soon. Aaron had his hands around her waist, holding her as tight as he could. He pushed her back against the wall, roaming his hands on her body. He put his hands under Emily's bottom and she took the opportunity to hang to him, putting her legs around his waist. She deepened the kiss, wanting more.

"Do you want me to prove it to you now?" Aaron asked, separating their lips for a brief moment.

"Yes, please." Emily answered.

Aaron pulled her off the wall to take her to their bedroom. He laid her on the bed, right in the middle, and took off his dark jeans and his polo shirt. Now in his underwear, he climbed on the bed and stood above Emily, looking at her in the eyes. He kissed her lips softly, then went down her neck, her shoulder, and the valley of her breasts. Suddenly, he thought of something, and raised to go to their closet. He took one of his ties from it, and came back.

"What are you doing with this?" Emily asked, curious.

"I want you to feel how beautiful you are… Let me put that on your eyes, just feel everything…"

Emily wasn't so sure about it, they had done it a couple of times, but this time was different, they had not been intimate in a while, and she was not really comfortable. Aaron saw her look of hesitation.

"Trust me, feel me. This is all about you…" he said.

Emily nodded, agreeing to Aaron's idea. She rose a bit, letting Aaron put the tie on her eyes and make a knot with it. She felt uncomfortable, but she trusted Aaron. Soon, his mouth was back on her, kissing her entire body from top to bottom. His hands were caressing her breasts, her hips, her legs. It felt good. It was the first time they were intimate since Inez was born, and it almost felt like a first time. She was feeling shy, not sure about what to do, what to say, how to react. She decided to let go, and stayed still on the bed, muffled noises escaping her lips every single time he was touching one of her sweet spots.

"Aaron… What if Inez is waking up…"

"Shhhh, we'll deal with that if it happens."

Aaron continued his ministration, not caring one moment about what Emily had just said, but praying hard it wouldn't happen. He kissed her breasts, played with them gently, knowing how sore she still was. His hand was going down between Emily's legs, but still not entering her. The flat of his hand on her sex, caressing gently. One of his fingers started touching slightly her clit, and she let a moan escape when she felt it. It was feeling so good, she had forgotten how good it could feel. Aaron slid one finger at her entrance, but he could feel she was still not quite wet.

"Aaron… I think I'm having dryness…" Emily said.

She sighed loudly and suddenly took the tie off her eyes, annoyed.

"And I just killed the mood… Damn it…"

Aaron chuckled and forced her to put the tie back on her eyes.

"I don't want to hear you say that… We can just use the lube we bought before our wedding" he said.

Emily felt him move a bit and reach in the drawer of the nightstand. Truth be told, she had forgotten this thing. They had bought it along a couple of other things in a bold move, trying to spice up a bit their nights, but had in the end not used it that often. She felt him move back on her, and heard the tube being opened, and suddenly, she felt his now cold fingers on her. He entered her slowly with two fingers, and she moaned louder that she thought she would. It felt good. He slowly pumped his two fingers in and out of her a few times, and she felt him move on the bed. She couldn't understand what he was really doing until she felt his mouth in between her thighs, right where her clit was throbbing of need. He parted her folds and started licking her from bottom to top, and Emily finally relaxed completely. She was taking deep long breaths, focusing on Aaron's hands and mouth, forgetting about the world surrounding them.

Aaron was happy to feel her relax, happy to be able to prove her how wrong she was when she was worrying so much. Though, it had been three months since he had not touch his wife, and his hard length was reminding him of how much he had missed it, he had missed her. It was true she wasn't looking the same than she was before her pregnancy, but for nothing in the world he would change that. She was stunning, beautiful as always, she was just his Emily, his wife, the mother of his daughter. Aaron continued a little bit more, letting her appreciate it, letting her realize how loved she was. And then he stopped, taking off his underwear, ready to make one with her. He felt a bit selfish, he had told her it would be only about her, her pleasure, but he couldn't take it anymore. He opened the tube of lube once more and put some on his length, concerned for Emily's wellness. He parted a bit more her legs, letting her know it was time, and lied on top of her, entering her. He had forgotten how good it could feel, and a moan escaped his lips.

Emily felt her breath being taken away, in a good way, when he entered her. She knew it was coming, she had felt him move from the bed, she had heard the tube being opened, he had parted her legs more, but still, not seeing him, she had felt taken by surprise. She had forgotten how perfect he was to her, and she tried to reach his neck to put her hands around him. Clumsily, she managed to bring him closer to her, and she felt his lips falling down on her neck, while he started moving slowly but surely into her. It felt good, so good. She started moaning louder as Aaron continued moving in and out of her, she still wondered how it was possible for him to be so talented in bed. He was going so slow it started driving her crazy. His mouth was still on her neck, on her shoulder, biting it softly, sucking to make her a love bite. She felt loved, and she felt amazing. She felt reassured that after everything they had been through, Aaron was still in love with her, Aaron still wanted her.

Aaron started moving a little bit faster, he really wanted her to climax, and he knew he wouldn't be able to last much longer. No matter how much he needed his release, it was still all about her. Her moans were guiding him, he was listening, feeling. He had understood her a while ago now, it was almost easy to make her come, he knew how to do it almost every time. He had learned, studied, and after more than three years of passion, they just knew each other. He could feel her inner muscles starting to tighten. He put his hands on her hips and turned them over so she could be on top of him.

Still blind, it caught Emily off guard and she moaned of surprise. It took her a few seconds to realize what she was supposed to do, and she put her hands on Aaron's lower stomach, trying to stabilize herself before starting to move. It felt weird, not being able to see, but being put in charge of their pleasure. She wasn't really confident in her movements, herself, how to move. Being blind was increasing a lot the feelings, but it was also making her less confident. It was like she was a newbie at this again.

Aaron guided her, putting his hands on her hips. He helped her getting into the rhythm, moving in sync, and then wetted his fingers in his mouth to slide them down in between them, between her folds. He started playing with her clit, putting more or less pressure on it, circling it. Emily started moaning louder, and Aaron could feel himself getting closer to his release. He continued playing with Emily's clit, and he could feel her walls clench around him. Emily moaned out loud, riding her orgasm until she couldn't take it anymore. The sensation made him closer to his release, and it took only a few more thrusts for him to reach his climax. He put his hands back on Emily's hips, holding her still after they had both come down from their high. They were both breathing heavily, trying to catch their breath. Emily fell on him, and then rolled down next to him to lie on the bed. She took off the tie that was still on her eyes, slowly got accustomed to the light in the room again and put her head on his chest.

"Thank you…" she said.

He kissed her forehead, and as if on cue, they started hearing Inez crying softy in her crib in the other room.


	23. The Adaptation

THE ADAPTATION

Emily thanked God everyday for being a White House official and having a twelve-week maternity leave. An executive order in one of the previous administrations had made it possible, and Kirkman had of course kept it. Sure, she was still going to the White House even on maternity leave. Sure she was still working. She was too much of a workaholic to stay away from the White House for three months. So sometimes she was taking a walk with Inez all the way to 1600 Penn, saying hi to Daddy, and going to her office, checking everything was in order, that her deputies were not messing up with things. She really missed the atmosphere at the White House, but in the meantime, she wasn't sure she was ready to leave her baby girl to daycare. Plus, Inez was changing a lot, day by day, and she was afraid she was going to miss all these moments, all these new smiles, these discoveries. Inez was a true gem, no matter how much she could cry some days, no matter how cranky she could be on others, Emily wouldn't trade it for the world.

Though, Inez was 3 months old now, and it was time for Emily to go back full time. She had managed with Tom Kirkman to take a couple more weeks off, unpaid, so that she would be back on the day of the inauguration. It was on that day that Aaron and Emily being co-Chiefs of Staff would be official, so they thought it was better to start off on the right foot. They had found a good daycare not very far from the White House, with pretty large opening times, and bilingual. Aaron had insisted on this, he had started speaking Spanish to his daughter the very first day, and he could feel she was understanding him. He had no intention on making her a Spanish freak, but he wanted his daughter to speak the language of his family. Most of his family was almost fluent in English, but still, it wasn't like it was their first language. Inez Shore was part of a very big and loud Mexican-American family, and Aaron intended to teach her these values, no matter how far from his birth place they were. Emily was absolutely okay with that, she loved seeing Aaron talking Spanish to their daughter, she found it very cute, and was happy to be able to hear him speaking Spanish more often. Even after three years, communicating with her in-laws was still stressing her all the time.

"So… This is it? We go back to work together today?" Emily asked while getting ready.

"I guess so. Are you excited?" Aaron continued, kissing her temple.

"Worried. I don't know if I'm ready to leave Inez at daycare for a full day…"

"I'm not ready either. But it will be good to have you back… And Inez will be okay, she seemed fine when we took her last week to adapt to this new environment."

"Yes I know… But still, I might pick her up early tonight…"

"We'll see how it goes."

They had dropped Inez to daycare on the way to the White House, and though adjusting to being back at work was making it a rough day for Emily, her mind was constantly on Inez, how she was doing, if people were taking good care of her. She had forced herself not to call daycare from the whole morning, but had stopped resisting after lunch. Aaron had caught her doing it, and had chuckled at her. Of course he was worried too, that was the basic definition of being a father, but he had been back to work for a while now, so he had not felt the same way about leaving Inez at daycare.

Most of the day had been dedicated to moving things around. At first, Aaron had decided to move in Emily's office, since it was the dedicated office for the White House Chief of Staff. But after thinking about it more, they had realized it wasn't manageable to be in the same office all day long. First, they had many different ways of dealing with things, and they didn't know if they could stand working in the same room every single day. They had done it a few times, it had gone well, but they honestly did not trust each other much when it was coming to work. They knew they would have arguments, they knew they often did not see things the same way and had different ways to deal with everything. So they knew that eventually, they would fight. They didn't really care about it, they were prepared for it happening, it had basically been what had driven them toward each other. But they just needed their space.

So people had moved, and Aaron had managed to get the office right next to Emily's. Basically, Emily's deputies had taken an office right across the hall, while Aaron had taken the office of Emily's —now his too— deputies. There even was a door in between their offices, so that they could communicate directly easily. It was the middle of the afternoon, and Aaron and Emily were finishing moving things. They were now both sitting on the couch in Emily's office, trying to catch up their breath after moving hundreds of boxes from one office to another.

"So… What should we do now? How do you want to organize this?" Aaron asked.

"Should we separate tasks? Like, I deal with the schedule, you deal with the bills? Or something like that?" Emily offered.

"Well, the problem is that we will constantly step on each-others' toes… Cause I can't deal with the bills if I don't have access to the schedule… And you can't deal with the schedule if you don't know what bill we are pushing for…"

"You're right… But we need to figure out a way, otherwise it doesn't make sense to have two chiefs of staff. We are both here to have less work, not to double it."

"What about meetings? Do we both go to every meeting? How do we deal with keeping each other posted about everything…" Aaron asked.

"Well, I don't think it is necessary for us to go to every meeting together. We can go together for important ones. Or if the President is called in command ops."

"I guess so. I think we'll have to adjust over the next couple of weeks…"

"Are you worried?" Emily wondered

"Kinda… I just don't want our job to encroach on our relation. I mean, I trust us, I know we can do this, but I know it's gonna be challenging too…"

"Yeah, I guess it will be challenging…"

A couple of weeks later, Tom Kirkman had decided to push for a new bill on gun control. It was a tough one, a tricky one. Citizens were too attached to their 2nd amendment rights to even hear about gun control, but another shooting had happened in a school, and kids from Penny's age had been killed. It had done the trick for Kirkman to decide to launch this bill again. Sure, it had not been talked about much in his campaign, they had decided to avoid the subject like the plague, but since that day, it was all the President was caring about. Aaron was more reasoned than Emily on subjects like these, so they had decided he would be the one pushing the Senators to pass the bill. In the meantime, Emily was planning the President's schedule, which had suddenly become fuller after the announcement of the bill.

Suddenly in the middle of the afternoon, the co-Chiefs of Staff were called in command ops. There had been an attack in on a U.S. base in Afghanistan. Aaron was calling a few Senators to meet up with them when he had been called. He walked out of his office and met Emily, who had obviously been called too, in the hallway.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"The same than you…" he answered, walking to the elevator.

"No… Keep doing what you were doing. We don't need to be two Chiefs of Staff down there."

"But I was NSA before, I've been to Afghanistan. I know more than you do about what's happening there."

"But you have meetings planned."

"And they will understand why I had to cancel…"

They were both in front of the elevator, waiting for it to come, and starting to argue. Their voices were starting to raise.

"Aaron. You can't leave things undone like that."

"Then take them for me. You can go to the meetings instead of me…"

"I can't go to the meetings, you are the one who scheduled the meetings. They are expecting you… Not me!"

"Emily. This is a national security matter. Come if you want, but I am going."

"Aaron, you're not NSA anymore, you have someone to do that job!" Emily continued to argue.

The door of the elevator opened, and Emily got in first, blocking Aaron from entering it.

"What the heck Emily?"

"Go back to your meetings…"

"I might not be NSA anymore, but you can't give me orders anymore either…"

He pushed Emily on the side and got into the elevator. Emily was furious. He was acting as if he was the only Chief of Staff. Of course, if she had still been the only Chief of Staff, she would have dropped the meeting to go down to the PEOC, but they were a team now, and he had clearly forgotten it.

"You and I. After this crisis is over. We talk. And we set rules, once and for all." she said, and then ignored him.

The tension between them was clear, it couldn't go unnoticed to anyone that they had fought. This time though, they had managed to stay professional, not arguing in front of anyone in the PEOC, probably too professional actually. They couldn't talk to each other, couldn't even look at each other. Emily was wondering if all of this was a good idea after all. Of course, it had seemed great to be able to continue her job and have less demanding hours, but on days like this, she actually wondered if all of this was worth it. She sometimes doubted her abilities to be the equal of Aaron, and she wondered if their relation was working only when one of them was in charge. Changes didn't suit both of them, they were not managing them well. She knew it was still very new for both of them to be in the same position, and that it was complicating things. They had talked about it. But she had not realized how hard it would be.

A couple of hours later, they were both back to their office, but still not talking. It was 5 p.m. and Emily decided to call it a day. She needed to pick Inez up from daycare, and she was just exhausted with all of this. It was still early for her to leave, but she just needed it. She cleaned her desk, brought the President his schedule for the next day, and knocked at Aaron's door, that had been close since their fight. She sighed and opened the door, not knowing how to react.

"I am calling it a day. I brought the President his schedule for tomorrow. I'm going to pick up Inez…" she said in one quick breath.

"Can we talk?" Aaron asked.

"I don't have much time… Daycare is closing in half an hour…"

"Em… It's closing in exactly 58 minutes…" Aaron said, looking at his watch. "Please don't run away…"

"I'm not… I'm just very tired. Can we talk about it later? Please…" she begged.

She just really didn't want to do this now. Even though they had agreed to never bring back work at home, especially now that they were a team 24/7. But she just couldn't handle it right now. She would just burst into tears, and she didn't have the time for that.

"What about the no work at home rule?" Aaron asked.

"Just please… Not now…" she begged again.

"Okay…" he gave up. "I won't be late, I'll bring back take-out from the corner of the street."

"Thanks…"

And with that Emily left, not even kissing Aaron like she so often did. Truth be told, Aaron was upset too. Deep in his heart, he understood why Emily had said what she had said, but he also was sure he was right, that he should have been there for the meeting, and he was conflicted with everything going on right now. Plus, he really didn't want their work to encroach on their life, and he was worried that it was what was actually happening right now. He had decided to let go, he had seen the look in his wife's eyes, he had understood she really didn't want to talk right now, but he was now worried about coming back home and about the evening they would spend together. The last thing he wanted was to let the tension of work coming inside their home, and this was happening only two weeks after Emily's return to work. He shook his head to stop thinking about it, and finished his work for the day.


	24. The Fight

THE FIGHT

When Aaron came home that night, Emily was already wearing her pajamas, ready to go to bed. Inez was still with her, babbling on the couch. Emily had put pillows around her so she wouldn't fall off the couch, and was playing with her. But as soon as Aaron arrived, Emily started to withdraw into herself. Aaron noticed it as soon as he entered, as she stopped smiling and playing with Inez, and she turned the TV on.

"Hey, I brought things from the Chinese place you like." Aaron started, putting the take-out on the counter of the kitchen.

"Thanks" Emily answered sharply.

Aaron could feel her being tense and did not even bother continuing the discussion, he knew it wouldn't lead anywhere. He took his coat and shoes off and walked toward the couch to kiss his daughter. He sat on the couch next to Emily and he felt her stiffen from his closeness. He tried to ignore it, but it was hard for him. Thankfully, the sound coming from the TV was making the tension less obvious, but still, Emily was not saying a word. Aaron took Inez in his arms and launched her in the air just like he was used to doing. Inez was laughing, but Emily looked at him harshly.

"Be careful, she just ate… I don't want to clean vomit tonight… And I already gave her a bath" Emily said not too nicely.

Once again, Aaron didn't bother answering and put Inez down on his lap. Tension was at its height.

"I think you should put her to bed soon. She looks tired." Emily explained, and rose to go to the kitchen.

"Yeah, I know. I'll do that in five, just enjoying a minute with her."

Aaron could hear Emily rummaging through the kitchen and keeping herself busy.

"I think your mommy is mad with me…" Aaron whispered to Inez in Spanish. "I know, I screwed up. Don't learn that word. Don't tell mommy I taught you that word."

Inez looked at him intensely with her little eyes and started laughing.

"Are you seriously making fun of daddy?" Aaron said, shooting a dirty look at his daughter.

She laughed again.

"Well, since you're making fun of me, I'll just put you to bed I guess."

Aaron rose with Inez in his arms and walked to her bedroom. They had taken the habit of playing a little lullaby before getting her to sleep, so he plugged the nightlight that started making music. He changed her and kissed her forehead, tucked her in her little crib, gave her the pacifier she had during the night and put her cuddly toy next to her. She tried to reach it and started playing with it, and Aaron turned the light off.

When he came back to the living room, Emily had reheated everything and had already started eating on the couch. He sat next to her and took a box of take-out from the coffee table, and they ate in silence. Emily had never been so captivated by something on TV.

"Are you going to say something?" Aaron started.

"I don't have much to say…" Emily answered.

"So we're just gonna go to bed like that, on a fight, not even trying to talk things out."

"I"m just too mad at you right now…"

"Em… We did not accept Kirkman's offer for it to encroach on our life."

"I know…"

"You do realize that it's exactly what is happening right now?"

"I'm not hungry anymore. I'm going to bed I'm tired." Emily said, rising, and escaped the room.

Aaron looked at her leaving, taken aback by her behavior. He really did not want to put up a fight with her tonight. He finished eating his box in front of the TV, not even knowing what he was watching, but not caring either. He threw everything in the trash can and walked to the bedroom where Emily was already pretending to sleep.

"Can I sleep in our bed or should I take the couch?" he said angrily.

"Do whatever you want, you know better than me anyway…" Emily said, ignoring him.

It was it. Aaron really didn't want to put up a fight with his wife, but it was just too much. That last comment was the peak of all of this, and he felt himself exploding with anger. He turned the lights on in the room, pissed, and walked in front of Emily's side of the bed.

"Ok, cut the crap with me now. I'm done with this bullshit!" Aaron exclaimed.

Emily sat up in the bed and looked at him, angrily.

"Cut the crap? Are you serious right now? Have you seen the scene you made this afternoon at work? Damnit Aaron! You don't even realize why I'm pissed at you right now!" Emily started raising her voice.

"I am the one who made the scene? Emily! You're the one who wanted to send me away while we were both called in the PEOC! You're not my boss anymore! You cannot boss me around like that anymore!" Aaron continued to raise his voice.

"You were acting like you were the only Chief of Staff!"

"And what were you doing? Exactly the same!"

"I was just trying to reason you! Your behavior was stupid!"

"Ok you know what Emily, I'm giving Kirkman my letter of resignation tomorrow. I refuse to fight with you for work. I said it wouldn't happen, and it won't. I'm not threatening our relation just because of a damn stupid job." Aaron yelled.

He didn't let her the time to answer, took a blanket and his pillow and was about to leave the room when they heard Inez starting to cry in her bedroom. They both sighed, exasperated. Emily stood up and started going to Inez's bedroom.

"Congrats on waking her up with your yelling!" she exclaimed, pushing him on the side when she crossed the threshold of their bedroom.

"Emily! What the hell!" Aaron exclaimed, shocked by Emily's attitude.

"What? Do you want to argue on who is supposed to console Inez too?" Emily started screaming.

Aaron was left dumbfounded by Emily's comment and gave up. Emily walked toward to Inez's room where she was stil crying. Aaron stood there, on the threshold between their bedroom and the living room, not knowing what to do or what to say. He walked back to the living room, peeved, and put his pillow and blanket on the couch. He then walked to Inez's bedroom where Emily was trying to calm Inez down. He stayed at the entrance, and Emily shot him a death glare when she saw him. He raised his hands in a movement of withdrawal, not wanting to add anything to the quarrel. He didn't really know what to do, as Emily was rocking Inez back and forth, trying to soothe her. They both stayed there for what seemed like hours. As soon as Inez seemed calmer and Emily was trying to put her back to bed, she was starting to cry again. At one point, Aaron offered Emily to take a turn and try to soothe Inez, but he was answered by another death glare and decided to leave the room, letting Emily deal with Inez. He sat on the couch, waiting desperately for Inez to stop crying and for Emily to leave the room. In between two cries of Inez, he was thinking of his fight with Emily, and wondering how he would solve that. He couldn't believe he would already give his resignation, only a couple of weeks after starting his new job. He was beyond pissed with how things had gone, and he was pissed not being able to talk things out with his wife. He had never imagined it could reach such a peak, and he was wondering why they just couldn't be equals.

It was almost one in the morning, and Inez was still crying. He was listening carefully, hoping a couple of times that she was finally calming, but as soon as Emily was trying to put her back to bed, he could hear her starting to scream again. He decided to come back to Inez's room, hoping Emily would not push him away again. He showed himself at the entrance of the room, and saw Emily with her eyes red, exhausted and exasperated. With Inez's cries, he had not heard her crying.

"Em…" he started.

"Don't… Just don't." Emily cut him short.

"Please, let me take care of her. Just go to bed." he offered.

"Why? I'm not a good mother either? That's what you think right?" Emily spat.

Aaron was just so sad at Emily's comment. He had wanted to raise his voice again, but he was just too tired. He shook his head no. He walked toward Emily and took her in his arms, Inez in between them. Emily shrugged a bit first, but then let go.

"Why is everything so crappy sometimes?" she asked.

He took Inez in his arms and kissed Emily's forehead.

"It just happens. I'll take care of her, go get some rest…" he said.

Emily did as told and left the room. Aaron sat in the rocking chair and started swinging, Inez on his shoulder. After a little bit, Inez started calming down, but she was still not sleeping. He was starting to wonder whether he should let her sleep with them or not, but he had decided to sleep on the couch, not really welcome by Emily in the marital bed. He stood up with Inez still in his arms, still sniffing, and started pacing around the bedroom. He stood at the door of Inez's bedroom and saw Emily, sitting on the couch, waiting for him.

"What are you doing here?" he said, walking toward her and sitting on the couch too.

"Thinking…" she answered. "She looks calmer…"

"She's just faking it… She'll start crying again as soon as I put her back to bed I think…" Aaron answered. "What were you thinking about?"

"Don't give your resignation letter tomorrow? Please…" Emily pleaded.

"Em… I don't want my job to come between us…" Aaron explained.

"It won't… And you love your job…"

"It already has. And I love you more than my job…"

"Please, don't make a rash decision… I would hate myself for that…"

Aaron didn't answer, thinking about it.

"I don't know Em… I don't know. I don't want to lose you."

Emily slid next to Aaron on the couch and put her head on his shoulder. Inez was still in Aaron's arms and had finally started sleeping.

"I'm sorry…" she said in a whisper.

"I'm sorry too…" he answered.

"Come to bed with me… I can't sleep without you…" she asked.

"I'm not sure Inez is enough settled yet… But I'll come." he explained.

"Bring her with us. I just want you and our bed right now…"

She rose, took Aaron's pillow and blanket away from the couch, and walked back to the bedroom, inviting Aaron to follow her. He did so, and they laid on the bed, Inez in between them, holding their hands and looking at each other in the eyes. They fell asleep together, nothing really solved, but tensions finally appeased.


	25. The Unexpectedness

THE UNEXPECTEDNESS

A few weeks after their fight, everything was back to normal between Aaron and Emily. She had talked some sense into Aaron's mind, and he had given up the idea of resigning. It had taken them a good two or three days for everything to really come back to normal, and they had decided to change their organization at work. They had figured out a better way to make everything work, and since then everything seemed for the best. Emily had truly freaked out over the idea of Aaron resigning. She knew it was hard to adjust to being equals again, but she truly did not want him gone from the White House. They had promised each other it would never happen again, and for now, it had not.

Emily had taken the morning off to take Inez to the pediatrician. It was a regular monthly visit, but Emily was always stressed with them. Aaron had wanted to come too, but they had not been able to both take the morning off, things had been a bit crazy at the White House recently. So here she was in the waiting room of the pediatrician. She was looking at Inez, who was happily smiling at her, playing with the keys of the car. Inez was truly a gem. She was rarely crying without a good reason. That night when she had cried so much a couple of weeks ago was an exception. Since she had started daycare, she was sleeping all night long. Now a little more than 4 months old, she had grown a lot, much more than Emily had imagined it was possible. She was starting to eat jars of baby food, which had felt like a huge step for both Emily and Aaron. Emily was thinking about everything that had happened in the last 4 months, about her family, her work, when suddenly, a thought popped in her mind. She had given birth to Inez 4 months ago, but she had never had her period again since then. She realized that she had never really thought about it, or thought about asking a doctor about it. She was cut short in her thoughts when the pediatrician welcomed them in his office. After a quick examination, he asserted that everything was fine for Inez, which was always a huge relief for her mom. She was growing perfectly, she was in the average for babies her age, and it was actually great since she was a little premature.

"Doctor, I have a question… I'm sorry to ask you that, I know it's not really your topic, but I was wondering when I was supposed to have my period back after the pregnancy?"

"You are not breastfeeding, are you?"

"No I'm not… Is that a problem?"

"No, absolutely not, but usually mothers who are not breastfeeding tend to have their period earlier…"

"So you think there is a problem with me?" Emily asked, starting to worry.

"No, absolutely not, every woman is different, but you should go talk to your gynecologist. He will be the most qualified to answer your questions…"

"But nothing serious?"

"No, I'm sure it's nothing serious… Don't worry." the pediatrician smiled softly.

Emily left the doctor's office with Inez, wondering what could possibly happen. She was imagining the worse: cancer, incurable disease, infertility. Her mind was racing while waiting for the elevator, and as she was looking at Inez, smiling in her arms, she could feel herself about to burst into tears. She was starting to freak out, and she decided to go up to the gynecological floor of the hospital. Inez still in her arms, she walked to the front desk to ask if her gynecologist was available. She was trying not to freak out when she explained the nurse at the desk her gynecologist was available, reassuring herself in the meantime by saying nothing was urgent, but she was just not feeling well. She got annoyed pretty quickly when the nurse told her that no appointment was possible before the next fews days, but Dr. Alberts came around and spotted Emily. He quickly came to say hi and realized that something was not right.

"Mrs. Shore, how are you doing?" Dr. Alberts asked, shaking her hand.

"Dr. Alberts, I'm fine thank you. I was just worried about a few things and wanted to make an appointment with you, but you're not available before the beginning of next week apparently." Emily answered.

"Oh… I'm sure I have 5 minutes for you, how about now? I'll be a bit late, but I'm sure that won't be long…" he answered, inviting Emily in his office.

Emily sat with Inez at his desk.

"So, what can I do for you? You look stressed" he asked.

"I was wondering when I was supposed to have my period after my pregnancy… Inez is 4 months old now, and I still haven't had my period, and I just realized that and it is worrying me…" Emily was reeling off.

"Okay, slow down. Keep you calm." Dr. Alberts said, trying to temper Emily. "Are you breastfeeding?"

"No I'm not… I was with Inez's pediatrician earlier, and he asked me the same question and told me to come and see you…" Emily could feel her stress in her voice.

"Ha yeah, I'm not surprised he asked you to come. We'll just run some tests quickly, but I'm sure it's nothing important, you shouldn't worry about it. It happens all the time, every woman is different. I've seen some having their period a month after the birth, others six months after."

"Are you sure? I mean… I've had so many weird things in the past. I just… It's not cancer?" Emily asked, biting her nails.

"Cancer ? Why would it be cancer ?" Dr. Alberts chuckled. "Mrs. Rhodes, you are a very healthy young woman, there is no reason why you would have cancer. It most probably has something to do with your hormones, nothing to worry about. I'm going to order a blood test for you, and we'll see how everything is going on. Alright?"

Emily felt only half-relieved, but still, it had felt good to talk to her doctor. It was only 11 a.m. when she exited Dr. Alberts' office, and she decided to take the blood test before dropping Inez to daycare. She wanted to know more as soon as possible, and she knew that she wouldn't be able to think straight before having answers. Deep inside, she was imagining all sorts of scenarios, how to tell Aaron that she had cancer, or that they wouldn't have kids again. She knew it was too early to even think about having another kid, but she knew they wanted to have more kids in the future, and it was scaring her not to be able have kids again. She was just too young for that. She shook her head to get her ideas straight and got a large cup of coffee after dropping Inez at daycare and on her way to the White House. It was burning down her throat but it felt good to have something else to think about. She was back for lunchtime at the White House and she met with Aaron to eat.

"Hey, how was the appointment? Is everything fine with Inez?" he asked, entering her office and kissing her softly.

"Hey, yeah everything's fine. She's growing up normally, everything is normal. Everything is looking good." she answered.

"Great. I was starting to worry, I thought your appointment was at ten…"

"Yeah. It was. But I went upstairs to see my gynecologist afterwards…"

Aaron raised an eyebrow, intrigued, and Emily continued.

"I was waiting for the pediatrician, and I was thinking about everything, and I realized that I never had my period since Inez… So I started freaking out…"

"Oh… Is that normal?" Aaron asked, half worried, half uncomfortable about the conversation.

"Well, she said that it could be. So she made me do a blood test, and so I did it just after cause I know that I won't be able to think straight before I have results, but apparently it's just a thing with hormones…"

"Well, tell me when you have the results. Now you're worrying me too…"

"Aaron… Please don't worry. One of us needs to think straight and stay sane as long as we don't have the results."

It made Aaron chuckle and he took his wife in his arms for a short moment before eating lunch. The rest of the day went by pretty fast, and Aaron felt relieved to have Emily back at the office to help him out with everything. The days had been pretty hectic since he was back to being Chief of Staff, and even though the rhythm as National Security Adviser had been intense, it just wasn't the same. He actually wondered how he had done all of that on his own when he was Chief of Staff in his time, and how Emily had done all that on her own for the past few years. There might have only been one Chief of Staff in all the previous administrations, but this was for sure a two-person job.

Exhausted, he asked Emily to be the one leaving early to pick up Inez from daycare at six, and he came home to take care of his baby girl. He changed into more comfortable clothes and gave her a bath and fed her. He then played with her until it was time for her to go to bed. He loved spending time alone with her, and since she was growing up so fast, she was now reacting to all of the things he was doing, she was smiling and babbling. She was starting rolling too, and it was more and more work to be sure she was safe. It was amazing him to see her grow up, from this tiny thing that came out of Emily's womb to this little smily girl reacting to her dad's silly behavior. She was making Aaron's life more full, plain and simple.

Emily came home later than expected and ended up not being able to see her daughter before it was time for her to go to bed. It was the little things like that that Emily missed with her crazy job, but she was thankful for Tom Kirkman's idea to make her and Aaron co-Chiefs of Staff. She was realizing day by day she would have seen her daughter even less than that if they still had both their crazy jobs, and her daughter would basically have been raised by a nanny. She would have hated herself for that. Though, she hoped that one day when they would have another kid, they would have less crazy jobs and would be able to be a normal family. Sure, she loved her job and she wouldn't trade it for the world, but since she had become a mother, she was craving for a basic office job with basic regular hours.

The morning after, both Emily and Aaron were at work when Emily got a call from her gynecologist who had received the results of her blood test. She sat on her chair, listening to the results, speechless. If there was one thing she had not thought about, it was that. Aaron, who had heard her on the phone, came to her office to ask, and saw her pale as if she had seen a ghost.

"Em…" he started, walking toward her.

"I'm pregnant…" she said in a breath.

"What?" he asked, surprised.

"I'm pregnant. Again…"

Aaron sat in the chair opposite her and didn't say anything. He became as pale as Emily. Inez was a bit more than 4 months old and they were already expecting their second child. This was not how things were supposed to go. They had not planned this at all. It was just too soon.

"How…" Aaron wanted to start…

"Do you really need me to draw you a picture?" Emily asked, raising her eyebrow.

"No, of course not. But… So soon? Is that even possible?"

"Apparently… Dr. Alberts says that I got pregnant my very first ovulation. That's why I never had my period back… I never even had the time to realize everything was back to normal"

"Woah…" Aaron couldn't find his words. "That's…"

"Insane?" Emily cut him short. "Yeah I know…"

None of them talked for a moment, the silence in the room was heavy, as if a storm had just come through the office. It lasted for what seemed like an eternity, and only Aaron's phone ringing in the office next to them made them come back to reality.

"I have to take that, I'm coming back…" Aaron said and rose quickly to answer the call.

Emily didn't even bother to answer and went back to her thoughts. How were they going to deal with everything? Having one child was something, already quite complicated with their jobs, but two? That close in age? Emily didn't even know precisely how far along she was. Since she had not gotten her periods back, she couldn't precisely know it before the ultrasound. Her mind started racing about her quitting her job, being a stay-at-home mom and how she would hate having to do that but how she wouldn't have the choice because daycare would cost too much for two children. And then she started thinking about diapers, bottles and everything that they would have to buy in double. She started freaking out and ran out of her office to go to the bathroom where she splashed some water on her face. She met Kendra there, and she quickly noticed something wasn't okay with Emily.

"Hey, are you okay?" Kendra asked.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm fine, just a little weakness…" Emily lied.

"You sure? You don't look fine, you're really pale…"

"Yeah, I'll be fine. Nothing to worry about. I'll… tell you everything, but I just can't right now…" Emily admitted.

"Ok sure. You know where to find me, come whenever you need or want." Kendra answered, stroking Emily's back gently and leaving the bathroom.

Emily looked at herself in the mirror. It's true, she was pale. She was as white as a sheet, she looked tired and it was only the morning. She was suddenly feeling nauseous and ran in one of the stalls to throw up her breakfast.

In the meantime, Aaron was finishing his call and saw Kendra knocking at his door.

"Hey, is everything alright? I saw Emily in the bathroom and she didn't seem fine…" she asked.

"Yeah. It's… complicated." he started, unsure of how to answer. "We'll explain. She's in the bathroom you said?"

"Yeah. Well, I guess she is still there. I'm here if you need anything…"

"Thanks Kendra, I'll go see her."

Aaron walked to the women's bathroom and knocked discreetly. He opened the door and heard Emily in one of the stalls.

"Em, it's me…"

She pulled the door open, squatting down in case she were to throw up again. Aaron walked toward her and lowered himself to her level. He took her hair gently in his hands and made a quick ponytail with the hair tie she always had around her wrist, a habit she had taken after her very first pregnancy. He rubbed her back until she was feeling better, and helped her standing up. He took her in his arms while she started sobbing.

"Hey, we'll figure things out. We always do."


	26. The Illness

THE ILLNESS

It was a Friday evening. Emily was chilling on the couch watching TV, and Inez was already sleeping. They had discovered Emily's new pregnancy three weeks ago, and since then, Aaron was insisting on Emily taking it slow. They had talked about it, had tried to figure things out. Aaron had reassured Emily about keeping her job and everything else, from daycare to moving into a bigger apartment. Aaron was doing more and more things at home and at work, and Emily was worried he would tire himself out just for her, but he had reassured her everything was fine. It was just the way Aaron was, always caring more about the persons he loved than himself. Thankfully though, everything had been pretty slow at work, and Emily was hoping to would continue like this as long as possible.

It was late and Aaron had just gotten off the phone with his mom. He was walking back to the living room when he started talking, his voice hoarse.

"Em, you remember when we said we were going to renew our vows?"

"Of course…" Emily answered, intrigued and worried.

Aaron sat on the couch next to her, crossed-legged, looking at her. Emily quickly noticed his eyes were red, but she was surprised, she had not seen him cry very often, and especially not after a call with his mom.

"What is going on Aaron?" she asked, taking his hands in hers.

"Can we do that soon?" he asked, not answering her previous question.

"Aaron… You cried. I can see it… What is going on?"

"My mom…" he started. "She has been diagnosed with a terminal stage cancer. Breast cancer. She already has metastasis everywhere. She won't make it."

Emily's jaw dropped and she put her hand in front of her mouth, shocked. Tears starting coming to her eyes and she closed the distance between them to take Aaron in her arms. She had not seen him like this, ever, not even when they had lost the baby, not even when Inez had had arrhythmia and they had almost lost her. He had always tried to be strong for her, for them, all the time, and suddenly, he was bursting into tears, in her arms, not able to hold anything back anymore. He put his head on Emily's lap and let the flow of tears run down his cheeks. It was as if his whole life had been broken into thousands of pieces, as if everything was collapsing. Emily was trying to soothe him, running her hand in his hair, trying to comfort him, but truth be told, she was abashed, inconsolable too. They stayed there, not moving, not saying anything for a good moment, and only Inez starting to cry made them come out of their apathy. Aaron sat up to let Emily go and put Inez back to bed. He curled up into a ball on the couch, putting his head in his hands, and wiping the tears off his cheeks.

A moment later, Emily came back with Inez in her arms.

"I can't make her to go back to sleep… I think she's feeling something…" she said.

Aaron raised his head, looking at Emily coming back toward him, and extended his arms to take Inez. Emily gave him their daughter, and as soon as Inez was in her dad's arms, she eased up. This made Aaron chuckle slightly, and he realized that she could feel everything that was going on, even though she was still so little. He kissed his daughter's head, smelling this baby's smell that comforted him so much. Having her in his arms was soothing him too and Inez fell back asleep almost instantly. A few minutes later, Aaron stood up to bring her back to bed, and then walked to the kitchen where Emily was drinking tea. Emily started talking.

"Aaron… We can renew our vows whenever you want, wherever you want."

"Thank you…" he said, kissing her forehead. "I think I'll head to bed. I'm just… exhausted."

"Sure, I'll join you in a sec."

Aaron left Emily alone in the kitchen and walked to the bathroom to get changed. He looked at himself in the mirror, his eyes red from crying, disheveled and he was suddenly taken by spasms. Trying to calm himself, he sat on the floor, breathing heavily to get back to a normal respiration. He closed his eyes to concentrate on his respiration, but all he could see was childhood memories coming back to his mind, all the memories he had with his mom, all the fights he had had with her, all the laughs, all the holidays. Everything was mixing in his mind and he reopened his eyes rapidly, trying to forget all of this. He continued breathing heavily for a few more minutes, looking insistently at the light above the mirror, before being able to settle down. He heard Emily coming from the kitchen and rose, not wanting her to see him in such a state. He changed, brushed his teeth and went to bed, not saying anything. He lied there, looking at the ceiling, and extended his arm in a reflex when Emily came to bed and cuddled up with him. She turned the lights off and fell asleep like that, against him.

But as for him, Aaron couldn't sleep. He had tried everything, closing his eyes, concentrating on Emily's steady breathing, shutting down his emotions and thoughts, but nothing. His mom was coming back to his mind as soon as he was letting go, trying to fall asleep. He was thinking of everything he had done and not done with his mom all over the years, how they had fought when he had explained he would move to the U.S. to try and make a life, how she had been scared when he had told her he would make his life in politics, how sad she was every single time he had had to cancel a trip back home because of an emergency at the White House or the Congress when he was still working there. He thought of all the broken promises, all the bad things he had done when he was a kid, all of the good ones. He thought of the day when he had learned to bike without the training wheels and she had cheered so loud the whole neighborhood had known it. He thought of the day, when he was 13, when he had shoplifted in a bold move and had been yelled at by his mom and forced to bring back to the shop the things he had stolen. He thought of the day when she had learned he had had his first time with a girl, and he had been lectured because she thought he was too young for that. He thought of the first time he had driven with his mom next to him and she had screamed in fear because he had almost run a red light. He thought of the day he had had full scholarship to go study in the U.S. and his mom had cried of pride and happiness even though she was scared. He thought of the day when his mom had called 47 times in less than an hour because she had heard about the bombing at the Capitol but didn't know he wasn't there. He thought of the day he had presented Emily and his mom had instantly known she was the one. He thought of the day when he had announced Emily and him had eloped and that his mom had yelled at him, asking what she had done to have such a selfish son. He thought of the day when he had called to announce he would become a father and she had instantly screamed in the neighborhood she was about to be a grandmother again.

His tears were running down his cheeks, slowly. He wasn't making a sound, not wanting to wake up Emily, and turned his head to look at the clock. 3:30 a.m. He still had not managed to sleep and he knew a meeting was planned at the White House at 8:30 a.m. He was supposed to be the one going, and Emily was supposed to stay at home to take care of Inez. He felt Emily stretch out and she opened her eyes to realize Aaron was still not sleeping. His arm was numb from Emily sleeping on it for the past few hours.

"Have you slept at all?" she asked, still groggy.

"No…" he answered in a breath, honest.

She stood up and went to the kitchen without saying anything. Aaron didn't know what she was doing, but before he could actually ask, she was back with a glass of water and a pill.

"It's the sleeping pills I got after the bombing. I still have a couple. You should take it." Emily said, sitting on the edge of the bed next to him.

"I can't, I have to be up in 4 hours, I have this meeting…" he said but was cut short by Emily.

"I'll go. And I'll take care of Inez…"

"Daycare is closed, how are you going to do all that?" Aaron asked.

"I'll take her with me, I know Seth is going to be there, so he'll take care of her during the meeting. It won't be long anyway, and she'll probably sleep in her stroller."

"But…" he wanted to argue.

"Aaron… I can manage for one morning. Take that, you need to rest…" she said, putting her hand on his arm.

He didn't answer and extended his hand to take the pill. He wasn't really sure about it, he had never taken things like that before and he didn't really feel comfortable starting it. But she was right, he needed to sleep, he needed to forget about all of this for the night. He swallowed the pill and gave the glass back to Emily, who kissed him and put her free hand on his cheek, wiping the rest of his tears. He relaxed and turned on his side to find a comfortable position to sleep, and closed his eyes.

Emily walked back to the kitchen and drank a glass of water. She was feeling so sad for Aaron, she really hoped this pill would help him. Peeking through the bedroom door, she saw that Aaron already seemed calmer than before, and his breathing had already slowed down, finally managing to fall asleep. She took a blanket from the cupboard and walked to the couch where she decided to finish her night, not wanting to wake up Aaron with her alarm in a few hours. But in the end, she was the one who couldn't sleep anymore. She was just thinking about all of this. She was turning on the couch, not really comfortable, and she was thinking. She was afraid of all of this. How would Aaron deal with everything? How long did his mother have before dying? How was she feeling right now? When would they renew their vows? Would they fly everybody down to Mexico? Or would she be able to come all the way to Washington? She suddenly realized she would probably show when they would renew their vows, so it meant that she needed to find a dress she could fit her belly in. And then she thought about her daughter, who would probably not remember her grandmother because she is too young, and that unborn baby that Aaron's mom would probably never meet. She didn't really know how to deal with all of this, she knew she needed to be strong for Aaron, but she also knew that she needed to be very careful, she needed to watch over him. She was actually afraid he would have a breakdown. All of this was too much to handle, and she turned the TV on to try and change her mind, watching a rerun of a stupid TV show, and finally fell asleep for a couple of hours.


	27. The Vows

THE VOWS

Three months had passed since that night when Aaron had discovered his mother's illness. In these three months, Aaron had taken three days off to go see her in Mexico and had tried to overcome his fear of losing her. After coming back to Washington, he had called his mom almost everyday, asking how she was and worrying at any sign of her condition getting worse. She had been given 6 months to live, and chemotherapy had been put aside, since metastasis had already spread everywhere in her body. She seemed surprisingly fine though, at least on the phone. She knew she had not much longer to live, so she had decided to live these days fully as long as she could. Aaron was trying to shut down his emotions, but truth be told, at night when he was calling her, it was hard for him not to breakdown. Emily and Inez were the only two who were making his life more bearable, more worth to be lived.

Emily had had her first and her second ultrasound in those three months, and they had discovered that she had gotten pregnant only three months after Inez's birth. Therefore, she was now five months pregnant. Entering her second trimester had been very stressful for her, it was right at those times that she had lost their first baby, and even though Inez was born since then, she couldn't help but thinking about it. Thankfully, everything had been fine, and still was. For whatever reason, morning sickness had not been that bad, and she was very thankful for it. She was now showing, and everybody had been shocked to learn she was pregnant again such a short time after Inez. But at least this time, she had not had a denial of pregnancy, and nobody was whispering behind her back. Or at least she hoped so.

Aaron had hold onto his promise to renew their vows with Emily before his mom would pass away. They had talked about it for hours at night after Inez was in bed. Planning everything in three months had been quite of a challenge. Afraid of his mother's health degrading too quickly, they had decided to do in Mexico, in his hometown where his parents still were. They had therefore rented one of those private beaches over there, and had invited everybody to come down to Mexico. This had been a great concern for both Emily and Aaron, as they wanted everybody to be here for the renewal of their vows, but were not sure everybody could make such a trip.

They had flown down to Mexico with Inez a couple of days ago to start and prepare everything. They were staying at his parents house, and Emily had been shocked to see how weakened her mother-in-law seemed. She had not seen her since Inez's birth, and she had since then lost a lot of weight. Her stomach had been attacked by metastasis a month ago, and eating had become an everyday challenge. She also had metastasis on her lungs which made it hard for her to breathe. She had been given oxygen so she could breathe more easily, but she was a very stubborn person, just like her son, and she wanted to show everybody that she could live without it. Everybody knew how bad she felt, how close the end was, but still, she was faking it, wanting to prove how strong she was.

The day of the wedding, Emily was getting ready in Aaron's bedroom, helped with her mom and her mother-in-law. She was wearing a light white dress, mostly made of lace. The shape of the dress was underlining perfectly her baby bump. Sharon was already crying from seeing her daughter dressed like this. As for him, Aaron was in his parents' bedroom, getting ready with the men of the house. His dad and his father-in-law were chatting, making fun of Aaron for picking a complete outfit while it was 75 degrees outside. Aaron was already regretting his choice, he had wanted to be traditional, wearing a suit, but he knew it was too warm for that. It was only May though, but Mexico was always warm. Inez was downstairs playing with her uncle Javier, Aaron's brother, who had arrived early with Eva and kids to take care of his goddaughter. She was now almost 8 months old and very close to crawling. Her cousins were stimulating her, inciting her to come and crawl toward them, and she loved all the attention she was getting from them.

Nadia was the first to arrive at the beach and had been asked to welcome everybody, from Emily and Aaron's family to the President of the United States who had agreed to come officiate the wedding. Everybody was there, and they couldn't be more grateful for them to come all the way down to Mexico.

Except for Aaron, Emily and their fathers, everybody had now gone to the beach. Peter and William would drive Emily and Aaron over there. The already married couple had wanted a traditional ceremony for their renewal of vows, at least more traditional than their actual wedding, but had not resisted the will to walk down the aisle together. Therefore, Aaron was waiting downstairs for Emily to come out of the bedroom. He was about to call her when he heard the door opening. She was on top of the stairs, and she was stunning.

"Woah… You're… I'm speechless" he said, in awe at the sight of his wife.

"You don't look so bad yourself." she joked, joining him and kissing him softly.

For a couple of minutes they stayed looking at each other in the eyes, holding their hands. It was weird for them, because they knew they were already married, they knew all of this was just about renewing their vows, but it seemed like a real wedding anyway. They could feel the butterflies in their stomachs, just like when they had gotten married in Alaska. It was their time, and just theirs.

They finally walked outside the house where their dads were waiting for them, and Peter let a tear fall down his cheek when he saw his beautiful baby girl in her wedding dress. William's eyes were shining of pride. His youngest son was renewing his vows. He knew he was doing it today for Adriana, and he couldn't be more thankful for everything Aaron had done for her and for his family.

Arriving at the beach, they could see the Secret Service here and there, discreetly hidden not to disturb the peace of the ceremony. They came out of the car, and everybody rose from their seats to welcome them. At the end, waiting under the arch on the pedestal, they could see Tom Kirkman, always so professional, so invested in any mission he was entrusted with. Aaron and Emily walked down the aisle, hand in hand, slowly. They stopped just a few feet from the pedestal to kiss Inez who was in Nadia's arms, and finished their walk toward the President. He welcomed them in a friendly embrace, and everybody sat to hear him talk.

"I wrote a speech. For once, nobody helped me, not even Seth, so I apologize in advance if it's terrible." Tom Kirkman started, making everybody laugh. He then took a paper out of the pocket of his suit.

"Today, I am here in front of you because I consider you my friends. I know, I know I'm still the President of the United States, I'm still your boss, but this is not what matters on this day. I've known you for 5 years Aaron, 8 years Emily, and from the day you both met, I knew you would one day be together. It was probably not obvious to you when you were fighting to be my Chief of Staff, but I just knew by the way you were looking at each other that this would eventually happen. Let's be honest, even if you thought you were, you have never been good at hiding your feelings toward each other."

Everybody laughed again, and Aaron and Emily were blushing, remembering those crazy times.

"Over the months, I've seen you growing closer, and then one day, I just knew you were together. It took you a whole month to actually tell me the truth, but don't you even dare thinking I didn't already know it…"

Emily and Aaron looked intrigued, surprised by Tom Kirkman's revelation. They really had thought they had been discreet.

"The thing with having you as my two most trusted advisers is that I see you every single day. And even though the institution makes it hard to bond, to be friends, I can sincerely say that you have become friends to me, to my family. And I was truly honored when you asked me to officiate the renewals of your vows today."

Tom Kirkman paused for a moment, looking at Aaron and Emily, and then continued.

"I think it is now time for you, so, Emily I'll let you start".

Emily smiled softly at the President, thanking him for the amazing speech he had just given. Hormones were making her very sensitive, and she could feel herself about to cry.

"Aaron Alexander Shore. Do you remember? This is how I actually started my wedding vows, a year and a half ago. I'm starting these ones the same way, because nothing has changed in the way I feel about you since then. Life is still more beautiful because you are here, life is still more epic, life is still greater. Inez has entered our lives since these first vows, and she is already about to become a big sister. If five years ago, when we first met, somebody had told me we would be standing here today, I would have laughed. But truth is I wouldn't want my life to be any other way. There aren't a lot of days that I remember perfectly, but the day of our wedding is one of them. The day when Inez was born too. And today will be too. In each of these days, you are in my life, and this sums up simply why I love you so much. You are here. And having you here in my life makes it worth living it. So, it is with my heart full that I renew my original wedding vows. I still promise to love you, honor you, cherish and keep you. I continue to want you, for better or worse, for richer or poorer. Whatever the future may hold for us, we will always have our love. It is enough."

And here she was, letting happy tears fall down her cheeks. Her eyes were shining of happiness and love for Aaron, and her husband was invited by Tom Kirkman to say his vows. With his hand, Aaron wiped a tear off of Emily's cheek and took her hands in his.

"I'm not going to start these vows the same way I did it a year and a half ago. Not because I don't remember them, gosh no, I remember them word for word. But because I never thought I could love you more than I already did at the time. You made me a husband, you made me a father, you are the one who made me the man I am today. Nothing would have been possible without you, and I have no idea what I would have become if I had not met you, but I don't even want to know. Renewing our vows here in front of our family and friends is all I could have hoped for. I am here to be your supporter, your confidant, and your best friend. We have been through a lot together, laughter and tears, joy and sorrow, and through all those times, I can honestly say, I loved you every step of the way. I have been blessed for all these years with you and am thrilled that I get to spend the rest of my life with you. I love you"

Tom Kirkman smiled at both of them, and said.

"And this is with the greatest honor, that I declare you once more, husband and wife."

Everybody cheered and Aaron leaned to kiss tenderly Emily.

A little while later, everybody was gathered under the tents that had been put on the beach for the reception. Aaron and Emily were walking table to table, discussing with friends, thanking everybody for being there and making the whole trip down to Mexico. They also were catching up with old friends from college, and talking with their colleagues. Seth, Kendra and Lyor had also made the trip with the President and the First Lady and would come back to D.C. in the evening. Inez was with someone, they didn't even know who. They had barely spent any time with her, but they knew she was in good hands, wherever she was, probably with one grandmother or uncle. Emily was chatting with her brothers, she was so happy to see them. Being the only girl in the family, she had never been very close to them, but they had always been very protective with her, and she had not seen them in a while. Even though this was a special day and she couldn't spend as much time as she wanted with them, she was glad to have some family time with them. Daniel had come from Boston with his wife and the twins, and Emily couldn't believe how grown they had since the last time she had seen them on Skype. She was the godmother of one of the twins, and she missed them dearly. Michael, the younger brother, had come with his very new girlfriend. He was quite of a womanizer, and he was already engaged to this girl he had met three months ago. It was the fourth time he was getting engaged with a girl, and Emily knew better when she was looking at him so "in love" with this girl.

Aaron and Emily were then called on the dance floor for the first dance. It had taken them a good while to actually choose a song they could agree on, and then to learn how to dance on it. Emily wasn't bad at dancing, and Aaron had a few notions, but mastering the art for their first dance had been a challenge. They had decided to include Inez in the dance, and Aaron was holding her in his arms while waltzing with Emily. This had been another challenge, but they were really proud of how it had ended up.

In the evening, the President, his family and all the White House staffers said goodbye to go back to Washington D.C. to run the country. Emily and Aaron were so grateful they had stayed that long, and they thanked them before they left. Other friends started leaving soon after, and Aaron's parents left with Inez who needed a good night sleep. Adriana was looking exhausted, and she knew it was her cue to go to bed. Aaron was worried about her, he could hear her having a hard time breathing, but she was putting a brave face on it, reassuring him that she was fine. She had spent the whole day outside, not really taking it easy, and she could feel it was time for her to get a good night of rest. They had offered to take care of Inez during the night so that Aaron and Emily could spend the night together. The newly-rewed couple had therefore rented a cabin on the beach where they would spend the night just the two of them, a sort of second wedding night far away from the reality. Aaron and Emily kissed their daughter goodnight, feeling awkward to spend the night away from their daughter. It was the first time she would sleep in another place than them, and though they were happy to have the night for themselves, they were feeling anxious to the idea of not having their baby girl with them.

The party dragged on until the end of the night, and they danced, cheered and laughed with their family and close friends who had stayed. Even though Emily was 5 months pregnant, she was still feeling pretty well. Except for the need to take off her heels and to sit more often that she would normally do, she was feeling better than ever. It was not before 3 a.m. that Emily and Aaron ended up being alone. The cabin they had rented was not far from the party, and they walked there, hand in hand. When they arrived there, a crazy idea popped in Aaron's mind.

"Honey, you know what?" he started.

"You want to celebrate our vows and you have planned a very hot end of the night?" Emily tried.

"No… Well, yes. I definitely want to make love to my wife tonight. But that's not what I was thinking about… Have you ever done skinny dipping?"

Emily laughed.

"What? No, you're crazy. I'm not doing that… And I'm sure the water is cold." Emily said, raising an eyebrow.

"We're in Mexico, the water is the never cold… You however, are getting cold feet right now…" Aaron teased.

"I'm not! I'm pregnant! I can't do that while pregnant!" Emily exclaimed.

"And since when being pregnant prevents you from skinny-dipping?"

"Come on, Aaron, we are 36, parents and White House staffers. We can't do that!"

"Emily, it's three in the morning, we are in Mexico, and we just got married again. Come on, that's going to be fun!" Aaron pleaded.

Emily looked at Aaron intensely, thinking about it. The dim light of the cabin was the only one around them, and she could barely see his eyes, but she could still feel his look on her. She hesitated.

"Ok, let's do it. But you need to help me with this dress first" Emily nodded.

Aaron was ecstatic with Emily agreeing to go skinny-dipping. He felt like a teenager again, and he quickly helped her with her dress. She finished undressing on her own and walked toward the water, not super confident, but soon joined by Aaron who had undressed in the meantime.

"I can't believe we are doing that…" she said as he wrapped his arms around her.

"Believe it, cause it's real" he answered and started kissing her passionately.

Soon enough, they were back in the cabin, entangled. They made love, and it's only when the sun started rising that they fell asleep. The day had been prefect, they were happy, and nothing mattered more than the love they had for each other.


	28. The Goodbyes

THE GOODBYES

The morning after, Aaron and Emily arrived at his parents' house a little bit before twelve. They had not slept much, but were still feeling refreshed. After a night —a morning— just the two of them away from everything, they were ready to see their baby girl again. They had forgotten everything for one night, and it was now the time for them to go back to reality. They were scheduled to fly out to D.C. the morning after and go back to work two days later.

"Hey, we're back" Aaron called out when they entered the house.

They could hear Inez babbling with her granddad in the kitchen, and they put their bags in the entrance to go greet them. Aaron took Inez in his arms after saying hi to his dad. Inez was full of joy and smile when she saw her parents, and she was attacked by tons of kisses from her dad and her mom.

"Where is mom?" Aaron asked after giving Inez to Emily.

"She is upstairs, she is resting. She wasn't feeling fine this morning so she went for a nap." William answered.

"She should have taken it easier yesterday… I knew she should have…" Aaron said, concerned.

"But you know your mom, she's always pretending everything is fine. You're the same by the way…"

"I know I am. But still, I'm worried. She shouldn't exhaust herself like that…"

William sighed and sat on the chair next to the kitchen counter.

"Aaron… I know you don't want to see the reality. But it's the end, whether you like it or not. You have to prepare for this." William said, defeated.

"Dad, I know. But it's not because I know that I want it to happen. The doctors said she still has a few months to live."

Emily was listening discreetly, and she ran a hand down Aaron's back to make him feel she was there. She could hear in his voice that he was trying to keep composure in front of his dad. William gave up and continued preparing lunch while Aaron and Emily went back to giving their full attention to Inez. Aaron's brother was supposed to come with Eva and kids for lunch, and to meet Emily's family for dinner. They had so many things planned before their departure the day after. They wanted to do the most of their few days off, and it was hard to think that this moment of bliss was already almost over. That it was almost time to be back to their normal rhythm.

Lunch was ready a little while later, and Javier had arrived with Eva, Agustín and Alejandro. Everybody was chatting, laughing and catching up, when Aaron decided to go upstairs to wake his mom for lunch. He knocked on the door a couple of times but no answer. He half-opened the door, peeking through it, to see his mom still fast asleep.

"Mom, it's me. Lunch is ready." Aaron said. But no answer.

"Mom… Wake up…" he tried again.

But his mom wasn't moving. So he walked next to her and sat on the edge of the bed. He shook her arm a little bit to wake her up, but still no sign. And that's when he realized what was happening.

"Mom! Mom!" he exclaimed, shaking her arm, trying to wake her up.

In one instant, he was in tears, sobbing. He was still calling her out, but he knew it was over. Alarmed by his voice, Javier and William had climbed upstairs and entered the room to see Aaron, on his knees next to his mom. His heart had broken into million of pieces in just one instant. His mom was just in front of him, lying lifelessly, and he just couldn't believe it.

"Call an ambulance, please. Do something" he shouted to his brother and father.

But instead of doing so, Javier walked to him and took him in his arms, forcing him to back off from the bed. Javier had tears falling down his cheeks too, but was trying to keep his strength for Aaron and William. Their dad had walked to the bed and taken his wife in his arms, hoping she would come back to life.

"Why don't you call an ambulance?" Aaron screamed at his brother.

"It's too late bro… It's too late…" Javier answered, his voice hoarse, holding him as tightly as he could.

Everybody downstairs had understood what was happening, and they were staying there is silence, letting the three men of the family on their own to cope with what was happening. Even the kids had understood, nobody was talking anymore, nobody was moving. Inez was silent in her mother's arms. Emily was crying silently, sitting on the couch, Eva, was opposite her, crying too, with her two boys in her arms.

"Mommy, is grandma dead?" Agustín started.

"Yes honey…" Eva answered, holding him tighter.

"What does that mean?" Alejandro asked.

"It means we'll never see her again… She is in heaven now…" Eva tried to explain, trying to keep composure for her sons.

The kids were still young, and though they had explained it would happen soon, death was still a very foreign concept for them. 8-year-old Agustín had been told how sick she was and could vaguely understand that he would never see his grandma again. He had seen it too. Living not far from their grandparents, he had seen her health getting worse almost day by day. But for 4-year-old Alejandro, death and paradise were concepts too blurry to actually understand them. They could both feel their mom's pain though, and were not sure how to behave.

The silence continued for what they thought was too long. Nobody was talking, nobody was saying anything, and even upstairs, it was silent. The atmosphere was really heavy, and nobody knew what to do or what to say. It felt like an earthquake had struck in the house. Suddenly, Inez started whining, and Emily looked at her almost in horror, not knowing what to do with her. She knew it was time for her to lie down for a nap, but it meant going upstairs, and she just really didn't have the courage to do it. She considered for a bit going for a walk so that Inez could sleep in the stroller, but she wanted to stay there for Aaron. She was just helpless. She looked at Eva, pleading for help, but she was just as helpless as her. She stood up and paced around the house, trying to soothe Inez who had started crying.

"Emily, put her in the stroller and just rock it. Try it." Eva said, looking at a desperate Emily.

Emily smiled softly, thanking her for the idea, and brought the stroller in the living room. She laid Inez in it and put a blanket on it to block the light, and started rocking the stroller. After a little while, Inez started to calm down, and finally fell asleep. It was at that time that Aaron walked down the stairs, and Emily walked toward him to take him in her arms. He burst into tears in his wife's arms, and she just let him cry. He was a mess, there were no other words for it. He had never in his entire life felt such an aching pain in his heart. Javier then walked down the stairs, and Eva took him in her arms too. And then William, but nobody was there anymore to hold him. Agustín and Alejandro understood it, and they ran to their grandpa and hugged him as tight as they could.

And then everything started speeding up. Emily and Eva took the matter in their own hands, letting the men grieve aside. William, Javier and Aaron sat outside, not saying anything, sometimes still crying, completely passive. Emily called her parents, with whom they had planned dinner in the evening, and she then called the White House to ask for a few more days off. She cancelled the trip back to D.C. and did everything she could to avoid Aaron to think about all of it. Eva called the doctor so that he could come and certify the death, and then Adriana was taken away to the funeral home. They took the kids away, not wanting them to see this happening. They didn't want them to understand that Adriana was in this body bag, and they took them to the beach, trying to lighten a mood impossible to lighten. They all walked there, and sat on the sand, looking at the horizon. Aaron was looking at the water, Inez in his arms, and Emily behind him, holding him with her arms around his shoulders. It was as if he had everything he cared about, and still, a piece of him was missing.

The night came, and everything was still silent. It was a weird silence, half peaceful, half overwhelming. The adults were not talking, and just the kids starting to be kids again, whining, asking questions, watching TV and being grumpy was giving life to this house. Soon enough, it was time for the kids to go to bed, and Javier and Eva knew it was time to leave. They were reluctant to go back home, worried for William who would spend his first night alone, but they ended up leaving anyway, they didn't really have a choice. And it was just Aaron, Emily, Inez and William in this house, this big family house, where nobody knew what to do or what to say. Emily didn't know how to react, and she was just doing her best to ease the pain of her husband and her father-in-law. She cooked dinner, took care of everything. She even changed the sheets in the room where Adriana had just died, trying to erase any sign of what had happened during the day, but it was too hard. And she knew tomorrow would be even harder. They would say a last goodbye to Adriana, and it was going to be the hardest day of Aaron's life. Her parents had told her they would push back their flight to Connecticut to come to the ceremony, to be there for her, for Aaron and his family, and she felt so grateful. They were the best parents she could have ever wanted. She let a tear fall down her cheek at the idea of what Aaron had to go through today, and couldn't imagine the day she would have to go through that too. She was just trying to be strong, she was.

And then, the day after came, and they knew the hardest was to come. Aaron had not slept from the whole night, nor had his dad. They had ended up drinking beers on the sofa in the living room at four in the morning, reminiscing Adriana. They were both in tears, and the alcohol running down their throat and in their blood was helping to cope with everything. Aaron didn't know what he was feeling. His heart was broken, but he was still not sure he could realize what was happening. His heart was literally aching, and he thought it would never go away. It had never been that hard in his entire life. He knew Emily was here for him, but he just didn't know how to express his feelings, he didn't even know what he was really feeling.

In the afternoon, the whole family was reunited again, too soon, way too soon. But they were all back to Aaron's childhood home, embracing each other, comforting each other, trying to ease each other's pain. And then, it was time to say one last goodbye to Adriana. She was cremated, and they all walked down the beach to spread her ashes in the ocean. Everybody cried. They didn't even know it was possible to cry that much. They didn't even know they had that many tears in their body.

It was a sunny day, and it was so ironic because sunny May days were Adriana's favorites. They are the days when the tourists are not there yet, but the weather is perfect for a swim. And she would spend her days on the beach, reading books and enjoying the sound of the waves hitting the sand. This is where she would spend eternity, even though nobody was ready for it. But they didn't have a choice, and it was the first time not having a choice was the hardest thing they had to face.


	29. The Five Stages

THE FIVE STAGES

 **DENIAL**

Aaron, Emily and Inez had flown back to Washington only three days after the funeral. The day after, they were both already back to work, and Inez back to daycare. Aaron had woken up earlier than usual, and had left without Emily, being at work before dawn, and coming back from the White House after the sunset. Emily was letting him do his thing, she knew he was in a pure denial, and that work was his way to cope with the death of his mother. But after several days like that, she already couldn't stand it anymore. He had completely forgotten he had a daughter. She couldn't even say when was the last time he had seen her, and that was something Emily couldn't stand. And of course, Emily was pregnant, so she was emotional, and she was getting angry very fast, but she was crying very often too. She loved being pregnant, but having to deal with hormones when her husband was withdrawing into himself was really hard. It was true, he was doing so much work that she almost could have spend the day at home chilling, he was taking the workload for two. But it just wasn't healthy. Every time someone wanted to ask how he was feeling, a simple but sharp "I'm fine" was the answer. Emily was looking at him, she wanted to do something, but she was just a spectator and she couldn't do anything. It was really paining her to see her husband shutting her out like that.

"Hey, Em…" Aaron said knocking at her door one afternoon. "Do you have the papers for that executive order on the national parks?"

"The one scheduled for next week you mean?" Emily raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah… That one, I wanted to go over it once more before it is signed…"

"Aaron… It's for next week."

"Yeah I know, but I have time, so for once we are ahead in our work…"

"Aaron. Sit. Now." Emily demanded.

Aaron sighed but did as told.

"I'm fine, I assure you I'm fine." he said, knowing where she was going.

"And that's why you haven't seen Inez in four days?" Emily questioned.

A look passed on his face that she couldn't analyze and then he stood up.

"Emily, I know better than you whether I'm fine or not." he exclaimed.

And he slammed the door.

 **ANGER**

Aaron was in rage. He was so pissed by Emily who was telling him what to do or what to say. He couldn't believe she was like that. Why was she forcing him to feel the pain like that ? Why was she forcing him to care about things he didn't want to care about ? He knew he had not seen Inez in four days, he knew it, but he just couldn't. Because Inez still had her mother, and he didn't anymore. And all of this was just so unfair, because his mother had been nothing but love and caring for him, for his dad, for his brother. And she was gone now. And he wanted to yell, scream, and punch walls. He just really needed to scream at someone. And just at that moment, Seth knocked at his door and opened it.

"What again?" he yelled.

"Woah, slow down man. I just needed to see with you the memo I drafted." Seth excused himself.

"What memo again?" Aaron asked, still pissed.

"Don't worry, I'll go see Emily. Are you ok?" Seth asked.

"Don't I look okay? Damnit why does everybody ask me that?" he started getting angry again.

Seth gave up and left the room to knock next door. And when he entered, he saw Emily with her eyes red.

"Emily, what is going on?" he asked, walking to her desk.

"Nothing, Aaron just yelled at me. And I'm hormonal. I'm fine." Emily tried to explain.

"So he's doing his "5 stages of grief" trip?" Seth asked, quoting in the air.

"You think so?" Emily asked, wiping the tears off her cheeks.

"Well, you said he was shutting down since his mother died. And now he is definitely pissed off. So it looks like it…" Seth answered.

"And so what are the next steps?" Emily asked, half curious, half sarcastic.

"Hum. If I remember well the stupid psychology book I read, I think the next one is the "if only" step. And then there is depression. And then he should finally accept it. Or that's something like that, I can't remember exactly…"

"I'm really not looking forward to it… You know he hasn't seen Inez in four whole days? This morning he was at the White House at 5 a.m…" Emily said, feeling the need to get everything off her chest.

"Well, I'm here if you need me while he is somewhere else…"

"But he shouldn't be somewhere else!" Emily exclaimed. "I know he lost his mom. And I don't even want to imagine how I will be when it will happen to me. But he has me, he has a daughter. He has friends like you to rely on. And I'm pregnant for goddamnit sake's!" Emily started being angry too.

"Em… Everybody deals differently with grief… You cannot hold what he does now against him."

"I know… But it's hard… He just doesn't talk."

A few days later, Aaron was still not talking. And he was still angry at everybody all the time. Things had changed though. He was leaving for work later, but he was still waking up early. Instead of going to work, he was going for a run in the park not far from their apartment. He was running for a good hour before going back to shower and eat breakfast. It was his way of tiring himself out before going to work, and to canalize his energy. He knew he was angry at everybody all the time. He had even made Emily cry several times, but he felt like he couldn't do anything about it. So instead of going back home straight from work, every night he was going boxing. He was punching, punching and punching again, trying to exhaust himself. Boxing was his thing when he couldn't hold anymore. But truth be told, he had not done it in a while. Last time he had boxed was probably when Emily had lost the baby. And the time before, when he had resigned from the White House after the investigation. So yeah, he wasn't boxing often, but right now, he just needed that. He felt like he was a ball of anger ready to snap at everybody and everything all the time. But that night, he had punched too hard, and the punch ball had come back in his head. And it struck him. Literally. He could have done something to avoid his mother's death.

 **BARGAINING**

He came home that night and showered, thinking about all of the things he could have done to prevent his mother's death. And then, he walked to the living room where Emily was feeding Inez with her last bottle for the day. He sat on the coffee table in front of Emily and asked.

"Why didn't I think of sending my mom to the best doctor in D.C.?"

Emily wasn't really sure how to behave. Would he snap at her again ? But in the meantime, he looked different. He didn't look mad. It seemed like all the anger in his eyes had faded. He looked tired, and he had a bruise on the arch of his eyebrow. She was worried, but she knew he had been boxing the past few days, so she was not super surprised by the bruise. It took her a while before finding an answer she hoped would suit him.

"Because you knew no doctor in the world could have cured her ?" she tried.

"But you know it's not true… I'm sure there is a top oncologist who could have saved her…" he answered.

"Why are you so sure about it?" Emily asked.

"Because she was too young to die. She was supposed to live at least 20 years more…"

"Aaron…" Emily wanted to answer

"Why didn't she see she was sick earlier?"

Emily just didn't know what to answer to that. So she just let him talk. At least, for once he was talking. She knew he still wasn't himself, but at least he was talking.

"I feel guilty. I could have done more for her. Since I've been working at the White House, I've let her down…" Aaron continued.

"You have not let her down Aaron. Not her, not anyone." Emily retorted.

"I have. Emily, look, it's been what, 4 years we are together? I'm sure you can count on your hands the number of times I've called my parents in those 4 years…"

"If I had a hundred hands, yes…"

"Emily, don't lie to me just to make it better…"

"I'm not lying. I know you haven't seen them as much as you want to. But it doesn't mean you have let them down. You have an extremely busy job, and you live far away from them. It's not easy to go back there. Look, I have seen my parents maybe once more than you, and they live in Connecticut, it's only a few hundred miles from here. Your parents live thousands of miles away…"

Aaron didn't answer. He was thinking, thinking and thinking again. His mind was racing about the different things he could have done to prevent his mother's death. He was feeling guilty. And it was eating him up. That night, he didn't get much sleep. Not that he had gotten much anyway since his mother had passed away, but his sleep was filled with dreams, thoughts and questions. Why had she not seen a doctor earlier? Why didn't she try to fight? Why didn't she ask for another medical opinion? Why didn't he take her to another doctor? Why didn't he force her to do so? Why was he such a terrible son?

All those questions spent days echoing in his mind. At work, at home, all he could think about was "why?" People always leave they said. But still, he had hoped until the last second that she would make it. Even though he had seen her health getting worse, he still had had hope. He had even prayed, something he had not done in a very, very long time. Probably since he had stopped being a kid. He had implored who knows up there to keep his mother alive.

But that hope had faded in one instant when he had seen her lying on her bed, lifelessly. Yes, she was dead.

 **DEPRESSION**

It was a Sunday night when it struck him. He was sitting on the couch, watching TV, while Emily was taking care of Inez. He had closed his eyes for an instant, and the scene had popped in front of his eyes. His mom, laying lifelessly in her bed, and him, calling her, trying to wake her up, screaming, doing whatever he could to wake her up. But no, she was dead. Instant tears fell on his cheeks, running down without wiping them off. He knew she was dead, but he still couldn't quite accept it. He heard Emily walk nearby, and he said out loud.

"She's dead."

Emily stopped in her walk toward Inez's bedroom and looked at Aaron. His eyes were still closed, his cheeks were wet from the tears running, and she wasn't sure if his statement needed an answer or not. But he said it again.

"She's dead."

So she answered.

"Yes, she is."

She sat on the armrest of the couch next to him, Inez still in her arms, and he rested his head on her side. He was just feeling so sad, so terribly sad. He felt like life wasn't worth it anymore.

"Do you sometimes wonder why we were not in the Capitol bombing?" he asked.

"Aaron!" Emily exclaimed, shocked.

"What, we're all gonna die one day, right?"

"Because it wasn't meant to be. Because somehow you were not there, and I wasn't either. There is a greater design in all of this…"

"Sometimes, I wish I were in the Capitol that night…"

"Aaron, you cannot say that. I won't allow you to say that." Emily threatened.

"Or what? You know we are all gonna die. I'm not sure life is worth all those sacrifices."

"So… Inez is not worth it? I am not worth it? Your dad is not worth? What about your brother?" Emily started enumerating, irritated.

"But she's dead…"

"And you are alive…"

Emily stood up, annoyed he would make such comments, and left to continue her business with Inez. But Aaron was just sad. And he didn't know whether life was worth it or not, whether these 36 years he had spent were a loss of time or not.

And for days, it went on like that. Once again, he wasn't talking anymore. He was just thinking about the meaning of life, and why he had survived and his mom had not. All of those close calls were coming back to his mind. The reason why he wasn't in the Capitol that night when everything fell apart. The reason why he didn't die when he ran the red light once. The reason why he didn't die when he went to Afghanistan with Kirkman. Why was he a survivor and his mom wasn't? And he needed comfort, he needed someone to listen and to talk. He wanted to talk to Emily, but he could feel he was a burden for her. She was the one taking care of their daughter, of him, doing the job. She was doing everything in the house and at work. And he couldn't let himself talk to her, because it would be too much.

 **ACCEPTANCE**

A few weeks later, Aaron could finally see the end of the tunnel. He was finally okay with the loss. He was still thinking about his mom every second, and he could see her everywhere he was walking, from the corner of the street to the latest ad for Walmart. He was not really back to his normal self, but he could talk about it, and he was behaving almost normally. There were still things he couldn't do, like laughing at Seth's bad jokes or singing cute lullabies with Inez. He still had a hard time having fun, but he was feeling better. And he was finally able to call his dad or his brother. He had neglected them so much after his mom's death. He had just cut all the strings that were leading him to think that his mom was not there anymore. He had not called them for weeks. But now, he was feeling guilty for not being strong enough for his dad, for not sticking up to him, and for not worrying about him.

And here he was, on a Friday night, at home. Emily had sat on the couch, next to him, and Inez was playing with his hair. As she pulled his hair a little too strongly, he realized that he had not been there for her, or for Emily either.

"I'm sorry…" he started.

"For what?" Emily asked.

"Everything. I've let you down since my mom died. I've let Inez down. I've let everybody down."

"Aaron, you're grieving… It's normal."

"But still, I'm realizing now that I have not been there at all for you… I'm really feeling bad for that."

"Honey, it's normal not to be yourself. I would be worried otherwise." Emily argued.

"Let me take Inez to bed. I'm going to take care of her."

"You sure?"

"Yes, please."

So he took Inez in his arms and went to her room to do their pre-sleep ritual. The pyjama, the light, the music, everything. But instead of putting her down to bed, he sat on the rocking chair and kept her in his arms, and let her fall asleep in his arms. It's only half an hour after she had fallen asleep that he put her in her bed, and walked back to the living room. Emily was preparing dinner, and he just took her in his arms. No words, no sound, nothing. He just took her in his arms, and suddenly, she was the one crying. For her, it felt like he was finally back to life, back to talking, back to expressing his emotions, back to leaning on her for support. And she was just so hormonal, so all the little things were making her cry. She had almost cried five minutes earlier when cutting a pepper, so finally feeling Aaron's arms around her was too much to handle. But in that moment, they both knew they would be fine.


	30. The Cries

THE CRIES

"Aaron, I can't find the right screws for the crib…" Emily whined.

She was 8 months pregnant and really exhausted. Hormones were driving her crazy, and anything could irritated her. Right now, it was just now being able to put together all the pieces of the new crib as she was sitting on the floor of their new apartment. They had started moving things a few days ago, and except for the bedroom of the new baby, almost everything was now here. They were going to finally sleep in their new apartment tonight, granted that Aaron would manage to put everything together in Inez's bedroom before she was back from daycare. Even if they knew Inez was still too young to realize fully all of this, they were actually a bit worried of how things would go for her first night in her new bedroom.

"I'm coming." Aaron said from the other room.

And Emily could feel herself about to burst into tears. Damn hormones. Damn pregnancy. Damn everything. And she couldn't even stand up on her own anymore. It was just too hard to rise from the floor.

"Help me stand up please…" Emily whined again when Aaron entered the room.

He chuckled, amused by his wife's despair and irritation.

"That is not funny! It's your fault if I'm not able to stand up…"

"Huh… Sorry hon, but I'm pretty sure it takes two to get pregnant…"

Emily crossed her arms, pouting.

"Did you finish putting Inez's crib together?" she asked, still pouting.

"I did, she has a bed for tonight… And so do we. We are finally ready to move in." Aaron smiled.

It felt good to see Aaron smile though, and Emily suddenly relaxed at the sight of him being happy. In the past 3 months, she had not seen him like that very much. Since Adriana's death, Aaron's mood had been a rollercoaster. One day he could be angry, the other one depressed, and the next happy. Finding a new apartment in those conditions had been a struggle, and Emily had done her best to relieve Aaron from all these concerns. She had taken the lead, calling real estate agents and visiting apartments a first time before showing them to Aaron. Added to that, she had done most of the work at the White House too, and she had been taking care of Inez most of the time. Also, their intimate life had been quasi nonexistent in these three months, and it had corresponded with Emily being horny all the time. Frustration had been at its peak for many reasons and she was ready for everything to be back to normal. Saying these three months had been hell would be an understatement. But still, she was holding on, because she loved Aaron so much, and she knew it was just a bad time that would vanish soon.

"So, what do we have to do left? Except, obviously… This…" Emily pointed out at the crib.

"Well, there are a few boxes you can empty in the kitchen, and I can finish Inez's bedroom."

"What about this room? Aaron ! I'm 8 months pregnant…" Emily exclaimed.

"Yeah, so we still have a month to do everything…"

"Inez was born a month early… You're not putting up a crib while I'm giving birth to our child!"

"Emily… It's not because Inez was a premature baby that this one will be…"

"If ever, I give birth to this baby, and the crib is not ready…" Emily threatened, and left the room angry.

Damn hormones… She started crying and sat on a chair in the kitchen. She was just so tired. She had done a lot of crying in the past 3 months, she couldn't even count the number of times she had hidden to cry. And it was weird for her, because usually, she wasn't hiding to cry, Aaron always knew when she was crying he was there for her. But in three months, he had caught her crying only once.

 _"Emily, what is going on?" Aaron said as he walked into the bedroom_

 _It had caught Emily off guard, she had hidden in their bedroom to cry, and she didn't think Aaron had heard her. He had not heard her the previous times, so she thought she was good at hiding to cry, but obviously, not this time._

 _"Nothing…" she said, pushing Aaron away while he was trying to take her in his arms._

 _"Emily… I know you…" Aaron argued._

 _"It's nothing, just the hormones." Emily answered._

 _"Hormones are a thing Emily, not an excuse."_

 _It was a Sunday night, and Emily had been doing everything in the house for the past few days. Aaron had been in a particularly bad mood, and Emily had done her best to avoid him to worry about anything. She had been on the verge of crying a good number of times in those past few days, but it was just too much now. But she couldn't tell Aaron that. He was still grieving, he had other things to worry about. He couldn't worry about her and her damn hormones._

 _"What is going on Emily?" Aaron continued._

 _"I'm just tired…" Emily continued to lie._

 _"Emily…" Aaron scolded._

 _"I've been looking at apartments for days, and I cannot find anything good. And I'm almost 7 months pregnant, and the time that we move in and everything, and I know that you have other things on your mind right now…"_

 _"Woah woah woah. Hold on. Wait a sec. You've been looking at apartments? I have other things on my mind? Why didn't you tell me?" Aaron looked at Emily, surprised with the confession._

 _"You know…" Emily tried._

 _"Em… I know. I know how I am right now, I know I am struggling. But you can still lean on me…" Aaron said._

 _"No, it's your turn to lean on me. You are the one who needs me right now. Not the contrary…" Emily cried some more._

 _And Aaron took her in his arms. And she was leaning on him again. And she was hating herself for that._

That night, she promised herself to hide herself better to cry, she promised herself that she would never cry again in front of him until he was fine. She had hold onto that promise, and she was determined to continue. So she shook her head, drank a full glass of water, and tried to think about something else. She looked at the clock and realized it was almost time to pick up Inez from daycare. Aaron and Emily had managed to get the day off together, which was a huge relief since it had not happened in a while, especially on a week-day. So she decided to change in an attempt to look more presentable at daycare, and she called Aaron so that they could go through their old apartment to take a few boxes before picking up Inez.

Arriving at their old apartment, Emily was caught off guard with the memories that this place carried for them. It was now almost empty, only a few boxes were left, but so many things had happened there. She was walking in all the rooms, slowly, letting her fingers trace lines along the walls on this place. In the bedroom, she was looking at the spot were the bed used to be. So many times they had made love in this bed, so many times they had wished to stay in it in the morning instead of going to work, so many times they had collapsed on it, exhausted with a 17-hour day at work. And then, she walked to the bathroom. And she was taken with flashes oh her throwing up in the toilet at the beginning of her pregnancy. She laughed slightly, remembering these times when she was wondering why she had to go through all of this to grow a baby inside of her. And then, she walked to the spare bedroom, that had become Inez's bedroom. Her crib was not there anymore, the rocking chair either. Only a couple of frames were still hung on the walls, but Emily could still remember the day they had brought her back home. They had taken the plane with a 2 weeks old baby, and Emily had been stressed like hell. Emily could remember all the nights she and Aaron had spent trying to soothe Inez in this room, all the nights they had read books and sang lullabies.

And then, Emily put her hand on her 8-month pregnant belly, and this time, she couldn't hold her tears. She started feeling them falling down her cheeks, and she heard Aaron coming behind her, and then she felt him wrapping his hands around her, putting his hands on her belly.

"Hormones again?" Aaron asked softly, chuckling.

"No… Just memories." Emily answered.

"Of ?"

"Our life, together. It was our first apartment together. It's just weird to leave it…"

"I know. It's weird for me too. But we're gonna have so many more memories in the new one." Aaron said in an attempt to reassure her.

Emily turned around and wrapped her hands around Aaron's neck and rested her head against his chest.

"Can you realize everything that's happened since we moved in this apartment?" Emily asked.

"Oh yeah… I can. Marriage, kids. This apartment has seen everything." Aaron answered.

"It has…"

They stayed there, at the entrance of what was once Inez's bedroom, for a time none of them could count. Emily felt safe, comfortable with Aaron's arms wrapped around her. She was in trustful hands. And then, an idea popped in her mind. She pulled back from Aaron a little bit and looked at him.

"Do you want to make one last memory in this apartment? We have an hour left before daycare closes." she said with a grin.

"Emily Shore… What are you thinking about precisely?" Aaron answered, knowing very well what she actually wanted.

"Well, my horny phase is kinda gone, but it doesn't mean I don't want to have sex anymore…"

"Do you seriously wanna do that on the floor?

"Who said anything about the floor ?" Emily asked.

"Well… No offense, but it's kinda hard to lift you against the wall with your belly. And you know I don't like taking you from behind."

"Who said anything about the wall…" Emily continued maliciously, looking straight toward the kitchen.

"Kitchen counter? Are you serious?"

"Why not… I don't know why, but we've never tried it before. And unlike our bed, it's still there…"

Emily took the lead and took Aaron's hand to walk with him in the kitchen, and she pulled him toward her, starting to kiss him eagerly.

"I'm gonna need help to climb though…" she said.

Aaron chuckled and put his hands on her hips, helping her up on the counter. Soon, Emily had pulled Aaron back toward her, and was kissing him languorously, feeling the need build up inside of her. She was already unfastening his belt and the zip of his jeans.

"Eager?" he asked with a smirk.

"You have no idea how much…"

Emily was wild, and Aaron couldn't complain about it. It didn't take them long to make one, and not much more to come down from their high. But as she was sliding down from the kitchen counter, she started crying again. And she didn't even know why. It was stupid, she was crying after an orgasm. She felt so stupid to be so emotional. While getting dressed, Aaron noticed, and put his hand on her arm, worried.

"Em… Did I hurt you? Did I do anything wrong?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No… Hormones. Again." she answered.

Damn hormones…


	31. The Walk

THE WALK

It was a Sunday afternoon and Aaron had just come back from work. There had been an emergency at the White House, and Aaron had been called at 6 in the morning. A boat from the US Seventh Fleet had navigated the waters of the South China Sea, and the current situation of the sea had made it almost impossible for the boat to get out of this mess. Nobody really knew why the boat had navigated those waters, but it had been hell to extricate the boat out of it. As soon as it had entered the South China Sea, several countries had wanted to attack it, and Aaron couldn't believe they had managed to save this boat and the men in it. It had taken them the whole morning, and Emily had offered to go instead of Aaron, but with her due date coming soon, Aaron was refusing to let her near the White House when he could be there instead.

After arriving at home, Aaron had changed into more comfortable clothes, not that he would wear a suit on a Sunday morning, national security emergency or not. He had noticed how tired Emily looked, and he had rubbed her back during Inez's nap, and he was now taking care of his daughter, appreciating the moments he could have with her alone. He knew it was one of the last times he would be alone with her. Inez would have a baby brother or a baby sister very soon, and to be honest, he didn't really know whether he was quite yet ready or not to be a father again, and to see his daughter becoming a big sister.

He was sitting on the floor, not far from the couch, and Inez was standing up, holding it, not really sure of the strength in her legs. She had already made a few steps, but always holding something, whether it was the corner of a table or her mom or dad's finger. Aaron had tried to stimulate her a lot in the past few days, he knew she was close to walking, but every single time he was calling her, she would just start crawling instead of trying to walk. Aaron was a bit desperate to say the least.

"Emily! Emily! Come here! Quick!" Aaron called from where he was..

"What?" Emily hurried as fast as she could with her 9-month pregnant belly.

But she stopped suddenly, looking at Inez. She was standing on her own, and was making tiny steps toward her dad.

"Oh my God…" Emily exclaimed, her eyes wide open, not moving.

Inez was walking. She would turn one in just a few days, and she was already walking. It was crazy to see how fast she was growing. She had grown so fast in the past few months. Emily felt like it was only a few days ago Inez had started crawling. And only a few months she had started baby food. But no, it was real, Inez was about to turn one year old and she was walking.

Emily started reacting again, walked toward Inez and Aaron and sat on the floor, just a couple of feet from Inez, who was now in her dad's arms.

"Can you do that again for mommy?" Emily asked, extending her arms toward her daughter.

But instead of doing so, Inez sat down and started crawling toward her mom. Aaron laughed, and Emily pouted. Arriving toward her mom, Emily took Inez in her arms to help her stand up again. And then, Aaron called Inez to make her walk toward him. And she did. She walked toward him. Aaron laughed even more, and Emily pouted even more. Inez fell in her dad's arms, and he kissed her little cheek, so proud of her. Aaron was over the moon to see his daughter make her first steps. With their jobs, he had feared not being able to see that, but she had made her first steps while both Aaron and Emily were at home.

"Hey baby, can you walk toward Mommy? She's sad you're not walking toward her…" Aaron said in Inez's ear.

"Mama?" Inez said.

Aaron and Emily looked at each other and then back at Inez.

"Wait what? What did you just say?" Emily asked.

"Mama." Inez answered again.

"Oh my God, are you talking too?" Emily exclaimed, tears in her eyes.

And then, Inez released her grip on Aaron's hand and made a few steps toward Emily. Emily extended her arms as much as she could and took started holding Inez when she was within her reach. Emily kissed Inez and held her tight, so happy.

"Can you say it again? Mama?" Emily asked.

"Mama! Mama! Mama!" Inez exclaimed.

And now it was Aaron's turn to be jealous. He was so happy she had walked with him first, but he was just so jealous she had not said "Papá" first. It was stupid, he knew that, but he was just being a father.

"Can you say Papá"? he asked in Spanish.

"Mama!" Inez answered.

And now it was Emily's turn to laugh.

"Ask her in English?" Emily tried.

"No, I'm speaking Spanish to her!" Aaron exclaimed, frustrated. "Can you say Papá?" he asked again.

"Mama" Inez said again…

"Where do you think she gets her stubbornness from?" Emily laughed.

Aaron glanced at Emily, pouting.

"Yeah, you can talk about stubbornness, for sure…" Aaron teased.

Inez was still in Emily's arms, and Emily whispered in her ear.

"Hey baby, say "Papá"."

"Mama" Inez answered.

"Well, I guess it's not for today then…" Aaron said, saddened.

A few days later, Aaron's dad had arrived in Washington for Inez's birthday, and Javier had come with Eva and the kids too. Aaron had insisted on them coming together for Inez's birthday. Adriana had passed away 4 months ago, and though Aaron had started getting a grip back on his feelings, he knew it was still hard for his dad. Aaron had not had the courage to go back down to Mexico, to his childhood home, where he had seen his mom dying. So he had not seen his dad in four months, and he knew it sucked. He was feeling guilty about it every single day, and making his family come to D.C. was a way for him to make it up for his absence.

They had all sat in the living room, chatting about this and that, but Emily's due date, which had been the day before, was the main topic among other things. They were also talking about Inez who had started walking, and they were all trying to make her walk toward one or the other. But still, Aaron was the one who was the most successful. Every single time Aaron was calling Inez, she would walk, while she would crawl if someone else was calling her. Aaron was just so proud to be Inez's favorite. But she still had not said "Papá" and he was frustrated with that. Since she had started saying Mama, she had been babbling a lot, asking for Emily all the time and pointing at her every single time she was in her sight.

It was around three in the afternoon, Inez had been put down for a nap and Aaron decided to go out for a walk with his dad and his brother. He wasn't really sure it was such a good idea since he had not been alone with them since Adriana's death, but he knew it was needed. He needed to talk with them, to keep this bond. He couldn't fail them. He knew he couldn't, but still, it was always hard to talk with them. He had never been good at expressing his emotions with them, he had always been closer to his mom, but now he only had them to rely on, because Adriana wasn't there anymore. They walked along the river and close to the Lincoln memorial, looking at the tourists and enjoying the fresh air of the beginning of October.

"It feels good to be here." William said. "It's good to get a change of air."

"You can stay here as long as you want Dad, you know that." Aaron answered.

He knew very well what William was referring to, and it was hurting Aaron's heart to feel his dad so desperate and so traumatized.

"Oh, you know. You have your life here, I don't want to disturb you…" William started.

"Dad!" Javier and Aaron exclaimed.

"Come on, it's true. Washington is not a place for me. It's yours Aaron. You have Emily here, and Inez. And another baby soon…"

"It doesn't mean you are not welcome and that you cannot stay here. There is a room for you, you can stay whenever you want, for as long as you want."

"I'm sure Emily would be bored with me…"

"Emily loves you. You know that…" Aaron argued.

Aaron and Javier looked at each other while their dad was walking a few steps ahead of them, alone in his thoughts. They slowed down a bit to talk apart from William, who was too deep in his thoughts to notice anything.

"Has he been like that since…" Aaron couldn't say it.

"Since mom died? Yeah… You can say it you know…" Javier answered.

"No I can't, I just can't. I know it's real, I've accepted it, but it's just too hard for now."

"It is hard for Dad too. You know, he has not slept in their bedroom since mom is gone…" Javier said.

"What? But where is he sleeping then?" Aaron said, taken aback by the revelation.

"On the couch most of the time, when he can actually sleep. And I've forced him to sleep in my bedroom a few times. But I don't think he has set one foot in their bedroom in the last four months…"

"We need to do something…"

"I know, I've tried to talk some sense in his mind, make him consider selling the house, finding a new place. But he just doesn't want to think about it…"

"Sell the house? But…" Aaron stammered.

"Yeah I know. It's our childhood home. I don't want it either. But he needs it. And we all need it."

"You're right. I don't see myself going there anymore either…"

Aaron and Javier joined their dad who had sat on a bench, looking at the fountain. And Aaron was thinking. Saying goodbye to this house would be hard, but Javier was right, it was for the best. William needed it. Aaron was trying hard not to break in front of his father or brother, but the truth was that having them here was bringing back the memory of his mom not being with them, and it was only making it more real that she was gone. He had accepted it, but he was still struggling with the thought of it.

The three men sat on that bench for a while, not saying anything. Looking in the distance, the peace of the landscape was bringing the needed comfort as theirs hearts were still healing from the loss. Javier and Aaron were both on one side of William, as if they were supporting him, helping him overcome all of this, none really being sure who was the strongest or if they could actually do it.

And then, they came back home where everybody was waiting for them. Emily's parents had arrived too and they were greeted by everybody. They were coming down from Connecticut for Inez's birthday and they had also planned to stay for the birth of the new baby. Inez was woken up from her nap and was eating in her high chair. Her smile was contagious and everybody smiled as she pointed at her dad when she saw him coming inside the apartment. She started making noise and babbling.

"Papá! Papá! Papá!"

There. She had said it. She had finally said it.


	32. The Second

THE SECOND

Inez was one year old. It was it. Everybody was there to celebrate, and Inez had been covered in gifts, kisses and more attention that she could ever hope for. It was late at night now, and people had started leaving as Emily and Aaron were supposed to go to work the day after. Everybody was telling Emily she should stay home and rest, that it was safer since her due date was two days ago and she would give birth very soon now, but she just needed to live a normal life until the last minute. Aaron had already carried around Emily's maternity bag, ready, for the past two weeks, which had annoyed Emily a lot. He had also insisted numerous times for Emily to take it slow, but Emily was just stubborn. So stubborn. So instead of forcing her to stay at home, which she should have done just like any mother-to-be, Aaron had decided to do all the work, and she was basically on desk duty, taking calls and scheduling things for Aaron. She really didn't like that, but truth be told, it would be slightly unprofessional to have her water breaking in the middle of an important meeting at the Capitol or in the command ops. For Inez, her water had broken in the middle of a backstage room after a rally, and it had already been enough embarrassing like that. She had felt really bad, and in the heat of the action, they had run to the hospital, not worrying about anything else.

All of this was bringing back sweet memories to Emily, and as she was laying in bed, at night, with Aaron's arm wrapped around her, she couldn't help but to think about that day. It had taken 20 hours to give birth to Inez, and she had really thought she wouldn't make it. It had been so hard, so intense, so painful. It was just a weird mix that Emily couldn't describe: a mix of intense pain and pure bliss. That day had made Emily a mother. It had made Aaron a father. It was the best day of their life. She could remember it like it was yesterday.

Emily was trying to find a comfy position in the bed, she was tossing. Her back was hurting, even laying in the bed. It was basically hurting all the time now.

"I can't wait for this baby to come" she murmured, not sure whether Aaron was sleeping or not.

"Do you want me to rub your back?" he asked, half asleep.

"No, sleep, I'll be okay." Emily grumbled a bit.

Aaron sat up, cross-legged, and helped Emily sitting too.

"You don't have to do that…" Emily said softly as Aaron starting to rub her back.

"I'll do everything for my wife, you know that…" he said, kissing gently her shoulder.

He rubbed her back for a few more minutes, and then they both lied back down. Emily was feeling better, not quite yet comfortable, but better. She finally found a position to fall asleep and Aaron fell asleep as soon as his wife stopped tossing around.

A few hours later, Emily was woken up by pains in her lower stomach. She could clearly understand what it was: Contractions. Finally, the baby was coming. But the contractions were still very much apart, and were just preventing her from going back to sleep. She was looking at the clock every two minutes, finding the time very slow. And she didn't want to wake up Aaron, so she was trying her best not to move much, but it was really hard to stay in a position when her back was just so sore. Hours were going by so slow, and she took her phone on her nightstand to start playing some stupid game she never had the time to play. She was counting the time in between each contraction too, but she wasn't worried. She didn't want to go to the hospital too soon. Spending twenty hours in the maternity ward last year had vaccinated her, and she wanted to take her time. And they were living only ten minutes away from it, so she knew that they could be there in no time if ever things were starting to speed up.

It was five in the morning, and she knew Aaron would wake up soon. He had set up his alarm for 5:45, and he would leave for work an hour later. Technically, Emily was supposed to arrive at work an hour later after dropping Inez at daycare, but she highly doubted that she would go today. Contractions were starting to be more intense and closer, but still not quite enough to go to the hospital. And then, suddenly, she felt wetness in between her legs. And she knew it was it. It took her a few minutes to decide what to do, but a new contraction stronger than the others made her take that decision. She shook Aaron's arm a bit, waking him up slowly.

"Aaron…" she said softly.

"What? No… There isn't any emergency at the White House…" he grumbled.

Emily laughed.

"Aaron… My water just broke."

The sentence woke Aaron up with a start.

"Wait what? Now? Oh my God. Are you serious?"

"Yes I am. Don't panic. We still have time, I've been counting for the past three hours." Emily said.

"You've been awake for three hours?" Aaron asked, his voice still hoarse.

"Yeah, I've started feeling contractions at 2…"

"Why didn't you wake me up?"

"Because neither you or I could do anything, the contractions were too much apart to do anything."

"Why do you sound so calm?" Aaron stood up and started getting dressed rapidly.

"Because I've been through this once. I know how it works now. And I don't want to spend 20 hours in an ugly hospital gown if I don't have to."

"Oh. My. Gosh. You're freaking me out…" Aaron said, really worried.

"Aaron. Stop. Now. Come help me get out of this bed. I want to take a shower and get dressed."

"Are you really taking a shower now? Em… You're in labor!"

Aaron was freaking out. His heart was racing, and seeing his wife so calm was making him freak out. It was crazy to see how the roles had reversed in a year. For Inez, Emily was the one panicking, and Aaron was the one calm —or faking to be. This time, it was just the opposite. Emily seemed just so calm, and he hated that. He didn't know how far apart were Emily's contractions, and he was just really stressing out she would give birth at home or on the way to the hospital.

"Aaron. Please… Can you just help me with the shower? I just want you to hold me in case I have a contraction"

"Oh my gosh you're really freaking me out." Aaron said in a despair.

"Please, stop saying that. I know what I'm doing…"

So Aaron didn't say anything else and just mumbled incomprehensible things. His mind was racing, he could imagine so many possible scenarios where Emily would not give birth at the hospital. Emily forced him to take a shower too, insisting that he had the time. So he did, but it was probably the quickest shower he had ever taken. And then, Aaron called their deputies, saying they wouldn't be at the White House today. And while Aaron was waking up his dad to ask him to take care of Inez, Emily was changing the sheets of their bed. It's true, she wasn't doing it as fast as she would normally do, she was stopping during contractions, forced to sit and breathe heavily, but she was determined to do it. When Aaron came back in their bedroom and saw Emily changing the sheets, he decided to take the lead.

"Ok, Em. That's enough, we're going now. I can see how much you are suffering, so we are going now."

"I'm finishing this first…"

"Em…" Aaron scolded.

"Help me then. Help me put the sheets back on the bed and we're going!" Emily exclaimed.

Aaron glanced at Emily but did as told and finished changing the sheets. He took Emily's maternity bag and helped Emily with her shoes and coat. They finally left for the hospital, and Aaron started breathing again, relieved they were finally on their way over there. It was around 7 when they finally arrived there, and Emily was immediately taken care of. She was invited to change into this terrible hospital gown she didn't want to wear, and she was quickly checked in. She was asked if she wanted the epidural, and she hesitated. She even asked Aaron, knowing very well that he wouldn't and couldn't decide for her. Last year, she had refused it in a stubborn attempt to feel the mother instinct kick in. It had been stupid from her part, it had been useless, and she was wondering if she wanted to feel all this pain again. But in the meantime, she had managed to give birth without the epidural once, she could very well do it again another time.

"Em, I'm not the one in pain. I cannot decide for you. You've already done it once without it, you know you can do it again. But they are also offering to do it without the pain… It's your choice…"

So Emily decided not to decide. She knew she would regret it during the birth, when she would be torn apart by this baby coming into the world, and that she would yell at Aaron for knocking her up a second time in a year. She was already hating him so much every single time she could feel a new contraction coming.

Aaron was pacing around, trying to calm himself. He looked at the time on his watch and decided to escape a few minutes to call relatives and friends, saying they were at the hospital and Emily was ready to give birth. He called Seth, he called his in-laws and he called his brother who already knew it thanks to their dad. He called his dad too to know how Inez was doing and if he had taken her to daycare. He then came back in the room and was greeted with a death glare from Emily. Clearly she had gone through contractions while he had been absent, and she hated him for that.

"I'm sorry babe." he said without knowing for sure. "How are you feeling?"

"Like I want to kill you!" Emily said angrily.

But it made Aaron chuckle. And she slapped his arm, angry that he would chuckle in such a desperate time for her. She was just so mad at him, it was hurting so much. He leaned toward her and kissed her temple, trying to make it up to her for abandoning her in such a time. But clearly, she wasn't in a mood. Though, she could feel that it was much faster than for Inez's birth, and everything was really starting to hurt like hell.

And things sped up quickly. Emily was checked again, and the nurse declared it was time. A look of fear passed in front of Emily's face, and she tightened her grip on Aaron's hand. She looked at him, freaking out, but now that it was the time, Aaron was the one not freaking out anymore. He was the one reassuring her. All of this was just so weird, Aaron was freaking out when he shouldn't be, and he was calm when he should freak out. But at least, he was able to reassure Emily, and that was a huge relief for her.

People started hurrying in the room and preparing everything. It wasn't the first time, but Emily felt overwhelmed. Aaron was feeling overwhelmed too. They were going to be parents again. Everything was racing in his mind, he was thinking about the names they had chosen whether it was a girl or a boy, he was thinking about Inez and how she would react to another baby arriving at home. He was thinking about his mom who wasn't there to meet this baby, he was thinking about his dad who was probably pacing around in their apartment. Why was he thinking about all of this when he should only be focused on Emily? Was he crazy? He shook his head trying to get a grip back on reality, but only Emily's nails digging in his arm made him realize she was suffering and giving birth.

It didn't take long, only a few minutes. But those few minutes had been probably the most intense in their life. And here they were, parents again. "It's a girl" they said. She was born at 11:52 a.m and screaming in the delivery room. Camila Adriana Shore was born one year and one day after Inez.


	33. The Noise

THE NOISE

Cami —short for Camila— was born 5 days ago. Aaron and Emily had brought her back home after only 24 hours in the hospital, and she had met everybody. She had met her big sister, Inez, who had looked intrigued at this tiny thing crying all the time and taking so much place in the house. The whole family had stayed longer to meet the new little soul, and even if Emily and Aaron loved having everybody around, they were kinda starting to feel overwhelmed with all of this attention. It was great having someone to take care of Inez when Cami needed so much attention, and having someone taking care of Cami when Inez needed her parents, but they just didn't really feel at home anymore. Emily had been out of the hospital 24 hours after giving birth, but she was still so tired and sore and having the house so loud and busy all the time was giving her headaches. Emily really loved her parents, and really loved Aaron's family, but she needed calm. Thank God though, Aaron had taken a few days off, and he was there to temper everybody's excitation when it was coming to Cami or Inez. She knew he wouldn't be off of work too long, he had already taken most of his paid leave for the year, and she was actually quite irritated about that. She knew he could take a few days off not paid, and he would probably, but being both crazy about their job, she knew that he couldn't stay away from work too long. To be honest, right now, she just wished she was at the White House as well. As busy as 1600 Penn was, it still felt quieter than their apartment, and she really wanted silence.

After both Cami and Inez were put down for their afternoon nap, Emily had wanted to nap too. Everybody was talking in the living room, and she walked discreetly to their bedroom, hoping to be invisible to everybody in the room. Well, of course, she knew she was not invisible to Aaron, and she felt bad for leaving him to deal with everybody, but she really hoped she was invisible to everybody else. But as she escaped in the hallway leading to the bedrooms, she was called out by her mom.

"Honey, don't you think you should get some fresh air while you can?" Sharon asked.

Emily rolled her eyes and stopped at the entrance of the hallway. She turned around to face her mom.

"Why would I need fresh air?" said bluntly.

"You haven't stepped outside in 5 days!" Sharon exclaimed.

"Yes. I know. Mainly because I gave birth to a baby 5 days ago…" Emily retorted.

"Emily, come on. It's not healthy for you to…"

"Mom!" Emily cut Sharon short. "Right now the only thing I need is a nap. So let me take that nap and then we'll talk about it. Thank you. Goodbye."

Emily didn't leave Sharon any time to answer back and left the room to run away in their bedroom. There, she fell heavily on the bed and sighed. She could still hear people talking at the other end of the apartment, but at least nobody was bothering her anymore. She closed her eyes for 5 minutes and started feeling herself drift off when in the room next to theirs, she heard a baby start crying.

"For God's sake" she exclaimed to herself.

She knew someone could and would probably run to Cami's bedroom to take care of her, but she just really didn't want anyone to dictate anything, so before anyone could do anything, so got up and went to Cami's bedroom to try and soothe her. She was so exhausted she was yawning and crying in the same time. Finally, after a few minutes, Cami calmed down and Emily brought her with her in their bedroom. She put Cami in the middle of the bed and fell fast asleep next to her within minutes.

She was woken up about an hour later by noises of pots and people talking in the kitchen. She could also hear Inez babbling with someone, probably one grandfather or her uncle. Opening her eyes, she realized that Cami was still next to her, awake but silent. And she realized Aaron was there too, sleeping. She chuckled softly, wondering what had tired him so much to end up sleeping in the middle of the afternoon. It wasn't his type. Cami started grumbling a bit.

"Shhhh, Daddy is sleeping" Emily whispered.

"I'm not…" Aaron said softly, his eyes still closed.

"So you're faking it now…" Emily asked.

Aaron opened his eyes and leaned on his side to look at Emily and Camila.

"Yeah, it's just so noisy over there. I almost wish I could be at the White House…"

"Well, you can always go if you want…" Emily said.

"No, I'm staying here with you. And our daughters."

"Talking about them, we need to take Inez back to daycare soon. She needs to keep her rhythm…" Emily explained.

"Yeah you're right. But as long as your parents are here…"

"I know, I'll have a fight with my mom. But we need to do it…"

Aaron and Emily stopped talking for a while and stayed in the bed, lying on their side, looking at Cami, this still so tiny baby in between them. A loud bang was heard, and Emily rolled her eyes.

"What the hell is she doing again?"

"I've heard something about making your favorite dessert…" Aaron explained.

"Oh my Gosh, why is she doing all that?"

"I've also heard about making diner for everybody, since Javier and Eva are leaving tomorrow"

"I wish my parents were leaving tomorrow too…"

Emily saw Aaron's expression changing. He was staring into space, blankly. And she realized what she had just said.

"Oh Aaron… I'm sorry, that's not what…"

"No it's alright, I'm alright. It's just sometimes I think my mom is still here, and then the reality just strikes."

Emily sat up and gently moved Cami a bit further away from Aaron so that she could cuddle him. She lied down on his stomach and closed her eyes as he wrapped his arms around her. He inhaled her smell and closed his eyes.

Only Cami making noises made them come back to reality. They opened their eyes again and looked at Cami who was starting to be hungry and voicy.

"We should go. I need to make her a bottle." Emily said.

"Yeah, we should. Can I give it to her though? You'll give Inez hers…"

"Already have your favorite daughter?" she teased.

"Come on ! Em ! Don't say things like that… You know it's not true!" Aaron exclaimed, mildly offended.

It made Emily laugh and she rolled on her side, falling softly on the floor, and then stood up to pick Cami from the bed. Aaron stood up too, and they walked together in the living room to see everybody. As soon as they entered the room, they were attacked by the noise and the talks and the cheers. Emily walked directly in the kitchen, trying to run away from everything, but she was stopped by her mom as soon as she wanted to make a bottle on her own.

"Let me do it" Sharon said, taking the bottle in her hand.

"Mom… I'm a grown up…" Emily scolded.

"I know. But I came here to help. So I'm helping…" Sharon answered, counting the doses.

"I thought you came here for Inez's birthday ?" Emily raised an eyebrow.

"Emily… You know what I mean…"

Emily, exasperated, walked back to the living room, asking Aaron to take Camila for a bit, and went back to the kitchen. She sat near the island with a glass of water and looked at her mom.

"Mom… I'm sorry, but you need to stop that. You know I love you, and you know I cannot thank you more for everything you've done for me, for Aaron, for Inez and Cami. But you need to let me handle my life. I can make a bottle and have Cami in my arms in the same time. I can stay 5 full days at home and stay sane. I can do things on my own."

"Honey… Why are you acting like that? You know I'm doing that for your own good…"

Sharon didn't seem to understand what Emily wanted to say, and it was irritating her so much. She could already feel the pain coming back to her head, and she really, really wanted her peace.

"Mom… You not letting me handling things is not helping me. I need to find my own rhythm, I need to organize myself." Emily tried to explain without raising her voice.

"But why would you? I'm here for you…" Sharon defended herself.

"Mom… You won't always be here. As soon as you're back to Hartford with dad, I'll have to deal on my own, because I'm on maternity leave for 12 weeks and Aaron is back to work in 10 days. So I'll have to deal on my own at one point."

"But why would you when you don't have to for now?"

Emily sighed. She didn't know how to explain that to her mom. And she heard Cami crying in the living room, so she gave up. She took the bottle back in her hands and finished preparing it, not answering her mom, and then went to the living room to give the bottle to Aaron. She sat on the couch next to her sister-in-law who was chatting with William and Peter, and she smiled, looking at Inez who was playing with Javier and the kids. She knew she was selfish, but all the noise was driving her crazy. Eva smiled at her softly, as if she knew what Emily was going through. Emily really liked Eva. She didn't know if it was because they were sharing the same in-laws, or if it was because they had been through two pregnancies both, or just because she liked her. But she really did. Eva was so discreet though, but she loved spending time just with her when she could.

A couple of hours later, Emily was feeding Inez in her high chair and people were gathering around the table, talking and laughing. It was their last meal all together, Aaron would drive Javier, Eva and the kids to the airport in the morning, while William would stay for a bit. Aaron had insisted for his dad to stay longer, almost forcing him to stay. Javier had convinced him, telling him it would be nice for him to have some fresh air away from Mexico. There was a spare bedroom in Aaron and Emily's apartment, so he knew he wouldn't bother anyone. But still, he felt like a burden, and they had had to reassure him several times before he would reschedule his flight back to Mexico. Peter and Sharon, for their part, had not bought a ticket back to Hartford, but Emily wish they had. She still had hope to talk some sense into Sharon's mind, but she knew she would probably end up asking them to leave, because stubbornness had been running in the Rhodes genes for decades. Emily had barely finished giving Inez baby food that Sharon took the lead to finish Inez's dinner with her bottle, and Emily closed her eyes, sighing deeply, trying not to snap at her mom. It was just too much. Way too much. Emily was tired.


	34. The Grandfather

THE GRANDFATHER

Emily had ended up sending her parents back home three days after Javier and Eva's departure. She had had enough of her mom after she had tried to rule her life again, and one evening, she had sat at the table, opposite her mom, and had asked for them to buy return tickets and leave soon. Saying Sharon had been upset would be an understatement, but thankfully, Peter had talked some sense into Sharon's mind, explaining that Emily and Aaron needed their time alone. It had been hard for Emily to say that, but she always had had a conflicted relation with her mom, and of course, the fact that William had stayed was not really helping Sharon understand everything. Sharon knew why William was staying longer, she could understand it, she wasn't stupid, but she could still feel a pinch of jealousy in her heart. It was annoying Emily so much, and it only made Emily want her parents to leave even earlier.

They had finally found a rhythm to settle in, and even though it was hard to have two crying babies at night, it was better now that Sharon was not around anymore. Inez had started realizing that this "thing" that was monopolizing her parents would not leave any time soon and she had started crying again at night, trying to get back all the attention Cami was getting. Aaron and Emily knew it could happen, but Inez had already cried three nights in a row, and with Aaron going back to work in two days, it was starting to be complicated to deal with. Most of all, it was hard because Inez was usually starting to cry when Cami would get her bottle, forcing the one who was not up to go take care of her. Last night, she had even ended up sleeping in Aaron and Emily's bed. They had promised each other it would never happen, but they had surrendered after a full hour of intense crying. Since William was sleeping next to Inez's room, they were also worried she would wake up her granddad. Interestingly, even being back to daycare had not helped Inez settle in to some sort of rhythm, and Emily was actually starting to think Inez should stop napping in the morning. She knew it was way too early, she was only 12 months old, but she was just really annoyed Inez would cry all night long and it was starting to be hard to cope with being up most of the night.

During those two weeks, both Emily and Aaron had turned their professional phone back on. Emily had been caught by her mom at one point, and she had been scolded for that. But she didn't care, and she was usually checking once or twice a day how things were going over there, while Aaron had started setting meetings for his first day back at work. They knew they had excellent and trustworthy deputies, but Aaron and Emily were both control freaks who couldn't keep away from work too long. Emily already knew she would set foot in the West Wing before the end of her twelve-week maternity leave, and that she would probably bring the girls along at one point.

It was a Thursday afternoon, Aaron was scheduled back to work the morning after. They had decided to all go for a walk outside along the river. They had invested in a double stroller and it was the first time they were taking the two girls outside in the same time. It was weird to have Inez sit at the front, looking around, while Cami was next to her, still so tiny and wrapped with blankets. Neither Aaron nor Emily could quite believe how their life had changed over the last year, from a newly wed very busy couple to parents of two beautiful little girls, just one year apart.

Emily was taking a call from the White House. Aaron had wanted to take it instead of her, but she had assured she was fine taking it and happy to do it. And she was, it was refreshing to be back in the real adult world, even for just a few minutes, and it was great to see that people were still calling her even if they knew she was on maternity leave. She knew she should feel otherwise, she should feel upset people are not respecting her time off, but she loved work. She truly did. So she had gone a bit further away, and was now walking behind while Aaron was pushing the stroller and chatting with his dad.

"How are you feeling?" Aaron asked, appreciating having some time alone with his dad.

"I'm fine… I'm fine Aaron." William answered.

"No, but I mean really… Dad. How are you feeling?" Aaron insisted.

"So-so. You know. It's just… Different."

"I miss her too you know…" Aaron admitted.

"I'm sure you do. I'm sure. But you have Emily, and the girls. I don't have anyone anymore…" William answered honestly.

And it hit Aaron. William didn't have anyone anymore. It wasn't true in a way, because William still had Javier and Aaron, he still had Adriana's family that was there for him. But in another way, it was true, because he had lost the love of his life, and every single day, he was alone in this big family house were he has seen everybody growing up. Javier was living only 10 minutes away, and was taking care of his dad, seeing him as often as possible, almost everyday, but Aaron was really feeling guilty. Adriana had passed away four months ago, and those past 10 days had been the first he was spending with his dad.

"If you knew how much I hate myself for being in D.C. instead of home…" Aaron said.

"Aaron, don't hate yourself for that. You live your life. That is normal. It's part of being a father too. You'll see, in 18 or 20 years, when Inez and Cami will leave the house to live their lives…" William answered.

"18 years? Please… I don't even know where Emily and I will be in 3 years after the end of Kirkman's mandate…"

"3 years is a long time too, you still have time to think about it…"

"You know dad…" Aaron changed the subject. "Javier and I talked. We think you should sell the house…"

"Sell the house? Why would I do that?"

"Because you need a new start. Away from everything that happened. You need a real bed to sleep, a new bedroom, a new house."

"But I don't want a new start. Why would I need a new start without your mom…"

"Because you don't have a choice. None of us do. And living in the past, in this house, is not healthy for you…" Aaron paused. "Why don't you come live with us in D.C?"

"Aaron…" William scolded. "I haven't lived in the U.S. in 50 years. It's not my country, it's not where I belong. And you haven't even talked to Emily about it…"

"You know Emily would agree. I know it too. And Washington is not Texas. It's different. I know you ran away because you loved Mom, and I know that your brothers and your parents were monsters to you and to Mom, but it doesn't mean that the U.S. cannot be your new home."

"I don't want to live in the U.S. Whether it's in D.C. or in Brownsville, or any other place in the U.S. I know I've always spoken English to you and Javier because I wanted to give you my roots. And I'm happy I did it, as much as I am happy that you are speaking Spanish to Inez and Cami because Mexico is your roots. But Mexico is more home to me than the U.S. has ever been. I'm not coming back."

They continued to walk and talk for a bit, and then Emily finally joined them, done with her phone call. She had no idea what they had talked about during her absence, but she could feel the mood had shifted, that it was different. She put her arm around Aaron's, who was still pushing the stroller, and they continued their walk like that, no one really talking anymore. At one point, they decided to take Inez out of the stroller, and Emily helped her walking on her own, holding her hands, being careful so that she wouldn't fall. Inez was so cute, she had been making steps on her own for only two weeks, but she still wanted to be independent. She was already pulling on her mom's hand to be freed from her grasp and it was making everybody laugh.

"Well, I guess we know who she takes after…" William said, laughing at the sight.

"You mean both her parents?" Aaron chuckled.

"What?" Emily exclaimed, shocked that Aaron could say that. "How dare you!"

"Oh, come on Em! Don't tell me you're not a wild spirit!"

They were all laughing, but deep inside, their hearts were still heavy. Aaron could see his dad looking away, a sad smile on his face. He had no doubt it felt good for William to be away from everything, but this sad look was breaking Aaron's heart. He didn't really know what to do for him, what to say. Aaron, for his part, had managed to overcome his grief, and though he was still thinking a lot about his mom and her being gone, he knew that without Emily, without Inez and Cami, without the work, he couldn't have done it. He had withdrawn a lot during those months when he had grieved. But Emily had patiently waited for him, done everything for him to get out of this hibernation. She had been the best, he had married the best woman he could ever dream of. But who was there for William? Who was actually there, every day, to help him, support him, talk to him. Aaron? No… He had not even called his dad in two months or so, not able to talk to him or to anyone who reminded him that Adriana was gone. Javier? Yes, he was, but it just wasn't the same. And Javier had had to deal with the death of his mom too. He had just never been as close to her as Aaron was, and he had always been the strongest of the two brothers. So he had always been strong for his dad, and he would always be. But being here for William was not enough, just not enough. And nobody really knew what to do or what to say. Aaron's heart was heavy at the idea of what William must have gone through in these last few months. And as they were continuing their walk, both Aaron and Emily could see William escaping, walking a bit ahead of them, alone, trying to find his own peace. Emily tightened her grip around Aaron's arm, holding onto him, keeping him close. She needed Aaron more than anything, and she couldn't imagine what it was to lose the ones you love. She was feeling so sad for William, so sad. All she could hope for was that he would one day overcome his grief.


	35. The Frustration

THE FRUSTRATION

Emily had given birth to Camila a bit more than two months ago. Having a baby and a toddler at home wasn't exactly restful, and adaptation had been a little chaotic. It had taken a good month and a little bit of sermonizing before Inez was back to sleeping all night long. Emily and Aaron had not imagined they would have to lecture a 13 month-old little girl, but they had ended up needing to be strict with Inez. It had become a habit to start crying as soon as she would wake up, and not go back to sleep unless in her mom or dad's arms. That had been very weird for them. Of course, they had scolded Inez before, mostly when she would spit or put her hand in the bowl of mashed food she was given. But they had never had to complain about Inez before, and her crises in the night had taken them by surprise. They knew it would be hard for her to adapt having a baby sister, especially since she was too young to fully understand who and why, but they had not realized how hard it would be.

In the meantime, Cami had obviously not been sleeping all through the night either. Aaron had been back to work only two weeks after Cami's birth, and the need for sleep had obviously been more real. Therefore, Emily had been the one up most of the nights, and she of course needed to take care of the girls during the day too. Emily had tried to keep a rhythm by taking Inez to daycare every morning and picking her up every night, but the lack of sleep had been very profound. William, Aaron's dad, had been the kindest. Emily refused that he would wake up at night to take care of one the girls, but he had been taking care of Camila during the afternoon when she wouldn't sleep, or had even picked up Inez from daycare some days. Though, all good things had to come to an end, and William had flown back to Mexico 5 weeks after Cami's birth. The helping hand not here anymore, Emily had been extremely irritated and exhausted the week after his departure, and she had wished more than anything to be back to work. Finally, Inez had settled down at night, and since Aaron was usually waking up around the time when Cami needed a bottle, Emily had finally been able to sleep more than two hours in a row every night.

In the end, it had taken a bit of time for Aaron and Emily to finally found a good rhythm. They had been parents full time, and had almost forgotten to be husband and wife too. They couldn't even remember when they had been to the restaurant together for the last time. They couldn't remember the last time they had had a quite night just the two of them, making out on the couch before heading to the bedroom. They couldn't remember the last time they had slept past 7 a.m. Yeah, being parents was a full time job that they loved more than the world could know, but sometimes, they felt like a break was needed.

It was a Saturday afternoon, and the day had been very slow at the White House. Therefore, Aaron had come home, his phone obviously on for any emergency. No meeting-day was a good day. It was the kind of day where he could let his deputies handle things and come home to his girls. It was weird, because a few years ago, he would have been head first into work, working like crazy even on a week-end. But things had changed, and he had realized that he could take some time off, he could hand down things to others, that some things could wait. Of course, working at the White House meant that not a lot of things could wait, and having a family in the meantime than being Chief of Staff was not that restful. But he had learned to know what was important and what wasn't, what could wait and what couldn't.

So Aaron had come home to eat lunch with Emily and the girls, and they were now laying on their bed, while Inez and Cami were napping. It was calm, everything was so calm, and having Emily in his arms was feeling really good. They were just laying there, peacefully, and for one instant, they could feel like they were back to being just lovers.

"Can you remember the last time we had such a quiet afternoon?" Aaron asked.

"Huuum. Before we got married? Something like that?" Emily chucked.

"Probably…"

Emily rose a bit to come to Aaron's height and started kissing him slowly, gently. She started straddling Aaron as the fire was starting to build in her core. Aaron put his hands on her hips, and then started sliding them down Emily's bottom. Things were heating up, and Emily's lips were slowly sliding down his neck, on his collar bone. Her hands were sliding under his polo shirt, and she was caressing his abs. They could both feel the desire build up, and Aaron was starting to take off Emily's tee-shirt. He sat up the best he could to kiss Emily's breasts, still covered by her bra. It wasn't the first time they were intimate after Cami's birth, but they had definitely not done it often in the past few months, and the need was growing with every second. Aaron's shirt was off next, and he rolled them over to be on top. He could feel the desire building in his pants. He was starting to go down on Emily, taking her sweatpants off and caressing her through the fabric of her panties when his phone started ringing.

"Not now…" Emily moaned, frustrated.

He rolled over on the side to take the phone call.

"I'll be there in ten" he said and hung up.

"You're kidding me, right?" Emily asked…

"I wish. There are updates on the shooter of Nashville, they are tracking him. I have to go…"

Aaron kissed softly Emily and exited the room, putting his shirt back on and trying to cool himself down. He took the keys of the car and promised to make it up to her soon before leaving the apartment. Emily was desperate, laying on the bed, trying to forget what had almost happened. She closed her eyes and sighed. Her sweatpants were still halfway down her legs and her tee-shirt was still God knows where on the floor. She hated being stopped in the middle of their lovemaking, she hated this so much. It had happened a few times already, Aaron and her having such crazy jobs, needing to be available 24/7, of course it had happened. And it had happened too after Inez's birth. But it seemed that since they had been back to it after Cami's birth, it had happened more than not, and it was frustrating Emily so much. She could count the numbers of times they had had sex on one hand, and the number of times they had been brought up short at least on two hands… And then, before she had time to think about it, she heard Cami waking her from her nap. She sighed and put her clothes back on before going to take care of Cami. And just as she was about to give Cami her bottle, Inez started crying in her bed, so she put Cami in her swing to go pick up Inez. But Cami started crying, frustrated to see her bottle and not being able to drink it, and so Emily ended up having to deal with two crying babies in the same time. Suddenly, the calm afternoon she had planned on spending with Aaron seemed very far away.

Aaron came back home late in the night, and Emily had already gone to bed. He was still so frustrated and added to the tiredness, he felt like shit. All he wanted was going to bed and forget about this shitty day. So he took his shoes off, went to the bathroom to brush his teeth and take a quick shower to cool off a bit. He could finally feel the tension go away, his muscles unwinding, and felt relaxed when his back finally hit the bed. Emily turned around in an instinctive movement, ending up curled-up against him.

"What time is it?" she asked, still half-asleep.

"2 a.m." he answered.

Emily slowly opened her eyes and placed a soft kiss of her husband's cheek. Her mind started racing pretty quickly, and she put her hand on his crotch. Aaron chuckled.

"You serious? You're still half asleep…" Aaron said, softly laughing.

"I'm mostly still needy from this afternoon…" Emily answered, her legs interweaving with his. "Aren't you?"

"You know I always need little convincing from you…" he laughed and started kissing her.

Emily climbed on top of him and started kissing every inch of his body. It didn't take long before Aaron's body started to react, and even though they were both tired, they could feel the desire coming to them very quickly. Aaron took off Emily's nightgown and started kissing her bare chest, his hands roaming on her breasts, playing with them. She tugged on his tee-shirt and he rose a bit to help her taking it off. Emily went further down, her lips tracing a line from his collar bone to the elastic band of his underwear. She quickly grabbed his sweatpants and underwear in the meantime, freeing his already full of need member. She took him in her mouth, taking Aaron by surprise. Her rhythm fastening, listening to Aaron's moans, she was sucking and licking. It felt so good for Aaron, and Emily could feel the desire build in her core, ready to make one with him. Aaron stopped her quickly, not able to take it anymore, and he helped her to take off her panties before she could sink on him. But just as they were starting to move together, they started hearing cries in the room next to them.

"You have to be fucking kidding me…" Emily said angrily.

She rolled over on the side of the bed, leaving both Aaron and her unfinished.

"Even in the middle of the night! Can't we have sex in this house anymore?" she exclaimed.

"Can't we just let her cry?" Aaron tried.

"You know she's gonna wake up her sister…"

They were both extremely frustrated. Being cut off in their lovemaking for the second time of the day was just too much.

"You should probably finish yourself off, cause the odds are definitely not in our favor…" Emily said, pissed.

She stood up, put her nightgown back on quickly and walked to Cami's bedroom to take care of her before she could wake up Inez. For Aaron, the thought of finishing himself off was worse than anything. Of course it had happened, and Emily and him didn't have any issue regarding their needs, both his and hers, but needing to finish himself off was very frustrating, especially when his wife was next door taking care of their daughter.

Emily came back to bed almost an hour later after feeding Camila and putting her back to bed. Aaron was still not sleeping, and he extended his arm for Emily to cuddle against him.

"This is never happening again…" Emily said.

"What? Us having sex?" Aaron chuckled.

"Please, don't pronounce that word until we actually can. I can't take it anymore. Is this really what having two kids look like? Not being able to have time for ourselves anymore?"

"I guess once the girls are both sleeping through the night, it will be easier…"

"So, we have to resolve to do it only at night? No more impromptu sex on the couch in the middle of the afternoon? No more sex anywhere in the apartment anytime of the day?" Emily complained.

"Well, at least they are still young enough not to understand what is happening in their parents' bedroom. Imagine when they'll be old enough to understand and walk into the room at any time…" Aaron explained.

Emily moaned in frustration and decided to close her eyes. Kids were going to be the death of them as a couple. They knew it. They both ended up falling asleep for the little time they had left before the girls would wake up and start another hectic day of parents.


	36. The Work

THE WORK

This was it. Emily was officially back to work on that day. It was the first time they would leave both girls at daycare, and it was freaking them out. Of course, it wasn't really true, Inez had been at daycare for a year, and they had taken Cami for an adaptation the week before, but it felt like the first time. It was the first time both girls would spend the whole day at daycare, and that they would be busy at work. Surprisingly, Aaron seemed more stressed than Emily, but maybe it was because Emily was glad to be back to a normal rhythm. She was really glad to go back to work. She had wanted to do it like she had done with Inez, and start taking calls and follow a bit what was happening at the White House while still being on maternity leave, but Emily had ended up being much busier with two kids than with one, and she had completely abandoned the possibility of working at home.

So when at 8 a.m, she walked into her office, she sighed.

"Dear office, if you knew how much I missed you…" she said out loud.

Aaron, who was walking just behind her, laughed.

"That much?" he asked.

"You have no idea. I know I sound like a bitch for saying that, I know I am a terrible mother, but it feels so good to be back to work…"

"Stop saying stupid things… You're not a bad mother for saying that." Aaron scolded.

"Whatever, let's just go back to work!" Emily exclaimed.

Emily sat at her desk and sighed again, happy to be here. She spent the morning being filled on the latest by Aaron and their deputies, and then she started taking calls again, and planning meetings. She met with the President during the day, who welcomed her back, and she chatted a little. She met Alex too and took the time to eat lunch with her, just like the good old times when she was working for Kirkman at HUD. Aaron had sighed, he had been hoping he would have the privilege of Emily's first lunch back at work, but he had ended up eating with Seth and Kendra, as he often did when Emily was not there.

"Woah, you didn't even ditch us for Emily's first day back at work?" Seth chucked when he saw Aaron sitting in the cafeteria next to them.

"I thought we were your spare wheel!" Kendra added.

"Can you be my spare wheel for one more day?" Aaron asked, chuckling.

"What happened? Is she already that busy?" Kendra continued.

"She ditched me for the First Lady…" Aaron explained, irritated.

Seth and Kendra laughed, and Lyor joined them along a few other colleagues.

"What are you laughing about?" he asked, sitting with them.

"Aaron got ditched for the First Lady…" Seth explained, still laughing.

"Ha… Well, now you can understand what it feels like to be the spare wheel…" Lyor answered with his usual sarcastic tone.

It had been a recurring joke for years. Everybody knew that Aaron and Emily were always having lunch together when they could, and they didn't see them often at the cafeteria for lunch. It had already been a joke during Emily's first maternity leave and seeing Aaron back to eating with them had been a source for multiple teasing. Aaron didn't mind though, he knew it, he knew he was using them as a spare wheel, everybody knew it and everybody was fine with it. It was just the way it was.

A few hours later, Emily and Aaron were back to their own office. Emily was running here and there, doing this and that. She was just so motivated, so happy, so full of enthusiasm. Aaron could feel she was happy to be back, that she needed that. It had been a while since he had seen such an enthusiasm in her, such a smile. Having two daughters that close in age had definitely worn her out. Sometimes he was feeling bad for her, because he knew that he should have been home more often to help her out, to be the dad he was supposed to be. But work had been crazy the past few weeks, and he even had ended up going to work on Sundays, sometimes coming home in the middle of the night. He knew that now Emily was back to work, it would be less crazy and he would finally be able to take care of the girls, but he also knew that it meant Emily would be the one taking the workload. It was just the way it was. Starting a family and having such crazy jobs in the meantime were two incompatible things, but they had ended up doing it anyway. So here they were, having to manage the unmanageable, and he knew it would be hard for the next three years too. Tom Kirkman had been a real savior though when he had offered Aaron the job of co-chief of staff. It had been a huge relief to be able to share the workload with Emily.

"Em… It's five. Do you want to pick up the girls or do you want me to go?" he asked, knocking at her door.

Emily was writing some things and didn't even bother raising her head to answer…

"Hum. Can you go? I still have so many things to do…"

"Need some help? I still have an hour before daycare closes…" he offered.

"No I'm fine, I'm ok. I don't know when I'll come home but I'm fine."

Aaron didn't answer and leaned on the door frame, looking at Emily, still deep in her work. He smiled slightly, she was just focused on her papers she didn't even notice Aaron had stayed there, staring at her. But then, Aaron's personal phone rang, and it was weird because he had set the "do not disturb" mode, so only very specific people could call him. The phone stopped ringing before he could find it under a stack of paper, and he discovered that daycare had called. It had never happened before, and he started worrying.

"Em, can you check your personal phone. Has daycare called you?" he asked, coming back to her office.

She didn't even react, too deep in her papers.

"Emily… Hello… Em!" he called a bit louder.

"What? Sorry…" she answered, realizing Aaron was still there.

"Has daycare called you? I missed their call but they just did. Were they supposed to call for anything?" he asked again.

"I don't think so, but let me check." she rummaged through her purse. "Yeah… They called too… 3 minutes ago…"

"Ok, I'm calling back." Aaron said.

He walked back to his office to let Emily work, but now she was worried. So she stood up and waited on the doorway between their offices to know what was going on. Apparently something was going on with Inez, but she couldn't clearly understand what and she was waiting impatiently, tapping her foot on the floor. She could see Aaron frown, which meant something had happened, and she didn't like that.

"What is going on?" she asked even before he had time to hung up the phone.

"Inez fell, or she was pushed by another kid, I don't know. But whatever, she knocked her head against a table and her eyebrow arch is bleeding… They say it's probably nothing too important, but they are worried she needs stitches."

"What? Oh my gosh! How did that happen?" she exclaimed, worried and angry at the same time.

"I don't know. But I need to pick her up to take her to the hospital." he said.

"We need to change daycare. This cannot happen again." Emily said sharply, annoyed.

"Em… It could have happened at home too… It just happens…" Aaron answered, trying to calm down his wife.

"Well, let's go then. I'll come with you. You cannot deal with Inez and Cami at the hospital…" Emily started saying.

But just at that time, her professional phone started ringing, and she was called down to command ops.

"Damnit. Crisis after crisis…" she murmured

"Go… Don't worry, I can deal the two of them. Even at the hospital…"

"But… What if…"

"Go down to the command ops. I'll be fine. I promise… And we don't have the choice anyway. Go…"

"You sure?"

"Yes. Kiss me goodbye and go."

Emily did as told but couldn't help worrying. Her mind was not on the case when she was going down to the PEOC, and she was just really hoping to be back home soon. Unfortunately, as soon as she was updated on the case, she understood that her first day back at work wouldn't be short. She was okay with that, she had needed some kind of action, but knowing that Aaron was on his way to the hospital with the girls was freaking her out. She was frustrated not to be able to console Inez and be with Aaron to take care of her. She was worried that Aaron wouldn't handle both girls at the hospital. As the meeting was continuing in the command ops, her mind was wandering elsewhere, even if she knew she needed to be concentrated on what was happening on the screens right now.

Aaron was worried too. When he arrived at daycare, Inez was still crying and had a band aid on her head and he could see the blood starting to run down her temple because the band aid was not thick enough. The vision made him freak out and he ran to hug his baby girl who finally started to calm down when his dad hugged her tight. He soon picked up Cami too, and he left for the hospital with Inez desperate for more attention and Cami crying because her sister was crying. He really needed to calm Inez down to be able to calm Cami down, and he wasn't sure how he would do it. Fortunately, he was strong enough to carry Cami in her baby car seat and have Inez in his other arm, so it didn't take long for Inez to go back to her normal self after she was out of the car. Cami started crying again at one point too, and it took him all the courage in the world not to freak out at the idea to put Inez down for a few seconds to take Cami out of her car seat. He had been in the waiting area for about half an hour, and he was already starting to be annoyed at the time it was taking for them to be taken care of. He just needed Inez to be checked, and he really wanted to be home soon so that they could all be in peace. Cami was whimpering from time to time, and he was pacing around the room with both girls in his arms. He walked back to the front desk twice, asking when it would be time for them to be taken care of, but there was always an emergency before them. He got it, he could understand that more important things had happened than a baby hurting her head, but it was just irritating him that he had to wait that long. Plus, he could see time flying, and he knew Cami would need her bottle very soon, and he really didn't want to deal with that in the middle of a waiting room. Fortunately, it took only another fifteen minutes before someone called him, and after Inez was checked and the doctor made sure she didn't have any kind of concussion, he put some surgical glue on her injury. She cried some more as it was hard to hold her in place when the doctor tried to touch her, but he finally made it after she was sat on Aaron's lap.

In the end, they came home a little bit after 7 p.m. As planned, Cami had started being hungry, and she had cried all the way back home, which had of course made Inez cry. Aaron loved his daughters very dearly, but having them cry for fifteen minutes at the back of the car was making his head pound. As he had imagined, Emily was not back home yet, and he ran in the kitchen to prepare Cami's bottle and Inez's dinner. He didn't even take the time to take off his shoes and started giving them food right away, a spoon in one hand for Inez's baby food, holding Cami and giving her the bottle in the other. Suddenly, he could understand why Emily had been so happy to come back to work in the morning, and he realized how much of a challenge all of that would be for the next few of years.

Emily managed to come home a little bit after midnight, relieved after seeing Aaron's text saying everything was okay, but frustrated that she had not been able to help him out. She walked to Inez's bedroom to check on her, and was sad to see her bruised face even in the dark of the room. It made her heart break and she almost let a tear fall on her cheek to know how much her baby girl must have suffered. Aaron was already sleeping, and she was ready to do the same when she heard Cami starting to cry. She chuckled, wondering when her day would end, and as she walked to her room with a bottle, she realized that no matter how hard this could be, she wouldn't trade it for the world.


	37. The Date

This is a Valentine's day chapter, so a part of it is **rated M**. You are warned ;)

* * *

THE DATE

 _"Hey Nadia, any plans for Valentine's day?" Aaron asked as his cousin picked up the phone._

 _"Hello to you too, dear cousin. You do remember you have a wife, right?" Nadia chuckled._

 _"That's exactly the reason why I'm calling you…" he said._

 _"Let me see… You want me to be Inez and Cami's Galentine?" she asked, understanding where this was going._

 _"Something like that, yeah…"_

 _"Lucky you, I just broke things off with this guy working at the Capitol. So I would very much like a little distraction from people of your kind…"_

 _"Hey… Not all men are like this guy. I'm not!" Aaron exclaimed. "Who was the guy anyway?"_

 _"Some douche working for Hookstraten…"_

 _"Dating a Republican? What were you thinking anyway…"_

 _"Hey… I never said anything when you hooked up with that girl… What was her name again? Mandy?"_

 _"Please, don't remind me of that…" he frowned. "So, feel like having a date with Inez and Cami on Valentine's day?"_

 _"You know I'd do anything for my favorite cousin…"_

 _Aaron grinned, he loved hearing Nadia saying he was the favorite cousin. He knew she was saying that to all the cousins, but he loved it anyway. Nadia was really the best. He always wondered why he was so close to her, but she was his only family in Washington, and it truly felt good to have someone from his roots geographically close to him. Sometimes, she felt more like a sister than a cousin, and he couldn't be more grateful that she was always there for him and Emily._

 _"So, can you come over to take care of them next Friday?" he asked._

 _"What? Coming over? Naaah. Bring them to me. Have the full night for yourselves…" she exclaimed._

 _"You sure? Handling the girls and everything for the whole night?"_

 _"Yeah, yeah. I'll be fine. Remember something though : YOU. OWE. ME."_

And so here they were, on Valentine's day. Aaron and Emily had brought Inez and Cami to Nadia's a few minutes before, and were now on their way to the restaurant. They were wearing their best outfit for the night and wanted all of this to be special. Celebrating Valentine's day wasn't really their thing, but they also knew that they needed some time for themselves more than anything. Luckily, the girls had slept pretty well the past two nights, and they were starting to see the end of the tunnel. Though, their parental instincts were very high tonight, as it was their first real night away from both the girls.

"I know we said it is our night, but I'm really worried…" Emily said as they were parking not far from the restaurant.

"I know. Don't think I'm not. But Nadia said she would call if she needed help, so let's just keep that in mind and decide to just be us tonight. Husband and wife. Not parents. Okay?" Aaron answered and kissed her softly.

"Yeah. You're right." Emily smiled and excited the car.

She didn't know where they were going, she just knew Aaron had reserved a table in one of the nice restaurants of D.C. and they walked hand in hand toward it. It felt good to go out. They knew, as always, that they could be bothered by work, but they had decided not to think about it. For once, it was their night, and nothing would ruin it. Aaron stopped just in front of the restaurant and looked at Emily with a grin.

"You got us a table here?" Emily asked, surprised.

"Absolutely…" Aaron answered.

"Did you use your Chief of Staff title to get us in or what?"

Aaron chuckled and opened the door to invite her to come in.

"No, I recently learned that a guy who was in college with me works here…"

"Hum, I see. You pulled a few strings to get us in then…"

"Complaining?"

"Not at all…"

They were quickly welcomed and asked a name for the reservation. They were then invited to follow the waiter further at the back of the restaurant, and they sat in one of the private booths of the restaurant. It was really nice to be away from the other couples, and Emily was very grateful for Aaron's college friend. Looking at the room, she chuckled at the sight of all the couples in the restaurant. Of course, it was the ultimate day for all the lovers, and she knew they were one of these couples too, but she couldn't help thinking how schmaltzy all of this was.

"I can't believe we waited all these years to actually celebrate Valentine's day…" Emily started.

"Well, let's just say that having two daughters made us realize how the little things could also be essential" Aaron said, taking Emily's hand in his across the table.

"Do you think Nadia's okay?" Emily asked.

"Em… What did we say?" Aaron scolded gently.

"Okay yeah, you're right I'm sorry… Though, we owe her big time for having the girls at her place all night long" she smiled.

"She's already planning her revenge, don't worry."

Having the place just for themselves was something she had dreamt about in a good while. She knew it would be weird to come home and have no one around, but it also meant they would be able to do whatever they wanted, wherever they wanted, and Emily already had a few ideas in the back of her mind. She discreetly took her heel off and started running her foot along Aaron's leg, going a bit further up his thigh.

"Emily!" Aaron groaned, surprised.

"I really hope the service won't take long tonight…" Emily said with a cocky grin.

Aaron gulped hard at the feeling of Emily's foot coming nearer his groin, and he sat up a bit, trying to keep composure. That would be a long night, a very long night. He could feel the tension build in his pants and breathed heavily, trying to calm himself down.

"Em… Please…"

"Already begging?" she chuckled.

"You know the effect you have on me… I'm not feeling super comfortable being turned on in the middle of the nicest restaurant in town…"

"Why are you such a mood killer…" Emily grumbled.

"I promise I won't be a mood killer at all as soon as we leave this restaurant…" Aaron grinned.

Emily lowered her foot and put her shoe back on for Aaron's greatest relief. Though, Emily's cocky grin didn't leave her face for the whole evening, and they were both starting to find the dinner very long. It was great, everything was great. It was probably one of the best restaurants they had ever been to, but they were really starting to feel the need to go back home as quickly as possible. Emily's little game started again a couple more times during the dinner, and every time Aaron could feel himself about to take her right here, right now. Neither of them knew why they were so turned on, whether it was the idea to be alone for the whole night, or because it was a special day, but they both could feel like horny teenagers, not able to behave in public. It took them all the strength in the world not to leave the restaurant earlier than planned and go straight home.

And, after spending what seemed to be an eternity in that restaurant, desperate to finish it sooner rather than later, they finally left the restaurant. The drive home also lasted what seemed to be an eternity, and the door of their apartment barely closed, they were already starting to undress each other. Kissing eagerly, they were walking to the couch, and as Emily's legs bumped into it, they both fell on it, Aaron on top of Emily.

"I feel like a teenager again" Emily said in a breath.

Aaron chuckled and continued to undress Emily, unzipping her dress and taking it down the best he could with her laying on the couch. Finally getting rid of this dress, Emily started unbuckling Aaron's belt and unzipping his pants to push them down his legs.

"Please, no foreplay, I just really want you right now…" Aaron murmured, his breathing already short.

"Just shut up Aaron" Emily commanded, already dripping from want.

Emily slid Aaron's underwear down his legs and then pushed him back so that he would sit on the couch. She decided to take the lead and took her panties off and quickly straddled Aaron, going down on him slowly. They both moaned at the sensation of being perfectly interlocked together, and Emily started moving. Her surrounding him was always the best thing ever, even after all these years. She took off his shirt in the meantime, helped by Aaron who had unbuttoned it earlier, and Aaron's hands started roaming on her back, on her ass, helping her with the rhythm. His lips were on her lips, on her neck, on her collarbone, on her shoulder. He couldn't help but kiss all these spots he knew were driving her crazy. The fire was obvious between them, the desire and need growing with every second. He ended up finally unclasping her bra, but before he could caress her breasts, Emily took his hand in hers and invited him to play with her clit. He did so as Emily put her hands on his shoulders, to help with the rhythm, faster with every thrust. They quickly reached their orgasm and screamed in ecstasies. Still making one, Emily fell on Aaron, putting her arms around him and catching her breath. Holding each other tight, they stayed there for a bit before Aaron broke the silence.

"This is not how I had imagined our very romantic evening…" he laughed.

"Who said the evening was over?" Emily exclaimed.

"As much as you feel like a teenager tonight, you know… we're not anymore, I'm gonna need some time to recover from this…" Aaron teased.

Emily finally moved from Aaron and sat on the couch, right next to him, and closed her eyes, trying to get back to a normal breathing.

"Should we move to the bedroom?"

"Yeah, I'm bringing the champagne…" Aaron answered

They both started moving and put their underwear back on, as Emily walked to the bathroom to quickly clean herself and Aaron walked to the kitchen to take the bottle of champagne out of the fridge. He took two glasses of champagne out of the cupboard and brought everything in the bedroom. The subdued light was making a very romantic atmosphere in the room and as he was ready to lie on the bed, he heard his phone ringing. He went back to the living room to pick it up. Nadia had just sent a picture of the girls.

 _"Peacefully sleeping. No need to worry, but please, don't take the advantage to conceive #3, I'm not taking care of three children next year for Valentine's day. Two is enough."_

Aaron laughed at the message and showed it to Emily as she was just walking out of the bathroom. Emily put her arms around his abdomen, her head resting on his back.

"It's not because we are not conceiving that we cannot practice, right?" she chuckled.

"Absolutely…" Aaron answered.

"Do we have whipped cream in the fridge?" she asked.

It made Aaron laugh and he turned around to wrap his arms around her.

"Wasn't the chocolate fondant of the restaurant enough?" he chuckled.

"It's never enough when I can have my favorite dessert all night long…"

"What are you planning with me?" Aaron asked.

"All sorts of things…" Emily teased.

She released her embrace around him and walked toward the fridge to look for what she wanted, while Aaron was starting to pick up the clothes they had left on the floor.

"Whipped cream it is!" Emily exclaimed. "We have strawberries too…" she offered.

"Isn't that a bit cliché?" Aaron joked.

"Do you have a problem with clichés?" Emily teased

"Not at all…"

Emily took the bowl of strawberries and the whipped cream and walked to the bedroom, passing in front of Aaron with a knowing look. Aaron smiled and shook his head, happy to follow her. Arriving in the bedroom, Emily was already waiting for him, sitting on the bed.

"So, do you want to eat dessert first or should I?" she asked playfully.

Aaron put aside the clothes he had picked up earlier and walked quickly to Emily, pushing her to lie on the bed.

"My turn…"

The night would be long, very long.


	38. The Weekend

THE WEEK-END

"Aaron, where did you put Cami's pacifier ?" Emily asked from the bedroom.

It was a Friday evening. Aaron and Emily had just arrived with the girls in Chesapeake Beach, where they had decided to spend the next two days. It was supposed to be a beautiful week-end in Maryland, and they desperately needed those days to get away from Washington. They had rented a beach house, and had driven the good hour that it was taking to go over there. April was just around the corner, and they were excited for the nice days to come. Cami was about to turn 6 months, and it was crazy how fast she could grow up. Of course, they had seen the time fly by with Inez too, but they just couldn't believe it: Their youngest was already 6 months old. Cami had started eating baby food and was finally sleeping all through the night. She was grabbing things and smiling, laughing with her big sister and her parents. Inez had adapted to Cami, and now that she was walking here and there being such a grown up, she was also taking care of her little sister. Every single time Cami would make a toy fall on the floor or out of reach, Inez would pick it up and give it back to Cami. It was making Aaron and Emily's hearts melt all the time.

Since both girls were sleeping all through the night, it was much easier for Aaron and Emily to enjoy spending time with the girls. They were not both exhausted all the time, and even if work was crazy, it was feeling good to go back home every night to two little smily girls. As much as they could, they were both trying to be there every night to put the girls to bed. Unfortunately, it wasn't happening as often as they wanted to, Aaron or Emily being often stuck at work after bedtime. They were also trying to take turns in picking up the girls from daycare, but depending on the situation at the White House, it wasn't that easy to do.

"Isn't it in her diaper bag?" Aaron asked, walking in the bedroom with Inez in his arms.

"I can't find it, Cami's grumpy…" his wife answered, desperate.

Emily had Cami in her arms, trying to soothe her while finding the pacifier, but she was just rummaging through the bag, starting to worry they had forgotten it.

"Ok, slow down Em. I'm going to look for it."

Emily breathed and sat on the edge of the bed, exhausted. Cami had started crying, and she didn't know if she could handle it tonight. She had been called at the White House at four in the morning, and though they had prepared everything in advance for the week-end, it was always crazy to go away with two babies for a couple of days. In the end, they had left Washington later than expected, and the girls had ended up sleeping in the car, but had been woken up shortly after falling asleep when they had arrived in Chesapeake Beach. Hence, Cami was grumpy, because she could feel her mom was getting her ready for bed, and she didn't like it at all, even though she was still exhausted.

"Ok, let me check somewhere else" Aaron said.

He put Inez down on the floor, letting her do her things and play on her own for a few minutes while he was looking for Camila's pacifier. But truth be told, he had no clue where it could be. He was sure he had put it in her diaper bag, but he couldn't find it anymore, and he was starting to wonder what he had done with it. Walking out of the room, he even went back to the car to check if it had not fallen on the floor, and also looked in their suitcase. He could hear Cami's cries from the other room, and he was starting to be annoyed, he didn't like not finding things. Also, he wanted a restful week-end, and not having Cami's pacifier would definitely kill it. But then, suddenly it rang a bell. He walked to Inez's diaper bag and found the pacifier.

"Was in the wrong diaper bag…" Aaron said, walking back to the bedroom.

"Oh, thank God." Emily exclaimed, taking the pacifier and putting it in Cami's mouth.

"Cami… cry" Inez exclaimed, still sitting on the floor and looking at her parents.

"Yeah, you're right baby girl. Cami's crying. Because she needs her pacifier…"

"Cami… sleep." Inez exclaimed again.

"Yes, she will go to bed. And you too, you need to go to bed too…" Aaron said, picking the girl up from the floor.

"No! No! No!" Inez shook her head furiously and started whining.

Definitely, they had not planned the week-end to start like that. It took them a good thirty minutes to settle down both girls and then another half hour to organize and unpack most of the things they needed. Going away with two babies was like moving somewhere far away, the car was full, and it felt crazy to be able to bring so many things for just two nights. Stroller, folding cribs, diaper bags, toys, clothes… And so many more essential things for two babies.

They ended up ordering food not before nine in the evening, and sat down on the couch in front of the fireplace eating their dinner.

"So, what do you want to do tomorrow?" Aaron asked.

"Go for a walk, go to the farmer's market, cook, play with the girls, sit on the beach, close my eyes, forget about the White House." Emily answered, resting her head on her husband's shoulder.

"That sounds doable. Well, maybe not everything, but we have two days, so all of it seems doable at one point or another during the week-end." he said, kissing her forehead.

"Can I add one more thing to the list?" she asked.

"Of course!"

"Make love to you?"

Aaron chuckled.

"So, we're back at it again? We need to plan when we have sex now?" he asked, still chuckling.

Emily hit his shoulder gently, annoyed he was making fun of her. But truth be told, she was really frustrated with this situation, and sometimes she wondered if she shouldn't just put the girls up for adoption, give up her job at the White House and run away with Aaron, somewhere far where nobody could ever bother them again.

"Let's just go to bed for now, you look exhausted, and we'll see tomorrow about your last request, sounds good?" Aaron asked, standing up from the couch and offering his hand to Emily, inviting her to follow.

"Sleeping before 11:00 p.m. always sounds good to me" Emily answered, yawning.

In the end, Emily and Aaron slept for a good 8 hours before being woken up by Cami's hungry cries, and though it wasn't much for sleep-deprived parents, it was much better than what they had been used to in the past few months. They woke up almost refreshed and energized, which had not happened since Camila's birth.

The day went by slowly. Aaron prepared breakfast while Emily was feeding the girls, and they ended up taking a walk to the farmer's market to buy things for lunch. Cami was sleeping in the stroller, but Inez was wide awake, eager to get out of it and walk by herself. Aaron gave in after ten minutes of Inez tapping her feet against the stroller and took her out of it. She started wandering around, running here and there and hiding behind the stalls, stumbling when she would walk too fast. Constantly checking on her, Aaron wasn't feeling really reassured. It wasn't Washington, there were not many people around them, but he was still worried she would run too far or fall on something and hurt herself. She had been walking for six months, but it was still amazing him to see her growing up so fast. In the meantime, Emily was buying vegetables, imagining recipes for the rest of the week-end, happy to be able to relax for the next two days. She had found a passion in cooking after starting to work at the White House. Whenever she could, she loved cooking, she felt like it was relaxing her after a terrible day at work. For the week-end, they had given strict orders to their deputies not to call them unless an emergency was coming up, and even if they knew it could happen, they had hope that they wouldn't be bothered. It was quite unconventional to do it, they knew they had started delegating much more than they should, but they didn't even care anymore, it was their way to stay sane and healthy.

In the afternoon, after both girls had napped, they decided to go the beach. It was a sunny day, the sky was blue, the temperature was just below the seventies, and no wind could be felt. Inez was bare-foot, discovering the sand and curious about this new sensation under her feet. Last time she had seen the sand, she wasn't yet walking, and truth be told, she probably couldn't really remember it. Suddenly, she fell, which was not that surprising considering she was mostly stumbling, and started taping her hands on it. Obviously intrigued, she started taking sand in her hands, and decided to put some in her mouth. Attentive, Aaron caught her just before she could open her mouth.

"Inez, don't!" he started, forcing her to open her hand.

Inez started grumbling, disappointed her dad wouldn't let her taste the sand. But before she could pout some more, Aaron took her in his arms.

"I'm taking her by the water" Aaron said to Emily, who was playing with Cami, sat on the towel.

"Go slow, don't freak her out!" Emily called as he was already walking over there.

Emily was happy, she was smiling, and she was enjoying the week-end.

"So, what do you think Cami, do you like the beach? Yeah I know, it's not as warm as Mexico, but we'll take you there one day." Emily started talking to her daughter.

"Do you want me to take you by the water too?" she continued. "Okay, let's try this then."

Emily took off her shoes and stood up, rolling up her jeans to avoid them to get wet. She took Cami in her arms and started walking toward Aaron and Inez, who wasn't feeling as confident as before. She could see that Inez was curious, but having the waves hitting her feet wasn't really reassuring her, and she laughed at the view. Arriving near them, she squatted down, Cami on her lap, and started lowering her in the water. As soon as her bare feet touched the water, she started crying loudly, just like she would often do when it was time to take a bath. This made both Aaron and Emily laugh out loud, and Emily rose up immediately to soothe Cami. Her cries made Inez look up toward her sister.

"Cami, cry" she said.

Inez was talking more and more. She wasn't yet making sentences, she was indeed too young for that, but she had learned her sister's name, and she was putting words one behind the other to try and express what she wanted. "gry" for hungry, and "play" were her favorites words for now, as well as "cry" every time Cami would make a noise, even if it was just a little grunt or a laugh.

"She's actually probably hungry…" Emily said

"Gry?" Inez asked.

"Are you hungry too Inez?" Emily asked her eldest.

"No"

Even to say yes, Inez was constantly saying no. It had started a few weeks ago, and since then, neither Aaron or Emily had heard her saying yes again. Good thing Aaron and Emily were good parents, otherwise Inez would probably have already died of sleep-deprivation or hunger.

"Maybe we should just go, don't you think?" Aaron wondered out loud.

"Yeah, it's going to take a little bit to back to the house, that's probably a good idea." Emily answered.

"Let's go" Aaron said, raising Inez in his arms.

Inez waved her hand toward the water, and happily said goodbye. Aaron and Emily both laughed, looking at their eldest, and looked at each other, knowing they would be back sooner rather than later.


	39. The Shock

THE SHOCK

It was a Tuesday afternoon, Emily and Aaron were at work. Everything seemed fine, but it was a special and complicated day. It was the one-year anniversary of Adriana's death. Emily was very aware of that, and was constantly checking on Aaron, on any kind of suspicious behavior. She knew he would break down at one point, of course he would, and the major thing that was making her say that was Aaron's commitment to work on that day. While he would usually share the workload, he had taken it all when he had arrived at the office in the morning. Emily barely had anything to do, and it was starting to worry her.

William had spent the last ten days with them in Washington, but had left the previous day to go back to Mexico. Aaron didn't like that at all, but he didn't really have a choice. He had already negotiated for a while before persuading his dad to come to D.C., so he had given in when his dad had said he wanted to be in Mexico for Adriana's death anniversary. To be honest, he could understand why William wanted so much to be in Mexico on that day, and part of Aaron wanted to be there too. He had not been to Mexico in one year, even though he knew he should have, but he just couldn't. Because it meant staying at his dad's, the childhood home where he had seen his mother dying, and it was just inconceivable for him to spend one minute there. He was putting a brave face on it, but deep inside, he wasn't that strong, and definitely not strong enough to set foot there.

Even though he was working hard today, his mind couldn't help but race: thinking about how his dad was, remembering that terrible day as if it was yesterday. He had tried to call his dad during a short lunch break, but had not managed to reach him, his dad probably somewhere he didn't want to be bothered.

Emily not having much more to do, was just taking calls and organizing stuff, while Aaron had gone down to the command ops with the President, as he had recently been going way too often. For whatever reason, the world had been crazy these past few weeks, and there was rarely one day without a crisis requiring one of them to go down to the PEOC. Knowing what was happening, she had the hope it wouldn't last too long, and she was just drinking coffee while waiting for the latest update. She had already heard Aaron's personal phone ringing twice when her own personal phone started ringing. Usually, when both Aaron and her phone were ringing in a short time, it was daycare, and she answered without even checking who it was.

"Oh… Hey. Hi Javier. I'm sorry I thought it was daycare." she answered when she recognized the voice.

Instantly, she could tell something was wrong. Javier was speaking English fluently, but he suddenly couldn't find his words anymore. She could hear him sniffing over the phone, and the sobs in his voice were obvious.

"I'm sorry, Aaron is in command ops, he can't answer."

So Javier decided to tell Emily everything.

"He what?" was all Emily could say.

Javier repeated what he had just said, but she had very well understood. Shock was an understatement, she started crying, her heart beating rapidly, her mind racing, and she felt her legs giving out. It couldn't be real, but it was. She was shaken and didn't know what to say or how to react.

"We'll be down there as soon as we can"

And then she hung up. It took her some time to react and start thinking again. Putting their deputies in charge of everything. Buying tickets. Picking up the girls from daycare. Packing. And worst of all: announcing everything to Aaron. She didn't know how to handle it. Just thinking about it was making her sweat. She already knew Aaron would be broken, and it was awful, because all she wanted to do was run down to the PEOC and take him out of it, but she knew she couldn't.

So instead, she ran to their deputies' office, gave them the latest information and made sure they would be able to handle it for the next few days. It was hard to organize everything in such a short time, and she was giving orders to everyone, bossing people around. It wasn't her type, she wasn't acting like herself and she knew it, but she couldn't help herself.

"From now on and as soon as you see Aaron back from command ops, you're in charge" she said. "If ever there is a problem, call me, not Aaron."

She walked back to her office, and started browsing the internet, looking for the soonest flight possible. But it was tricky, because she wasn't sure when they would be ready, she still had to pick up the girls, pack, and she didn't even know when Aaron would come back from command ops. She felt overwhelmed by what was happening, but she knew she needed to be strong for Aaron, she couldn't fail him, and she had no excuse, she was not pregnant, hormones were not making her crazy. Trying to organize her thoughts, she started making a mental list of things she still had to do. And then, her eyes went back to the screen, and she realized she still had not bought those tickets. But it was already 4 p.m, and she couldn't find any flight leaving in the evening. The last flight for Mexico was leaving an hour later, and there was no way they could be there in time. Trying to consider her options, she decided they would leave first thing in the morning, and bought the tickets quickly before letting her mind race again, thinking about the way she should handle things with Aaron. But before she could decide, she heard him entering his office, and she knew the worst was to come.

She walked to his office and closed the door between their two offices, isolating them from everything.

"Hey…" he started.

"Hon'… You should sit." she cut him off.

Emily's heart was racing, she didn't know how to say that, how to do that, she could already feel the tremors in her voice. Aaron noticed and understood something was going on, so he did as told, and sat on the couch of his office. Emily walked next to him and sat, putting one hand on his leg, the other one holding his hands.

"Em, what is going on, are you okay ?" he asked.

"It's… Javier called." she started. "Several times. And he ended up calling me." she was slow, trying to weigh her words before anything could come out of her mouth.

"Emily…"

"It's your dad. He's gone."

Aaron couldn't quite understand, he wasn't sure what she was saying, and it took him a moment before he could react.

"What are you saying exactly?" he asked, his voice low, slowly understanding what was happening.

"Your dad…" Emily said, letting silent tears falling down her cheeks, not able to speak quite normally. "He killed himself this morning."

Aaron gulped hard, and realization hit him: his dad had committed suicide on the one-year anniversary of his mother's death. He suddenly felt oppressed, like there was a lump in his throat. His heart was physically aching, and his hands started shaking. Emily took him in her arms, but he didn't blink. He just shut down completely, withdrew. Just like when his mom had died, he saw his life passing before his eyes, from the first memory to the last. He suddenly understood why his dad had expressly demanded to be back in Mexico on that day. And why he had accepted to come to D.C. before. William had planned it all. When he had said goodbye the day before, he was very aware it would be the last.

"He had planned everything" Aaron said softly, his voice strangled.

"Probably" Emily answered, not that it needed any confirmation.

As she was repeating him everything Javier had told her, remorses started eating Aaron, for not realizing how bad his dad was feeling, for not understanding his father's plan during all the time he spent in Washington. He was fighting the tears that were threatening to overflow, breathing deeply to control himself. Emily released her grip, and only kept her head on his shoulder, sniffing. She was the one crying, but she knew he was just shut down, and he would break at one point or another. He was still processing, trying to swallow what she had said a couple of minutes earlier. And they were still in the White House, there was no way he would break apart in here; he refused himself to, so he wouldn't.

They stayed there, not moving, and then Aaron broke the silence for the first time in what seemed hours, but was only a few minutes.

"We need to go down there…" he said.

"I already bought tickets, first plane was tomorrow morning, I'm so sorry it's not tonight…"

Aaron nodded, not saying anything. Emily could see the despair in his eyes, the anger of not being closer to Mexico, the sadness of not being with his brother right now.

"Shall we go home?" Emily asked.

"What about…" Aaron wanted to ask.

"Already taken care of... Javier called about an hour ago…" Emily admitted. "I couldn't come down so I took care of everything before you could come up. Let's just pick up the girls from daycare, go home and pack."

Aaron nodded again. He couldn't do anything else.

"I'm going to see the President, tell him, and then we go. Okay?" Emily asked again.

But since Aaron wasn't answering, she just took him in her arms again, quickly kissed him on the cheek, and left his office, walking through hers to regain a little composure before seeing the President. She obviously couldn't say she was as affected as Aaron with all of this, but it was hard for her too. It was so sudden, so unexpected. They had seen him, alive, and looking fine, not even 24 hours earlier, and he was not there anymore. Shock was an understatement.

Later in the evening, the girls babbling was the only proof that someone was still alive in this house. Emily and Aaron had not said a word since they had come back from work, and the atmosphere was very heavy. Aaron had shut down completely, his face wasn't showing any emotion, his look was blank. It was understandable, Emily could totally see why, and truth be told, she wasn't really in a mood for talking either, but she didn't really know how to react. So, looking at the time, she decided to put the girls to bed, while Aaron was continuing to pack. And that's only when he knew he would be alone for a while that he sat on the edge of their bed and finally allowed himself to cry. Letting himself slide down on the floor, he curled up and put his head in his hands, starting to sob uncontrollably. His dad was dead, his dad had killed himself, and Aaron had not seen it coming. Images of his dad were flashing behind his closed eyelids, lying lifelessly where his mother had died just a year earlier. That's how he had killed himself, in a medicinal overdose, and Aaron couldn't stop thinking about all the irony and tragedy about this. Once again, remorses were eating him up, he didn't know what to do with himself anymore. Jump by the window, put a knife through his heart, getting run over by a car. He just wanted something, someone to stop this pain, this aching pain that he couldn't stand anymore. He stood up, found some running clothes, and decided to just run away. Without saying anything, he simply left the house, phone and keys in his pocket, and ran, ran, ran and ran further again. He ran fast, his breath short, not caring about the pain in his legs, about the stitch in his side, and when he finally arrived in an empty park, fell on his knees, and just screamed. He screamed as loud as he could, again and again, until his throat was hoarse, until he couldn't scream anymore. Tears were still falling down his cheeks, and he lay down on the grass, crying out loud, not able to stop. He could feel his phone buzzing again and again in his pocket, he knew it was Emily, freaked out about him disappearing like that, but he didn't want to answer. He gave up after the fifth call in a row, and just texted her "Okay. Coming home soon." He just didn't want to talk, didn't want to see anyone, and no matter how selfish this sounded, he couldn't care less in the moment. And that's only when it started raining that he decided to go home. By the time he was in front of their apartment, it was pouring down, and he was completely soaked. As soon as he crossed the threshold, Emily jumped on him, hanging her hands around his neck.

"You scared the shit out of me" she exclaimed.

"I'm sorry." he answered, his voice weak.

They stayed quiet for a moment, Emily still hung to him, getting her clothes wet from holding him so tight.

"Let's get you in the shower" she said, still hung to him.

He nodded and followed Emily as she walked him down the bathroom. After helping him to undress, she did the same and pushed him in the shower. The warm water was running down their heads, and she started washing him with the soap, massaging his shoulders, his neck, and he started crying again. Emily wrapped her arms around his abdomen, putting her head against his back, holding him tight, and said:

"We'll be okay, you'll be okay, we'll get through this together."


	40. The Letter

THE LETTER

"Aaron, I found this letter on the table of the living room…" Javier said, sitting on the couch next to his brother.

Aaron was intrigued and took the letter in his hands. Opening it, he realized quickly what it was. A goodbye letter. Their dad had written them a letter before killing himself. He looked at his brother, and then back at the letter. Was he supposed to read it now ? He didn't really know what to do.

"It doesn't say much. There isn't any explanation, if that's what you're hoping for." Javier continued.

Javier was as shaken as his brother. His eyes were red, he was disheveled, and he looked exhausted. For some reason, it was harder to lose William than to lose Adriana, probably because of the unexpectedness of the death. Also, they were now alone. No more parents. They were old, they had their own families, it was different, but they were feeling like orphans. Of course it should come one day, it was the way it was supposed to be, children were burying their parents, and there wasn't a good way to do that, but this shouldn't have happened like that.

"I'm not quite sure what I am hoping for right now?" Aaron finally said, despair obvious in his voice.

"Me neither…" Javier answered, honest. "There is this "why" echoing in my head. I feel like there is something we haven't done. We could have noticed something."

"You were there all the time Javier, you couldn't have done more. Me, however…" Aaron continued.

"Don't…" Javier stopped his brother.

"Yeah, I know what you want to say. But I feel that this is going to haunt me, that everything happened because I'm in D.C. and not here… I should have moved back here last year…"

"And what? Become Chief of Staff of the Mexican president? Come on… You know D.C. is where you belong."

Javier put his hand on his brother's shoulder. Even shaken, Javier was the strongest of the two. Probably because he was older, also because it was in his letter still in Aaron's hands, they didn't say one more word. They didn't know what to say anymore, and they didn't have the strength to talk. Javier poured whisky for Aaron and himself, and they just drank in silence, waiting for the time to pass, exhausted.

Eva and Emily had let their husbands on their own. It was too weird to see each other again for the same reason, exactly one year apart, and they were not really talking either. Their usual chit-chat about this and that, kids, life and work, was not really on their minds right now. They were just minding their own business, taking care of the kids, glancing away at their husbands some times, concerned about them.

"I'm worried about them…" Emily said softly, almost whispering.

"Me too" Eva answered, honest.

"I don't want to see again Aaron the way he was last year, it was just too hard."

"This is going to be so hard for Javier. He held on last year because William was still there, I don't know what is going to happen now…"

"We'll have to be careful, react at the first sign of something strange, but we'll be there for each other, that's why we are a family." Emily answered, putting her hand on her sister-in-law's arm.

Eva smiled softly, thanking Emily for her kind reassuring words after such a terrible day. Truth was Emily wasn't sure about anything either, looking away, she could see how hurt Aaron was and this was breaking her heart.

 _"My sons,_

 _A hard time is coming ahead for you. I know it will be, but I believe you will be stronger than me to overcome all of this. Ending my life is something I started thinking about long ago, even without realizing it. Deep inside, I've always known that if your mother were to leave before me, I would join her sooner rather than later. Losing her last year made me realize that it was my time too. I am sure that for you, there is no excuse that could justify my actions, and I believe you are right. The timing may sound terrible to you, but it was the right timing, it was what felt right for me. It may sound selfish to you, it may sound insane, but you are strong and I know you can continue your life without me. I couldn't continue my life without your mother. No matter what, continue to support each other, to keep each other's back. Don't forget I will always be proud of you._

 _Love,_

 _Dad."_

Sitting on the edge of their bed, later at night, Aaron was reading again the letter Javier had given him. It didn't make any sense. Aaron couldn't find an acceptable excuse to all of this. He was just so sad, and yet so mad at his dad, at himself, for not knowing what was happening, for not understanding what William was up to. Since he had learned his father's death, he had done nothing but try to find a reason, find an answer to his action, but he just couldn't find any. His heart was aching. He had not slept in the last two days, not even a minute. As soon as he was closing his eyes, burning from tiredness, all he could see was the lifeless shape of his dad, and no matter how hard he was trying to forget about all of this, he just couldn't. He had not been the one finding his dad, but the image was haunting him, more real than ever. They had spread the ashes of William a few hours before, and he was now sitting in silence in their hotel room. It was an empty, too impersonal bedroom, and even though he was in his hometown, it didn't feel like home. But staying at his parents' house was impossible, way too hard for him, and Javier's house was too small to welcome them all, so Emily had booked a hotel room, down the street where his brother was living. The girls were already sleeping, and Emily was in the bathroom. All he wanted to do was cry, and sleep. But he couldn't do any of those two things anymore. He had cried way too much in the past two days to be able to shed one more tear, and his dad was haunting him, tormenting his soul. Sleep was something Aaron wasn't sure he would ever get back. As soon as his mind was drifting in sleep, he was jolting, shaken by the image of his dad. It was repeating in his head like a broken CD.

Emily didn't really know what to do, or what to say. These past two days had been the most silent days she had lived in their life together. She couldn't remember one day that had been that bad, not even when Adriana had passed away the year before. She wanted to be here for her husband, but she didn't know what to do, or how to do it. All of this was too tragic to be able to act properly. Removing her make-up was like removing a mask she had been wearing for the past two days, she could see in the mirror the shadows under her eyes, the exhaustion, the strength disappearing. Her mind was racing, she was thinking about too many things, flashbacks to the previous year were coming to her mind, how hard it had been, how many times she has thought she would break, how many times she thought he would break. The next few months would be tough, she knew it, but she didn't know how hard it would. She was afraid, really afraid that this time, they wouldn't make it.

She splashed water on her face, trying to push back her dark thoughts, and walked out of the bathroom to see Aaron sitting on the edge of the bed. She quickly checked on the girls, both sleeping in their little beds, and then climbed on the bed, behind Aaron. He didn't even flinch when she put her arms around his shoulders, her head nestling in the crook of his neck, holding him tight. He put his hand on her arms, holding on to her, the sensation of her arms wrapped around him reassuring him. He felt safe, the world could collapse, he felt safe. She didn't say anything for a while, she was just there for him, but then broke the silence.

"Do you want to talk?" she started, slowly.

"What is there to talk about?" he answered.

"Anything, everything. You can say anything to me." she continued, encouraging him to open up.

He pushed her a bit aside, and lied on the bed, extending his arm to let her cuddle to him. Looking at the ceiling, he started speaking.

"There is no explanation. I cannot count the number of times I've read this letter, but there is nothing. I cannot understand why he did what he did. It just doesn't make any sense. I know it's hard since mom is gone, but does it justify all of this?"

"Is there any explanation to seek?" Emily asked.

"There must be. You cannot just decide to end your life like that."

"It wasn't just like that. He had planned everything. I'm sure he thought about it for a while…"

"That's what he says in his letter. But it doesn't change anything. Thinking about it is one thing, doing it is another."

"I guess that sometimes, the pain is just too hard, and you end up doing the unthinkable"

Aaron turned his head toward Emily, surprised by her comment.

"You understand what he did?"

"No… No I don't. But I cannot imagine what I would do if I were losing you."

Aaron kept quiet. What Emily had just said made him think and he suddenly put himself in William's shoes. What would he do if Emily were to die ? How would he handle it ? He couldn't even imagine what it would be like to lose Emily. Of course it would come one day, when they would be 80 or 90, when they would be old enough, have grandkids and a life full of memories together. But even then, he wasn't sure he would stand losing her. She was the love of his life, the mother of his daughters, the woman he didn't know could exist before he met her. He just couldn't live without her. Would he be as selfish as his dad, and leave alone his two beautiful daughters ? It was much more complicated than what he wanted it to be. Emily as well didn't know how she would react. She truly meant it when she said that, and deep inside, she was really scared Aaron would do the irredeemable, that he would leave her forever, and she was trying her best not to think about it. They had been through so many things together, deep inside, she believed they could go through everything, she truly believed it. Emily saw him lost in his thoughts and spoke again, almost murmuring.

"Hey, don't overthink this. I'm not going anywhere soon, and you're not either."

He turned on his side, Emily's head still resting on his arm, and started playing with her hair. He was looking at her in the eyes, her beautiful brown eyes that could say everything in just one look. He could see in her eyes how honest she was, how caring she was, how much she loved him.

"Thanks for being there for me" he answered.

"Always"

She closed the distance between them and kissed him softly. Everything she wanted to say was in this kiss, all her love, all her feelings, all her fears. She was exhausted, he was exhausted, it was all just too much. Their forehead resting against each other, Aaron closed his eyes, and for the first time in the last forty some hours, he finally found some peace. His dad wasn't stuck in his mind anymore, and the steady breathing of his wife made him fall asleep for a little bit.


	41. The Panic

THE PANIC

It was a Tuesday morning, Emily and Aaron were scheduled to go back to work after having spent a couple more days in Mexico. They had come back to Washington the afternoon just before, and they were still exhausted. Aaron had a hard time finding sleep, which wasn't surprising considering the circumstances, and it was filled with nightmares, shaken with memories. He wasn't sure how many hours he had slept since he had learned of the death of his dad, but it was not much. It was less than what he was used to, and added to the mental state he was in, Aaron was just a mess. He was trying not to show it, he was trying to keep a normal routine, forcing himself to take the girls to bed, have regular hours for meals, take a shower every day, but deep inside, all he wanted to do was hide in a corner, curl up in a ball and cry.

Emily was worried. She knew her husband too well to know that he was okay. Even though he was actually quite good at hiding it, she knew him better than anyone, and knew how torn apart he was. To be honest though, she didn't really know how to act, how to react. She wasn't sure whether she should let Aaron go through all of this his own way, or if she should go upfront and protect him. She was walking on eggshells, she wanted to ask him all the time whether he was okay or not, whether he was sure or not he should go back to work so soon after everything. In her opinion, Aaron should have taken a few more days off, maybe stay at home with the girls, take it slow for a little bit. But she could also understand Aaron, she could understand why he wanted to go back to work. It was easier to be busy, to have other things in his mind than the death of this father. But their work was very demanding, and she was afraid he wouldn't be able to handle it.

So, that morning, they had woken up in the same time, had gotten ready together, and had taken the girls to daycare together. The drive between daycare and the White House was only five minutes long, but it seemed to last an eternity. Neither Aaron or Emily was talking, and they could feel how heavy the atmosphere was. Emily knew Aaron didn't want to see the looks of people on him, their pity, their sadness, their compassion, all the "sorry" for his loss, and she really hoped people would think better than to do it. Of course, both White House Chiefs of Staff gone away for five days, everybody had known why. That was the price to pay for such a public job, and sometimes, it felt like it was a very high price.

Emily parked in their usual spot and got out of the car, waiting for Aaron to do the same. But she realized that Aaron wasn't going out, and walked around the car to wait for him.

"You com…" she started, opening the door.

But she quickly realized something was wrong. Aaron was as white as a sheet, was breathing faster than normal, and she could see sweat starting to form on his temples.

"Babe, Aaron…" she said, putting her hand on his arm.

He flinched at her touch and she withdrew her hand quickly. He was having a panic attack. She had never seen him panicking like this before, but she could clearly catch the signs of it, she knew what it was, and she wasn't sure what to do.

"Aaron, get out of the car, try to breathe" she said, putting her hand on his arm again.

"I can't" he managed to answer in between two jolts, his breathing still fast.

Emily knew what he meant. It's not he couldn't get out of the car, it's just that he couldn't get inside the White House, he couldn't go in and work there.

"We're not going inside, we're not going to work. I promise, just get out of the car to breathe." she said again, holding his hands in hers.

Aaron managed to do as told, and put his feet outside of the car, but stayed sat on the edge, closing his eyes and trying to focus on his breathing.

"Ok, listen to me, we're going home, we can pick up the girls if you want, or we can just stay home together and sleep, whatever you prefer, but we're not going to work. Okay?"

Aaron nodded, but was still shaking, holding tight to Emily's hands, needing the grip to her. Emily was disconcerted, she wasn't sure how to handle this. She knew she should try and make him change his mind, talk about something he likes, something he would like to do, but she couldn't think about anything. Her mind was racing, she knew Aaron by heart, but for whatever reason, she didn't know what to tell him in the moment.

"What do you want to do today, wanna watch a movie? Oh no I know! I'm sure there is a baseball game on TV! How does that sound, beer and baseball? We haven't done that in a while! Right?" Emily tried.

Truth is she didn't know whether it would work or not.

"So we could do that, order pizza, just chill for a good part of the day, and then we pick up the girls, and have a nice dinner together. We can go shopping, then we could cook dinner together, I know you like cooking with me! Don't you?"

Little by little, she could see Aaron's breathing starting to steady, slowly releasing his grip on her hands. That was working. She could feel herself getting calmer too, she was glad it was working, because she was starting to run out of ideas to calm him.

"Can you breathe?" she asked.

Aaron nodded, his eyes were still closed, but he looked better. The beat of his heart was slower, he wasn't shaking anymore. Emily released one of his hands to put her hand on his cheek.

"Can you look at me? Just me, nothing else. I'm right there."

Aaron opened his eyes slowly, and she closed the distance between them, her forehead against his. Aaron was finally feeling himself able to do something, to move, to breathe. Emily had managed to reassure him with her words. He still wasn't capable of going inside, but at least he wasn't feeling paralyzed anymore. Emily grabbed the bottle of water she had in her handbag and gave it to her husband.

"Take a sip" she advised.

"Thank you" he answered.

It was his first words after his panic attack, and Emily sighed, relieved he was okay.

"I can get in" he said, assured, but his eyes betraying his real feelings.

"Aaron, I meant what I said. We are not going to work today. You are not getting in that building."

He nodded, but kept his grip on Emily's wrist.

"Look me in the eyes, you are okay."

A few hours later, as promised, Aaron and Emily were at home watching a baseball game. They had changed into comfy sweaters and were lying on the couch with a blanket. It was weird for both of them to be there, without the girls, and just not working, but it was much needed. Emily had asked for a couple more days off, so that they could both get some rest after everything, but she knew it wouldn't be enough. What had happened this morning was much deeper than just a small crisis. She knew it would happen again as soon as he would come back to work, and she was really worried. She had never seen him like this, and truth was it had scared her a lot. It was real anxiety that she had seen in his eyes this morning, and she wasn't sure how to handle this. The thing was, no matter how hard it had been when Adriana had died, he had handled it because he knew it would happen. The first three months had been a real struggle, but he had kept it together, and had managed to go to work and almost live a normal life. But this time, it wasn't the same, she could feel it. It had been so sudden, so unpredictable, that Aaron had completely shut. It was different, because most of all, it seemed that work was a real trigger, as if he was holding it responsible for his dad's death. Emily couldn't quite understand the outline in all of this, but there was a connection between work and his state of mind.

Emily suddenly realized that Aaron was dozing off on the couch, and she smiled softly, happy to see him finally finding some sleep. Discreetly, she took her phone from the coffee table and started texting their deputies for updates. She had told them she would be available by text and that she wanted to know what was going on at the White House, but that Aaron couldn't be bothered in any case. She wanted to protect him as much as she could from work, but she knew a conversation about it would be needed soon. She was surprised with her own thinking, she was pragmatic about all of this, and knew Aaron would probably need to talk to a psychologist, and be on sick leave for a while. She was actually really worried for her husband. He was too stubborn for his own good, she knew she would have to talk some sense in his mind, and advise him to go talk to a psychologist. It would be a hard conversation to come, and she wasn't sure how to tell him. _"You need to talk to a shrink"_ was all that could cross her mind right now, and she didn't like that.

"Dad!" Aaron suddenly called aloud.

He started moving and shaking his head, his sleep clearly tormented with images of his father. Emily moved a bit closer to him and started shaking his arm, waking him up.

"Aaron, honey…" she said.

"Wait what, my da…" he answered, jumping.

"It's me, Em."

It wasn't the first time he was having those dreams, he had had them after his mother's death, and it had come back in the past fews days after his dad's suicide, but they were always very intense and stressful, both for him and her. As much as he wanted to avoid them, he couldn't, and it was always very hard for him to wake up from these. Emily, as for her, never knew how to react to these. Most of the time, his screams were waking her up, and she was always hesitating between shaking him up or just waiting for it to pass.

"Sorry…" he said, distress in his voice as he was getting a grip back on himself.

"You okay?" she asked.

"Yeah…" he answered, still dizzy.

"You haven't been sleeping well for the past week. Maybe you should go see someone?" she tried.

"A shrink?" Aaron asked, a bit upset.

"I would personally call him a psychologist, but yeah. At least to help you sleep… Maybe talk."

"I'm not sure there is anything to talk about… My dad committed suicide. He abandoned me and my brother. End of story."

Emily sighed. She knew Aaron would withdraw as soon as she would bring up the subject, she was walking on eggshells.

"You know… What happened this morning. It will happen again as soon as you will set foot in the White House. It's not just a one time thing…"

"Why wouldn't it be?"

"Because you have too many things to figure out before being able to focus on work again…"

Aaron stayed there in silence, sitting on the couch, looking at Emily. He didn't like it, but he knew she was right, he was not well, he needed to be taken care of.


	42. The Hell

THE HELL

It had been six weeks since William's death, six terrible weeks. Aaron had not set foot in the White House in these six weeks. He had tried, two days after his first panic attack, but this time, he had not even been able to leave the house before panicking. Emily had called the psychologist they had seen after her denial of pregnancy, and had forced Aaron to go talk to him. Since then, he was on sick leave.

It had been hard for Aaron to go talk to someone for the first couple of weeks, Not that Aaron didn't want to, he had no problem with psychologists, but he just didn't see what he could talk about with him. For him, what had happened, had happened, and there was nothing to talk about. He had completely shut himself, shut his emotions. He wasn't even sure he could feel anything anymore, he was like a robot, acting on command, or because he knew it was what he was supposed to do at that precise moment. He was strictly following the routine, waking up, preparing the girls, taking them to daycare, going to therapy, coming back, preparing lunch, spending his afternoon "resting", picking up the girls from daycare, taking care of them, preparing dinner for Emily. It was almost scary to see him act like that, and Emily had indeed noticed him behavior.

What she had noticed too was the wine regularly on the table for dinner. They were not a wine family, they were drinking a glass only a few times a month, mostly after dinner when the girls would be in bed and they would chill on the couch, watching a movie. But progressively, the wine had found its place on the dinner table, and though Emily wasn't saying anything, she was sure she didn't like it. Aaron had never been drunk around her or the girls, she was sure of that, she could have smelled it, and she was careful it wasn't a step he would cross, but she didn't know how to help him. He was just never talking. Casual conversations were their only conversations. _How was work? How were the girls today? How was your day? Did you see Bowman's latest speech?_ All Emily wanted was for Aaron to talk to her, but he wasn't.

Also, since Aaron was on sick leave, Emily had taken the lead and was working much more than before. One of their deputies had been made Acting Chief of Staff to relieve her from the workload, but still, it wasn't the same. She had finally found a rhythm, working with Aaron on an equal footing, she had gotten used to working with him all the time, and she just really missed him. It also meant that she wasn't seeing the girls as often as she used to, and this was what annoyed her the most. Regularly, she wouldn't be at home before bedtime, or she would leave home before their wake-up, and even if she knew they were fine, she was really missing them a lot. One day, after an awfully bad day, she had come home to her girls already sleeping, and she had not been able to hold her tears, fed up that this job was sucking up all the good moments with her daughters.

Besides, everybody was asking her how Aaron was doing, and she was just really annoyed. She didn't mind when Seth, Kendra, or even the President were asking, because she was quite close to them, but having people she barely knew asking just out of curiosity was starting to get her worked up. So, on that Tuesday afternoon, when she had been asked once again how Aaron was doing, she had just snapped at the poor person, even though for once it seemed without any ulterior motive. She had then hid inside her office, looking at the desperately closed door between her and Aaron's office. Closing her eyes for a couple of minutes, trying to calm down, she was wondering if she would hold like this for the next two and a half years.

"Hey, Em. Can I talk to you for a sec?" Seth asked, just after knocking at her door.

"Yeah sure…"

Seth closed the door to her office, and she understood it was something important.

"Okay, there is no easy way to say this…" Seth started.

"Just spit it, please." Emily cut him short, tired.

"Tiffany Gimble wanted me to comment on the Chief of Staff's DUI… Do you have… Anything to say?"

"DUI? You mean… Like driving under influence?"

"Yeah…"

"I wasn't arrested for DUI. What the…"

But before Emily could finish her sentence, she realized what it was. There was only one Chief of Staff working at the moment, but there were still officially two Chiefs of Staff. Aaron had just been arrested for DUI. Her mind started racing. She was worried for him, obviously, but she was also extremely pissed at him. And then she looked at the time on her phone, and realized that he was probably on his way to pick up the girls from daycare.

"I'm going to kill him…" she mumbled.

"Em? I'm still here, what is going on?" Seth raised his voice to take Emily out of her thoughts.

Emily shook her head to get her ideas straight, and started to speak.

"Damage control required. I'm going to see Kendra, she needs to bail him out. Say something, anything, but this cannot get out, trade it for an interview with the President if you have to. I need to pick up the girls from daycare. I have to go."

Emily raised from her chair and started packing things, taking her coat, ready to ask her deputies to handle everything.

"Em! Stop! What is going on?" Seth exclaimed, walking toward her desk.

Emily stopped and sighed, looking at Seth in the eyes.

"How many Chiefs of Staff are there?" she asked, annoyed.

"Two"

"Then, if it's not me…" she continued, suspense in her voice.

"Aaron?" he asked, surprised.

"Bingo…" Emily answered sarcastically.

"Is it that bad at home?" Seth asked, suddenly realizing everything.

"Let's just say it's been better…"

"I thought he was seeing a therapist?"

"He is, but I'm not sure it's helping that much… I'm kinda helpless to be honest. And right now I'm going to kill him too."

"Em… I'm sure being arrested made him realize his mistake… Don't be too harsh on him…"

"Harsh? Look at the time! He was going to pick up the girls from daycare with alcohol in his blood, damn straight I'm going to be harsh on him! I don't care how much he drank!" Emily snapped, angry.

Just thinking about everything was making her angry. She couldn't believe her husband would do something like that. She had always continued to trust him, even in these past six hard weeks, she had refused to fail him, to guilty him, but this was over. He had been about to put the life of their daughters in danger, and this was a line he shouldn't have crossed. She could be comprehensive and nice, but she couldn't tolerate this.

"I have to go talk to Kendra, please take care of this Tiffany Gimble, try to figure out how she learnt this."

Emily finished packing and left her office, leaving Seth in the middle of it, not really knowing what to do. She knocked at the door of his colleagues and told them she had to go for a family emergency, she didn't want to extend on the subject. Arriving in Kendra's office, she saw her hanging up the phone.

"Kendra, I need a favor."

"I know, he just called me."

"He what? Son of a …" she held her tongue "He didn't even call me!"

She wasn't the type of person who usually swore, but she was so angry that she had almost let words slip already twice in five minutes.

"He told me not to tell you… So…"

"Well, the press already knows, Seth told me. Can you bail him out? And bring him home?" she asked.

"Yeah sure, you want to come with me?"

"No, I have to pick up the girls from daycare, and right now, that wouldn't go well for him if ever he were to cross my path…"

"It's a hard time for him, Emily, don't be too harsh…"

"Why does everybody have pity for him! Damn it! He put our daughters' lives in danger!" Emily exclaimed, annoyed.

"The girls are fine. The worst was avoided. He just hit rock bottom, it's going to be better now…"

"It better be…"

A few hours later, Aaron was back at home, shameful and guilty. Emily was still extremely pissed at her husband. She had given him a death glare when he had arrived, and had not talked to him since then. She had made it clear that he should not say anything, because he would get yelled at and it wouldn't be nice. Tension was obvious, and Aaron didn't know what to do with himself anymore. He had wanted to take care of the girls, help them eat their dinner and take a bath, but Emily had refused to let him near Inez and Cami.

He knew he had screwed up, he really knew it, and he had no good excuse for his behavior, but truth was, in the past two months, alcohol had been the only thing keeping him away from his demons. He had tried to hide it to Emily, and it had worked pretty well, but today he had lost track of time and ended up leaving the house to pick up the girls still a bit light-headed. He wasn't smashed, not at all, but truth is he shouldn't have driven. He was capable of it, he could have felt it, but he also knew that he was above the legal limit, and that it was endangering his daughters. He really hated himself for having done that, and the only thing he wanted to do was to drink his sorrows away, again. Did he have a problem with alcohol? He didn't want to believe it, but it was starting to come clear that he actually did. Suddenly, he stood up from where he was sitting, and walked to the cupboard where he was hiding the bottles of wine and other alcohols. He took them all, one by one, and started pouring them down the sink of the kitchen, Emily's dirty look on him.

"If you go back to buy some more tomorrow, there is no point in doing this…" she snapped.

"Em… I made a mistake…" he turned around and leaned against the sink of the kitchen, his voice low.

"A mistake? That's how you call it? There isn't even a word to describe how gigantically you screwed up! Ours daughters! Inez and Cami! Do you realize what you were doing? I can tolerate a lot of things, but not putting them in danger. I trusted you Aaron!"

"What can I do?" he pleaded.

"Right now? I don't know. I love you more than anything Aaron, you know I do, and I am willing to back you up all the time, for anything, but today, you just lost my trust, and I don't know when or even if you will ever be able to regain it. What you did is serious Aaron… I understand that you are going through a rough time, but nothing will ever be a good excuse to what you did…"

"I'm sorry…"

"I know you are. But that doesn't change anything."

There was a pause. They were looking at each other in the eyes, but no emotion was going through them. Except anger and sadness, they couldn't tell what the other was feeling. It was the first time since probably forever, and it broke their hearts.

"I'm going to call my mom and ask her to come over, take care of the girls while I'm at work. I don't want to do it, but you don't leave me the choice here. I'm not letting you alone with the girls anymore, not until you're sober and back to work. If ever you can go back to work, cause I have no idea if Seth killed the story or not."

Aaron nodded. He didn't want to argue, and he knew there wasn't much to argue about anyway. There were tears in their eyes, they were both starting to cry, exhausted and frustrated. Something had been broken between them that day, something that would take time to be restored.

"Do you want me to sleep over at Nadia's tonight?" Aaron asked.

Emily shrugged, not knowing what to answer. She knew she wouldn't be able to sleep well if he wasn't there in their bed, with her, but she didn't want him there either, she was too frustrated and angry at him.

"I don't know what I want anymore, I don't know…"


	43. The Talk

THE TALK

A week later, Aaron and Emily were still not in good terms. Aaron had spent the first night after his arrest for DUI at home, with Emily, but she couldn't stop shrugging when he was too close to her. It had been too hard, and the morning after, he had asked Nadia to sleep over at her place. Since then, he had not left his cousin's apartment. He was missing his daughters so much, he was really struggling with being away from them. But in the meantime, he just couldn't look at them anymore without hating himself for what he had done. He was racked with guilt. The talk with his psychologist the day after had not gone well either. He had wanted to send him to rehab, and Aaron had almost lost it. He was refusing to go there, he just couldn't believe or imagine it was that bad. After that session, he had talked to Nadia, and they had started making plans to help him. They had thrown away all the alcohol she had in her apartment, Nadia had taken his debit and credit cards, preventing him to buy some more, and they had made a schedule with many activities, all day long, for him not to stay without doing anything. Running, boxing, cardio and other activities busying his minds were planned, along with eating healthy. Nadia was still working on the Hill but had managed to reduce her working hours to stay as often as possible with Aaron. She was coming home for lunch everyday, being sure he was following his schedule. His therapist had given him pills to sleep, with the clear instruction for Nadia to keep them away from him. She was keeping them in her purse or locked away. She trusted Aaron, but Aaron didn't trust himself, he didn't anymore. He was still shocked he had been able to do something like this, and he was trying to prevent anything to happen by clearing his environment from any potential danger. Almost every morning, he would go see the therapist. He had asked to go see him everyday. The therapist didn't think it was a good idea, that it wasn't of any use to go that often, but he had nonetheless agreed, supporting Aaron in his will to get better. Aaron wasn't even talking that much in sessions, he was mostly silent, or asking questions like _why did I do that? Why did I become like this?_ But he had never tried to find the answers on his own. There was like a block, he was stuck on repeat, and as much as he wanted it, he didn't seem ready to find the answers on his own. He needed to find the trick to make him answer those questions.

"Have you talked to Emily today?" Nadia asked one evening as they were watching TV.

"No, I wanted to, but I didn't dare calling…" Aaron asked, fidgeting with his wedding band.

"She doesn't hate you, you know, she is just worried…"

"How do you know?"

"She called me this afternoon… She asked me how you were doing? She said she misses you"

"I miss her too, and I miss the girls. I ended up not far from home when I ran this afternoon, but I didn't dare going to see them. I was afraid of what Sharon would say…"

"Your step-mom doesn't seem mean, I don't know what you were afraid of…"

"She isn't, she's actually even great, but she's also overprotective…"

"You know, everybody understands what you're going through, nobody hates you for that…"

"And I feel like I don't know anymore… I force myself to go see the therapist, but I feel like he doesn't help me anymore. He doesn't give me the answers I'm looking for…"

"Maybe because he isn't here to give you answers, but to make you look for them…"

"What do you mean?"

"It's your job to find the answers, not his. He is there to help you find them. If you cannot find them on your own, it means you have some unresolved business somewhere that prevents you from finding them."

"Unresolved business?"

"Yeah… It's like a TV show, you need to wrap up everything properly to be able to open a new chapter without leaving the viewers disappointed"

"I don't want to, but maybe I should go back to Mexico. Maybe that's where I'm going to make peace with myself."

"Not forever? Right?"

"No, not forever, but force myself to go to this house, clean up everything, talk to Javier, put the house up for sale, and really realize that all of this is over"

The two cousins didn't say anything else for the rest of the evening. Aaron was just thinking. The day after, he called Emily, found the strength to go see his daughters, and packed a bag to go to Mexico.

Saying that Emily was surprised was an understatement when Aaron told her he was going to Mexico. They had not talked in three days, and had not seen each other in eight. She was exhausted, worried, stressed, and over working. Thankfully, her mom had been a gem, and had come down to D.C. as soon as Emily had called her. Her relationship with her mom was always weird, they couldn't stand being together too long, but they were always there for each other, no matter what, whenever needed. Emily's heart was constantly aching, the pain almost unbearable. Every day, Inez was calling for her dad, and Emily didn't know what to say. Most of the time, she would be just evasive, with an answer like _he is away_ , but she knew Inez could feel something. Cami too, could feel it. She was nine months old, had started sleeping all night long a while ago, but had suddenly started waking up again. It was hard to settle her down, and it was breaking Emily's heart to know that all of this was because Aaron wasn't there.

Sleeping alone in this big bed was hard too. Every night, the cold sheets were making her think of how bad things were. She missed Aaron so much, she missed her husband, the man she had fell in love with the very first day they had started working together, the man that had made her a mother, the man that she had married almost three years ago, the man that was there for her, backing her up every single day, for anything, she missed her rock. There was a part of herself missing, lost somewhere, and she couldn't stand it anymore. She wanted him back. But she knew he needed to work on himself before, he needed to figure things out before he could come back. Deep inside, a glimmer of hope had appeared when he had called and told her that he had decided to go down to Mexico. She hoped he would find answers over there, and she hoped that it was the beginning of a new chapter for them.

He had lost his dad not even two months ago, but it seemed like an eternity for Emily. These past two months had been pure hell. She didn't think she had ever been around someone suffering that much, with her being so helpless. She truly didn't know what to do to help her husband, and she was struggling a little bit more every day, especially with him being away.

"Aaron's going to Mexico" she said, as she saw Seth walking by her in the cafeteria of the White House.

"What? How so?"

Seth sat on the chair opposite Emily, who was drinking coffee. She was on a break, a desperately needed five minutes break. Cami had woken her up in the middle of the night, it had taken an hour to settle her down, and just right when she had been able to close her eyes again, her phone had rung for an emergency at the White House.

"He called me an hour ago. He said something about talking with Nadia, unresolved business, and selling his parents' house." Emily continued after a yawn.

"Did he say when he was coming back?" Seth asked, concern in his voice.

"No, he took the car. He's going to drive for three days, and just go down there. This is insane. It's like a 2000-mile drive…" she paused. "He just told me he had gone home to see the girls for a bit, and that he loved me, and that he would be back as soon as he could."

"Woah, that's…" Seth couldn't find his words and just paused. "How do you feel about it?"

"I don't know. I was surprised he called me. Now I'm worried. But I hope that this will do the trick and that he will really come back afterwards… He will come back home." she insisted.

"So you think that this will help him?" Seth asked.

"I hope so yeah. It's going to be hard, the first days over there, but I think he needs to do this, to really realize everything maybe? Turn the page? I don't know…"

"You can never turn the page when you lose your parents…"

"No, I know. But I hope it will do the trick, you know. I don't even know how to explain this…"

"I get it. I hope you're right…"

"I can't believe we had to go through all this…" Emily sighed.

"Hey, it was hard, it was bad, but you are probably the strongest couple I've ever met. You can go through anything. Everything will go back to normal, I'm sure it will…"

"At least, he'll get his job back. I can't believe you managed to kill the story, I don't know how I can thank you…"

"You don't need to thank me, you know I would do anything for both of you."

Emily smiled and nodded discreetly. Seth had literally done miracles that time. She didn't know how he had convinced Tiffany Gimble to kill the story, but it was gone. Nobody would ever hear about the Chief of Staff's DUI anymore. Or at least she hoped so. As for Kendra, she had pulled some strings, and avoided Aaron any trial or any criminal record. This had been a huge relief for both Emily and Aaron. She really hoped Aaron would be back to work soon, she couldn't stand working alone anymore. Not that she wasn't really alone, she had colleagues and was helped, but it just wasn't the same. They had really struggled to learn to work on an equal footing, and now that they had finally made it, she really missed working with him. She didn't know when he would be back, but she wanted him back to work, back home, back in their bed, back in their life. She needed it.

She was in her thoughts, not talking, and Seth realized it. It was sad to see her like that, she was always trying to keep a good face to everyone in the White House, keep composure, have a poker face. But lately, and especially with her closest colleagues, the Senior staff, she had become worse and worse at hiding her true feelings. She hated it, because it wasn't professional, and she needed to be professional, especially at the moment, being the only Chief of Staff around, but sometimes she couldn't help it. In the past two months, she had often been lost in her thoughts, probably too often.

Seth stood up, put a compassionate hand on her shoulder, taking her out of her world.

"I have to go, but hey, don't worry too much. You'll be okay, both of you."

Emily smiled. Seth was right, they would be okay, they needed to be okay.


	44. The Backpack

(Sorry, this is long)

My heart is very heavy tonight as I publish this chapter. Thankfully, it was written a while ago and would have been published tonight, with or without the news. We learned two hours ago that Designated Survivor would not come back for a third season. So I'm going to ramble a little bit, because I need it. This TV Show is one of the greatest things since sliced bread (pun intended). A lot of people gave up during season two, I've noticed it, and it's true that this season was not good. It was going places we couldn't figure out, it was messy. They made ships we couldn't understand. They fucked up. The writers were not the same, and everybody could feel it. This is probably why I started writing this story, because I am a hopeless Emron shipper, and that we will never see them together. But this was truly my favorite TV Show. I don't think I ever got this caught up in a TV Show. I don't know why. Maybe it's because I love politics, maybe it's because deep inside, the White House makes me dream (not the current tenant, just the building and what happens in it). But yeah, this TV show was great. And it saddens me to write this in the past, to write that it WAS great. It had tremendous potential, actors were greats, and I feel like we've been robbed a little. It's a bit as if they had deliberately sinked the ship. And if I'm sad because the show was canceled, I am also sad for the actors. I really hope we will see them again soon, all of them, because they were all great, and they deserve a lot.

Hope you're still holding on to this story. I know it's getting long. See you soon.

(And drop me a PM if you want to chat about Designated Survivor's cancellation, I'll be all ears.)

* * *

THE BACKPACK

In front of a closet in his childhood bedroom, Aaron had started packing things, putting stuff in boxes, all of his childhood memories, all the things he wanted to bring back home. In the past five days he had spent in Mexico, the only place he had not yet had the courage to get in was his parents' bedroom. The door was closed, and he couldn't resolve to open it. He knew he would have to do it soon, but for now, it was enough. He had managed to enter the house only a couple of days after arriving in Mexico, and was slowly progressing on his path. Each door he was opening was not only a new room to pack, but a new chapter of a book to finish.

Javier had not yet managed to come to the house. In the two months since their father had died, his brother had struggled a lot. Maybe not as much as Aaron, though it was up for debate, but he had a hard time grieving, a much harder time than for Adriana. He was closer to their dad than he was to their mom, and it had been a real shock to discover William's body on that day of May. He was dealing in his own way, and that included not having been able to go to this house yet.

Everything was silent, the whole house was silent, and it was weird. Last time he had come here, he was with Emily and Inez, Cami wasn't yet born, and it was full of life, full of joy, even if it had ended up with the tragic loss of Adriana. A photo of their renewal of vows was framed in the living room, next to many other pictures of Inez, Cami, his brother and sister-in-law, his nephews, his aunts and uncles. The Shore family was a keeper, they had a lot of photos everywhere, they loved keeping all these memories on the walls, remembering all the good times.

In the kitchen, there were still all the baby stuff his parents had bought after the birth of Aaron's nephews, and that they had used when Inez was there too. High chair, bottles… They loved their grandchildren so dearly. Aaron still wasn't sure he could realize that they would never see them grow up. His mom had not even had the chance to meet Camila.

Everywhere, he could find an object, an image that would bring back memories. And the back of this closet was no exception. There were still several clothes that he had when he was a teenager. He wasn't even sure he could fit in them anymore, but it was making him laugh, he didn't know how he had dared wearing such clothes, even twenty years ago. And behind these clothes, he found an old backpack. It was worn out, the colors were not as bright as before, there was a hole on top of it, and only one of the zipper was still working. But it wasn't any backpack: It was the backpack of the trek he had done with his dad and his brother when he was 17, on the summer right after his graduation from high-school, and Javier's graduation from college. The last time the three men of the house would be together. They had taken backpacks, and had walked all along the coast down to the closest national park. They had hiked, slept in the woods, made bonfires, and spent the best week of their lives, talking about their future, their past, their present, their hopes, their dreams and their fears.

Aaron was in his thoughts, and suddenly wondered if this was the ultimate goal to all of this, if this was his final destination before being able to heal properly. He thought about it for a while, staring at this backpack in his hands, and then stood up. He looked around in the house for Javier's backpack, and drove to his brother's house. Arriving there, he entered without knocking and put the two backpacks in front of his brother, who raised an eyebrow.

"Feel like going on a trek?" Aaron asked.

"What are you talking about… I'm going to work tomorrow, unlike you." Javier snapped for no obvious reason.

"I'm on sick leave, but thank you for your concern…"

"Sorry…" Javier said, his voice low. "I'm listening…"

Javier sat up properly on the couch, put his beer on the coffee table, and looked at Aaron, waiting for some kind of explanation.

"You remember these backpacks?" Aaron started.

Javier nodded.

"I found mine at the back of my closet, and yours in the attic. This trek, that we did with dad, it was the best week of our lives, it was the end of something, but it was also the beginning of something else. Maybe this trek is the answer to all of our questions. Maybe we need to do it again, to start something else."

For the first time in ages, Aaron's eyes were shining again, he finally had a goal in his life, a reason to live. Javier could see it, but still couldn't quite get all of it.

"I'm not sure I get it. You want us to do the same trip than we did with Dad, 20 years ago, but without him. How a walk down memory lane with help us exactly?" Javier answered, not really convinced.

"I know that you've tried to push back all the memories of dad, far away. But this is not what will make us heal. It's confronting these memories that will help us. Nadia told me that I needed to wrap up everything properly before being able to start a new chapter. This is it, this is what will help us heal. Go back on this trek, talk, have all these good memories, and just keep the good ones."

"Okay, maybe. But I still have to go to work tomorrow, so I still can't come."

Javier was still clearly not convinced. So Aaron finally sat, next to his brother on the couch, and started talking. He started telling everything he had been feeling in the past two months, how he had struggled when Adriana had died too.

"You know, when Mom died, it took me months to overcome it. Really, I was a mess. And I thought that I had grieved properly, I really thought I had. And Emily gave birth to Cami, it felt like mom had died for something. I don't know, it's hard to explain, but it felt like mom was reborn in Cami." Aaron paused. "And also, I was working like crazy, I mean, you probably can't realize it really well, cause working in the White House, it's like nothing else, but it really helped me going on, I didn't have the time to think about anything else, I had work to do. But with Dad's death, it being so unexpected, I realized that I had pushed back all of my memories very far in my mind. It clicked. And it came rushing over me, it hit me so hard that I felt like I couldn't survive. That's why I started having panic attacks, that's why I started drinking, that's why I started doing stupid things. We need to find a way, not to push away these memories, but make them better, embellish them. We need to remember Mom and Dad in a good way, that's how we're gonna go through this, not any other way…"

Aaron stopped in his speech. He had just given it all to convince his brother, if it wasn't working, then he would have to go on that trek on his own. He looked at his brother, lost in his own thoughts. They both stayed quiet for a while, Javier thinking, and Aaron clearly waiting for an answer.

"So you want me to take a week off from work and go on that trek with you?" Javier broke the silence.

"Yes." Aaron answered, not that it really needed any confirmation.

Javier didn't answer, but took his cellphone out of his pocket, and Aaron understood he had convinced him. Javier was calling his boss.

The morning after, they were both gone.

For a full week, they walked along the coast of Mexico, no phone, no contact with the rest of the world. Just two brothers, like they had done twenty years ago with their dad. They were walking, and sleeping, and eating, and that was pretty much it. It was like going back to their roots, like a pilgrimage. Every once in a while, they were stopping, sitting on rocks overlooking the sea, and talk, remember the good things about their mom and dad. Sometimes, they would also cry, because it was really hard for them to think about everything without crying. But little by little, they were realizing that their hearts were less heavy, that sadness was not as sad, that they could finally open their hearts and talk.

"You know" Javier started "When you got your acceptance letter to go to college, Mom was so scared that I cannot count the number of times she told me about it."

"She was afraid cause I was leaving the country. I know she was, even though she was just showing her pride to me. But you know, when you left to go to college in Mexico City, she was pretty damn scared too…" Aaron continued.

"Oh, I imagine. She always hated Mexico City. The place of drugs and killings like she used to say." Javier chuckled.

"Why did you come back?" Aaron asked.

"Home? After college?"

"Yes."

"Because of Eva. She went to college with me, but she didn't want to spend the rest of her life in a big city. She hated it."

"But why home? Why not somewhere else?"

"Because her parents retired right in these times, and they moved an hour away from Mom and Dad. It wasn't done deliberately, but when we learned that they would live not far, it was just like the right call. We knew we would find jobs in our field, so we just moved back."

They fell silent for a little bit, and then Javier started again.

"So, we're going back home tomorrow. And then what?" he asked.

"And then, we walk to that house, we pack everything we want to keep, we throw away what doesn't need to be kept, and we sell the house. It will always be our childhood home, we will always see it that way, but it has a lot of potential, another great family can start its own life in it. We wrap up this chapter of our lives, and we open a new one."

"You sure this is the right thing to do?"

"Yes. It's been a while I haven't been sure of anything, but yeah. I'm sure of this."

Aaron was sure. He couldn't say he was fine, but he could finally say he was getting better. After that, he would deal with the rest of his anxiety, finally get the answers he had been looking for in the last two months, and go home. Go home to his wife, to his girls. He missed them so much, every single day, every single minute. It was time to come back.


	45. The Return

The last part of this chapter is **rated M**. You're warned ;)

* * *

THE RETURN

After coming back from his trip with Javier, Aaron had spent most of the time packing things in their parents house, cleaning things, throwing away old stuffs, and thinking. Javier had finally found the courage to walk into that house and pack his things too, what he wanted to keep. It had taken them a few more days before they could actually enter their parents' bedroom. They had stayed in front of the closed door for a good half hour before finally opening it, shaking, unsure of what they would do. Everything was intact, exactly the same than when Javier had found their dad three months ago. Nobody had touched anything since Javier had called an ambulance and they had taken their dad away. After that, it had been better, Aaron could feel it had truly been better. He was not out of the woods yet, and was still struggling every night not to drink his sorrows away. The nights were the hardest. It was still extremely hard for him to find his sleep, and when he would, most of the time he would wake up in sweat, trembling and shaken by nightmares.

After a couple more weeks in Mexico, he had decided it was time to go home. He still had a lot of work to do on himself, but he knew he couldn't do anything else here anymore. He had packed everything he wanted to keep. They had cleaned the house. And they had put it up for sale. He would come back, when it would be sold, and it would finally all be over, but right now, he needed to work on himself, and work on his life. He had only texted Emily a few times in the month he had spent in Mexico, and on the way home, he realized that communication had been broken between the two of them. Something had been broken. He had not even thought once about how she could feel in all of this, how hard the past three months must have been for her too, how she had handled everything. The only thing he had thought about was how much he missed her, and how much he missed Inez and Camila. But every time he had thought about them, he had pushed these thoughts at the back of his mind, trying to focus on getting better.

A simple text was all he sent when he left Mexico on that Thursday.

 _Can I call you?_

Yeah, just a simple text. He was so abashed by his behavior, that he didn't know how to say it. He wasn't even sure he should come back home, or staying longer at Nadia's. He wanted to come back, but would Emily be okay with that ? And that also meant seeing Sharon, and he wasn't sure he could stand his mother-in-law's look on him, on what he had done. So he had just sent four basic words. Emily had called back an hour later, and he had pulled over to talk for a bit. His words were strangled, unsure. Hers too.

"Can I come back home?" he asked.

"Aaron, this is your home. You come back whenever you want, whenever you can."

"I'm on my way. I hope to be there on Sunday, in the afternoon. I wanted to come back Saturday, but I left later than planned."

"Update me on your way, I'll be home to wait for you. How are you feeling?"

"Better. I guess. I cannot say I'm fine, but I'm better. And I miss you. And I miss the girls."

No matter how hard it was to pronounce these words, Aaron had made the decision to always be open with Emily, to always tell her the truth, the whole truth, because she had suffered a lot from his time withdrawing, and he had too. He couldn't do that anymore, he had Emily to think about.

They stayed over the phone, silent, for a few more minutes. They didn't know what to say, they could hear each other's breathing, and it almost felt as if it was all they needed. Suddenly, he heard Emily sniffing. She was crying, he knew she was.

"I'm sorry…" he said.

"I know you are. But you're coming back. That's all that matters now." she answered.

Another silence.

"I'll see you on Sunday then. I love you Em."

"I love you too. Please be safe on the road."

Aaron almost let a tear fall down his cheek. Hearing Emily for the first time in weeks was weird. Really weird. He had missed his voice, it was almost as if he had forgotten how it sounded. He started driving again, thinking about how the reunion would be. He had a lump in his throat. His feelings were mixed between the anxiety and the excitement to see her again.

He was in Charlotte, North Carolina, on Sunday morning when he left his hotel. He texted Emily, saying he would be home in the middle of the afternoon. And when he arrived later that day, and parked in front of their apartment, he was greeted by his wife who opened the door. She jumped in his arms and cried. She didn't say anything, he didn't either. She looked exhausted, her hair was tied up in a messy bun, she wasn't wearing any make-up, had an old sweater from his and dark sweat pants on, and had shadows under her eyes. He was disheveled, had not shaved in the past two weeks, had no gel in his hair, and was wearing shorts and an old tee-shirt from his teenage closet. He cried too. They were a mess, but they were together again.

Sharon had taken the girls for a walk, it was a beautiful summer afternoon, and she had taken the stroller down to a park nearby, knowing Aaron and Emily would need some time alone before seeing Inez and Camila. Emily helped Aaron unload the car with all the boxes of things he had brought back from Mexico, and it's only when they sat around the kitchen island to drink a glass of water, half an hour later, that they started talking. Aaron wanted to tell Emily everything, but he knew it would require a lot of time, and that Sharon would be back with the girls soon. So he didn't say start relating his story, he just asked how Emily was, how she was holding up. Emily told him everything, about how grown the girls had in a month, how Sharon had taken care of the girls. She told him about everything he had missed, and before she could finish relating her month far from him, the door opened on their daughters. Inez was chitchatting with her grandmother when she realized that her dad was there. She stopped on her way to the living room, and it took her a few seconds to really realize. And then, she called her daddy and ran in his arms. She started talking and talking and talking, as if she wanted to tell her father everything that had happened since she had last seen him. Nothing and no-one but Aaron mattered. She invited him to play with her and every time he would escape her sight, she would call aloud for him, as if she was afraid of him leaving again. Aaron took Cami in his arms too, and he sat on the couch, playing with both his daughters, his heart heavy from having missed so many things in a month. Emily sat next to them, her heart heavy too. She wanted to cry again, but she didn't. It felt good to see him back at home, see him with the girls, see the girls so happy with their dad.

Sharon stepped aside, went to buy some groceries, and cooked dinner for them. After that, she just retreated in her bedroom, understanding they needed time alone. At one point, it was time for Inez and Cami to go to bed, and Emily decided to take the lead and put the girls to bed. Truth be told, she really wanted to be alone with her husband, no matter how much she knew the girls needed their dad. She wanted to be selfish, for once, and just be alone with Aaron. What she had not planned was Inez's resistance to go to bed. It was easier with Cami, she was still too young to express any opposition to go to bed, but Inez… Their eldest had decided to stay up with Aaron, and even though she was yawning from exhaustion, she was refusing to go to bed. Aaron and Emily had ended up bargaining with her, and after three stories and being tucked in bed by her father, she finally fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.

When Aaron entered their bedroom, it felt weird. It had been a month he had not set foot in it. He changed and sat on their bed, waiting for Emily to come. It was home, it was their bed, their sheets, their room, but it felt strange anyway. Emily walked into their bedroom and sat crossed-legs, opposite him. He did the same to face her, and they held each others' hands, looking at each other in the eyes. It felt like they were still walking on eggshells, they were still not sure what to do, what to say. But one thing they were sure about was that it felt good to be back together. Aaron broke the silence, and started talking, telling her everything about how he felt, about his trek with his brother, about the things he had found in his parents' house, about the nightmares he still had, about the guilt that was still eating him up, about how he still wanted to drink his sorrows away but had resisted. She listened, she didn't say a word during his story, she didn't flinch once, she didn't frown once. He was opening up, she couldn't be more proud of him. And when he stopped, done with his story, she closed the distance between them and locked her arms around his neck, holding him tight.

"Thank you…" she said. "Thank you for telling me everything."

"I'm not hiding anything from you anymore, not one thing."

She pushed him to lay on his back and lied on him, kissing him fiercely, with all the passion and love she had for him, all the lack she had felt during his month away. She knew that not everything was fixed, that he still struggled, that they would still need time to regain each other's trust, but they were together again, and it felt good.

"Make love to me, Aaron." she asked.

He looked at her in the eyes and put his hand in her hair. He stayed put for a few seconds, waiting to be sure that's really what she wanted, but her eyes couldn't betray her true feelings, he could feel that it was what she really wanted. And what he really wanted too. It had been such a while that they couldn't even remember the last time they had made love to each other. And then, he pushed her on her back, and lied on top of her, kissing her tenderly. Their moves were slow and sweet, they were quiet. His lips were in her neck, and then tracing a line down her chest, in the valley of her breasts. He tugged on the hem of her tank top and took it off, revealing her breasts. He pressed his mouth against them, his hands lingering on them, making her shiver. Her eyes were closed, her hand in his curly hair, inviting him to continue his ministrations. Through her panties, he kissed her right where she wanted him and a muffled sound escaped her lips. It was sweet and tender, neither one of them wanted to rush things. He took his tee-shirt off and lied back on her, their naked skin brushing each other for the first time in months. He kissed her, their tongues dancing together, his hands cupping her face.

"I want you, Aaron" she murmured in between two kisses.

Aaron nodded and went back down between her legs. Slowly, still too slowly, he took her panties down her legs, leaving a trail of kisses on her left leg, and going back up on the other one. He could feel her pleading look on him and her hands started sliding his underwear off his legs. He wanted to be sure she was ready and slid his hand between her folds, but was stopped before he could do anything. He looked up to her, and she nodded. They didn't need any word and she wrapped her legs around him, pulling him to her. He entered her slowly, and started moving still so slowly. Nobody could describe what they were both feeling. It had been too long, and it was too good. They were still quiet, only their heavy breathing could be heard. Emily's hands were around his neck, keeping him close to her, her teeth biting his shoulder, keeping herself from moaning. Digging her nails in his back, she invited him to go faster, her hips thrusting with every movement he was making. She didn't want this to end, ever, but she also needed to come so much. Aaron's lips were in her neck, sucking her sweet spots and leaving marks behind his kisses. He could feel her walls starting to tighten, and her legs pulling him even closer to her. No matter what, they could still understand each other in bed, this was the place where communication could never be broken. His thrusts getting faster, he buried his head in her neck, his breathing fast and heavy. Emily could feel herself coming too, and brought one of his hands between them, down on her clit. His fingers brushed her clit, and that's all it took to make her come. A strangled moan escaped her lips as she bit his shoulder, and after a couple more thrusts, she felt him come inside her too. His movements stopped, their breathings were fast, Emily's arms tightening around him, not wanting him to ever leave. Still entangled, they stayed put for long minutes, and when Aaron finally moved from her, he lied next to his wife and she curled up against him. Bringing the sheet back on them, they fell asleep even before they could turn the light off. They were back together, that's all that mattered.


	46. The New Year

THE NEW YEAR

"Emma! Michaela! Dinner is ready!"

Daniel, Emily's older brother, was yelling from the kitchen. The twins were 12 years old, it felt like they were almost grown ups, but it was still a lot of work to raise them.

"Damn, why don't they ever listen to me. Please Em, raise your kids better than I did with mine…" Daniel said again.

"Piece of cake. Nobody can raise kids worse than you did!" Emily answered, chuckling. "Don't worry, I'll go get them"

It was New Year's Eve. Aaron & Emily had been invited to spend a couple of days in Boston with Inez and Cami, where Dan & Rachel were living with their twins. Mike, the youngest of the siblings, was there too, with his fiancée, Ashley. They had not yet taken the plunge, but were still together. Emily was quite astonished, she would have never thought Mike could keep a girl that long. They had been together for more than two years now. Maybe he had grown up and was finally settling down. He looked happy, and this was making Emily happy.

This was the end of a year, another tough year. Since William's death 7 months ago, Aaron had been at its worst. It had taken a lot of time for him to recover from such a tragic event, and though he had come back home a month after leaving for Mexico, it's only at the end of October that he had managed to go back to work. He didn't have nightmares anymore, didn't have panic attacks either. But to be honest, he still was really careful with how he was behaving. He was keeping himself busy as much as possible, had kept the habit of running almost everyday. Even if it was just for half an hour, it was his way to clear his head after a hard day at work, or to go out of their apartment and get some fresh air. There was still no alcohol in their apartment, and Emily was still locking away medicines. She was confident in Aaron's strength, but he, however, still couldn't trust himself with it. He didn't know if he could stop drinking after a first glass, and locking the pills away was just an extra-safety measure for bad days. He still had bad days, they were not as bad as before, and not as frequent as before, but he definitely still had some. Especially days like this one, days around family, that reminded him his lost ones, or special days like his birthday, that he had celebrated a month ago, or the birthday of the girls.

Getting to be trusted by Emily again, as well as trusting himself, had been a real challenge. It was actually still in progress, he knew it was, even if Emily wasn't showing it anymore. But even harder than gaining back Emily's trust was probably trusting himself again, and not feeling guilty anymore. What he had done was still in his mind every single day, and every single time he was taking care of Inez and Cami. He knew they were too young to understand anything, that they wouldn't even recall anything happening, that in fact, the worst had been avoided thanks to his arrest, but he couldn't help hating himself when he was looking at them. He could still see how protective Emily was with the girls, and even if he had finally been authorized to be alone around the girls and Sharon had finally gone home, he knew it wasn't the same. In fact, he had never driven alone again with the girls in the car, he just couldn't do it.

Though, Emily had been very supportive with Aaron, and he couldn't thank her more for that. She had become very protective with him too, reacting to any sign of weakness, and she had become an excellent listener. He had learned to talk, and to listen to her. In a way, even if it was still hard, they could feel that they were growing closer than ever. Having said it all on the first night he had come back from Mexico had been a sort of trigger, and he now couldn't hide anything from his wife anymore.

Climbing upstairs to get her nieces, Emily walked passed the guest bedroom where Aaron and her were staying. Aaron had just changed for dinner and stopped her on her way to the twins' bedroom.

"Em… I don't know if I should drink tonight…" he said, a bit apart.

"That's up to you. You know you don't have to, nobody will judge you." she answered

"I think I want to, but I'm just not sure I can stop. I don't know if I trust myself on that."

"You have already drunk wine recently, why wouldn't you be able to stop?" she asked.

"Because it's New Year's Eve, and you know how these kind of evenings drag on…"

"You're worried about the after dinner, aren't you? When the boys will go out for drinks and smoke?"

Aaron nodded. It was a sort of tradition at the Rhodes' and the previous years, he had been more than okay to go with them. It had also been a sort of ritual of initiation to enter the Rhodes' family, that he had always followed ever since, even if they were the ones inviting over for New Year's Eve. The boys would escape, whether it was just in a garage, or in a bar, and drink, smoke and laugh. But this time, it was different. He couldn't get smashed just like the previous years, and he would never be able to again.

"They know. They won't force you to go with them..." Emily tried to reassure him.

"Yeah... But it's... a tradition. I don't know." Aaron tried to explain.

"Aaron... Traditions are sometimes made to be broken. It's not because you are not going with them tonight that they will keep you out of it next time, or that something will change in the future."

"But I will never be able to do this again…"

"So what ? Who cares ? It's just a damn stupid tradition…" she paused. "And if you want me to be completely honest, I think we're starting to be too old to get completely smashed. Even for New Year's."

Aaron smiled and Emily hugged him.

"I'm here for you. Lean on me if you need." she said, still hugging him. "Inez and Cami are downstairs with Mike and Ashley. I'm bringing the twins and I'll be there. You'll be fine."

Aaron nodded and walked downstairs to find Inez and Cami and his brothers-in-laws, chatting about how big they had gotten since they had last seen them. With Dan living in Boston and Mike in Hartford, it wasn't that easy to see them often.

Inez had turned 2 in October, and Cami 1. Inez had started being potty trained, for now unsuccessfully, and she was talking more and more. She could make full sentences for some things, and she was repeating everything her parents would say, even swear words. Once, Emily had let a swear word escape her mouth, which she fortunately rarely did, and she had heard Inez repeating it. She had been surprised and shocked, and had realized that the time of innocence was gone. As for him, Aaron was very proud of Inez: speaking Spanish with her from the beginning had worked, and she was speaking Spanish with him too. Of course, she would often mix English and Spanish, which was actually very cute, and would even speak words of Spanish with her mother. Emily could feel that Inez was already more fluent in Spanish than she was, and this was annoying her, even if she knew it shouldn't be that much of a big deal, since almost everybody was speaking English in Aaron's family.

Cami had started walking just before Christmas. Since she was already 14 months old, Aaron and Emily had been pretty excited. They had imagined she would start walking in the same time than Inez had, but it had taken her two more months. They had been a bit upset with that, even if they knew it was normal and that Camila wouldn't do anything like her sister.

"Papá, where Mommy?" Inez asked when she saw her dad appearing.

"She's upstairs, with Emma and Michaela. She'll be there soon."

"I want eat." Inez continued.

"Yeah? You're right, it's getting late for you. I'll reheat your dinner. You're staying here with Cami? I'm coming back." Aaron answered.

Aaron looked at the clock and realized it was later than he had thought. They had started eating in the same time than Inez as much as possible, since now she was old enough to stay up longer, but tonight was quite a special night, and they wouldn't eat as early as usual. It was already almost bedtime and she had not yet eaten her dinner.

"Aaron, can I give Inez her dinner?" Michaela asked when she arrived downstairs with Emily.

"You know, she mostly eats on her own now. But yeah, I'm sure she'll be happy." Aaron answered.

Michaela and Emma were 12 years old, and wanted to do everything like grown-ups. Especially Michaela. Since they didn't have little sisters or brothers, they were happy to take care of their cousins every time they could, and were playing often with them. Michaela was behaving like a big sister with Inez and Cami, and Aaron and Emily could never say no when she was asking something. Michaela was Emily's goddaughter, so she couldn't refuse her anything anyway. Emily and Aaron loved seeing her taking care so well of their daughters.

The dinner went smoothly, and much better than Aaron had anticipated. Except for a flute of champagne when they stepped into the New Year, he had not drunk anything, and nobody had been oppressive about it. He was really glad it had happened that way, but he knew Emily had been the reason why. He knew that she had secretly asked everybody to be careful with alcohol on that day, and he was really grateful for that. What had surprised Aaron though was that his brothers-in-law didn't escape after the dinner to drink on their own. They had stayed with everybody else, breaking the tradition. He knew they had done it not to embarrass Aaron, and this had warmed his heart. He felt supported, and that felt good. A part of his family may be gone, but he could definitely feel that he wasn't alone, the Rhodes' would be there for him, no matter what.

"Em, did you ask your brothers not to go out tonight?" Aaron asked when they were finally alone.

Emily was curled up against him, resting her head on his shoulder, in bed later at night.

"I didn't. I thought about it, but I didn't need to." Emily answered honestly.

"I kinda feel guilty that they didn't go because of me. But I have to say that it felt good not to have to say no."

"I'm sure they could imagine it, that's why they did it."

"You have amazing brothers, do you know that?"

"I do."

"I love you Em. I know I don't say it often, especially recently, but I really do. I couldn't have made it without you this year."

"I love you too hon', you know I would do anything for you."

It had been a hell of a year, but they were finally ready for a new one to come.


	47. The Confrontation

**05/31/18: IMPORTANT NOTE FOR THE UNDERSTANDING OF THIS CHAPTER:**  
I finally finished rewriting the whole story, and everything is online. There are only minor changes, the story hasn't changed, it's mostly the writing, that I hope is much better, especially in the first few chapters. I also corrected some mistakes, I know there are still some, but I'm doing my best to catch them, I haven't lost hope yet to have a mistake-free fan fiction one day. **  
 _However_** , as I told you before, I took that as an opportunity to rewrite Aaron's dad story. Bye bye Alberto, hello William. I know, this might be a little confusing for you, but it was becoming clearer everyday that Aaron's dad story wasn't making any sense, so I changed it. Since this chapter is centered around Aaron's family, I advise you to go back to chapter 5 (The Meeting) and chapter 34 (The Grandfather) for a little insight of what changed in this story. If you really don't want to go back to these chapters, let's just sum it up this way: William is American, he ran away from Texas when he met Adriana and never looked back. Which is why Aaron speaks English so well, and also why Mexico is home, and not Texas.  
I really hope this will not bother you, please tell me what you thought about it. I know some of you are still reading, so don't hesitate to tell me what you think of these changes.  
And with that, here is an new chapter! Enjoy!

* * *

THE CONFRONTATION

"Aaron, would you by any chance have family ties with Fred Shore III?" Lyor asked, entering the Chief of Staff's office.

Aaron raised an eyebrow.

"Maybe. Details please?" Aaron asked.

"Fred Shore III, 75 years old, living in Brownsville, Texas. He owns a small brewery." Lyor continued.

"I know him, or I've heard of him at least. Why?"

"You know we are planning this trip to the border with the President, to reaffirm…"

"Yeah, yeah I know." Aaron cut him short. "I'm Chief of Staff. And I'm coming with you."

"Well, it would be good for communication if Kirkman was stopping by, see people. Not only officials you know."

"Yeah I know. I gave you the green light to do it. Can you go straight to the point?"

"We got a list of local shops to choose from, you know, places that would be good for this kind of events. And we were thinking that this Shore & Sons Brewery would be nice."

"No." Aaron answered.

"Can I ask why?"

"You asked me if I knew the guy, so I guess you have the answer. Don't you?"

Aaron was starting to get annoyed by Lyor and he was showing it. So Lyor left Aaron's office without another word, and Aaron walked to Emily's office next door.

"Have you…" he started.

"I heard…"

"Why did we have to choose Brownsville over any other town? There are like plenty of twin-cities at the border. Why this one?" he asked, angry.

"I don't know. I think it's the mayor who asked. Not us who decided."

"We still could have said no…"

"Come on, Aaron. You know it wouldn't have looked good."

"Yeah. And now I'm gonna have to pretend like everything is fine, and walk into that shithole brewery smiling and shaking hands with my racist asshole of an uncle that I have seen twice in my life. Awesome."

Aaron sat in the chair opposite Emily and sighed. Emily stood up and skirted her desk to sit next to him.

"I know. It sucks. You don't have to go… I can go instead you know." she said, stroking his leg gently.

"You know you can't. I'm the Mexican-American guy, I'm the one supposed to go. This is good for communication, blah blah blah, you know the thing."

"Yeah… I'm sorry. Maybe there is still something we can do about it?" she asked.

"What do you want to do? It's in three days. It's too late. I gave the green light, they are working out the details." Aaron rolled his eyes.

"How are you feeling with confronting him?"

"I'm not confronting him. I am going to ignore him just like he's ignored me, my brother and my parents for the past forty or fifty some years."

"But he knows who you are, doesn't he?"

"Of course he knows. When I packed my parents' house, I even found a letter from him to my dad. Saying that he was very proud that his nephew made it in Washington, that I was the real pride of the family…"

"That is fucked up. Did you even know that your dad was still in touch with him?"

"He is fucked up… That's the thing. Dad never was in touch with him. Not since he left the town, not since he married Mom."

"Are you sure about this?"

"Yeah, he took us to the funerals of our grandparents when we were kids, that's all. Javier talks with a cousin, Charles' daughter I think? I'm not even sure… I just know he found a way to tell the Shores that Mom and Dad had died."

"Wait… But they weren't there… at the funerals? I never saw them, I never met them…"

"Why would they come?"

Emily was stunned, she didn't say another word. Of course, she knew that Aaron never had had relations with his dad's family, but she just couldn't get how anyone could disown a member of their family. Maybe she was biased, because compared to Aaron's, her family was perfect, but it just didn't make sense to her. How could someone be so hateful to ignore a part of their family for 50 years. Aaron didn't know much about this side of his family, except for the things William had told him. The Shores were anchored in Brownsville, Texas, one of these twin-cities at the border with Mexico. For a long time, they had seen Mexican immigration as a godsend, as they were employing people in the Shore's ranches to take care of the cattle. But with the decades, it started becoming harder to find workforce, and one day, Aaron's great granddad sold the family ranch. This marked end of a great era for the family, and since then, they had worked here and there to make ends meet. Only Fred, Aaron's uncle, who had opened a brewery after years of hard labor in the region, had managed to land on his feet. Therefore, saying that the Shores didn't like Mexicans was an understatement. So, some 50 years ago, when William hopelessly fell in love with Adriana and broke the known rule of the family, not to date Mexicans, he had hoped that his dad would forgive him. But instead, the whole family had joined forces against William and had told him to leave his first love. Still young, he had accepted and had tried to get over her. After six months apart, they had found each other again and had run away from the border, never looking back. Aaron and Javier had met the family only twice: for their grandfather's funeral, 30 years ago, and for their grandmother's, 25 years ago.

Therefore, it was putting it mildly to say that Aaron was upset when he found out that he would have to walk into that brewery and he couldn't do anything about it. He had heard, from his dad, that his uncle owned a brewery, and that his cousins would take over him soon. He also had another uncle from this side of the family, Charles. But he didn't know anything about him except that he was the youngest, four years younger than William, and eight years younger than Fred. Aaron didn't even know how many cousins he had from Charles, he just knew about an Alice that was in touch with Javier, and to be honest, he wasn't really sure he wanted to know more.

"Here goes nothing" was all Aaron murmured to himself when he entered that brewery three days later. The press was there, following the President. The Chief of Staff was a bit further away, checking that everything was fine, while Lyor was bossing people around, making sure everything looked good to the press. Aaron was letting Lyor deal with things, he just wanted to hide in a corner and be invisible.

Aaron saw a man shaking Tom Kirkman's hand, and introducing himself as the owner of the brewery. That's how he recognized his uncle. If he had crossed his path in a street, never Aaron would have thought that this man was Fred Shore III, blood of his blood. He was tall, like Aaron, and had a certain stature, but that was all. That was the only resemblance between the uncle and the nephew. Aaron stayed at the back for as long as he could, trying to stay professional. What he felt though was a mix between indifference, hate and stress. He couldn't figure out why. Indifference and hate were obvious: Fred Shore was an asshole that had disowned William. But stress? Aaron couldn't get why he should be stressed about meeting his uncle, there was nothing to stress about, and the lump in his throat was totally incomprehensible to him. He wished Emily would be there to support him, but in the meantime, he didn't want her to meet this man he hated so much.

For too long, Aaron listened to his uncle talking with the President, explaining this and that about how beer was made, and about how his business was running in the family. Aaron wanted to roll his eyes, he was exasperated by the man. But then, his uncle said something that made him raise an eyebrow. Fred Shore said he was friend with the mayor. It clicked: His uncle had plotted everything, he was the one who had suggested the mayor to invite the President, and he was the one who had deliberately done everything so that Aaron would end up walking in that brewery. Aaron frowned. Now, he was angry.

When it was over, the President started walking away, and Aaron too, but before he could cross the threshold, he was stopped. He had hoped it wouldn't, but deep inside he knew it would come.

"Aaron…" Fred Shore said.

Aaron turned around to face the man, but didn't say anything. He was bitter, angry, and he wanted to be sure that Fred would feel it.

"How are you doing? It's been a while…" his uncle started.

"A while? Yeah… Twenty some years? Twenty-five maybe?" Aaron answered, harsh.

"So, what have you been up to?" Fred asked, curious.

"Don't you know? Didn't you plan everything to trap me here with you? What do you want exactly?" Aaron said, still annoyed.

"I'm just glad to see what you have become."

"Why would you care exactly?"

"Aaron, we're family…"

"No, we are not. The only thing we share is our last name. And if it weren't for my dad, I would have changed it for Espinosa long ago. We don't have anything in common, and you know that very well."

"I guess William taught you well…" Fred chuckled.

"Don't even dare talking about my dad when you didn't even come to his funeral last year." Aaron spitted.

"His funeral? Honor someone as weak as your dad…" Fred laughed.

This last sentence made Aaron's blood boil. He got closer to his uncle, standing at his height, and looked at him directly in the eyes. His fist clenched and his voice got harsher.

"The only thing preventing me from punching you right now is people around us. Unlike you, my dad taught me values, taught me to control myself, taught me to be open-minded…"

"Yeah. And look where it took him. To be so open-minded…" Fred spitted.

"Enough… Dad! Stop it now! Leave Aaron alone."

Aaron turned his head to discover a young tall man. He had not even paid attention to him before. Obviously, it was one of his youngest cousins, but he couldn't remember him. His cousin pushed Fred, telling him to walk away. And then, he introduced himself to Aaron.

"Sorry. I know my dad is an ass… I'm Ben… I guess you don't remember me." he said, shaking Aaron's hand.

"No, I'm sorry I don't. I'm Aaron. But you already know it…"

"Yeah. My dad is an idiot. I don't understand why he wanted to confront you…"

"You just answered your question…"

"Yeah." Ben chuckled. "I'm sorry things are like that…"

"Me too…"

Aaron glanced outside and realized everybody was already leaving, so he quickly escaped the brewery, apologizing to his cousin. Sitting in the car on his way back to the airport, he was lost in his thoughts. No matter what, he couldn't understand why his family was so messed up. This confrontation had not gone as he had planned, he had not planned to almost lose his temper in front of him, but the death of his father was still too recent for him to stay calm in front of any kind of provocation. What had surprised him though was that he had felt real despair in his cousin's eyes, as if he was truly sorry for Fred, as if he truly wished it was different and that they would actually know each other. Maybe the new generation would be better, maybe there was still hope for the Shores to become decent men. A sad smile appeared on his face when he realized what they had been through, what stupidity and racism had lead to. He wondered if one day, when the older generation would be gone, they could renew with the Shores, if they would be part of this family again.

 _"_ _How did it go ?"_

Emily's text had just popped on Aaron's phone, and it took him out of his thoughts.

 _"_ _Not well. He confronted me before I could leave. He was an ass. I almost lost it. And I met one of my cousins. He seemed nicer than my uncle. Too bad I guess I'll never know him."_

The fact that Emily had thought about sending him a text warmed his heart. He knew she was great, she had always been great to him, but every kind thought was making his heart melt. Maybe he would never know this Texan side of his family, but it didn't mean he was alone. His family was in Mexico, his family was in Washington, his family was in Connecticut and in Boston. It's not only blood that makes a family, and in that moment, he was sure of it.


	48. The Holidays

THE HOLIDAYS

"I don't feel comfortable with leaving the girls for a full week…" Emily said.

"You know your mom is going to enjoy taking care of them…" Aaron answered. "Don't you want a well deserved break? It's been a year we didn't take one single day off…"

"I know. I dream of these holidays too. But shouldn't we take the girls with us?"

"It's not called honeymoon if we don't spend time on our own, just the two of us…"

Emily wasn't really convinced. It's true, they had never really taken the time to go on a honeymoon. They had eloped in Alaska, had renewed their vows in Mexico, but had not really gone on a real honeymoon. But now that the girls were here, it was really weird to leave them alone for a full week. Aaron was fully aware of that, it was weird for him too to leave the girls. Inez would soon turn 3, Cami 2. They were still young and had never spent much time with their grandparents. Plus, both Aaron and Emily working like crazy, it was true that they weren't spending that much time with the girls, and that they could probably enjoy some days off the four of them together.

"It's just that, for once that we have holidays, maybe we could spend them in family…" Emily argued.

"You're right." Aaron admitted. "Maybe we could just escape for a few days and spend the rest of the week together?"

"That sounds nice. I like it. But it means we won't be able to go to Paris… I know you wanted to go to Paris for our honeymoon…"

"I guess we can go to Paris another time. Maybe we shouldn't even consider that as our honeymoon, but just holidays."

"So, we are pushing back the honeymoon again?"

"Yeah. One day, we'll go."

A month and a half later, they had finally managed to get a full week off together. It was the end of the summer, and they had decided to head off to Nantucket. It was easy, it was not that far from Boston, they had dropped the girls over there at Dan & Rachel's, where Sharon would take care of them, and had headed directly to Nantucket afterwards. It was actually Emily's brother who gave theme the idea. They had never been there before, but they had heard of how beautiful the island was, and since it was the end of the summer, most of the tourists were already gone, but the weather was still beautiful enough to have great days. They were starting to consider having a real honeymoon only once they would stop working at the White House. It would come soon now anyway, and it was crazy to think that so much had happened in all the time they had spent at 1600 Penn. The girls would also be older, it would be easier to leave them for a longer time, and since they would spend more time with them, they wouldn't feel as guilty as now with leaving them.

Yes, they were still feeling guilty, even if they would spend only four days away from them, and the rest of the week with the girls. Parenting was a full-time job. They were often laughing at the fact that they couldn't take a day off from work, that they were always running here and there at the White House, and that they couldn't differentiate week days from week-ends. But the truth was that parenting was an even harder job. It was a 24/7 job, and compared to working at the White House, they couldn't forget about this one. Even far away from the girls, they were worrying all the time, thinking about them all the time.

"Do you think they will be okay?" Emily asked.

"Of course they will. Michaela is going to take care of them half of the time. Your mom will do it the other half of the time. And they will be spoiled all day long." Aaron answered, stroking his wife's leg gently.

"Yeah, you're right. And we are not far from them. Honestly, I'm glad we didn't go to Paris. I really want to go there one day, but I would have freaked out knowing that we are so far from them. I wouldn't have enjoyed our time there…"

"Me neither" Aaron said, honest. "At least, we're only a few hours away from the girls. We are on an island, that's right, but it's easy to come back."

"I promise we'll go to Paris one day."

The first day, they biked on the island. It was a beautiful sunny day, and they enjoyed a long ride on the coast, sunglasses, wind in the hair and gently tanning under the September sunbeam. They took pictures, tons of pictures. The landscape was absolutely stunning, they couldn't get why they had not come here before. They were real tourists, visiting the different lighthouses and major spots of the island, stopping here or there for an ice-cream or any other treat. It was as if they were back to the beginning of their relation, two lovers enjoying their first holidays together. They were happy and carefree.

The second day, it was even warmer and they decided to swim for a bit. Now that Emily was used to Mexican waters, she could definitely say that it was chiller in Massachusetts, and she let out a cry when a cold wave hit her. Aaron laughed, saying that she had become high maintenance since they had started dating, but he suddenly agreed when he ended up in the water too. Having spent the first eighteen years of his life in the warm waters of his hometown, he was often praising how perfect Mexico was, proud of his Mexican origins. It had been more than a year he had not set foot over there, and deep in his heart, he really missed it.

"We should take the girls to Mexico one day. I miss it." Aaron said, as they were tanning after swimming.

"Next holidays?" Emily asked.

"Yeah… Actually, I was thinking about something…"

"I'm listening." Emily answered, curious.

"Since we got money from selling my parents' house, I was thinking, maybe we could buy a summer house over there."

"In your hometown?" Emily asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Maybe. I don't know. I don't want it to be too close to home, because I don't want to walk by my parents' house everyday, but not far, maybe in a town nearby."

"That sounds like a lovely idea hon'…"

"We could even take Michaela and Emma one day, they've been asking for it for years…"

"Oh my… I can already imagine them bouncing if we were telling them that we are going to Mexico for the holidays."

"They would brag about it at school for days afterwards" Aaron laughed, making Emily laugh too.

They spent their third day in the beach house. They woke up to a very cloudy day and before they could actually leave the bed, it started pouring down. They laughed and ended up spending the day inside. They made love more times than they could count and in more places than they could think of, enjoying this time not being bothered by anyone. It had started being a recurring joke after Cami's birth, and Aaron always loved to tease Emily about that, as she would always complain at how kids would be the death of their couple. They cooked, and since it was always a moment of fun and relaxation for them, it almost turned into a food battle, but they restrained themselves, not wanting to clean their mess afterwards. And they watched movies. They fought over which movie they should watch, Aaron making the remote control dangle above Emily's head as she was unsuccessfully jumping to catch it. Emily pouted, Aaron made fun of her, but in the end, she fell asleep watching the movie, curled up against him.

Their fourth day was their last one in Nantucket. They were heading back to Boston in the evening, and they tried to make the most of their last hours on the island. They walked down to the beach hand in hand, found a little cove where they wouldn't be disturbed for the last few hours of their little getaway. They laughed, they made out like horny teenagers, laughing at their very unusual behavior, they ate lunch, and then walked back to the beach house. It was already time to leave, and though they were sad not to be able to stay longer, their parental instincts weren't very far and they could say they were very happy to see their girls again. Of course, they had skyped with them every day, and since they were growing up, they were both relating their day to their parents. Sometimes —most of the time— it was still incomprehensible and they would laugh about it, but still, it wasn't like being with them.

"I'm going to be so happy to see the girls again." Emily said, as they were driving back toward Boston.

"I know, me too. It's weird, I'm gonna miss being just the two of us, but I'm really happy to see them again." Aaron answered.

"It's crazy to see what being parents make us say…" Emily joked.

"Right? I can't believe we are celebrating Inez's third birthday next month. And Cami's second…"

"Time flies. I remember it as if it was yesterday…"

"Me too… I was freaking out so badly."

"Oh yeah you were. I know you didn't want me to notice how freaked out you were, but I could definitely see it…"

"Oh I'm sure. I don't think I've been more scared of anything than becoming a father."

"Really?"

"Yeah… Even with everything that we've seen, the Capitol bombing and the rest, I think it's becoming a father that scared me the most…"

Emily didn't answer right away, trying to think.

"Well, honestly, yeah it's what freaked me out the most too… becoming a mother. I never really thought about it, but now that you make me think about it." she said.

"I always thought that White House Chief of Staff was the hardest job in the world, but I was wrong" Aaron chuckled.

"I guess things change."

"Absolutely…"

There was a pause, and then Aaron started a conversation he had been dying to start for a while.

"Do you… Sometimes think about having another kid?" he asked.

"Already?" Emily teased.

"No. I mean not yet. And not before we're out of the White House, but…do you?"

"I do. Well, I've always thought that I wanted three kids."

"Three? I guess we've never talked about that…"

"Probably not, you're right. Don't ask me why three, I don't know. Yeah, I've thought about it. But I think the jury is still out on this."

"Why that?"

"Because I'm afraid we would spoil that baby too much."

"Why would we? Aaron asked, curious and surprised.

"Because we don't see the girls growing up, we don't have time with the White House, and this baby would come when we have time, and I'm just afraid it would be unfair for Inez and Cami…"

Aaron didn't say anything, he was thinking. He really wanted another kid, maybe a little boy. He loved his girls very dearly, but sometimes he was dreaming of a little boy running around the house, bothering his sisters and having all these "boys talks" with his dad. But now that Emily had raised the question, he wasn't sure anymore. He could understand why she would say that, and she was probably right. It was making him think too.

Arriving at Dan and Rachel's, Aaron and Emily were greeted by a very talkative Inez who started telling them everything about her days with her cousins, her grandparents and her uncle and aunt. She gave them the picture she had drawn, she didn't forget to snitch on everything Cami had done in these four days, but forgot to tell her parents that she too had thrown a tantrum when it was time to go to bed. Her parents listened carefully, nodding to every word she would say, laughing sometimes. When she was over, they finally walked to Cami to kiss her. She had not paid attention to her parents since they had arrived. She was in this phase, she didn't care about her parents, or at least she was acting like it, so instead of greeting them, she had continued her little games, not even glancing at her parents for one second. She was doing it when they would pick her up at daycare too, so they were not really surprised and had shook their heads, laughing a little at the stubbornness of their youngest.

"Cami, aren't you saying hello to Mommy and Papá?" Emily asked, tickling her daughter.

"No." Cami answered, not taking her eyes off of the toy she had in her hands.

"So, you are staying with Uncle Dan and Auntie Rachel? We are leaving you here…" Aaron asked.

Cami shrugged, still not paying attention to her parents. Aaron and Emily looked at each other and started laughing.

"Mommy, Papá!" Inez exclaimed, surprised to see her parents in a fit of laughter.

"Sorry honey. Cami is a little cheeky monkey who doesn't want to say hello." Emily said, trying to calm her laugh.

"Cheeky?" Inez asked.

"Yeah, just like you…" Aaron answered, and caught their eldest to tickle her too.

Yeah, they had spent four great days alone in Nantucket, but it felt good to be back with their daughters and they were ready to spend the next fews days off with them.


	49. The Nostalgia

THE NOSTALGIA

After their week of holidays, Emily and Aaron had been back to work and swamped into it since then. The last few weeks had been so crazy that they were rarely eating dinner in family, Aaron or Emily taking turns to stay at work until late in the night. Most of the time, since Aaron was more of a morning person, he would wake up early and be the one on "morning shift", going to work before sunrise. Emily would wake up later, enjoying early mornings with the girls before preparing them for daycare and going to the White House, helping out her husband during these long days. Aaron would leave work early, pick up the girls from daycare and take care of them in the evening, hoping for Emily to come back home before midnight. It was really frustrating, both Aaron and Emily wanted to spend time together with Inez and Cami, and not just taking turns. Sometimes it almost felt like they were divorced parents trying to spend equal time with their daughters, and they both hated that.

At the beginning of October though, they had managed to break this habit for a couple of days, just the time to celebrate Inez's and Cami's birthdays. As they would do every year, Emily's parents had come down for the girls' birthdays. Aaron had wanted for Javier and Eva to come, but they had not managed to get enough days off to come all the way from Mexico. So, only Emily's parents were there and they had celebrated two nights in a row. For whatever reason, it always felt weird to have two birthdays that close to one another. One day, Emily had talked about it with Aaron, wondering if they should celebrate both birthdays in one day, but had decided otherwise, it felt like they were picking one daughter over the other.

Inez and Cami had been covered in gifts again, from their parents, their grandparents, and even from their uncles who had shipped things from Mexico, Hartford and Boston. With them growing up, they were more and more aware of what birthdays meant, and it was really cute to see them. They had skyped with their uncles, thanking them for the gifts, babbling and telling them everything about how they had spent the day. Day by day, the difference of age between Inez and Cami was fading, and everybody could see they were growing closer. Of course, they would always be one year apart, but now that they were two and three, it was different from when one and two.

The morning after Camila's birthday, Emily arrived at work a bit later than usual. Her parents were still there, so she had enjoyed a real nice breakfast with them as she knew they were going back to Connecticut in the afternoon and they wouldn't see each other before. She had dropped the girls at daycare and drove straight to work, but her mind was somewhere else. When she arrived there, she was headed directly to her office and closed her door, not really wanting to be disturbed. Aaron was in a meeting, so she didn't take the trouble to close the door between their offices, but she was quite happy to be alone for a bit. She sat in her chair and closed her eyes, starting to cry softly. She felt stupid, because it wasn't anything important or dramatic, but she suddenly was feeling very nostalgic and tired of the job.

Before she could wipe the tears off her cheeks, Aaron entered her office with a file in his hands, ready to ask her something.

"Em, can you…" he started. "Babe… What is going on?"

Aaron quickly walked to her and sat on the edge of her desk, holding her hands.

"Nothing, it's stupid…" she answered.

"Em… I know you don't cry for no reason…"

"My parents just told me that they decided to move to California… They are selling the house." she said, sniffing.

Aaron raised an eyebrow, not really understanding.

"They want to live under the sun of California now that they are both retired…"

"It's great! Isn't it? Why does that make you cry?"

"Because they are selling my childhood home, I won't ever go there anymore. And it makes me realize that with this freaking job, I haven't gone there in like four or five years. And I'm never gonna be able to do it anymore…"

"Oh honey…"

Aaron helped Emily raise from her seat and took her in his arms. He stroked her back gently, trying to soothe her.

"Em… It's okay. It's not because your parents won't live there anymore that we won't go there, we can still go on holidays. And they just decided it, right? Nothing is done yet, maybe we'll even have time to go before they actually sell the house." Aaron reassured.

Emily chuckled, not believing Aaron.

"And Mike is still living not far…" he continued, releasing his embrace.

"About that…" Emily cut him short. "Mike and Ashley are moving to Chicago. She found a job over there. So nope, no Rhodes left in Hartford… And worst of all? Mom didn't even realize that she let it slip, but I think Ashley and Mike are expecting…"

"What? But that's awesome!" Aaron exclaimed.

"Awesome? I barely see our daughters, I see my nieces once a year, and my brother is going to be a dad and he's leaving so far away I won't see this baby grow…" Emily started crying again.

"Okay, Em… Come on, it's just a bad day."

Aaron pulled her tight in a hug and Emily started sobbing.

"Why are you so emotional with all of this? It's only great news." he asked.

"I know it's just a bad day, but I'm tired of all of this. I just want to go home and do nothing, I've been fighting in this White House for the past seven years, and I haven't seen them passing, and all of this is making me realize all that I've missed."

"I know, I get it. It's hard, but it's almost over. Can you realize, there is only one year left? In one year and three months, we'll be packing our offices. And we will finally have some time for ourselves, and we will finally spend time with the girls."

"One year and three months…" Emily repeated.

"Yeah, I know, it seems far like that, but we've been through seven years like this. Seven freaking years in this building, we can make it one more year."

"My parents will already be in California…"

"Maybe, but we will have time to visit, because I don't know about you, but after working eight years in here, I think we will deserve a very long break before finding another job, don't you think?"

"Yeah, I guess you're right." Emily smiled softly.

"So, you know what? In one year and three months, we will do all these things that we have been pushing back since forever. We will finally go on our honeymoon, we will visit Dan in Boston, we will take the twins to Mexico with us, and we will visit Javier down there, maybe buy that house we've talked about. And then, we will take a trip to Chicago to see Mike, but only when the weather gets better, because I don't want to freeze my ass over there. And then, we will go to California, because your parents deserve a nice sunny retirement, but we deserve a nice sunny break too."

Aaron's little speech made Emily chuckle.

"You know, it's actually not that bad in Chicago… the weather…" Emily said.

"Em… I know you've lived in Connecticut all your childhood, but I lived mine in Mexico, we don't really have the same tolerance to the cold… Washington is already too cold for me."

This time, Emily finally really laughed. She wiped the tears off of her cheeks, her heart lighter after such a morning.

"And we will finally have time to spend with our daughters." Emily said, smiling.

"Absolutely!"

With that, Aaron kissed her softy, ready to continue their hectic day at work. Emily was really feeling better.

"What did you want me for?" she asked, remembering that Aaron had come to her office for a purpose.

"Oh! The Ambassador of Russia has gone and done it again… Can you take care of him? I have a meeting in the Roosevelt room in… crap five minutes ago, I'm going." Aaron said, suddenly rushing out of Emily's office.

"Will do…" Emily shouted.

Emily smiled and opened the file Aaron had dropped on her desk. She spent the day between meetings and paperwork, only having time for a cup of coffee in the afternoon. A little before six, Aaron left to pick up the girls from daycare and go home. Emily sighed, annoyed that she couldn't leave in the meantime, but they were behind on the schedule after going home early the past two days. It had been like that for almost a month and apart from the last two evenings, she couldn't remember when they had had a quiet evening just the four of them. The last months had been so crazy that it even happened often to go to work during week-ends, and as she was walking through the now almost quiet hallways of the West Wing, she was thinking about her life.

The White House had brought her so many things. Professionally, it had brought her to the best job in the world, the only one she could dream of. It had brought her to amazing countries, meeting with important people. It was challenging her everyday, pushing her to the best version of herself. She felt like she was doing something useful. She was really saving the world every day. Personally, the White House had brought her to Aaron. And though they had had a rough start, fighting everyday, hating each other, stepping on each other's toes all the time, they had finally found their way together. When she was thinking about it, she could say that it was obvious, that all this bickering could only lead to them being together. She didn't want to admit it at the time, but she had always been attracted to him, even when he was the worst with her. Yeah, the White House had brought her to Aaron, and being with Aaron had brought her to her children, these two beautiful smily girls that she loved more than anything in the world.

So yes, the White House had given her everything, it had fulfilled all her hopes and desires, but sometimes, she would think about her life before. When she was still Chief of Staff to Tom Kirkman, secretary of HUD, she still had her week-ends, she would come home to Connecticut a few times a year, she would go out in bars and drink with college friends, she would sleep more than five hours a night. She would see her family. And it's true, if the White House had not happened, Aaron wouldn't have happened, and Inez & Cami either, so yes she was really thankful for it. But sometimes, it was just hard. She was realizing that in the past seven years, she had gone to Connecticut only twice, she had spent time in her childhood bedroom only twice, and soon enough, she wouldn't be able to do it anymore.

She went home, late at night, or early in the morning to be more accurate, and curled up against her husband in bed.

"Can we go to Connecticut for Christmas? I want to spend one last Christmas at home before it's gone." she asked softly.

"Anything for you babe." he answered.


	50. The Birthday

THE BIRTHDAY

Thirty-Eight. No, it's true, it wasn't exactly a milestone birthday, but it was the last one Emily would spend as White House Chief of Staff. They had finally started their last year of mandate, and every single day was a last day for something. It felt good, but it felt weird in the meantime. Three days ago, they had held their last Correspondents' Dinner, almost a month ago, they had their last Easter Egg Roll.

It was little "lasts", but still, when you spend seven years in the same building, working days and nights with the same persons, all these lasts mean something. And though they had never really celebrated birthdays of staffers, they had decided to celebrate every one of the senior advisers' birthdays in this last year. It had started with Seth, in January, Emily was next in April, and it would continue with Kendra in August, Aaron in November and Lyor in December.

For these days of celebrations, they had set rules: First, they would eat lunch together. If possible, they would try and make it to the Italian restaurant at the corner of the street, and if they couldn't they would just eat at the cafeteria of the White House. Second, buying presents was not allowed. Third, they would talk about their first memories with the staffer who was celebrating their birthday, about what they would imagine he or she could do after the White House, and what was the most stupid thing he or she had done in all these years in the West Wing. it had gone pretty well with Seth, they had all laughed, shamed him a little, and given him their ideas about what the future may hold for him.

Recently, as the rhythm had been a little bit less hectic, Emily and Aaron were managing to go to work in the same time most of the days. This morning was a one of these mornings. Emily woke up later than Aaron, and before she could realize that her husband was not in their bed, the nice smell of coffee was filling the room.

"Breakfast in bed, every birthday should start off on the right foot" Aaron said.

Emily stretched out and smiled as Aaron was putting a tray full of delicious food on their bed. As she sat up, he leaned to kiss her.

"Happy birthday honey"

"Thanks babe. Did you wake up earlier to do all that?" Emily asked.

"Not that early, don't worry for me."

"Are the girls still asleep?"

"Apparently, I can't hear anyone, so I guess…"

"Well, stay in bed with me then, for once we don't have an emergency at the White House, let's just enjoy this morning."

Aaron smiled and sat next to his wife, who gave him a piece of her pancakes. They ate breakfast together, laughing and cuddling, enjoying a nice morning. It was fore sure early, the sun had barely come up, but it was still better than being woken up by an emergency at the White House. After their breakfast, Emily pushed the tray on the side and they continued cuddling and kissing. Things were starting to heat up, they were kissing eagerly and their hands were roaming on each other's bodies when they heard a little voice in the other room.

"Mommy! Papá!"

Both Emily and Aaron laughed.

"I knew it…" Aaron said. "I don't even know how I imagined we would have time for that before their wake-ups…"

Aaron stood up and went to Cami's bedroom to pick her up from her bed. She wasn't yet getting out of her bed alone, Aaron and Emily were trying to push back as much as they could the day they would buy her a toddler bed, but they knew it would come soon. They weren't ready for it. It had already been a huge step when they had gotten that new bed for Inez, and they couldn't quite believe Cami would have hers soon too. Aaron came back to their bedroom with Cami in his arms and he murmured something to her ear before letting her jump on her parents' bed.

"Happy birthday Mommy!"

Cami jumped in Emily's arms and kissed her cheek, held tight by her mom. Suddenly, a little sleepyhead appeared at the doorway of their bedroom, her cuddly toy in her hand. Rubbing her eyes and not really awake, the little girl was trying to shove her long dark curls away from her face and cuddled against her father. He murmured something to her ear too, and still groggy, she walked to her mom and climbed on the bed and cuddled her.

"Happy birthday Mommy!"

Emily's heart was full. Her day couldn't have started in a better way. She stayed in bed, cuddling with her daughters while Aaron was preparing breakfast for the girls, and in that moment she knew her life was perfect.

An hour later, Emily and Aaron were on their way to the White House after having dropped their daughters to daycare, and for whatever reason, Emily was jumped over by several colleagues who wished her a happy birthday. She was surprised, she didn't even know they knew when her birthday was, but it felt good knowing that despite the job, the building and the institution, the White House felt like another family. Yes, it was hard to work all these long hours, but they had bonded in a way that they never thought would be possible.

At lunchtime, the five senior advisers managed to leave the West Wing to go to the Italian place. They were all laughing and chatting when they started their turns of saying things about the birthday girl, just like they had done three months ago with Seth.

"Okay, I'm starting." Seth said. "My first memory with you goes back to the night of the bombing I think. I remember seeing you in the West Wing, completely lost and trying to find Kirkman. I remember that you were still calling him Tom… Something that has not happened in the last seven years or so… And I was wondering who you were, because you were so freaked out, like most of us I guess, but you were really showing it, and I actually wondered if you would make it here. What about you Lyor?"

"Oh my!" Lyor exclaimed. "My first memory of Emily Rhodes… That was my Senior year at Georgetown, you were a freshman but you were already taking 300-level classes in political science. I remember that cause on the first day of class, the professor asked which year we were, and you were, not really surprisingly, the only freshman. And everybody turned around to look at you, and you were so shy with your glasses and your ponytail, freakout out with the attention…"

The five colleagues laughed at the confession. No, Emily wasn't really shy, so imagining an 18-year-old Emily arriving at Georgetown was quite something.

"I think you've always impressed me Emily…" Kendra continued. "I don't know, my first meeting with you, I was still working for the Senate Homeland Committee, that's my very first memory of you. You were sitting right opposite me, right by Aaron, and you were just so sure of yourself… It's almost as if everything was easy for you."

"So, the total opposite of my first memory then?" Lyor teased, making them laugh.

"What about you Aaron, your first memory of the woman that became your wife…" Seth asked.

Aaron chuckled, thinking about it.

"It was when she started working for Kirkman at HUD. She was already fierce and tenacious. I think it was ten years ago maybe? It seems like a long time ago. I had started working for Langdon something like two weeks before, and I wasn't even Deputy Chief of Staff yet, I was deputy to the deputy." Aaron rolled his eyes. "And so, one day Keller was sick, so I replaced him and went with Langdon to this meeting between Richmond and Kirkman, and Emily was there. She was biting like a bulldog, and even before I could say something to her, she glanced at me with this look she has, trying to show me that she wouldn't let anyone step on her toes. And it made me laugh, because the girl didn't even know me, but she already hated me…"

"I didn't hate you!" Emily defended herself.

Aaron raised an eyebrow.

"Em… I'm sure you did. I don't know what you were thinking about me, but you didn't like me…"

"Okay, yeah. That's right…"

"What was the first word that came to your mind when you met Aaron?" Kendra asked.

"Obnoxious…" Emily admitted.

"Are you serious?" Aaron exclaimed, shocked and making their colleagues laugh.

"Well, maybe I was a little harsh, but you weren't the nicest guy on the planet with me…" Emily said.

The discussion continued like that, they were still chatting about Emily, her days at the White House, and the rest. And then, they were at the point where they were supposed to tell the stupidest thing they had done at the White House. Everyone of them taking turn, they were shaming Emily for leaking information to the press, or for arriving at work early in a morning and still hangover from the night before. And when it was Aaron's turn to speak, he shared a knowing look with Emily, they both you know what was the stupidest thing they had done in the White House, but they couldn't share it.

"Firing these staffers, when you were pregnant with Inez. I think that wasn't your smartest move…" Aaron said, finding something else to share.

"Wait, wait!" Seth exclaimed. "That's not what you wanted to say. I'm not buying it. You shared that look with Emily, you wanted to say something, you smirked, you both know what you wanted to say, but you didn't say it…"

"What? No!" Emily reacted a little too quickly.

"What makes you say that?" Aaron asked, trying to keep a good poker face.

"I know that look. I've seen you sharing that look many times in all these years. It's always when you have these inside jokes and things that only you two can get…" Seth continued.

"Oh! My! God!" Kendra suddenly exclaimed. "I know what Aaron wanted to say! Ewwww! Why did you do that?" she continued with a look of disgust.

And then, it clicked for Lyor and Seth too.

"No way… You didn't…" Seth said, shaming them.

"Ok, tell me exactly where you did that, because I do not want to sit there ever again…" Lyor continued, disgusted.

And though Aaron was really making efforts to play dumb, Emily started blushing, completely losing her composure. They knew their cover was over.

"When? Do you do that often?" Seth continued.

"And I thought that a certain former president had taught us all something…." Lyor said sarcastically, rolling his eyes.

"Lyor! Let them answer… I wanna know where I cannot sit anymore."

Aaron and Emily shared a look, wondering which one of them should tell the truth. They were so ashamed they just wanted to dig a hole and hide forever.

"It happened once. I promise it happened only once" Emily said. "It was late at night, nobody was there except for Aaron and I…"

"Where?" Seth asked again, cutting her short.

"On my desk…" she admitted, covering her face with her hand.

"I will never see that desk the same way, ever again…" Kendra said.

"So you're telling us that you persuaded Aaron to have sex, on your desk, in the West Wing, one day late at night?" Seth asked, raising an eyebrow.

Emily looked at Aaron, wanting him to help her, but he raised his hands in protestation.

"Hey! You could support me here!" she exclaimed.

"You know very well it's all your fault…" Aaron answered, leaving her to her fate.

Emily put her hand on her face, so ashamed, she didn't know what to say and it was making everybody laugh.

"We want the whole story now Em…" Seth said.

"Well, maybe not the whole story… but…" Lyor corrected.

"It was a long time ago, before we got married. And I had this fantasy, it kept popping in my head, I don't even know why. And we had this deal to stay professional in the White House, but one night, I mean it had been a very long day, so for whatever reason we had drunk a glass of scotch in my office. Aaron knew about this fantasy that I had, and so, I think we were a little tipsy, and I just convinced him to do this…"

"You're kinda embellishing the story here Em…" Aaron said.

"Thanks for throwing me under the bus…" Emily answered with a death glare.

"So, what's the real story?" Kendra asked, now curious too.

"She was sitting in her chair and I was sitting on the edge of her desk, and she literally started undressing me just like that. I didn't even have the time to react or say no. And it was at the beginning of her relation, so I mean, even if we had this deal to stay professional, when you have your girlfriend undressing you right here right now and you know it's her fantasy and you know that nobody is in the building anymore…"

"Yeah, cause you always say it's my fault, but I didn't need much to convince you…" Emily said, trying to shame him.

"Anyway" Aaron said, changing the subject while everybody was laughing. "We got very close to getting caught by the janitor, like I don't know, 15 seconds close maybe, we were finishing getting dressed when she knocked and opened the door."

The five colleagues started laughing even more.

Yes, thirty-eight wasn't really a milestone, but it definitely was a birthday Emily would not forget.


	51. The Family

Hi people. This is coming to an end. I don't know yet whether I will split my next chapter in two or not (because it's like 5k long), but it's coming to an end. So, there will be two or three more chapters, and maybe, an epilogue. Thanks to everyone sticking to it, even if you haven't been commenting. And here is the new chapter!

* * *

THE FAMILY

It was the beginning of June, Ashley and Mike had moved to Chicago, and a little boy was born two weeks ago: Jamie Daniel Rhodes. When Emily had finally received the call from her brother, a few weeks after her mom had let it slip, she had cried of pride and happiness.

But it wasn't because Kirkman's term was ending soon that work was inexistant. Emily and Aaron had been both deep into it for the past few months, and that month of June wasn't an exception. Emily's nephew was born two weeks ago, but she still had not found the time to go to Chicago meet him. It was frustrating her a lot. For a reason she couldn't really get, she had become very emotional with family things recently. Whether it was her parents, her brothers, or her daughters and husband, every time she was thinking about them, she would become nostalgic and sad. Most of these past eight years had been dedicated to the White House, and even though she had found the time to get married and start a family, she could suddenly feel all the things she had missed with them. In only a few months, Inez would turn four, Cami three, and Emily couldn't realize all the things that had happened in their lives.

In the past few years, with the loss of Aaron's parents, Emily had started holding even tighter to her family. It had made her realize how everything could fall apart very quickly, and it had made her realize how she should cherish and treasure all the precious moments with her husband, with her daughters, or with anyone close to her. So, even though it had been now months her parents had announce they would move to California, Emily was still not quite over it. As promised by Aaron, they had spent their last Christmas in Connecticut, making it possible for Emily to spend some time in her childhood home before it would be sold.

Also, Emily was thinking more and more often about what they would do after the White House. And though she knew a well-deserved break would be necessary, they were both way too young to retire. But what could they do, after holding the position they had both dreamed of? Everything would feel like downgrading, and it would probably take time for both of them to find something new. She was trying to keep her calm with all of this, trying to stay sane, knowing that they would eventually find a new job, but Aaron's behavior with all of this was kind of freaking her out: It was as if he didn't care, he wasn't afraid at all about the future, and it was really weird, because she knew he was almost as much of a control-freak as she was.

On a Tuesday afternoon, Aaron knocked at the opened door of Emily's office as she was working on a bill.

"I got that for you" he said, handing her a piece of paper.

"What is that?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"A plane ticket for Chicago, you're leaving tomorrow morning."

"What? Are you crazy?" she exclaimed, surprised.

"No, I'm not. I know you want to meet your nephew, so I thought you should go."

"But I don't have time for this, you know that. What are you gonna do without me? And who is going to take care of the girls?" she asked, worried.

Aaron had walked closer to Emily during their conversation and was now sitting on the edge of her desk.

"Em… I can deal on my own for a few days, you know I can. And I've asked around to take care of the girls while you're gone and I'm at work."

"You've asked around?"

"Yes, I asked Nadia mostly. And Seth told me he'll be around too. You know they both love seeing the girls."

"Yeah I know… But still… We're already working like crazy, how are you going to handle all of the workload on your own?"

"Honey, you'll be gone for three days… And in all the previous administrations, there was only one Chief of Staff. We both were alone at one point, need I remind you…"

"Okay… I guess you can handle this." Emily chuckled. "Thank you…"

Emily rose to kiss Aaron.

"I'd do anything for my wife, you know that."

"I love you"

So, the morning after, Aaron took Emily to the airport on his way to the White House and after having dropped the girls at daycare. It wasn't a long flight, but Emily was stressed. It was the first time she was going alone somewhere in a while, and she didn't like not having Aaron and the girls by her side. She knew it was only for three days, that they would obviously call during that time and that she would be back on Friday night, but still, it didn't feel right. Though, when Mike picked her up at the airport, all her worries faded away as she jumped in her brother's arms. She had not seen him in such a long time, she was absolutely thrilled about it. It was another thing that the past eight years had made her realize, she missed her brothers much more than she thought.

"Lil' bro!" she exclaimed.

"Don't call me like that, please…" Mike grumbled, making Emily laugh.

"How are you doing? You look exhausted."

"Well, there is a two-week-old baby at home, so yeah, pretty much… And Mom is annoying me…"

"No kidding… I'm surprised you haven't sent them back home yet…"

"They are staying in that airbnb down the block, so at least, she's not hassling me all the time…"

"No, she's gonna hassle me in the evenings instead. What wouldn't I do for my lil bro…" Emily chuckled, rolling her eyes.

"I'm sorry our apartment isn't big enough for you to stay…" Mike said.

"Hey, it's Chicago. It's alright, I know it costs a fortune. You know, Aaron and I are lucky enough because we have good jobs, we wouldn't live that close to downtown Washington otherwise…"

The apartment Mike and Ashely were renting was a nice condo not too far from downtown Chicago. It was close enough to all the means of transportations, it was not far from a park, and most of all, it was only a fifteen-minute walk from both their jobs. They had moved right at the beginning of the year, when it was freezing cold in the Windy City, and though Connecticut wasn't a warm place in winter, it had made it hard to adapt to Illinois. Thankfully, now that the days were nicer, Chicago had become a place very easy to enjoy, and they could make the most of these long walks along Lake Michigan and Navy Pier.

When Emily arrived to Mike and Ashley's apartment with her brother, almost everybody was waiting for her. Her parents were cooking lunch, and she also met Ashley's parents who had stayed around too to help the new parents adapt a little to this new life. Little Jamie was sound asleep in his bedroom, so they all chatted together around lunch. Most of the conversation was revolving around the newborn and how Ashley was recovering from the delivery, which had not been as easy as she had hoped it would. It was throwing Emily back to her own memories, especially to the day she had given birth to Inez, actually not that far from Chicago.

After lunch, Emily texted Aaron, wondering how things were going at the White House. Her husband had forbidden her to take her professional phone to Chicago, so it had stayed in the West Wing, but she still couldn't help worrying about work. Of course, he reassured her everything was fine, but she knew he would say that even if it wasn't true, so she was constantly looking at the breaking news reports in case something really bad was happening.

Emily was trying to think of an activity to avoid thinking about work when she noticed Mike was starting to be annoyed by their mom. As always, Sharon was trying to rule the house, and for once she had a supporter: Ashley's mom, Deborah, was exactly the same and they were getting along really well. So, after another insistent glance from Mike, Emily offered to take a walk down Grant Park. It was time for Jamie's nap, so they decided to take the stroller and walk along the lake. The parents had wanted to come too, but thankfully, Emily was a little more straightforward than her brother, so she advised them to go grocery shopping for dinner instead. Ashley, Mike and Emily were on their own, and Mike was really happy about it.

"Thank you sis', you saved our ass…" Mike said as they were walking.

"Ah, you're welcome. Mom was exactly the same when I gave birth to Cami. I couldn't stand her anymore…"

"Oh, I know. She is still upset that you sent her away only a week after you gave birth to Cami…"

"Is she really?"

"Yup, yesterday she told us that at least we were grateful for everything she was doing for us…"

"Oh Gosh… Why is she always like that? And I am grateful for everything she has done for me and Aaron, it's just that she doesn't know how to control herself…"

"Did you realize that my Mom is exactly the same?" Ashley asked.

"Yeah, I noticed they seemed to get along pretty well. How are you holding up?" Emily asked.

"The first few days, it was great. I mean, after being in labor for fifteen hours and then undergoing a c-section, I was perfectly fine with both of them ruling the house. But it's been more than two weeks now, I wish they could calm down a little…" Ashley answered.

"Gosh, that c-section thing was my worst nightmare. I'm so glad I didn't need it…"

"Isn't it every woman's worst nightmare?" Ashley chuckled.

"Most of them I guess. But no, remember Mike? Rachel seemed quite okay with it." Mike nodded. "Well, I mean, she was giving birth to twins, so the probability was higher anyway, I guess she had time to process everything before it actually happened. And for me, I had barely had time to process that I was actually pregnant that I was already giving birth, so it was harder too"

"I don't want to imagine what it must be like to discover everything when you are 6-month pregnant…"

"It's hell, but when you are supported and loved, you get through this, and you even manage to have another kid only a year after…" Emily laughed.

Jamie was sleeping in his stroller, the sun was out, it wasn't a day too warm. Seeing this little boy in his stroller was sending back Emily to her own memories, to the first time she and Aaron had taken a walk with Inez, to the day she had learned she was pregnant again, to that first walk outside with Inez and Cami. She was nostalgic again, and was thinking about her husband and her daughters. Emily texted Aaron quickly.

 _"_ _Thank you, it was a much needed trip to Chicago. Love you."_

They spent Emily's second day in Chicago just walking around and spending family time. It was Mike's day off, so they were all together. It was nice, it was needed. And then, for Emily's last day in the Windy City, even though she was still feeling nostalgic, she decided to make the most of it and visit a little before she would go home in the evening. She was hoping that doing something would lighten her mood and make her forget that her days off were already almost over, so with Sharon and Peter, they ended up on the skydeck of Sears Tower. It was another beautiful sunny day, so the view over the city and Lake Michigan was absolutely stunning. They were in awe with it, and Emily enjoyed being a tourist like another. She felt happy, wished she had taken the girls with her, and promised herself they would all come back together when they would be out of the White House.

But then, as they were chatting in the streets of Chicago, Sharon started a conversation that didn't please Emily much.

"Emily darling, we know you're not going to take it too well, but… we have to tell you, the house is sold." Sharon said.

"What?" Emily stopped in her walk and looked at her parents. "I didn't even know it was already on the market…"

Emily could already feel herself getting worked up.

"It was real quick, it took us a long time to finally do it, but it was sold in three weeks…" Peter said, trying to temper things.

"Three weeks? And in three weeks you didn't think of telling me? Especially since we called a couple of times with Jamie's birth…" Emily asked, raising her voice.

"Because we knew you would take it that way… I don't know what is going on with you recently, but everything family related is getting you worked up…" Sharon said.

"Well, maybe because everything is falling apart? Don't you think? I have a job that prevents me from seeing my daughters more than an hour a day, and if it's an hour I'm lucky. I have a husband to whom I speak more about work than anything else. I have parents that decided to move all the way to California and sell my childhood home. I have a big brother living in Boston, having two girls that I see less than once a year, even though Michaela is actually my goddaughter. And I have a little brother who just became a Dad but that I cannot support in this big step because I live miles away from him. That is just for my side of the family. And let me just remind you that Aaron lost both his parents in just one year, that his brother lives 2000 miles from Washington, that he hasn't seen his uncles or aunts since he last went to Mexico, meaning two years ago, and that the other side of his family is such a piece of crap that they didn't even come to the funerals of his parents. So yes, I am getting worked up with everything family related!"

"Emi…"

"Don't Emily me Mom!" I know I am overreacting, I know that's what you want to say, because Aaron told me many times too. But it doesn't mean it's any easier. I already feel guilty enough for not having spend more time with you and everybody around me in the past eight years, so don't say anything."

Emily had just yelled at her parents in the middle of a crowded street of Chicago. Before her mom or her dad could say anything else, she walked away, letting her parents stunned in the middle of Michigan Avenue. She walked into the first coffee shop she could find, ordered a large cup of the dark blend that she loved so much, and exited to find an empty bench in the park overlooking the lake. As the burning beverage was going down her throat, she closed her eyes to enjoy the light breeze of fresh air. She didn't even feel like crying, which was surprising since she had cried a lot recently, and for less than that. Trying to calm herself, she was thinking about everything, and wondering why all of this was making her so stressed and annoyed. Rewinding all her memories, she realized that all of this started after she and Aaron talked about a possible third baby. But it was weird, because the idea had not really sticked in her mind, she had not thought about it for a while. She was happy with her two beautiful daughters and her amazing husband, and though she could imagine herself with a little baby one day in the near future, it was definitely not one of her priorities. Or maybe it had become one of her priorities…

Emily felt like calling her husband, wanting to unwind and talk about that sudden revelation. But she knew it was a face-to-face conversation, so it's only when she landed in Washington, a little after 10 p.m. that evening and when she was back to their apartment with him, that she finally talked. They were lying in bed, cuddling before falling asleep.

"Do you still want that third baby?" she asked.

He looked down at her, a bit surprised with that sudden question.

"Huh, yeah. But I thought we wanted to wait the end of Kirkman's mandate, didn't we?" Aaron answered.

"Yeah, but I don't know if I want to wait anymore."

"What made you change your mind?"

"Seeing Mike and Ashley with Jamie I think. And also that conversation we had on our way back from Nantucket last year. And also yelling at my parents for nothing this afternoon…" Emily rolled her eyes. "I think that Nantucket is when I started getting so worked up with everything family related…"

"Well, you have indeed been quite moody these past few months." Aaron assessed.

"So, what do you think?"

"I mean, we're out of the White House in seven months, so anyway, you wouldn't give birth before the end of Kirkman's mandate. But, you're still Chief of Staff for the next seven months, it's a hard job, and I thought you wanted a chill pregnancy, not working like crazy all day long…"

"Well, in the end, it wasn't that bad with Cami… I can't really say the same for Inez, but you get why…"

"You know what? I think we should just stop contraception, and if it comes next month, then it's fine, if it comes later, it's fine too. I really want that third baby too, but I don't want us to focus so much on it that we cannot help ourselves thinking about it every month and be disappointed every month when you have your period… Because I know us, and I know that it's gonna be our main conversation once we decide to try."

"You know us so well…"

"That's why we are married." Aaron chuckled.

Emily smiled and rose a bit to kiss her husband. Yeah, they were ready to their family to get bigger.


	52. The Resignation

Hey there. Here is the second to last chapter. This is the longest chapter I've written, I'm sorry if it's a little too long (5k!) but I didn't want to cut it in two, it didn't feel logical to cut it, so here it is.  
I'll come back with one more chapter soon, and maybe an epilogue, but that it still up for debate. I cannot decide whether an epilogue would be needed or not.  
Hope you'll like it!

* * *

THE RESIGNATION

It was the end of October, and the end of an era. The election was in two weeks, and it was in everybody's mind. In two weeks, they would know who would succeed Tom Kirkman, they would start packing, they would start the transition between the two teams. For now, things were looking good for the Democrats, but the margin between them and the Republicans was really small. Everybody was trying to do their bests to help Eleanor Darby, and even though Tom Kirkman had been an Independent for a long time, he had run for the Democrats four years ago, so he was returning the favor and devoted to help them. He wasn't sure he would stay Democrat for long, he would probably become an Independent again pretty quickly after the end of his mandate, but for now, he wanted to help them the way they had helped him all over these years. So, even though it wasn't their campaign, Tom Kirkman's staff was running here and there to help.

Thankfully though, today had been a pretty quiet day, all of the President's staff was in Washington, it was business as usual. TVs were on, they were keeping an eye on the different news channels in case they were missing something. It was these times of uncertainties during when anything could happen at any time, and they were on high alert. The third and last presidential debate was in the evening. At first, they had planned to stay all together at the White House to watch it, but Emily and Aaron were not too keen on having a babysitter taking care of the girls. They knew they could, they had sometimes needed one and they knew she would be more than happy to take care of the girls and be paid for that, but they wanted to stay with their daughters. So instead, they had invited everybody in their apartment to watch the debate. Both Seth and Kendra had accepted the invitation, but Lyor had declined, giving one pathetic excuse of not wanting to be around kids. They had all laughed, they were always amazed at how he could surprise them, even after seven years working together. They all knew the truth was that he was an introvert, and he just wanted to be alone to watch this debate. Tom Kirkman had declined too, he wanted to watch the debate with his wife and he didn't want to bother his security detail for the evening.

The four staffers were eating pizzas together, chatting and laughing with Inez and Cami who wouldn't stop growing up. They had celebrated their fourth and third birthdays at the beginning of the month.

"Uncle Seth?" Inez asked as she was coming toward him.

"Yes little one?" he answered.

"I'm four. I'm the big one here…" Inez explained, rolling her eyes and making everybody laugh.

"Sorry…" Seth apologized, still laughing. "What did you want?"

"Why isn't Auntie Vic here?"

Seth cringed a little, not knowing what to answer. Vic —short for Victoria— was Seth's girlfriend, or, for now, ex-girlfriend. They had been together for more than two years, but had recently broken things off after a fight over kids. Seth desperately wanted kids, he felt he was getting older and it was time for him to have kids, but Victoria was not ready. She was eight years younger than him and she wanted to concentrate on her career. He could get why though, she was still young, and she was destined to do great things. She was currently working for the Democratic candidate, so she was hoping to be a senior staffer for Eleanor Darby in January if she was winning the election.

"Auntie Vic wasn't feeling well tonight…" Emily answered, quickly changing the subject.

"Oh… Okay." Inez shrugged and left the room.

"Well, that was easy…" Seth said, surprised Inez gave up that easily.

"Sorry… How are things going by the way?" Emily asked.

"Well, she's still staying at her best friend's, so… not really good. I mean, I know she is busy and everything, I'm sure she's at the debate actually… But, I don't even know where we are in this anymore."

"You haven't really broken things off, have you?" Kendra asked.

"No, I mean I don't think so. Her things are still at home, I know she came at one point when I wasn't there cause I noticed that some clothes were missing, but she hasn't moved out or anything."

"Well, it's not to make you feel worse, but I doubt she will come back before the election. She probably doesn't even have the time to think about all of this right now…" Emily continued.

"Yeah, I know. But that's what bothers me the most actually. She should come home and be able to vent after hard days like that, but instead she is just going to her best friend's?" Seth said, saddened.

"Hey, don't worry. Things are gonna get better. It's just a hard time." Kendra said, putting a hand on her friend's shoulder.

"Should we move to the living room? It's starting soon, we're gonna put the girls in bed and you can pick the channel." Aaron said, changing the conversation.

"Can we choose Fox News?" Seth laughed.

"This channel doesn't exist in our home…" Aaron joked, laughing too.

Aaron and Emily stood up, both walking toward the bedrooms to put the girls in bed. They were almost grown-ups now, they didn't really need their parents behind them all the time, but still, Aaron and Emily were checking that they were brushing their teeth properly, and they were reading them a story, tucking them in. As always, Aaron and Emily were taking turn, so Aaron took care of Inez, and Emily of Cami, and then they switched to kiss them goodnight. It didn't take very long, but when they were done and the girls were finally asleep, the debate had already started.

They joined Seth and Kendra who had found a place on the couch. They started debating, rolling their eyes to stupid comments, cheering to great ones, and yelling to lies. They were all very passionate about the debate. And then, in the middle of it, Jack Bowman, the Republican candidate said something:

 _"_ _And you believe that Tom Kirkman is honest, right?" he said._

 _"_ _Yes, Tom Kirkman is a decent and honest man, he always does what is right, and never lies to the American people" Eleanor Darby argued._

 _"_ _Always does the right thing? So how do you explain that he never fired his co-Chief of Staff, Aaron Shore, even though he was arrested for DUI more than two years ago?"_

The four staffers choked and looked at each other.

"Fuck." was all that came out of Seth's mouth.

Suddenly, their phones were ringing, Lyor on a line, Tom Kirkman on the other, and Darby's chief advisor on another one. Aaron was at a loss for words, Emily's heart was pounding, and Kendra and Seth didn't know what to do. They were all completely stunned, they had never thought it would ever come back up to the surface, and even less in this decisive electoral campaign. Suddenly, the chill evening wasn't chill anymore, and they were all ready to go back to the White House. Aaron called Nadia for a last minute babysitting. She was watching the debate too and wasn't really surprised by the call, so she rushed to the Shores' apartment with her boyfriend to take care of the girls.

It was a crisis meeting in the Oval Office. Everybody was there, and Darby's advisers were on speaker to talk with them.

"Do you think this could blow over?" Tom Kirkman asked.

"So, it's true?" one of the advisers said on the phone.

"Yes, it is true…" Aaron answered.

"We are two weeks away from the election, the polls will suffer a lot from this…" another staffer said.

"How can the polls suffer from this?" Emily asked, already irritated. "Aaron isn't even part of Darby's staff!"

"But Darby is Vice-President. So nobody will believe that she didn't know…" Lyor continued.

"But it's true. She didn't know. Only a handful of us knew. How did Bowman get the info by the way?" Emily continued.

"There was a rumor last year that he was involved with Tiffany Gimble…" Seth admitted.

"What? Her again?" Emily was the most irritated.

"So, I guess we should prepare a statement?" Tom Kirkman asked.

"Yes. That is the first thing to do, a statement from Aaron, explaining the whys and the hows." a staffer said.

"First?" Tom Kirkman raised an eyebrow. "What is the second then?"

"Resigning…" Aaron said.

Protests filled the room. Nobody was listening to anyone anymore.

"No way you are resigning!" Emily exclaimed.

"You know it is the only solution…" Aaron continued.

"He is right." Lyor said.

"We are not there yet." Tom Kirkman said, trying to temper things.

The discussion was over. Tom Kirkman didn't want Aaron to resign, Emily didn't want it either. Only Lyor was approving of Aaron's sayings, of course, he had always been the one worrying about the polls. Seth was asked to write a statement with Aaron, and they spent most of the night debating what they should say or not and how to handle things. Emily went back home to free Nadia and her boyfriend, and when she was alone in front of the mirror, removing her make-up, she started crying. No, she didn't want Aaron to resign, this couldn't happen. She wasn't strong enough to spend the last three months of the presidency alone at the White House, it had already been too hard when he had been on sick leave for six months. She didn't want Aaron to finish his job at the White House on such terms, and she was afraid he would relapse. Aaron was strong, she knew her husband more than anyone, she knew he was, but how would he handle being alone at home for the next three months? And that DIU would definitely complicate things for Aaron to find a new job. He didn't even know yet what he wanted to do after the White House, but things were suddenly darkening.

Emily lied down in bed, exhausted but unable to find her sleep. Aaron wasn't back home yet, he was still working with Seth on that statement, and she couldn't help thinking about everything. Once again, she was starting to wonder what she could have done to prevent this DUI, and she was hating herself again for what had happened. Her mind was racing.

It's only around three in the morning that she heard the door opening, and she rose from the bed to go see her husband.

"You're not sleeping?" he asked, when he saw her appearing at the doorway.

"What do you think… I can't." she answered.

Aaron sighed and walked toward her. He hugged her tight, closing his eyes.

"What are we gonna do? I don't want you to resign…" she said, still nestled against him.

"You heard Kirkman. Resignation is off the table for now. So we'll see. The statement will be distributed first thing in the morning, and we'll see from then." Aaron answered, trying to reassure her.

"It won't be enough…" Emily sighed.

"We'll do everything we can. Nobody wants me to resign, and you know I don't want it either…"

"Except Lyor…" Emily rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, but Lyor is right. You know that Em…"

"Still, I don't want you to resign. What am I gonna do, alone for three months? And what are you gonna do, alone in this apartment for three months?"

Emily started sniffing, tears were threatening to fall down her cheeks again. Aaron released his embrace and put his hand under her chin.

"Look at me Em… Whatever happens, we'll be fine. Both of us. Three months is nothing. You can run the White House for three months on your own. You've done that for years before I came back on the job."

"And what about you?" she asked, worried.

"I'll be fine. I'm not gonna start drinking again, I am way past that, if that's what worries you. And I'll find a new job anyway… And I'll take care of the girls. I'll find things to do, I promise." he tried to reassure her.

They went to bed, entangled and holding each other, but it took them hours to fall asleep. They just couldn't. Emily was stressed, thinking about everything, and angry at the world. She was angry at Tiffany Gimble mostly, and at Jack Bowman. She was angry at herself, not to have been able to protect her husband better. And she was just scared about the next three months. She had other things on her mind, other things to do, other thing to think about. It was just too much.

On the other side of the bed, Aaron was surprisingly calm. Yes, that was true, he didn't want to resign, he didn't want to leave the White House, not that close to the end. But in a way, he could have felt it coming. Deep inside, he didn't even know how he had been able to go back to work after that incident, how his colleagues had managed to kill the story, and he had truly been grateful that his friends had helped him out in this dark period. Still, he couldn't sleep. He couldn't help but wonder whether tomorrow would be his last day at the White House, or if it would be in two days, or maybe three. He knew it would be three very hard last months for his wife, and he was more worried for her than for him. It's only two hours before waking up that he finally fell asleep.

When Aaron arrived at work in the morning after two hours of sleep, people were staring. Everywhere he would walk, someone would look at him, sometimes with shock, sometimes with despise. Aaron was trying to do his best to ignore them, but sometimes he just wanted to tell them to go get lost. As soon as he arrived, he went to Seth's office to know more about the course of action.

"The statement was distributed half an hour ago, I have no clue what it will do… But news channel are on a loop with this. Republicans are going on TV one after the other to tell that it's the proof Kirkman should never have been President and that we cannot do the same mistake twice by electing Darby, and the after-debate polls this morning weren't good." Seth said, sitting on his chair.

"Well, my resignation letter is ready, I guess I'll hand it to Kirkman at the end of the day…" Aaron said, sitting opposite Seth.

"Man, don't say things like that. We'll do everything we can for this to blow over. And Emily is right, you're not even in Darby's team, I don't know why it should change anything." Seth continued, annoyed.

"You know Lyor is right." Aaron argued.

"We don't know that yet. We'll see tonight how it goes with the next polls…"

Hour after hour, they were following the aftermath of Bowman's revelation. Emily had arrived at work after dropping the girls to daycare, and she was as exhausted as Aaron. She had barely slept either, coffee wasn't dark enough to keep her awake, and the knot in her stomach wouldn't leave her. In the early afternoon, they got the first after-statement polls. It still wasn't looking good, and what was annoying them the most is that Democrats were not rushing to support them. Tom Kirkman had done everything for them, but now that his team was in turmoil, they were not there to help. So, instead of advancing the last few bills on his agenda, Tom Kirkman himself spent the day on the phone, yelling at Congressmen who didn't want to stick their necks out. He didn't want his co-Chief of Staff to resign, he didn't care about the polls, but he knew that if by the end of the day, things were still not looking good, he wouldn't be able to hold Aaron back.

"Seth!" Emily exclaimed, entering her colleague's office in the afternoon.

"Yeah?" Seth raised an eyebrow.

"Do you think that Aaron giving an exclusive interview would work?" she asked.

"I don't know. Usually Chiefs of Staff don't go in front of the cameras for these kind of issues… And I don't think Aaron's DUI is the problem, but more that Kirkman didn't fire him…"

Emily sighed and sat in a chair.

"Tiffany Gimble better not cross my path in the next few months, cause that wouldn't go well for her…" she grumbled.

"Well, it's a good thing she doesn't work here anymore…" Seth answered, rolling his eyes.

"What if Kirkman was making a statement?"

"Maybe he could address the press? I have my daily briefing in an hour. It's gonna be hell…"

"Yeah! That would be a good idea." Emily exclaimed. "You'll be questioned about that anyway, so Kirkman could just appear and say a few words."

"Let me talk to him, I'll see what we can do."

An hour later, as planned with the President, Tom Kirkman popped in the White House Press Briefing Room, while Seth was answering the questions of unchained journalists. The President reaffirmed his support to Aaron, saying that he would never fire him for something like that. He also reaffirmed that Eleanor Darby didn't know about it, nor her campaign staff, but he knew that this one was hard to swallow.

"Life can be hard sometimes" he said. "You cannot throw someone under the bus just because of one mistake."

Surprisingly, it's only after the President took a stand publicly that Democrats started supporting Aaron, but the press was still lashing out a them for the silence. So, when the evening came, and the latest polls were out, Aaron walked into the Oval Office to talk to the President.

"Aaron, I know what you want to say and what you want to do…" Tom Kirkman started.

"Mr. President, you now there isn't any other solution. Eleanor Darby is still going down in the polls… She cannot lose this election just because of me." Aaron argued.

"Please, stay a couple more days. Maybe this will get better. We could plan an interview tomorrow." Tom said.

"And tell what? That my mother died of cancer, my father committed suicide and that it triggered a drinking problem with me? But that now I am fine and everything is back to normal? You know this will not work, it could even make things worse…"

"We should talk to Lyor and Seth about that tomorrow. Go back home to Emily and your girls, get a good night sleep, and we'll figure things out…"

"Do you really believe it could change things? Because honestly, I don't. And believe me when I say I don't want to resign, but I think it's the only thing that could help the Democrats…"

"If you want me to be honest, Aaron, I think the damage is done, and whether you are resigning or not wouldn't change anything…" Tom Kirkman confessed.

Tom Kirkman was a stubborn man, that was sure. So, after offering Aaron a glass of scotch, he sent his staffer home without accepting his resignation. Inez and Camila were obviously already asleep, and Emily was just waiting for him in the living room, not really knowing whether he had actually resigned or not.

"Kirkman didn't let me resign…" Aaron started.

Emily sighed, relieved. Aaron walked to his wife and sat on the couch next to her, cuddling her.

"Em… It's not because I didn't resign tonight that I won't tomorrow."

"I know… But I still don't want you to."

"I made a deal with Kirkman. If the polls are not back up tomorrow, he has to let me go…"

Emily started sniffing, tears threatening to fall down her cheeks.

"Why is life so unfair sometimes?" she asked.

"Cause you think life is unfair?"

"Yeah, you haven't done anything to deserve that."

"I did get arrested for DUI…" he stated.

"And so what? It was a hard time for you, it doesn't mean you are a bad Chief of Staff…"

"But you know we have to be perfect in this world…"

There was a pause.

"I cannot do this without you. If you're resigning, I am too." she said.

"No Emily, you're not resigning because I am. You are stronger than you think, you can do this without me. It's only three months…"

"But three months is a long time…"

"Emily, look at me. I refuse that you resign because of me. I know it will be hard for you, but I know you can do this…"

There was another pause, as if Emily was trying to find the best way to say what she would say next.

"I have to tell you something…" Emily suddenly said.

"Okay?" Aaron answered, unsure of what was to come.

"I don't know yet, because I wanted to do the test with you, and I realized it two days ago and then everything happened… But I think I might be pregnant…"

"Really?"

"Yeah… I did the math, and I should have had my period last week…I completely forgot with everything that happened at work, and it crossed my mind a couple of days ago."

Aaron grinned. His eyes were shinning, and even though they didn't know for sure yet, he could already imagine it.

"Hey, slow down. It might just be a false alarm, but yeah."

"When do you want to do that test?"

"Now? I bought one a few months ago when we decided to stop contraception…"

"Okay then. I'll wait for you. I mean… I don't think you need me to pee on a stick…" Aaron chuckled.

Emily laughed, slapped her husband's shoulder gently and stood up. She sighed.

"Are we really doing this?" she asked.

"Well, at least we need to find out. We knew it would happen eventually when we decided it…"

"Yeah… But with you potentially resigning, isn't it the worst timing ever?"

"It's not because I won't be at the White House that you won't be supported. Everybody else will still be there for you. And you know Kirkman will promote Leane to co-Chief of Staff. Or Matt, but most probably Leane I would say… No matter what, Kirkman will not let you deal with all of this on your own."

Emily sighed again.

"Okay, let's do this."

Aaron kissed his wife's hand and she left for the bathroom. Emily was stressed, she knew she wanted that baby, but it suddenly didn't feel right. It suddenly didn't feel like the right time. She took the test out of the cupboard where she was hiding it, and sighed one more time before doing it. Aaron, for his part, was just waiting for the answer. He knew that it wasn't the perfect timing, not the timing they had hoped for, but he also knew they could do it. If ever she was pregnant, they could make this work. He decided to go make some tea for both of them while his wife was in the bathroom, and when she came back, the test in her hand, they sat together on the couch waiting for the time to pass. They didn't say a word.

"I think it's time…" she said after a few minutes.

They looked at each other in the eyes, holding hands. Emily took the test that she had put on the coffee table, not daring to look at it.

 _Pregnant_

Emily and Aaron had looked down at the test, and an instant grin had formed on their faces. Emily jumped in Aaron's arms, they hugged each other tight. Emily started crying, happiness and fear mixing in her heart. Aaron rubbed her back, excited about it, but knowing he needed to reassure his wife about everything.

"We can make this work." he said softly.

"Can we?" she asked.

Aaron released his embrace to look at Emily in the eyes.

"Yes, we can. I am resigning tomorrow, but you are not alone. It doesn't mean you are alone. You have plenty of people around you at the White House to help you during the next three months."

"So, this is decided, you are resigning tomorrow?"

"You know I won't have the choice… But don't think about this right now. You're pregnant, we are going to be parents again, that's all that matters."

Emily nodded and kissed Aaron. Yes, they could make this work. Life was always full of surprises, and she realized that even if it wasn't the perfect timing, Aaron would always be by her side, and together they could get through anything. The thought of Inez and Cami both being big sisters soon made her smile, and as they went to bed together, they fell asleep entangled, Aaron putting his hand on Emily's still flat belly, already fiercely protective of this little thing growing.

The day after, as Aaron had imagined, the polls didn't go up. Kirkman offered again to do that interview, but neither Seth nor Lyor thought it was a good idea, and truth was, Aaron wasn't sure about it either. He wanted to defend himself, but he didn't think it was worth spilling his private life in public. Everybody already knew it had happened after the death of his parents, so Aaron didn't feel like it was necessary to enlarge on the subject. In a way, Emily didn't agree with him, of course, she wanted to do everything to save her husband's job, but in the meantime, she could understand why he didn't want to, it was his private life, their private life, and she knew he was right about wanting to protect it.

So, with the evening coming, Aaron started packing his things, and started saying his goodbyes. He walked to Seth's office, where Kendra was too.

"I need a favor…" he asked, as he closed the door and sat on a chair next to Kendra.

"Anything." Seth answered.

"It's way too early to say this to the entire world, we found out yesterday, so I trust you to keep it for yourself. But Emily is pregnant." Seth and Kendra smiled. "So please, take care of her while I'm away. I know she's going to tire herself out, and we all know she is a control-freak, she will be stressed. Don't hesitate to tell her it take it easy, and to send her back home when she needs to."

"For sure we will. Congratulations!" Kendra said, putting her hand on her friend's shoulder.

"Man… How can you find the time to make three kids in five years with this job. Gosh, you impress me…" Seth joked. "Congratulations!"

"Thank you."

"So, is this really over?" Seth asked.

"Yup, that mistake finally got me to resign. It's so stupid to resign three months before the end, but I don't want Darby to lose the election because of this. If she loses the election, it won't be my fault." Aaron answered.

"As much as I am sad to see you leave, I think you made the right decision." Kendra said. "If ever she loses the election, you won't be able to hate yourself for that."

Aaron and Seth agreed. And then, the soon-to-be former Chief of Staff left the Seth's office, and finished packing. It was already 5 p.m. and he knew he needed to pick up the girls from daycare. So he went back to his office, checked that everything was in order, took the last things he had left out and put them in a box. Emily appeared at the doorway of their offices, tears already threatening to fall down her cheeks.

"What are you stealing?" Emily asked, trying to laugh even if she wasn't in the mood.

"Nothing, I trust you to do it for me on January 20th…" he answered.

"Lowest crook in the history of the White House…." she chuckled, shaking her head.

"We can share the title if you don't bring me back anything in January." Aaron smiled.

"So it's over? Really over?" Emily asked.

"Yeah, I just have to hand my letter to Kirkman. I'm doing it now, then I hand back my phone, my credentials, sign all the papers, and it's over."

"I'll come pick up the girls with you. Leane and Matt can handle everything for tonight…" Emily stated.

"Sure. You wanna come with me in Kirkman's office?" he asked.

"No, it's your time, it's your talk."

"Okay then. I'll be back soon."

Aaron walked to Emily to kiss her quickly and, letter in hand, went to Kirkman's office. He knocked and entered. The President was waiting for him, he knew Aaron would come.

"So, this is it?" Tom Kirkman asked.

"I'm afraid so, Sir." Aaron answered, handing him his letter of resignation. "We made a deal, you cannot refuse it tonight."

"I am taking it because I am a man of honor and I stick to what I said, but this is not gladly that I am taking it."

"Thank you Sir, for these past eight years. It wasn't always easy, but you've taught me many things, you made me have faith in politics in Washington. You made me believe that politics can be more than politics. I will never forget these years."

"Thank you Aaron." Kirkman insisted. "You were the first one here on that terrible night, and even though you didn't know me, you sticked around and you've been loyal to the end. You are a great man Aaron, don't ever forget that. I really wish you could have stayed longer."

They continued their talk for a little more, and then, shaking the President's hand, Aaron left the Oval Office. He went back to his office where Emily was waiting for him, took that box on his desk and turned back to look at this room one last time as he was leaving it. He had spent so much time in here, he couldn't believe this was over. His heart was heavy, but deep inside, Tom Kirkman's words were resonating in his head. It was the end, it was officially over.


	53. The New Start

**This is it, this is officially the last chapter of this story. I'm sorry it took so long to post it, work has been crazy recently, I don't even have time to answer texts, let alone to open my computer to publish this...**  
 **It's been quite a ride since I started this. I never thought I would carry this story to 53 chapters and more than 120k words. I started writing it 9 months ago, and it's finally over. It took a lot of time, but I have to say I'm quite proud I've managed to finish it. It's the first time I finish writing a multi-chapter story in English. I thank all of you who wrote comments, followed, liked, or even just read the story. I hope you liked it, I hope it was good, even if the storyline is just basic.**  
 **I will come back with an epilogue, hopefully in the next couple of weeks, maybe three (when I'm done with my summer job). So, stick to it, it's not quite over yet.**

 **Again, THANK YOU. And with this, here is the last chapter.**

* * *

THE NEW START

Two and a half months ago, Eleanor Darby had won the election, not without fear. Even after Aaron's resignation, polls had continued going down, and it's only late in the evening —early in the morning— that they had had confirmation of her victory. The margin had been much smaller than what they had hoped, and they had been very thankful that the election had not happened two weeks later, they would probably have lost the election otherwise. The continuous decrease in the polls had made Emily very angry. In her mind, Aaron's resignation had not been of any use, and she was extremely annoyed that her husband had been pushed out of the White House for nothing. At one point, she had even thought about asking Tom Kirkman to hire Aaron back, but she knew it wasn't something he could or should do. The former co-Chief of Staff had talked some sense in his wife's mind, and after that, she had more or less been in peace with the situation.

As Aaron had imagined, Leane had been promoted to co-Chief of Staff, and Emily had been very grateful for that. Of course, it had been a little complicated at the beginning, because Leane had continued to act as a deputy with Emily, asking her how or what to do. It's only in the beginning of December, when Emily ended up on sick leave for two weeks and Aaron had taken away her professional phone, that Leane finally fully took in her role of Chief of Staff, and she had done it perfectly.

Cause yes, Emily had spent the first two weeks of December on sick leave. Even after her pregnancy had been confirmed by her doctor a few days after Aaron's resignation, she had run here and there non-stop during November. Not having her husband, her rock, to back her up all the time at the White House anymore had been highly stressful for her, and even Seth and Kendra telling her to take things slow had not been proved efficient. So, after overworking for weeks, Emily had ended up fainting in the middle of Seth's office one day. She had been taken to the hospital, and Aaron had rushed there, worried something serious had happened. They had taken her blood pressure and it had been revealed it was too high, so she had been sent home with a two-week sick leave and strict instructions to take it slow if she wanted her pregnancy to reach full term. This had been quite of a shock for Emily as it had thrown her back to the time she had miscarried. But Emily was not a passive person, so after a few days spent at home resting, she had wanted to work from her couch, and only her husband hiding her phone and forcing her to rest more had prevented her from working. She was really grateful Aaron was at home, because she knew she wouldn't have listened to the doctor's advice if she had been alone in this apartment. But in the meantime, it had been very hard for her not to do anything, knowing that she had things to do, and she had been moody most of her time on sick leave.

The first few weeks of Aaron's unemployment had been pretty enjoyable for him. Even if he was a morning person, not having to wake up at four or five in the morning anymore was a real gift for him. He finally had time to relax, watch TV, take care of his daughters and wife. He had started boxing again, and could finally run more than half an hour every day. He was very attentive and was often cooking for his wife, and would enjoy spending days with his girls, taking them to daycare later than usual, and picking them up earlier than usual. He was still taking them over there because he knew that they needed to keep their rhythm and that it was good for the girls to spend time with kids their ages, but sometimes he couldn't help wondering why he was taking them to daycare.

These three months had been an opportunity for Aaron to plan their well-deserved holidays. Of course, Emily's pregnancy had changed a bit the plan: she needed to be in Washington for appointments and they knew she wouldn't fly too far from home in the last few months of her pregnancy. Since Emily was due at the end of June, they had decided to stay around Washington past the month of April. Therefore, they had planned their honeymoon for the last ten days of March, hoping it would be sunny and warm enough in Paris and in the South of France to enjoy it. Emily's parents would come to Washington to take care of the girls during their absence, but before that, they would head down to Mexico with Michaela and Emma during the girls' spring break. They would also spend a couple of weeks in California in February, as Sharon and Peter had finally moved there. For their visit to Chicago and Boston, they had decided to push that back for later, except if Emily was feeling fine enough to go there in May, but they had decided not to plan it too much in advance.

They had also been an opportunity for Aaron to prepare the bedroom for the new baby. They knew it was too early for that, way too early, but since Aaron didn't know what to do, he had started redecorating the room and painting things, as it used to be the guest bedroom. They had not bought anything yet, and especially since they knew they would reuse Inez and Camila's furniture, but at least the room was ready for its new purpose. Emily had not been extremely comfortable with that, especially after having fainted in early December. It had reminded her that a miscarriage could still happen, and since she had been through that before, it had suddenly scared her to see Aaron preparing everything for a baby that might not even see the light of day. They had even fought over this. Aaron could definitely understand why Emily didn't want to get too excited about this pregnancy, but for whatever reason, he had faith this pregnancy would be carried to the end and he had tried to reassure her.

Lastly, Aaron had started thinking about where he could work and what he could do in a few months. He didn't quite want to work again just yet, he wanted to spend time with his wife first, but he knew it would come one day where they would both need to work. He had started thinking about it a few weeks after leaving the White House: he had made some calls, testing the waters to see how people in Washington had reacted to the revelation of his DUI, but thankfully, no one really seemed to hold it against him. He knew Kirkman had only said good things about him all around Washington, so it would be easier to find a job, but for now, he wasn't quite sure what he wanted to do. Politics for politics weren't interesting him anymore, he could feel he had explored all his options in Washington, and nothing seemed just good enough for someone who had been the White House Chief of Staff for so long. But he could see himself working in some sort of international organization, politics for a purpose he would usually say, diplomacy. Something he had loved in the three years he had been the National Security Adviser.

But here they were, they had made it to January 20th. After eight years, it was finally over.

The day before, Emily had packed her office. She planned on picking up her stuff later on Inauguration Day, but she had put everything in a box. Not wanting the title of lowest crook in the history of the White House, Emily had longly thought of what she could take but that wouldn't be too noticeable, and she had found an old copy of her favorite novel, _The Great Gatsby_ , on a shelf in her office. It had amazed her that she had never noticed it before, but what had amazed her even more was the annotations in it. She wasn't even sure who it had belonged to, probably a former Chief of Staff she thought, but she had found that so fascinating that she wanted to take the time to read it again.

She had also pinched a leather notepad holder. It had belonged to the White House, but it was much more than just a notepad holder for Aaron and Emily: it had a little secret slot in it that only the duo knew about. When they had started dating, they had started putting little messages in this slot, like teenagers that would send each other secret messages. "You can do this." "You look beautiful today." "Stay calm, it's not worth it." "Dinner? Tonight, 9 p.m." This notepad holder had become the only one they would use to share files and information going from the Chief of Staff's office to the National Security Adviser's office, and even after Aaron had become the co-Chief of Staff, they had continued to use it sometimes when their days would be too busy to really have a break just the two of them.

Two months ago, when Aaron had finally unpacked the box he had brought back from the White House, he had discovered that Emily had added something in it while he was talking to Kirkman. He had smiled when he had found that bottle of tequila, he could clearly remember that it was a gift from the Mexican President during the state visit at the White House two years ago. It had surprised him though, that she had taken that home. As it was rare they were allowed to keep things, the President had decided that all the Senior staffers would drink it together one evening after a tough day. It was only because it was a perishable item, though Aaron knew very well that it could be kept almost forever before it would go bad. There had been a whole process with different offices and the National Archives before it had been handed back to the President.

"Why did you put that in my box?" he asked when she came home that night.

"Because I know it was important for you. And since we had been authorized to keep it, I thought it was better home than sitting in that office."

"I thought Kirkman wanted us to drink it all together one night?"

"Yeah, but he changed his mind the night before you resigned. He told me to give it to you."

"Ha, doesn't even surprise me from him…" Aaron chuckled. "I don't know if I'll drink it though."

"We'll make sure to open it one day when there will be enough people so you can get only one shot. You won't be tempted by another one…"

"Honestly Em, I'm fine."

"I know you are. Otherwise I wouldn't have brought that bottle back home. But I'm just telling…"

Aaron had kissed Emily, happy that she was always so thoughtful about everything. She truly was the most amazing woman on Earth.

Unfortunately, they had not found the time to open it yet, but they were hopeful to do it as soon as Emily could drink alcohol again. And now here they were, on what was shaping to be a very busy day for the Chief of Staff: January 20th. Emily had woken up even earlier than usual, and was ready to go to work by 6 a.m.

"When are you coming over?" she asked her husband.

"I'll be there around ten, does that sound good to you?" he answered, still lying in their bed.

"Yeah, sure. Text me, I'll wait for you at the entrance, or I'll find someone to sneak you in." Emily chuckled.

Aaron had been invited by the President to the ceremony, even if he wasn't part of the administration anymore. It had been a little weird for him, he didn't really know why he should deserve that honor, and he was perfectly fine with watching it on TV, but now that it was the day, he could definitely say that he was proud to be a part of it. Even if his adventure at the White House had ended almost three months ago, he had been in it for most of Kirkman's two mandates, and this was the end of an era for him too.

So, after taking the girls to daycare, Aaron came back home to change into a suit. He had not worn any in the past three months, and it felt weird to look at himself in the mirror. He left their apartment, not forgetting his ID now that he didn't have White House credentials anymore, even if he knew everybody would recognize him over there. He had gone there a couple of times in the past two months, mostly to go see his former colleagues —friends— and see how his wife was doing, and every time it had felt strange to wear a visitor pass.

When he arrived there, it was Seth who welcomed him.

"Hey man, what are you doing here?" Aaron said when he saw the Press Secretary coming toward him.

"Well, I still have a job for the next two hours. So, I'm at work."

"Unlike me, yeah I know…" Aaron chuckled.

"The thought didn't even cross my mind!" Seth laughed, raising his hands in protestation.

"Where are the others?" Aaron asked.

"Emily is with Leane and Darby's Chief of Staff. I don't know about Kendra and Lyor. The President is getting ready in the Residence with the First Lady. And I was just waiting for Vic."

"Oh yeah… That's mostly for Vic that you are here, right?"

"Well, that's her big day too. She's becoming the White House Communications Director."

"35 and already Comm Director, isn't that cool?"

"Well, Darby is young, so she wanted a young team too…"

"I'm glad you got back together, man. You really look happier." Aaron said, honest.

"Thanks" Seth answered with a genuine smile.

They continued their talk in the hallways of the West Wing. Just like everybody else, Seth had put all of his things in a box that was waiting for him at the entrance of his soon-to-be former office. He would pick it up after the ceremony, when Eleanor Darby would officially become the new President of the United States. As the tradition wanted it, the new President and Vice-President were invited to the Congressional luncheon after the ceremony, and that was when the former administration would leave the White House.

"It always feels a little weird to come back here now that I don't work here anymore…" Aaron said as Emily and Kendra joined their conversation.

"Well, at least it's still our White House for the next… hour and a half." Seth answered.

"Wait until it's Darby's White House. It's going to be worse…" Kendra continued.

"Well, I don't see why I would come back here anyway, I won't have any business to do and no one to see anymore." Aaron shrugged.

"We are leaving for the Capitol in fifteen." Emily said as she looked up from her phone.

"I can't believe this is it. Since this morning, I've seen everybody leaving one by one. We're literally the last ones here…" Kendra admitted.

"Well, some are staying from one administration to the other…" Emily added.

"Yeah, but no one close to Kirkman. I mean, look at all the offices. Ours are the last ones waiting to be emptied."

All of the senior staffers had desperate looks on their faces. No one could really believe it.

"We should all go home for a drink after that. We should celebrate." Aaron said.

"Yeah, you're all invited at home." Emily confirmed.

"No, you're invited at home." Tom Kirkman said, arriving behind them.

"Sir?" Emily exclaimed, surprised by the President's offer.

"I wouldn't spend my evening with anyone but my senior advisers, cheering to these eight years. Bring the kids, it's been a while I haven't seen them." Tom Kirkman confirmed.

They all nodded and thanked Tom Kirkman for the invitation. And with that, they all were ready for that big ceremony. They were driven to the Capitol, and they took their seats outside on the West Front, where all the inaugurations had been held in the last few decades. It was a sunny day, but still quite chilly. Tom Kirkman's senior staffers were the only ones invited to the Inauguration. It was Darby's big day, not Kirkman's.

By 12 p.m., Eleanor Darby was sworn in, hand on the Bible held by her husband, and after her Inaugural address, it was over. All of Kirkman's senior staffers looked at each other, full of nostalgia. Flashbacks were coming to their minds, all these years at the White House were finally over. And if, in a way, they were happy to finally have a break, their hearts were also aching. Even hearing the words "President Eleanor Darby" couldn't make them realize that it really was it. They all went back to the White House, one last time, and took their time to look around, checking they had not forgotten anything. Aaron left for a few minutes to get the girls from daycare, and came back with them to pick up Emily. They had not come here often, but in a way, it was a bit their home too. It was thanks to this White House that they had become part of this world, and Aaron and Emily would make sure to always tell them everything about it, about walking in the hallways of the West Wing, about sitting in the Oval Office when meeting the President, or about the naps they had taken here when Aaron and Emily had not found anyone to look after them when daycare was closed.

"Mommy, why are you sad?" Inez asked upon seeing her mother with this sad look on her face.

"Because I will never come back here." Emily answered, lowering herself to her daughter's level and hugging her.

"Why?" Inez asked again.

"Because I will work somewhere else now." Emily answered.

"Like Papá?"

"Yes, just like Papá"

Inez hugged her mom tight, and Camila got closer to hug her too. As Aaron came back in the room, Emily stood up, wiping away the tear that was threatening to fall.

"Shall we go?" she asked. "I think I haven't forgotten anything."

"Sure." Aaron answered.

He walked closer to his wife and kissed her forehead, his hand stroking her back. Aaron took Emily's box under his arm and took Cami by the hand. Emily did the same with Inez, and with one last look, she left her office. She walked to the front desk, handed back her phone and credentials, signed the papers, and it was officially over.

They had spent eight years in the White House, but their whole lives were still ahead of them.


	54. The End-Epilogue

THE END/EPILOGUE

"Grandma, what is it like to work in the White House?"

Eleanor was fifteen but already into politics. It must be said that with Aaron and Emily Shore as grandparents, and Inez and Mark Whitman as parents, it was bound to happen. Inez was working for a Democratic Congresswoman on the Hill, and her husband, Mark, was a political science professor at a university. They had met through Camila, who had been a Spanish teacher in Mark's university before moving to Texas. As for Eleanor's uncle, Enzo Shore, he was working as a lawyer for an international organization dedicated to human rights, and was often dealing with politicians.

"What do you want to know about it?" Emily asked.

"Everything!" Eleanor exclaimed.

"Okay then, go get your grandpa, and sit tight, cause it's a long story… Bring back a blanket, you know he hates being outside when it's cold."

Eleanor ran inside to get Aaron, while Emily walked to the kitchen to make some tea. It was a surprisingly warm November day in Connecticut, but still not warm enough to stay outside for hours without a warm beverage and a blanket. With the years, Aaron had become even more sensitive to the cold, and he hated Connecticut in winter. He had nonetheless accepted to spend the end of November there, as Emily wanted to spend a traditional Thanksgiving with all of their kids and grandkids, but he couldn't wait to go back to Mexico. Now that both Emily and Aaron had retired, they were sharing their time between Mexico in winter and Connecticut in summer, a rhythm that suited both Aaron and Emily perfectly. Even after having spent more than fifty years in Washington, D.C., snow had always been something he disliked. So after they had both retired, they had decided to spend time in Mexico, but Emily had never been able to stay away from Connecticut for too long, even after her parents had passed away and even if no one from her family was still there, so they had bought a cabin in the woods where they would spend their summers, as Emily would usually say that Mexico was too warm for her in July or August.

When Emily was finished preparing cups of tea, she came back outside and sat on the porch where Aaron and Eleanor were waiting for her. She gave her husband his warm herbal tea as he wrapped his arm around her and put the blanket on her legs. Almost fifty years spent together, but they were still always attentive to the little things.

"How did you end up at the White House?" Eleanor asked.

"Don't you read your history textbooks?" Aaron chuckled.

"I do…" Eleanor rolled her eyes. "I know the Capitol exploded. But Grandpa, you were working there before, weren't you?"

So Aaron started telling his story, not that Eleanor didn't already know it, but she loved hearing it again and again. She loved knowing that even coming from a small town in Mexico, her granddad had climbed the ladder and arrived to the highest ranking job in Washington before his 40s. More or less secretly, she dreamed that she would follow her grandparents' path and be in the West Wing before her forties.

"You know Eleanor, it was terrible circumstances that led us to this job. We wish that to no one, even if it was our dream job, for both of us." Emily stated.

"I know…" their granddaughter answered, sighing. "Do you regret it sometimes?"

"Well, what happened happened. We cannot regret anything. Even if that is true, we got the job over the death of a thousand of people, it's those circumstances that led us together, and then led to your mom, to your aunt, to your uncle… So it's hard to say that we regret something, but of course, we wish it had happened differently."

"How did you deal with everything? People say there is a lot of pressure when you work at the White House."

"There is indeed, it wasn't always easy." Aaron said. "It was probably more often hard than easy actually, especially after your mother was born. We were young parents, sleeping five hours a night and trying to juggle between a baby and being reachable 24/7, running here and there all the time."

"Is this why you both stopped working at the White House after Kirkman's mandate?" Eleanor asked.

"It is a little more complicated than that." Emily started. "You know, Chiefs of Staff, just like most of the senior advisers, are people that the President trust. They are close allies to him, and we were ready to go to the end for him. So, even if we had wanted to stay, we didn't know Darby that well, we never really worked with her, she was Vice-President at the time we were in the West Wing, she had her own staff. We never would have been able to build such a trust with her as we did with Kirkman, even if we had wanted to."

"But you didn't want to stay anyway, did you?"

"Not really… I guess we never considered the possibility" Aaron said, looking at Emily.

"No, we didn't." she confirmed.

"Your mom and your aunt were already born, and Enzo was due a few months after the end of the presidency. We wanted time for us, time for our children. With the years, we had come to realize that we wanted normal lives, normal working hours, we had spent eight years putting fire after fire, and we never even imagined continuing."

And it was true, that looking back at it, they had never even imagined staying at the White House. They had both been sad to leave it, but relieved it was over. They had longly talked about what they would do after the White House, but had never even considered staying, it was actually one of the few things they had never talked about.

"But you could have continued doing politics, why did you change completely?"

"Completely?" Aaron questioned.

"I mean, you've never worked on the Hill again."

"That's right, but we never really left politics. Especially me." Aaron answered. "It's true your grandmother got further away from politics than I did, but it was still politics."

"I had that feeling that I needed to stay away from it, I had seen enough, and when you've been the White House Chief of Staff, nothing seems good enough after that, it's just not the same. I thought that I could use my experience to do something good about it, so that's why I started studying again." Emily explained.

"So you got that PhD, and then taught political science at Georgetown until you retired."

"Exactly…"

"Didn't you want that too, Grandpa? You could have become a professor too, that would have been cool."

"It would have yeah, but I just never felt like teaching. And I did some conferences, it was cool too. But I got a job at the OAS a few months after the end of Kirkman's mandate, and I really liked it actually."

"The Organization of American States?" Eleanor asked.

"Exactly. You know more than I did at your age…" Aaron chuckled. "And then, you know, ambassadors are appointed by the President. So when Darby lost the election for her second mandate, my ambassador was kicked out, and so I didn't have a job anymore."

"Oh, right… And you started lobbying."

"Yeah, the White House became Republican, and I have always been a card-holding Democrat. And what I hated the most about this new White House was how they treated migrants, I mean, I am half-Mexican. So I felt it was time to start fighting differently, and I decided to help associations that were protecting migrants' rights."

"That's really cool!" Eleanor answered, excited.

Eleanor was the second born of their grandchildren, but she was the most interested in politics, just like her mother. She was fascinated with politics and she just wanted to follow the footsteps of her grandparents and her parents. She was the exact opposite of her brother Joshua, 11, who couldn't care less about anything but baseball. He only had one dream in his mind: being a professional baseball player. Whenever he could, he would go to the stadium with his grandparents or parents, especially if the Washington Nationals were playing.

"Grandpa, grandma, can't you just stop entertaining her passion for politics? She's boring!" Louise exclaimed, walking outside on the front porch and making her grandparents chuckle.

Louise, Eleanor's cousin, was another one bored by politics. She was born six months before Eleanor and was the carbon copy of her mother, Camila: bold and adventurous. She was only fifteen but already wanted to travel the world with a backpack, speak Spanish and defend Latin-American tribes. Her father was the same too, he was traveling around the world with associations. She didn't see him often, as her parents had divorced even before she was born, but she was fascinated with his way of life. Camila had met Juan, an Argentine, and only two months later, they had eloped in Las Vegas. Six months later, they had divorced, Cami was four months pregnant. Saying that Aaron and Emily had been distraught was an understatement: they had been shocked when Cami had eloped, and had been worried when she had divorced. Thankfully though, she had met someone else about a year later, Ryan, and he had immediately considered Louise his daughter. Two kids were born from this union: Noah, who was now 10, and Gabrielle, 5.

"Okay, since you're talking about politics, I need to ask!" Louise said, sitting on the couch next to her cousin and stealing the blanket. "Why didn't you ever become a real politician?"

"What do you mean?" Aaron asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I don't know, run for an election, do something for real..."

The idea made both Aaron and Emily laugh.

"What do you think it means exactly to be a staffer for a Congressman or the President?" Emily chuckled. "You do know that they are actually really doing things and advising them, giving them ideas. It's not because they are not public faces that they are not actually doing something for real…"

Louise shrugged, not really sure if she was believing her grandparents.

"And anyway…" Aaron continued. "Neither one of us wanted a public job, White House Chief of Staff was already too public for us…"

"How so?" Louise asked.

"Well, we had to go in front of cameras sometimes, and there were articles about us in the media. So it was hard for us, especially for your grandmother. She was the first woman to be the Chief of Staff, and she had been pregnant several times during these years, and it was still a very sexist world. So we could hear comments about this and that, saying that a Chief of Staff shouldn't get a maternity leave, or that a woman wasn't fit for such a job…" Aaron explained.

"Isn't it still though? A sexist world?" Eleonor asked.

"Oh yeah, it is. Ask your mom about it. But it's better than it was fifty years ago… Especially since women have a maternity leave all around the country." Emily answered.

"Wait, there wasn't at the time?" Louise exclaimed.

"No, there wasn't. I had one because I was working at the White House, and the previous president had signed an executive order granting White House staffers a twelve-week maternity leave. But some women would go back to work only a couple of days after giving birth…" Emily explained.

"That is insane!" Louise continued.

"What is insane?" Enzo asked, arriving on the porch with his 3-year-old son, Logan, in his arms.

"Grandma was telling us that women didn't have maternity leave in her time." Eleanor explained.

"Oh, yeah. It's very recent actually. I think Inez and Camila were two of the firsts to enjoy it…"

"Yes, we were!" Inez exclaimed, coming outside too.

Suddenly, the whole family was outside, sitting on the couches or just leaning against the walls. Joshua and Noah were squeezing on the couch next to their sisters, Inez was sitting on an armchair with Mark standing behind her. Cami had found a spot leaning against the doorframe and Ryan was next to her, putting a warm coat on Gabrielle's shoulders. Sophia, Enzo's wife, had just come outside, rocking the 2-month-old Maisy as she had woken up from her nap crying.

"You know what!" Camila exclaimed suddenly. "We should make a bonfire, since the weather is so nice."

Suddenly, the kids were yelling, happy that Camila had suggested the idea.

"Can we make s'mores then?" Louise asked.

"A bonfire without s'mores isn't a bonfire." Camila answered.

"Do we have everything to make them?" Inez asked.

"I'm not sure… Check in the pantry." Emily said.

"Uncle Mark! Did you bring your guitar?" Noah asked.

"Of course I did!" his uncle answered.

"Is anyone else cold? I'm getting back inside, we should eat dinner before we make that bonfire" Aaron said, rising from his seat and making everybody laugh.

With the years, it had become a recurring joke as Aaron would always be the one to be cold, groaning because of the snow or the wind, or because his coat wasn't warm enough for Washington, D.C. or Connecticut.

"You can laugh as much as you want" he said, "but at least I'm not catching any cold."

The whole family laughed even harder as Aaron walked back inside, followed by his daughter who checked the supplies for s'mores. They decided to go buy some more chocolate, and by the time they were back, the fire had already been started, Mark was already playing the guitar and Louise and Camila were singing along.

Aaron found his traditional seat of head of the family around the bonfire, next to Emily who cuddled against him. It was sure, a lot of things had changed in the almost fifty years they had spent together, but their love for each other was still the same. Grey hair, wrinkles and old age were often making them think about the past, the present and the future, but not once they regretted anything. Through the rough times, through the greats, they had stayed strong and were proud to see what their family had become. Looking back at all these years, all these events, they were in peace with what would happen next, no matter how much longer they had to live.

"Grandpa, what's the best day of your life?" Noah asked.

"Easy!" he exclaimed.

"What?" Emily answered, surprised. "That's the hardest question ever! How can you say that!"

Aaron laughed at Emily's exclamation.

"It's easy because it's the day I met you. No matter what, everything was perfect after that day, because you were part of my life."

The whole family exclaimed in awe as Aaron softly kissed Emily. Yeah, even after almost half a century together, nothing had changed.

* * *

And here it is, it's officially the end. I hope you liked this epilogue as much as I liked imagining their life fifty years from now. Thanks again to everyone who read this story that dragged on for so long. Even two months after Designated Survivor's cancellation, I still hope Netflix is continuing their talks with ABC and Hulu to get them back, so keep tweeting, as long as we don't have news, there is no reason to lose faith, even if it is frustrating to see shows with a wider fanbase getting picked up because they are more powerful than our show, it means that it is doable.  
I have a few one-shots in mind that I could publish if some of you want them, and that would go over this forty-some years gap between the end of the White House and the epilogue.  
I also have in mind a new story, completely different, but I don't know if anyone wants to read it, as I know it's frustrating to read stories about a show when the show is over.

It was really cool to write this, thanks again for reading it!


End file.
